Dumbledore. "???"
Garfield leaned in and whispered, "Hela. Full name Hela Odinson. Goddess of Death. The biological daughter of Odin, the Allfather of the Norse gods. You can't mess with her. And—"
Dumbledore was already flustered by just the introduction. Then Garfield played hard to get, saying only half of it.
Curious despite himself, Dumbledore asked, "And? Just say it all at once. Maybe I can handle it."
Garfield pointed a paw at his own nose and reluctantly added, "I also have another name now.
Garfield Odinson. Odin's godson. I inherited part of Hela's—"
Thump.
Dumbledore clutched his heart and pretended to be in distress. "Don't tell me any more of this. Just pretend I was never here."
This old bee. He's obviously faking it.
Garfield played along, clutching his own chest dramatically. "Hey! Let's go find a cliff and jump off together!"
Dumbledore rolled his eyes at Garfield. This cat was too wicked.
He knew perfectly well Dumbledore was faking, yet he still played along.
Dumbledore didn't move. Garfield didn't either. Instead, he raised a paw and used a summoning charm to produce two cups of mead.
He handed one to Dumbledore, and the two continued chatting as they drank.
"Old Bee, actually, you don't need to worry about Hela. Just deal with Grindelwald alone."
"Then... what about Hela?"
"Naturally, leave her to me. I'll go find my godmother and tell her not to interfere too much in your affairs."
"What exactly does 'not interfere too much' mean?"
"It means, as long as you don't kill Grindelwald right in front of her."
"Oh. That's not so bad."
If it was really as Garfield said, Hela wouldn't directly interfere in his and Grindelwald's conflict, then Dumbledore only needed to restrain his own people from provoking her.
That way, he could resolve his own grudge with Grindelwald.
His destined battle with Grindelwald was meant to be settled between the two of them.
Whether Grindelwald would ultimately die according to fate, however, was hard to say.
After all, according to prophecy, Grindelwald being killed in his sleep was like the ending of the eldest brother in the tale of Death and the Three Brothers.
There was also a legend in the Dumbledore family, when they suffered calamity, a phoenix would descend from the sky to help them.
✦••┈┈••✦••┈┈••✦
Old Tom had left quickly and returned quickly.
When he came back through the Diagon Alley entrance and saw the room now covered in cat paw prints, he knew for certain he wasn't dreaming.
His pub now belonged to the orange cat currently deep in conversation with Dumbledore.
"Boss. Dumbledore. Hello!"
Dumbledore. "Hello, Old Tom."
Garfield. "Prepare a hearty lunch. I'm going to chat with Old Dumbledore a bit longer."
"Yes, boss."
Old Tom called to the stunned house-elves to get to work in the kitchen, while Garfield and Dumbledore continued their conversation.
As for the earlier customers, after witnessing Dumbledore's arrival and Garfield's marking skills, they had quickly run off. Some went to find their families.
Others went straight to the newspapers, hoping to sell the news for a good price as fast as possible.
By the time Garfield and Dumbledore sat down at the table to eat, the British wizarding newspapers had already published two major stories:
**"LEAKY CAULDRON CHANGES HANDS – THE TRUTH IS SHOCKING"**
**"MINISTER DUMBLEDORE AND KING GARFIELD IN SECRET TALKS – SUSPECTED COOPERATION BETWEEN THE TWO PARTIES"**
An owl delivered the newspaper to the pub. Old Tom handed the owl two Bronze Knuts, and it flew away satisfied.
Old Tom opened the newspaper, glanced at it, and quickly handed it to Garfield.
Garfield glanced at it briefly and lost interest. He was, after all, trained by the UC Shock Department. He wouldn't be easily fooled by sensational headlines. Besides, he was the protagonist of the news—he knew the truth perfectly well.
Dumbledore, however, was quite interested.
He examined the report carefully, rubbed his glasses, and quipped, "The newspaper's intelligence is surprisingly accurate. It's a shame they're not spies."
Garfield picked up a piece of steak with his fork, put it in his mouth, and reminded Dumbledore between chews, "Actually, you could try contacting wizarding newspapers from various European countries."
"Get information through their own channels. Sometimes their noses are incredibly sharp. It might save you the trouble of arranging everything yourself."
"That's a good suggestion. To be honest, Garfield, if you were helping Grindelwald come up with ideas instead of me, I'd probably just give up."
"Old Bee, remember, sometimes you shouldn't make promises carelessly. They might come true the next day."
"Oh, right. The house-elves here are still so skilled. You really made a good deal buying this bar."
Speaking of the bar, Garfield thought for a moment and reminded Old Tom, who was idling at the bar, "Old Tom, from now on, Dumbledore eats for free here."
Dumbledore's eyes widened. "Good heavens. I eat a lot."
Garfield pulled a stack of cat-paw-print gold bricks from his pocket. "Eat. Eat big. Is this stack enough?"
Looking at the stack of gold bricks in front of him, Dumbledore couldn't help but twitch.
He had heard rumors over the years about what had happened in a certain island nation, especially the fact that they had even spent a fortune to come to the European continent searching for dragons.
It was true that dragons existed in this era, but most were wild wyverns.
True dragons were rare, and all of them were exceptionally powerful. Dozens of wizards might not be enough to take down a single one.
"Garfield, you didn't just raid some island nation's treasury again, did you? I heard they've been short on military equipment for years due to lack of funds."
"Oh my god, I almost forgot about them! I just grabbed these randomly from space."
"Gold is a rare precious metal on Earth, used as currency. But some planets in the universe are made entirely of gold. They're worth less than potatoes!"
(⊙o⊙)...
Wizards weren't completely ignorant.
They had some astronomical knowledge, they at least knew what the moon, asteroids, and the sun were. An entire planet made of gold wouldn't even cost as much as a potato.
Good heavens.
The value of getting something from space!
To be honest, even Dumbledore was tempted.
Seeing Dumbledore's excited expression, Garfield couldn't help but dampen his enthusiasm. "Don't get too excited."
"First, you need to be able to survive in space. Second, you need to actually *find* these planets."
"Third, planets in space are exposed to all kinds of cosmic rays, the equivalent of which could instantly kill an ordinary person. You'd need to know how to deal with those rays."
Dumbledore realized he couldn't meet any of the conditions Garfield had listed.
He shook his head. "Forget it. I can't do any of those. I'll just stay here and eat for free every day."
Garfield reminded him, "Lodging can also be free. Oh, by the way, Dumbledore, send some people to help me expand the Leaky Cauldron. Don't worry about the cost."
Dumbledore raised an eyebrow. "What kind of expansion are you planning to make it?"