Chapter 16
I Summon, Eldritch Knight, I Choose You! Fire Blast, Now!
Jake should have left when the candles turned green.
In hindsight, that was the first red flag.
The Occult Research Club basement was:
Too dim.
Too symmetrical.
Too full of very attractive girls chanting in Latin.
Rias Gremory stood in the center of the circle.
Crimson hair glowing in candlelight.
"You may observe," she told Jake warmly.
He nodded.
He was here strictly for academic curiosity.
And maybe aesthetic appreciation.
Mostly academic.
Across the room—
Raven leaned against a pillar, arms folded.
Expression unreadable.
"You feel that?" she murmured.
Jake blinked.
"Feel what?"
The summoning circle pulsed.
The temperature dropped.
And then—
It answered.
That Was Not On The Syllabus
The circle cracked.
Not metaphorically.
Physically.
A black fissure tore through the air above it.
Something armored stepped through.
Towering.
Twisted.
A knight-shaped thing made of jagged void and screaming geometry.
Behind it—
More shapes.
Minions.
Clawed.
Multi-eyed.
Definitely not OSHA compliant.
Rias' smile faltered.
"…That wasn't in the spell."
Jake raised a finger slowly.
"Hypothetically speaking… can we put that back?"
The Eldritch Knight roared.
The building shook.
Wednesday Addams, who had somehow been standing in the corner the entire time, sighed softly.
Wednesday Addams flicked her wrist.
A rapier materialized in her hand.
Naturally.
She stepped forward.
Deadpan.
And stabbed the nearest minion clean through the chest.
It dissolved instantly.
She didn't blink.
"I dislike uninvited guests."
Jake stared.
"…Sure."
Backup Arrives
The ceiling tore open in a flash of golden light.
A cloak billowed dramatically.
Doctor Strange hovered above the ritual circle.
"Ah," he said calmly. "Teenagers."
Beside him—
A portal snapped open.
A white-haired man in a red coat stepped through casually, sword resting on his shoulder.
Dante grinned.
"Party looked loud."
Raven exhaled.
"Finally."
The Eldritch Knight raised its blade.
Reality bent around it.
Jake swallowed.
"…Mew?"
The pink cat floated forward.
Eyes glowing.
Club Synergy
The Duel Monsters Club burst through the door.
Seto Kaiba activated his duel disk.
"Demons are susceptible to dimensional sealing."
A holographic dragon roared into existence.
The blast struck a cluster of minions.
They shattered like glass.
Kaiba smirked.
"I was correct."
Across the hallway—
Music started.
No instruments.
Pure harmony.
Rachel Berry led the Glee Club in acapella.
The notes rang pure and bright.
The air shifted.
Minions shrieked in discomfort.
Jake blinked.
"…Is this boss battle music?"
Strange glanced sideways.
"Surprisingly effective."
Raven's eyes glowed.
Shadow energy lashed outward.
Wednesday lunged again.
Perfect posture.
No wasted motion.
No hair displaced.
The Tactical Clubs
On the upper balcony—
The Archery Club took position.
At the center stood Shirou Emiya.
Calm.
Focused.
Arrows of pure light manifested between his fingers.
Beside him—
The Gun Club deployed in synchronized formation.
Kouta Hirano grinned manically.
"Finally, extracurricular relevance!"
Energy rounds fired with surgical precision.
Minions dropped mid-charge.
Jimmy Neutron popped up from behind a table.
He adjusted his goggles.
"Dimensional destabilizer calibrated!"
Beside him—
Dexter slammed a button.
"Prepare to be banished to ze Shadow Realm!"
Mandark cackled somewhere behind a console.
A beam fired.
Reality screamed.
The Eldritch Knight staggered.
Jake's Contribution
"Okay," Jake muttered.
"Mew. Transform."
Mew shimmered.
Shifted—
Into the Eldritch Knight.
Perfect replica.
The original froze.
Jake blinked.
"…Fire Blast?"
Mew-Knight raised a void blade.
Instead—
Released a massive, controlled psychic burst.
The real Knight staggered backward into Strange's forming portal.
Dante fired twice.
"Jackpot."
Raven completed a sealing sigil mid-air.
Strange snapped his fingers.
The portal collapsed inward.
Dragging the Knight with it.
Silence.
Smoke drifted.
Candles extinguished.
Clean-Up Crew
The Service Club entered immediately.
Yukino Yukinoshita directed evacuation calmly.
"Decontamination protocol B."
Raphtalia coordinated injured students.
Raven scanned residual magic.
Jimmy and Dexter measured dimensional stability.
Kaiba adjusted his coat.
"Suboptimal summoning discipline."
Rias coughed lightly.
"…We were recruiting."
Jake stared at her.
"You almost recruited Cthulhu."
She smiled sheepishly.
"It was an accident."
Administrative Response
Principal Darkholm entered last.
Perfectly composed.
She surveyed the damage.
Shifted briefly into a tentacled horror.
Then back.
"Extracurricular enthusiasm is admirable," she said coolly.
"Containment is mandatory."
Her gaze landed on Jake.
"And you."
He stiffened.
"Yes?"
"You assisted."
He nodded slowly.
"Peer pressure."
She almost smiled.
"Noted."
Aftermath
As everyone dispersed—
Rias approached again.
Hair slightly disheveled.
Still radiant.
"You handled yourself well."
Jake sighed.
"I'm never attending a summoning again just because the girls are hot."
Raven looked at him.
Flatly.
"You will."
He blinked.
"…Fair."
Mew floated proudly beside him.
The school bell rang again faintly.
Like a reset.
Students resumed casual conversation.
Flyers were handed out.
"Join the Occult Research Club!"
"Duel Monsters Regionals!"
"Glee Club Auditions!"
Jake stared at the perfectly normal hallway.
"…This is Tuesday."
Mew nodded.
Outside—
Sirens faded.
The sky returned to blue.
And somewhere very far away—
Something noticed the seal.
And remembered.
End Chapter 16.