Bruce regretted that he'd let his kids and protégés talk him into attending the party without any of his gear.
The reasoning had been sound, at the time. Wearing a Batman undersuit or carrying any of his equipment into a literal criminal party was practically begging to get exposed. That was before factoring in whatever strange luck-based ability he suspected Jean Valjean of having.
Still, he would've brought something. If not for his entire family being strangely united in their determination to keep him from bringing anything even remotely Batman-related.
Not that Bruce had come entirely unprepared. On the off chance he needed to don the cowl, he had already made sure several hidden equipment caches were stashed around the Iceberg Lounge.
The problem was getting to those caches.
Some kind of strange portal had opened in the main second-floor lounge and spooked a large portion of the attendees. Now, most of the partygoers had been evacuated and scattered across the various private lounges, including Jason's. The unfortunate side effect was that Bruce had lost several valuable minutes greeting vaguely familiar "businessmen", all of whom wanted to schmooze with Bruce Wayne.
It wasn't impossible to slip away, but with this many witnesses, it would hardly be ideal for Bruce Wayne to vanish and Batman to suddenly appear at the scene.
John's message left him unwilling to take the slower route, though.
Letting John Constantine handle anything unsupervised was a recipe for disaster.
So Bruce was forced to consider some rather unique methods.
"Get in the fucking suit, Bruce."
Jason's voice crackled in his ear, barely held together through a storm of laughter. Associating Bruce Wayne with the Red Hood in front of dozens of partygoers wasn't exactly ideal, so Jason stayed in the far corner.
Bruce kept his face perfectly placid through sheer force of will.
The so-called suit was one of the inflatable air costumes. This one, in particular, was a puffed-up version of Batman with a ridiculous shocked expression on its face. Batman merchandise and novelty costumes were hardly rare, but still...
His dignity.
He was supposed to be the Dark Knight.
Not…
"Don't worry," Jason said, sounding far too entertained. "I'll have one of my guys come in wearing the same costume for the switch. No one will be able to tell. The mission always comes first, right?"
Damn it all.
—
Zatanna couldn't help but whistle at the sight of the party in full swing. She had heard about the big party, but this was way beyond her expectations. From the rooftops, she could see thousands of people had packed across the place.
She had come as fast as she could when John messaged her. Much as she tried to trust her sort-of friend and mentor, John was still John.
"He's taking a while…"
Even if this was more League business than magical, having John involved made the situation delicate. Bruce might not appreciate it, but he really couldn't complain if she helped speed things along.
"Esiugsid em dna wohs em eht yaw ot ym dneirf!"
Her standard magician's stage outfit vanished into smoke. In its place came a simple pair of pants and a shirt that would not look out of place in a club, with a few slight changes to her makeup, and voilà.
A sphere of light visible only to her eyes shimmered into existence and drifted downward, tracing a path toward Bruce.
So she made her way down through the party.
It always surprised her how terrible most people were at recognizing faces. A little outfit change, a touch of makeup, and a subtle shift in demeanor, and suddenly you were an entirely different person.
She followed the sphere toward a quieter section near the first floor of the Iceberg Lounge. Thankfully, no one bothered her much, and the crowd thinned as she moved along, searching for Bruce.
Where was he…?
The sphere finally stopped and shone brighter. She rounded the corner.
"Hey, B—"
She froze at the sight in front of her.
One of those exaggerated Batman inflatable costumes sat surrounded by a small gaggle of children. A few adults stood nearby watching as well, but what really caught her eye were the two other women beside the costume, both dressed in their own Batman outfits. She couldn't make them out fully, though she caught a hint of green and pale white skin beneath the masks.
"Say it with us now!" the ashen-pale woman said, poking both the inflatable Batman and the other costumed woman. "Who are we?"
"BATMAN!" the children screamed.
"That's right! The Dark Knight! The Ball Buster of the Night!" all three Batman costumes declared in unison.
Zatanna could practically hear the despair in the other two voices. The children, however, didn't care in the slightest and only screamed louder with delight. It took almost all her effort not to break down laughing.
She could only stand there and watch as the trio dressed as Batman, two of whom she was fairly sure were Harley Quinn and Poison Ivy, entertained the children for another minute.
The show didn't last long. A few adults soon led the children away, and Harley Quinn said something happily to the inflatable Batman before leaving with Poison Ivy.
The little back corner fell quiet, leaving Zatanna staring into the inflatable Batman's ridiculous eyes. She wondered what kind of face Bruce was making in there.
"Um…"
"Zatanna, can you shroud us?" a professional voice answered.
"Right… duorhs su morf thgis dna dnuos."
Reality bent slightly as a barrier settled around the two of them, making sure no one could see or hear what happened next.
Bruce quickly climbed out of the costume and, with a few swift movements, pulled a Batman suit from a case hidden in the wall. She looked away for only a moment, and when she turned back, Bruce Wayne was gone.
Batman stood in his place.
"Let's hurry. We've already been delayed enough. Can you fly us up there?"
She nodded. "Ylf su."
Slowly, she and Bruce began to rise toward the second-floor lounge John had mentioned. Bruce was categorically silent, even more so than usual, but she had to ask.
"Did you know that was…"
"I was aware. But the timing was… unfortunate. I got cornered by a group of children. They weren't causing any issues, so prioritizing getting out of that situation by cooperating and remaining nondescript was essential."
"So you're saying that was essential for your mission," Zatanna teased.
"...I've no idea what you're talking about." He kept his eyes fixed ahead.
"Oh, I think it went something like—"
"Not a word." He shot her a glare.
Zatanna had to fight back her laughter. It was rare to see Bruce this thrown off balance.
Barbara was going to love this.
She raised her hands in surrender, and Bruce merely grunted.
They quickly reached the second floor and landed on one of the balconies. From there, the two of them moved inside toward the lounge where the portal had opened. Strangely, for all that this was supposed to be a criminal party, it felt as though they were expected. A few partygoers pointed and stared, but no one tried to get in their way.
"Whoa." Zatanna paused at the sight of the giant pile of armor, though even more than that, she could feel the lingering flow of magic. Something big had passed through here.
Bruce stepped toward the heap and picked up a small piece. He scowled at it. "Apokoliptian tech."
Her eyebrows shot up. "That's the one that tried to invade Metropolis a few years ago, right?"
"Yes." Bruce pulled out a device and began scanning the armor. "That doesn't bode well for Gotham. We need more information. Where is Constantine?"
She was just about to cast a spell when she caught a whiff of demonic magic she had long since become familiar with. She turned at once.
"John—"
"Heyyy, Z!" John's inebriated form greeted her, except he was floating.
Zatanna paled as she noticed a tiny angel carrying him along with telekinesis.
What the…?
"Good old Gotham City personal Justice League angel liaison!" John announced.
The hum of a song drifted into her ears. Liquid floated up and quickly formed the letters of the word hello.
"Your city is so weird," she said.
Bruce took one look at the tiny angel carrying a drunken Constantine and merely let out a tired sigh.
***
Comments and Thoughts would be greatly appreciated. Likes are like a drug to me and boost my creative juices.
I have advanced chapters on my Pa tre on/daisyberry if you wanna read ahead.