25 years ago
I don't believe my mother would have me again if she had the choice. I don't think I blame her either. I think everything would have been better if I wasn't alive. I don't think I ever earned the right to live. I was born like no one else has been. My eyes glow orange like a furnace, my arms are pitch black claws and my body is covered in ridges that make me float at unfortunate times. My body has developed twice as fast as the other children's, I'm expected to reach maturity in a few more years. I know I'm the one causing problems for everyone, so why is it that I hate them so much? They all think I'm like those beasts that attack our home, they think I'm some sort of infiltrator. They think I can't hear them but I can.
"What the hell is she?".
"How can she do that?".
"She can't be human right?".
"She hurt my baby boy!".
They won't stop giving mother trouble. They keep harassing her over me. I shouldn't even understand concepts like that yet but I do. It terrifies everyone. I think that if I walked past the walls, into the ocean those monsters call home I'd feel more at peace. But those are just the delusions of a monster. I'm not like them either. I'm not like anyone. I don't enjoy feeling this way. I don't enjoy worrying about what will happen when mother gets home.
"I'm home." She says in that same tired tone when she closes the door. Ever since father left she's had to take up more hours at work to keep the lights on. I walk up and hug her. I think it's more out of obligation at this point. Ever since I left a scar on her back with my claws by mistake I doubt either of us has wanted to do this. But we have to, no one else will do this for us. Dubai hasn't exactly been a place full of love for a few centuries if my studies have been accurate.
"I've made dinner." I tell her with a hollow smile. We wordlessly sit at the table and eat the pasta I've made.
"I'm told you were attacked again." She doesn't even look up from her plate.
"Yes. Some men tried to assault me on my way home.".
"Are they alive?".
"Y-yeah." I look away in embarrassment. I've never killed anyone before but I've had some close calls. "I came close though. I shot a laser out of my eye." A few years ago mother would have a panic attack every time I did something crazy. But she's learnt by now.
"Well as long as no one died I guess it's fine." I don't know if either of us are truly happy, but I think I'm fine with that. This is a perfectly acceptable life for me. I wouldn't mind if things stayed like this a while longer.
24 years ago
The wall was destroyed. A lot of buildings are being torn apart by huge lizards and I don't know how this happened. I've been able to keep any monsters that attack us at bay but I don't know how long I can keep mother safe. We made it to an area protected by the ranger force but they won't let us in. Or more accurately they won't let me in. I've never seen mother cry this much. She wont let go of me even when the men try dragging her. Another one attempts to attack me but I just break his arms. I don't like the satisfaction I felt from that. I also don't like the feeling I get from seeing my mother breaking down as she dragged into the safe zone by men who don't care about her. I don't know when I walk away, I zoned out. I only come back to reality when someone crashes into me. From what I've seen normal people would be knocked over by the force but I don't budge an inch. I look down at the adult man sitting on the ground. There's blood dripping from the knife in his hands.
"Y-you monster!" He sobs. I look down and see a stain of blood growing on my stomach. By the time I look back at the man he's laying on the ground dead.
"Are you ok?!" A woman with a strange accent kneels in front of me and looks at the wound. In an instant it disappears. My confusion only grows when I spot the beautiful wings coming out of her back. Her blue her seems out of place with the orange of the fire all around us.
"Your like me." I whisper. Have I been scared this whole time? Why do I want to go back to mother? I try to run the tears away but they won't stop.
"Sh. It's ok. It's all going to be ok. I'm sorry I left you alone for all these years. I needed to know if it could work." She gently strokes my her and closes her wings around me.
"W-what?" I can only get a single word out at a time.
"Your the first hybrid I've managed to make. And not only that, you've become a hero." Now she's the one crying. I don't think I'm going to see mother again. But the way this strange lady talks about me makes it seem like what's different about me is actually a good thing. A hero is good right? So that must mean I've been given a gift by this woman. Powers I can use to defend myself. I pull this mysterious woman into a hug, clinging to her perfectly white dress. I feel the ground around me crack more and more as I cry. I hate these emotions, I do t want to feel all of this. Why did everything have to change so suddenly?
22 years ago
This sucks. When a witch shows up and talks about how she's going to take you away to be a hero you'd think it would be less boring. But with Louhi working on making more hybrids I haven't gotten a lot of time away from the mission. Apparently most proactive monster attacks are few and far between. Louhi and her sisters almost exclusively fight only to keep people away. My home was just one of the proactive ones. I think I should be more conflicted about that but I'm choosing to believe that mother survived that incident. So most of the time I'm wandering the world on my own, fighting monsters and anyone who might give us trouble. Louhi compared it to xp from a video game, not that I ever played those.
"Good morning my brave hero!" Although that also doesn't mean I'm alone too often. Louhi just appears sometimes, though it's not like she's actually here. It's just witch magic, even if she seems a little incredulous to that term.
"Hello." I say. "I've heard some rumours that there may be some people like me in Venice." I point to the titular location in the distance. A huge amount of its buildings were converted into diamond from a kaiju attack, not that it affects me too much.
"Oh wow. I must be getting better at this. Please go and check it out. Don't cause a scene though, we're just here to check, not take anyone. Taking care of that many people would be a pain. Besides, most people probably won't become heroes like you did. How is that going by the way?" Her image follows me as I cross the miles in seconds.
"Good. I can feel my connection the the planet growing stronger. I need less and less of it to ignite my own soul. I can transform much more easily." I try not to brag. "Don't worry. This will be simple.".
2 hours later
I hold the little girl in my arms as we look out at the destroyed buildings. It turns out I should have covered myself up more, people reacted to me even more strongly than they did at home. The bottles being thrown at me by civilians were at worst a nuisance and I knew the local ranger force was no match for me. The real trouble started when I saw how little regard they had for the hybrids here. Most of them were being kept in a government sanctioned orphanage. The conditions were detestable. This girl is only 3 and yet they couldn't even be bothered to feed her. I couldn't stop myself. I want to feel satisfaction from this but I can't. All I can see is blood and all I can hear is screams. I hate this. I'm going to be sick.
"I'm taking her home with me." I tell Louhi in no uncertain terms. She looks out at the crater I caused solemnly and nods.
"I can't guarantee she'll be a hero.".
"I don't care about that.".
19 years ago
I stand atop the spire the ranger force of new London call a base. Soon they'll realise I'm here and send something after me. Coming all the way back here was illogical but I needed to do it. I've been considering something for a few years now, but I've been too much of a coward to go through with it. I think the memories of what I did here is what I need to do what needs to be done.
"I like this city the most." A few feet below me is Jormy, hanging from the edge of the spire with a burger in her hand. A six year old really shouldn't be in this sort of situation, but she's been joint to my hip since I found her. But between her massive reserves of power and surprising intelligence my concern is minimal.
"Their food is probably the best." I answer her. Since this is the last time I'll speak to her like this I thought there would be more to say. But I can't find the words. It's all I can do to keep the tears back. We both host wait there, the wind out only company. "This is the first time I took part in an attack." I tell Jormy. I think she is the only one I'd ever tell that to. "Self defense is one thing, but killing this many people was always something so far away. Louhi just said it's to keep people from getting 'uppity' while we work on the true plan. But I killed someone I don't think I should have." When I see the comfused eyes Jormy gives me I realise I've made a mistake. She's too young to understand what I mean. She still hasn't seen the reality of what we have to do to be heroes. "I killed someone close to Morrigan. She was protecting her children I think. I don't like to think that I was going for them but I'm not sure. I was so caught up in it all." When two mechs fly up behind us I give them nothing but an annoyed glance. The laser vaporises them and keeps going, leaving a massive hole in the clouds. Even something as simple as that felt horrible. Did the people in there have children as well? "I dont want to feel like this anymore. I know I have to do this but I can't. So I did some reading. The brain is made up of sections. There's parts that control emotion, let you feel things. I know where it is now." I refuse to look at Jormy for this. I don't want to know her reaction. It's easier to think that she's ok with this. With my regeneration I will probably survive this. But I don't think it's too much of a loss if I don't. So as I her the child beside me yell my name, I tear into my own head with my claws, my brain soon following.