**Day 21: Before Noon – The Depressing Guild**
Come to think of it, I couldn't even become an adventurer, yet here I am showing up at the adventurers' guild every single day like a diligent shut-in…
Well, I'm a shut-in who can't go home, and I'm a loner who gets yelled at by twenty high school girls every day…
"So, like… is there any request that feels really exciting? You know, the kind where you make a fortune in one go and never have to worry about money again~?"
"If someone starts worrying about money the very next day after receiving eight million ele, exactly how much would a get-rich-quick request need to be to make that worry disappear? There isn't one!"
Yeah, the class rep and the others left early this morning, so I missed out on the morning glare. Coming here to replenish my daily dose of deadpan glare was clearly the right move. As expected of the receptionist class rep. She currently holds the title of best glare user in the entire other world. I don't know any others anyway.
No, seriously, there really isn't any. I'm not even picking a fight or anything. There just aren't any. Is the economy bad? Is there a monster shortage? The good jobs are so scarce it makes me worry. There's nothing. Absolutely nothing.
"I mean, it's the same as yesterday. Nothing's changed, right? There was no point in coming to look, right? You're not even doing your job as the bulletin board person, right? You're basically Jean Valjean! You're gonna steal bread, right? Do I get a silver candlestick or something~?"
"I don't know why you think no work means you get a silver candlestick, but exactly when are you planning to start sneaking around properly?"
Good, I've replenished a full day's worth of glare component. As I always thought, the glare is the faint light at twilight. The glare is the final darkness, the final dawn.
**Aside**
I got yelled at.
The girls' group probably won't be back until evening. Since they're out hunting while receiving guidance from Akemi-san and the others, it might even run into the night. Akemi-san seems like the type who'd work at night too. I wonder what kind of shop… From a high school boy's perspective, I really need to earn money!
I know mushrooms sell for a high price. They're quite valuable items—premium goods that don't even hit the regular market. They used to be overstock no one wanted, but now they've made it big. Way to go, mushrooms.
That's exactly why I can't sell them.
If the girls keep them, they can use them as medicine or food in an emergency, and they can also turn into money. This is something they should carry with them. For adventurers living in town, it's probably more useful than money. Just having them gives a sense of safety and peace of mind.
In fact, at the general store they sold physical mushrooms and magic mushrooms for 50,000 ele each. Apparently mushrooms have grades, and the lowest ones go for 50,000 ele. Since the buyback budget wasn't enough, I traded them for simple version item bags.
Simple item bags are expensive for how little they actually hold, and they can't take big items either. Still, they'd be incredibly convenient to have—especially for adventurers.
Each one costs a million ele, so the girls probably can't get them easily. They're rarely available, but eight happened to be in stock and I bought them all. Adult purchase! I paid with mushrooms, though.
If I stuff them full of mushrooms and add some naturally sweet, unlimited-supply berry juice on top, they should feel reassured. I've also left magic stones with the class rep.
At this point I really should head back to the cave, but those otaku still haven't shown up. Seriously, where the hell are those otaku otaku-ing around? They said they'd wait in town but they're not here. They're not waiting at all. They're just otaku-ing. Those otaku are seriously otaku-otaku-ing all over the place.
Maybe I should just go. Otaku hunting.
Waiting is annoying.
Wouldn't hunting them be faster?
They're probably otaku-ing somewhere anyway.
Yeah, I left a message at the inn. There are only two roads leading out from this town. I don't know which one they took, but they must be otaku-ing down one of them. So I'll hunt. Because that's where the otaku are otaku-ing.
For now, let's try the road leading downstream along the river.
First, I sneak out the gate by quietly following behind some merchants.
After that, I'll fly and hunt any otaku-looking types I spot along the way. That should work. It definitely should. I'll handle it nicely.
.
.
.
Anyway, I'm running—or rather dashing, or bouncing—making good progress.
I tried flying at first, but I was too fast and couldn't see anything. If I can't see, I can't hunt, and crashing every time hurts. Even if my clothes don't tear, pain is still pain.
So now I'm running. At this speed I could probably reach the cave in less than a day. If I fly I could even make it a day trip, though it hurts. If I endure the pain it should be doable. There'll be damage, but I can manage. The victim will be me, though.
This latest crash took out about thirty goblins with me. Those goblins have terrible timing—gathering in a big group right where someone's about to crash. Goblins really can't read the room at all. In the old world they'd probably get bullied together with the otaku for being so bad at it. The otaku are otaku-ing, the goblins are goblin-ing, and at this rate the kobolds are definitely kobold-ing too.
There were some villages along the way, but no sign of the otaku so I ignored them.
There were carriages too, but no sign of the otaku so I ignored them.
There were bandits too, but no sign of the otaku so I ignored them.
A carriage was being attacked by bandits, but no sign of the otaku so I ignored it.
"Kill that brat with the bad eyes too! Leave no witnesses!"
"Huh? Fire Bullet———! Burn, burn, burn, burn, burn, burn, burn, burn, burn, burn, burn, burn, burn, burn, burn, ke-ro, ke-ro, ke-ro, ke-ro, ke-ro, ke-ro… What am I, a drill sergeant!?"
Good, I feel refreshed. Like I've always thought, when you feel stressed, the best way to relieve it is to stress the thing that stressed you until the stress is gone. Stress relief achieved. The stress from the bad eyes comment also exploded. Feeling great.
"…"
"Huh? It didn't explode? Was the burning not enough? Undercooked?"
"You brat! Are you a mage? Damn it, we've got magic defense gear and everything… What the hell!? Why!?"
Huh? The other bandits are getting up too. Guess the burning really wasn't enough? They look pretty charred, though. Did I hold back too much?
The tattered, staggering bandits surround me. What I was looking for was otaku, but… haa~, I'm surrounded by old guys again. What is this? What did I even do? Why do only old guys keep gathering around me? Is this some old guy convention? And even if you ask me why, I have no idea.
"Are you stupid? If you want to know why, go ask the shop where you bought the gear. Ask the guy who made it. Why are you asking me? I don't know. There's no way I'd know. Do I look like a magic defense gear salesman to you? You think I'm about to start a product demonstration? Expecting a bonus item like 'buy one magic defense set, get another free'? I'm not giving you anything, and I'm not selling anything. Who's the salesman here!"
"Shut up, you damn brat."
What the hell? You ask "why" and then tell me to shut up when I answer. What is that? Don't you know how conversational catch ball works? Not that I'm bragging, but the class rep recently told me I'm the king of conversational wild pitches… That wasn't bragging… It was a dead ball straight to the heart.
"He's a magic user! Surround him! He's only got a staff—close combat!"
They're surrounding me. Close combat, apparently. Why are they even explaining it to me?
"Uraaaaah!" (Bonk)
"......?"
"Doryaaaaah!" (Crack)
"......??"
"Magic user?"
"Huh? Unemployed."
"Haaah…?"
"Eeeh…?"
If you're going to say "haaa" then don't ask. You made me answer. Why are you dealing mental damage during battle? That actually hurt. My heart hurts!
I took massive damage.
A critical hit.
"This kid's Lv 9…? Use weapon skills!"
"Lv 9! Don't underestimate us, damn it!"
Tch, they saw through my concealment. Guess someone has Appraisal. Weapon skills, huh… Apparently getting hit by them means death.
"Slash" "Double" "Slash" "Cross" "Bash" "Swing" "Slash" "Rip" "Slash" "Crush" "Slash" "Fast" "Attack" "Thrust" "Slash" "Cross" "Bash" "Swing" "Slash" "Rip" "Slash" "Crush" "Slash" "Fast" "Attack" "Thrust" "Slash" "Rolling" "Bash" "Slash" "Cross" "Bash" "Swing" "Slash" "Square" "Rolling" "Bash" "Square" "Slash" "Cross" "Slash" "Rolling"… (and it loops)
So annoying.
""""Haa… haa… haa… haa…""""
Well, if you make that much noise during battle, of course you'll run out of breath. That's just stupid.
""""Haa… haa… haa… haa… haa… haa…""""
Aren't you guys out of shape? Being a bandit means your body is your capital, you know? Though your heads are beyond help…
The "Evasion Mantle – SpE +20%, Evasion Power Up (Small)"—it was only "Small," but it seems pretty effective? These guys have techniques, but they're slow. Slower than the kobolds. Their SpE is probably lower than a Lv 5 kobold. Their heads are goblin-level. Their faces are orc-level, though?
Oh, they collapsed? Bad faces. Cyanosis? Or just ugly? Orcs?
.
.
.
"Thank you very much. For defeating the bandits? Or rather, they fell over…? Thank you for helping us? Wait, didn't you pass by once already…? Thank you very much? With the utmost gratitude."
Yeah, it was less "defeated" and more "they fell over" or "they're collapsed." Respiratory distress? Probably not asthma.
The soldiers are making a fuss. Maybe the mushroom flavor really was bad, or they smelled too mushroomy.
"Their weapons were coated with poison, most likely…"
Darn. If even a graze had landed, I could have used that huge stock of antidote herbs… They never get any use. They're just grass. Weeds. I basically just did some weeding.
But the level wall really is dangerous. Even attacks that don't look like much are sharp, fast, and heavy.
The attackers themselves are slow, but their hands—or rather their swords—suddenly become sharp, fast, and heavy.
So that's a weapon skill. Shouting nonstop while doing intense exercise… Is it a diet plan? One more set? Captain? When I get back I should teach the class rep and the others about it. Apparently all that expensive dried fruit disappeared in one night… It was pricey too. I got yelled at for wasting money, but they did the same thing in one night… No planning at all…
"Um… Hellooo? Yoo-hoo? Are you listening~?"
Oh, the young lady was saying something.
"Are you hurt? I have some suspicious mushroom-flavored liquid if you need it? And right now, there's even a second bottle!"
"...?"
Apparently she doesn't want it. Figures.
The soldiers are tying up the bandits. They seemed affected by the poison but have recovered. Good, that's really good. The large quantity of antidote herbs actually came in handy. It wasn't meaningless weeding after all. I even bragged with a smug face saying "Antidote herbs? Is this a flag?" They weren't just grass. They weren't mere weeds. The soldiers recovered, but they all smell like mushrooms now, which is nice.
"…Excuse me~? Helllooo? Please listen~? It's really lonely if you don't listen~? Hey~"
Oh, the young lady was saying something again.
"I am the daughter of the lord of the town of Omui. My name is Merielle Shim Omui. Are you listening? Really? I've already introduced myself about five times, you know? I'm going to cry."
"I'm listening, I'm listening. I'm listening extremely hard. I'm Haruka. Merimeri-san?"
I was listening properly, but she seems to doubt my memory. Apparently she's from the town of Omui. The lord's daughter. A young lady. A noblewoman. It took me three weeks in this other world just to meet a noble's daughter. At this rate meeting a princess is definitely impossible. It'll take fifty years. I'll be an old man by then.
"…Geez, I'm really going to cry now, okay? Full-on sobbing, okay? Don't blame me if you drown! Why won't you listen to me~? And who is Merimeri anyway~?"
Oh, the young lady was saying something again.
"Haruka-sama. We are returning to Omui. If it's not too much trouble, would you accompany us? We'd like to thank you properly, and… our guards would very much like to request your escort as well."
"Hmm~, that's fine, but is it close? If it's far it'll be a problem. I need to get back to town by night."
"Which town did you come from, Haruka-sama?"
"Ah~, the town upstream along this river? What was its name again…?"
"…I'm sorry. I'm probably the shabby daughter of the shabby lord of that nameless, unknown town. I'm sorry for acting like a young lady from a nameless family. I'll change my name to Merimeri. I'm very sorry…"
The soldiers got mad at her.
.
.
.
The gate guards got mad at me too.
Come to think of it, I had snuck out. I ended up coming back normally in a carriage.
"Yeah, yeah, Omui. Super famous. Everyone's talking about Omui, Omoi. It's super popular and well-known. Even the goblins were saying Omoi, Omui. They were saying it."
I'm in full follow mode. I've been in follow mode the whole time in the carriage. Maybe forgetting her name twice during the follow was bad? I'm still in full follow mode. I might become a follower.
"Why would you want goblins to know the town's famous? That'll just get the town attacked! And sometimes you're saying Omoi. It's Omui. It's nameless but it's Omui! (crying)"
I was spotted in town making the lord's daughter cry and got yelled at by the class rep.
It came out that I snuck out the gate and got yelled at by the gate guards, so I got yelled at by the class rep.
The note I left at the inn said "Going otaku hunting" so I got yelled at by the class rep.
When I followed up by saying I didn't manage to hunt the otaku, I got yelled at by the class rep.
And when the soldiers told her I fought high-level bandits who used weapon skills, I got yelled at by the class rep. She was crying while yelling. She kept yelling while crying the whole time.......