I spend the next few days at the pool, reading, swimming, relaxing. It's... nice. It's peaceful. It's... what I needed. I even eat there, since they seem to provide light meals for anyone who wants to lounge.
Llywelyn joins me, sometimes. We don't talk much, but we don't fight, either. We just... coexist. Enjoy each other's presence, in a weird way.
I feel... better. More myself. More... human. More...
I don't know.
But I like it. I'm starting to understand why he spends so much time there. It's therapeutic, in a way. A way to escape, without actually escaping. A way to pretend, for a little while, that everything is okay.
I don't forget. I don't give up. But I... accept. I accept that this is my life, for now. And I'm going to make the most of it.
So, when Xilukulkas summons me again, I don't dread it. I'm curious, and a little nervous, but... I'm not afraid. I can do this. I can make a choice. I can find a purpose. A role. A place.
I walk into his room, and he's sitting at his desk, as usual. But this time, he's not alone. There's another alien with him, a tall, thin creature with a long neck, four arms, and a face that reminds me of a horse. It's wearing a white robe, and has a pair of glasses perched on its nose. It's holding a tablet, and typing on it with one of its lower hands. I don't recognize the species, but I don't need to. I can tell it's some kind of assistant. Or secretary. Or... something like that.
"Ah, Sarah. Come in, come in." Xilukulkas says, smiling at me. His eyes are a soft green, and his antennae are twitching slightly. "I have heard you are doing far better now." He stands up, and walks around the desk, towards me. He's wearing a dark purple robe today, with silver embroidery, and his hair is tied up in a bun. He looks... regal. Elegant. And that's...
A strange mix with how much he towers. He should be intimidating, but somehow he's not. I don't know why. I can't explain it.
"I am." I say, nodding. "I... I've been thinking. About what you said."
He nods, and gestures for me to follow him. "Good. I am glad to hear it. And I believe you are ready to make your decision."
We walk to a large window, and he stops, looking out at the stars. I stand next to him, and do the same. The stars are... different tonight. More clustered, more colorful. There are more of them, and they seem to be... moving. Slowly, but surely. I don't know what it means, but it's beautiful.
"This is a special time." He says, his voice quiet. "Every loop of the galaxy, at this time, the planet passes through a nebula. A cloud of dust and gas, where new stars are born. It is a rare and wondrous sight. We will enter it shortly, and it will last for seven days." He looks at me, and his eyes turn a bright, hopeful yellow. "I want you to choose your duty before we enter the nebula. I want you to have a fresh start, a new beginning, a chance to embrace your fate with joy and enthusiasm."
I frown, and turn to face him. "What does that have to do with... my duty? Why the time limit?"
He smiles, and places a hand on my shoulder. His hand is huge, and warm, and it makes me feel... small. But not in a bad way.
I don't really know if I can explain what way it is.
"As I said. We all have our fate. When it is set, we must accept it. But there are times... when we may shape it before that." He tilts his head. With that strange neck of his, he looks exceptionally alien when he does so. "This is one of those times. This is your chance, Sarah. To choose who you will be. What better time to do that than as you bear witness to the birth of stars?"
"I... don't know." I admit, feeling a bit overwhelmed. "I don't know what I want. I don't know what I'm good at. I don't know what I... should do."
He chuckles, and pats my shoulder. "You are not bound to the same duty forever once you choose it. If you do not like it, you may simply change it."
"Wha-!" I gape up at him. "Th-then what the hell was that destiny and rebirth talk about?!"
He offers me a mysterious smile. "Was it not inspiring?" He asks, tilting his head slightly to the left, "Are you not eager to face your choices with the fervor of creation and hope?"
"...you're messing with me, aren't you." I squint up at him.
"I would never." He protests, raising his hands innocently.
"You're such a..." I can't even think of the word. "Liar." I settle on.
"You speak so brazenly." He chides, but there is no bite in his tone.
"You're the one that told me not to take my future so seriously." I sigh, shaking my head. "So, what, I can just... pick anything I want?"
"Within reason. If you choose micro-duties such as Llywelyn then I shall expect you to take multiple." He adds, "If you choose something large-scale, then it will likely be the only duty you have."
"Oh. And the things I can choose from are...?"
"Anything within the manor, or the moon."
I blink. "That's... broad."
"If you feel overwhelmed, I will choose one for you."
"And have you decide my destiny for me?"
He glances at me out of the corner of his eye. His lips are curved in an indulgent, tight-lipped smile.
I blow out a breath. "I'll choose."
"Excellent." He says, his eyes turning a warm, satisfied purple. "I am pleased. I am certain you will make a wonderful addition to my manor. Now. I believe you are still shadowing Llywelyn?"
"Uh. Yes."
"You should probably continue that today."
"Huh? Aren't I deciding the duty today though-?"
"Are you in such a rush you'd like to begin it today as well?"
"Er- well. I don't..."
He smiles again. "Llywelyn will no doubt miss you if you fail to finish your shadowing today."
I snort. "Yeah. Don't think that's so." Even if he did, I know he'd be too stubborn to say so.
"Is that so?" He hums. "Well, he may hide it well, but I've known him far longer than you, little human."
I give him a doubtful look.
I don't know. I guess he might be right. Llywelyn is... hard to read. He's always grumpy, and sarcastic, and aloof. And I've never been one to be good at reading even humans.
"Now then. You've decided?" He prompts.
"I... guess."
His grin widens. "Then go. I have no doubt you will make the right choice."
"Hm? You don't want me to tell you?"
"It is unnecessary. That you do it is enough."
I squint at him. "And what if I just let you assume I'm doing something and then not...?"
"Shall you discover?" He tilts his head at me, a knowing look on his face.
"...right." I doubt it'd be wise to test him. "Well, I guess I'll be off, then."
He nods, and waves a hand at me. "Yes, off you go. Do make time to come outside tonight, however. You will enjoy it, I am sure."
I nod, and turn to leave, but then I stop, and look back at him. He's watching me, his expression... calm. Serene. Patient. Like he knows something I don't.
"What?" I ask, raising a brow. "There won't be another dance will there-?"
"No. Llywelyn would most certainly become enraged and waste much of my time." He shakes his head, but then gives me another unreadable smile. "Merely enjoy the stars, Sarah. There are not many gifted with the sight of their birth." And with that cryptic comment, he turns away from me and back to his desk, apparently done with the conversation.
I don't know what to make of him. He's... weird. But I guess that's just how he is. He's an alien, after all.
I leave the room, and head towards the gillworg pond. Llywelyn's probably there, doing his thing. And I... I guess I'll join him.
Whether or not he's apparently willing to admit he wants me there.