Some gaps can't be crossed quietly. The moment you step into one, the gap widens and fills the silence with a deafening roar. The next day felt different, not because of the change in circumstances for Loid Ainsworth, but because of what changed in the man himself.
"Alright class," Mr, Harrison said scarfing through the morning chatter, "group activity. Four students each."
The sound of furniture screeching filled the classroom.
Names began to be called. Friends quickly gathered by one another with no thought.
Everything was done with autopilot systems, with one exception.
Loid remained in his seat.
It was not a choice.
No one invited.
He quickly succumbed to the many groups. Jay was already laughing with Noah and Ethan. Mia joined Ava.
Again, normal and effortless.
And then, there was him.
"Loid."
His eyes broke focus.
Harrison slightly adjusted his spectacles. "You'll join that group."
Loid was now looking.
His chest began to sink.
It was, Charlotte Vale.
She was standing with Ava and a random classmate and was giving a quick glance in his direction.
No emotions, merely recognition.
Loid was now on his feet.
Every step he took, seemed deafening.
With a slightly amused and surprised look, Jay's face gave him a look, and said, "Good luck," without sound.
With no regard to Jay and no hesitation, he arrived.
"Hey," said Ava. "We need one more anyway."
Charlotte gave a small nod, of assent.
"Yep."
No emotion.
No refusal.
Merely acceptance to the extreme of discomfort.
They began to form a group.
Again, silence.
Charlotte finally broke the silence and took the liberty of owning the group task by picking up the worksheet.
"I'll divide the parts, to make this faster."
No one was in opposition.
her bossiness.
It came from other places, too.
Loid could see it in her control.
Speech, presence, leading and deciding seamlessly.
She passed out the tasks.
"This is yours."
It sounded nice.
Like she meant it.
But there was no feeling.
Like she was saying it to fill the air.
Loid said, "Yeah," and nothing more.
He didn't care.
The question was staring up in front of him.
The actions of Ava and the others were a blur in Loid's mind.
The way stimulation was effortless for everyone else.
The realization took him.
The gap was huge.
"Done," announced Ava.
Charlotte nodded before locking eyes with Loid.
He could see the command in her sentence.
"Combine."
Finished, Loid passed his work to the group.
There was a realization in her eyes.
Loit felt the control.
She said, "That's correct," and she moved on.
No control, no dismissal.
Loid decided it wasn't pointless to be right.
Something was missing.
The gap was huge.
Natural confidence was filling the spaces.
Loid felt out of place.
"Okay, we're done," Charlotte said, standing up. "I'll submit it."
She started to walk out of the room.
And the group split without another word.
Loid was left, feeling the same realization as the day before.
The gap was huge.
The same places.
The same things.
The gap wasn't just in his head.
It was real.
Visible.
Measurable.
And standing this close to her—
only made it clearer.
Jay dropped into the seat beside him a minute later.
"So?" he asked. "How was it?"
Loid exhaled slowly.
"…Normal."
Jay smirked. "That bad, huh?"
Loid didn't respond.
Because he didn't have the words yet.
Not for the feeling.
Not for the difference.
Not for the way everything around her seemed… effortless.
While everything for him felt forced.
Jay leaned back, studying him for a moment.
"Let me guess," he said. "You're thinking you're not enough."
Loid's eyes flickered.
Jay clicked his tongue. "Yeah. Thought so."
Silence stretched between them.
Then—
quietly—
Loid spoke.
"Not yet."
Jay blinked. "Huh?"
Loid looked forward, eyes steady.
"Not enough… yet."
For the first time—
there was no doubt in his voice.
Only something new.
Something stronger.
Something that hadn't been there before.
Resolve.
Jay stared at him for a second.
Then slowly smiled.
"…Now that's interesting."
Loid didn't smile back.
He didn't need to.
Because for the first time—
he wasn't just aware of the gap.
He had taken his first step toward closing it.