Loren quickly arrived beside Beerus.
Observing the God of Destruction up close gave Loren an almost irresistible urge to pet him like an ordinary cat.
He extended his hand and gently patted Beerus' smooth, purple skin.
The texture was unexpectedly good.
Beerus showed absolutely no reaction.
He merely smacked his lips, rolled over, adjusted into a more comfortable position, and continued snoring loudly.
Loren raised an eyebrow, then added a bit more strength and patted him again.
This time, Beerus' ear twitched irritably.
And that was it.
The pinnacle existence of Universe 7 was sleeping like a dead pig.
Loren withdrew his hand, crossed his arms, and observed Beerus thoughtfully.
Should he wake him up violently… or tease this Cat God a little more first?
His gaze slowly settled on Beerus' furry ears.
An idea suddenly popped into Loren's mind.
A rather strange smile appeared on his face.
He extended his hand again.
This time, his fingers landed precisely at the base of Beerus' left ear.
A forbidden zone.
A mysterious region that no feline could resist.
The next second—
Beerus' thunderous snoring abruptly stopped.
His body trembled violently.
The scratched ear twitched at an absurdly high frequency.
Immediately after that, a deep, rumbling sound—like an engine starting—rose from Beerus' throat.
The entire fishbone nest trembled slightly under the strange vibration.
Beerus let out a satisfied purr.
Loren's fingers slowly slid from behind the ear down to Beerus' chin.
The normally majestic face of the God of Destruction unconsciously leaned closer, actively seeking a more comfortable angle for petting.
His long, slender purple tail slapped the ground rhythmically behind him.
Pat. Pat.
One hind leg even kicked contentedly in mid-air.
Loren watched the scene, barely holding back laughter.
This was the God of Destruction?
The being who terrified countless civilizations across the universe?
Right now, he looked like a spoiled house cat—completely defenseless, exposing his softest belly.
Loren's hand suddenly stopped.
Beerus' satisfied purring immediately turned into a displeased, nasal sound.
"Hm?"
He clearly wasn't happy about the sudden interruption of service.
After playing with the cat long enough and getting his amusement, Loren finally withdrew his hand and floated into the air.
He looked down at the massive nest constructed from countless giant fish bones, and at Beerus sleeping deeply within it.
It was clear now.
There was no way this sleeping Cat God would wake up like this.
If gentle methods didn't work…
Then he could only use something more direct.
Something more Saiyan-like.
Loren raised a finger.
A golden glow quietly condensed at his fingertip.
Whoosh—!
The energy blast shot out and struck one of the supporting fish bones.
The giant bone shook violently.
A chain reaction instantly spread throughout the nest.
Crack… crack…
Countless fish bones ground against one another.
The entire structure began to rock violently, as if struck by an earthquake of magnitude eight.
Beerus bounced along with it.
His limbs flailed as he muttered a few indistinct words in his sleep.
But that was all.
The God of Destruction showed no intention of waking up.
"…That didn't work?"
Loren was genuinely impressed.
As expected of Beerus—his sleeping ability had probably reached the pinnacle of existence.
Since one wasn't enough…
He'd just do it a few hundred more times.
Loren slowly rose higher into the air, spreading both hands wide.
The next second—
Hundreds of golden energy blasts rained down like a storm, blanketing every corner of the fishbone nest.
Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang—!!!
The explosions merged into a single deafening roar.
The nest trembled violently under the relentless bombardment, swaying as if it were about to collapse at any moment.
Countless bone fragments scattered in all directions.
Beerus was tossed up and down like a ball, completely unable to maintain a sleeping posture.
His body clearly sensed danger.
But his consciousness stubbornly refused to wake up.
"He's still not awake?"
Loren stopped attacking and stared at the half-destroyed nest in silence.
It still wasn't enough.
If he wanted to wake Beerus…
He'd have to use some real medicine.
"Sigh. I didn't want to make such a big scene."
Loren sighed helplessly.
He slowly brought both hands together at his waist.
A blue light began gathering in his palms.
At first, it was only a faint spark.
Then it rapidly expanded, becoming dazzlingly brilliant.
The entire dream world was dyed a deep, pure blue.
"Kamehameha—"
Loren's voice echoed across the empty dreamscape.
He didn't aim at Beerus himself.
Instead, he targeted the massive central pillar supporting the nest.
"Ha—!!!"
A colossal Kamehameha wave roared forward.
Rumble—RUMBLE—RUMBLE—!!!
A deafening explosion shook the world.
The central pillar snapped instantly.
Having lost its core support, the entire fishbone structure began to collapse catastrophically.
Giant bones fell from above, crashing into one another.
Beerus, who had been sleeping at the top of the nest, was finally forced awake by the world-destroying power.
His eyes opened groggily—
Just in time for countless massive skeletons to bury him completely.
Boom—!!!
The final debris smashed into the ground.
The earth trembled.
Loren slowly descended from the air, landing before the massive pile of ruins.
"…He should be awake now, right?"
The moment the words left his mouth—
The mountain of bones shook violently.
An overwhelming, furious, terrifying aura—thick with pure morning grumpiness—erupted from the center of the ruins.
Boom!!!
All bone fragments were blasted away by an invisible force.
A purple figure slowly rose into the air.
The God of Destruction, Beerus, had finally awakened.
"WHO—WAS—IT—!!!"
His enraged roar echoed throughout the entire dream world.
"Which bastard ruined my bed?!"
The next second—
Boom—!!!
Violent purple destructive energy exploded outward from Beerus' body.
A terrifying shockwave swept across the dream world, erasing everything in its path.
The world itself groaned under the pressure.
Space cracked open with black fissures.
Loren had already retreated to the edge of the dream world the instant the energy erupted.
Beerus' morning temper was even worse than he had imagined.
"ROAR—!!!"
Beerus screamed at the sky.
"Come out! Get out here! I'll beat you half to death—then destroy you completely!"
Purple destructive energy blasts fired wildly in every direction.
Each blast erased another portion of the already-distorted dreamscape.
The ground was left riddled with terrifying void-like scars.
...
Author's Note:
The fanfic Dragon Ball: I Became Invincible by Being a Lazy Salted Fish! is now fully completed.
The entire story has been uploaded on Patreon as a dedicated collection:
📚 Dragon Ball (Chapters 1–404)
Organized into 47 posts, with multiple chapters per post for easy binge reading.
🔥 I also have additional 18+ fanfics available for readers who enjoy exclusive mature stories. 😉
1. Dragon Ball: Oolong's Sex Adventure
2. Elements of Lust – ATLA & Korra Mixed Smut
3. Doraemon: Filtering with Nobi Tamako
4. The Naive Me Who Became Someone's Everyday Secret
5. High School DxD: Rias Gremory, the Phenex Bride
6. Versatile Mage: Awakening the Succubus System
🔗 patreon.com/Shadow_demon_007
Thank you all for your continuous support and love for this story 💙