If there were a god in this world, this shouldn't have happened. I simply couldn't understand why such a thing would occur.
I couldn't properly grasp the situation. She knew who I was, yet she treated me like someone she didn't remember, like someone she was meeting for the first time. It was difficult to accept what kind of reality she was facing.
How could she possibly know me yet treat me like a stranger?
Until I entered the Academy, surely no one would have known my name, so how?
If she had lost her memories, I wanted—needed—to know exactly what she had forgotten and from what point Kanna's perception of the world was being reconstructed.
I had to prevent this somehow, or Kanna would face unbearable pain regardless of whether she accepted the situation or not.
It was maddening. It was hard to properly gauge her symptoms. She seemed fine on the outside, but somewhere, there was clearly something missing. The thought was devastating.
I wondered if this was what happened to people with head injuries, and my face involuntarily crumpled.
"...Kanna, you, um, ah..."
I couldn't say anything.
With my words constantly failing me, I eventually just hung my head.
Kanna quietly observed me, then looked down at her clothes and tilted her head.
"What's this? Am I hospitalized? Why...?"
"Well, you fought with a Strange One..."
"Strange One...?"
It felt like we were speaking completely different languages.
Considering she recognized me, it must be around March. Even more specifically, before she encountered the Strange One, so I couldn't think otherwise.
That seemed fortunate, at least. The fact that she had lost her memories and I now knew the point from which her memories were restarting would help somewhat in understanding and managing the situation.
"Just... some things happened."
"But why am I with you?"
"..."
"I'm Kanna, but... this is weird. You're not my friend, are you?"
The atmosphere seemed to have changed. Was Kanna brighter before she officially attended the Academy? More cheerful?
Her innocent question hung in the air.
I found it difficult to answer why I was occupying her hospital bedside when we weren't even friends.
The reality was that from the moment I enrolled, I only hung around with Orca Ramiris, who held the Second Rank, and never even gave a thought to Kanna, who was at the Bottom Rank. My mouth felt heavy with this truth.
"Well..."
I had nothing to say to Kanna asking why I was caring for her when we weren't friends.
Yet I couldn't say nothing at all. Even if I took her home, all her belongings were at my place. She had been living at my house, so I needed to explain that fact.
But how could I explain this to Kanna, whose memories had all reverted to that earlier time?
I lowered my wavering gaze and carefully, painfully opened my mouth.
"It's May now."
"...What? Huh?"
Looking at Kanna's dumbfounded expression made my heart ache even more.
For her, the process of becoming friends didn't exist, yet suddenly she was being confronted with the result that we had become friends. If I were Kanna, I thought it would be hard to accept.
But I had to explain, so despite knowing this, I put into words the reality that would be difficult for Kanna to accept.
"It's May now... and you and I are friends..."
I wondered if I was crazy for thinking it might be fortunate that her painful memories had disappeared.
Forgetting being taken by the Strange One, forgetting the days of living miserably while being ignored and mocked by others for being at the Bottom Rank, even forgetting having her limbs cut off by those so-called Heroes—wouldn't that actually make her happier? Thinking this way made me feel self-loathing.
"And, somehow, you've been staying at my place."
"You're lying."
"It's true. When we go back, your suitcase will be there and everything."
"Huh, really?"
I silently nodded.
Then, realizing this wasn't the time, I hesitantly rose from my seat.
"I'll go call the doctor."
Evening came. In the meantime, the doctor had come and gone several times, and a teacher who had received the call rushed over.
"Yoon Ha-min!"
I was waiting outside the hospital room when Mrs. Lucia arrived.
"Is what Yoon Ha-min said true?"
"Yes, but I think it's still too early for her to return to the Academy."
I was about to relay what the doctor had said, but it proved unnecessary as the doctor approached with a file, meeting Mrs. Lucia.
"Oh, are you her guardian?"
"Yes, I'm Lucia."
"I see. Have you been briefed on the situation?"
"Ah, no. I just heard that Kanna had woken up..."
After assessing the situation, the doctor began explaining Kanna's condition to the homeroom teacher.
"The problem from the beginning was that treatment was difficult because we didn't know how she was injured. We couldn't determine what kind of impact occurred or what was damaged because everything had already healed. But after seeing her awake today and comparing with what the student caring for her said, it appears she's experiencing partial memory loss. There also seems to be some mental regression."
"...Pardon?"
When I first heard this from the doctor, it was utterly devastating.
Nevertheless, the fact that there was nothing I could do weighed heavily, miserably, powerlessly on my shoulders.
The teacher also seemed momentarily blank upon hearing this, unable to react as she listened numbly to the doctor's words.
"It's not uncommon for physical trauma to the brain to cause temporary memory loss, but whether this is temporary or permanent will require continued observation. As for the mental regression... since this is a psychological issue, this incident was likely just a trigger. Of course, since we haven't been able to conduct proper tests, these are all hypotheses."
I had firmly believed she would recover, but the realization that this might not be the case left me feeling defeated.
It was devastating to think she would have to leave the hospital without receiving proper treatment.
The only fortunate thing was that Kanna had regained consciousness, that she had opened her eyes, but as soon as that happened, another problem confronted me.
"You should meet her and then decide about discharge. Even with a longer stay, in her current condition, there are no tests or treatments the hospital can provide beyond bed rest and observation."
"I-I'll see her first."
The teacher showed a perplexed expression before gathering her resolve and turning to go.
In truth, I didn't want anyone to see her. Kanna was somehow different, and I didn't want to show her to anyone.
But that wasn't possible, so I followed behind, holding my burning heart tightly.
Beyond the opening door was Kanna, who had been awake for quite some time.
"Teacher!"
Her bright voice, which made her seem nothing like a hospital patient, made my insides burn.
Every time I saw that cheerful appearance, it was as if she was saying, "I was happy until I entered the Academy."
"But why are you here, Teacher?"
"Kanna, I came as your guardian. They said it was necessary for the hospitalization procedures."
"Really? Thank you."
Kanna bowed her head politely.
The accumulated stress had clearly affected her mind during this incident.
Was it because of the atmosphere at the Academy? Was it the stress from the Strange One? Or was it because she had her limbs torn off by those so-called Heroes?
I couldn't fully understand the stress Kanna had been carrying.
I could only observe from a third-person perspective, try to put myself in her shoes, and think, "I see," while barely grasping it.
The pain I felt was ultimately just the result of empathy, and couldn't truly approach her genuine stress.
I could only feel a numbing sadness.
"Kanna, are you experiencing any discomfort?"
"Me? I'm fine!"
"Anything that's been difficult?"
"Not really! By the way, when can I leave the hospital? It's too stuffy here."
"Yes, yes. If there are no aftereffects, I'll process your discharge."
The teacher wore a troubled expression but, realizing there was no solution, answered Kanna's question.
"I'm sorry for causing trouble."
"Not at all. I heard you did really well this time. Other Heroes said so too."
"Who? Me? Come on, how could I do something like that? I think you've got the wrong person."
Kanna dismissed it with an expression that said, "What a joke."
Silence briefly filled the hospital room.
I couldn't begin to imagine the depth of her wounds—seeing her condition, knowing it, and giving up on herself first.
I was even afraid to say, "I'll hurt in your place."
But if she had to endure this pain, I wanted to bear it for her.
As I secretly swallowed the surge of emotion, the teacher, concerned about Kanna, offered a helping hand.
"Kanna, I know you don't have a guardian. Would you like to stay at my place? Just for a while. It's good to have someone nearby in case you need to return to the hospital quickly."
Kanna tilted her head at this suggestion.
"I'm fine, really. Yoon Ha-min asked me to live with him."
At this shocking statement, Mrs. Lucia's head turned quickly toward me.
Her gaze demanded an immediate explanation for what she had just heard.
"...Uh, well, you see..."
I broke into a cold sweat, not having realized that my offer to continue living together and help Kanna if things got difficult would become such a bombshell in front of the teacher, given that we had been living together.