I am Xun Lyam, a student of class 10-A. My last year of school.
Everyone says school life is the best time of your life. It had the best memories.
My friend from Kindergarten once told me that too.
But I wouldn't agree with that.
My only memories are the gold medals and the certificates I have. My room is filled with perfect scores.
At first I thought it was great; my mom praised me, celebrating with cakes.
The cycle started in kindergarten.
"Mom! See, I got 1st in my class..." the little me said."
"Oh my little Xun, that's great. Let me treat you with snacks today." My mother's smile back then was genuine, not the fake ones I get today.
But now?
I am not sure if I am happy.
Even if I get perfect scores, 100/100, I don't get the smile of my mother anymore.
"Mom! I got a perfect score in my half-yearly exam," I said proudly.
"Good job," she said without even looking up from her phone. Zero emotions.
And Taraka Ji, my rival, maybe feels the same too.
Every time I get first and he gets 2nd place.
Class 7th:
I got 1st place in the final exam.
Outnumbered him by 5 marks. It wasn't big but it was our first spark of rivalry.
He looked at me with his eyes. It wasn't filled with sadness it was filled with a fuel.
"I will beat you next time." He said there.
"Then try." I said with a calm voice.
"It was fuel to keep going. That fire between us only made the rivalry burn hotter."
But...
"Him beating me?"
"It only happened twice: once in 6th grade and once in 8th. He kept his word and beat me that second time."
The first time was in 6th where I caught the flu, and the second time was when my arm was broken in a car accident.
But I still wrote; I still gave the exam with my broken hand. I never stopped,never missed an exam.
"Xun, why are you here? You should have taken a break, it's just an exam," Mrs. Chun Ling said, my English teacher.
"No ma'am, it's my duty to take the exam, haha..." I was foolish back then.
Everyone thought I and Taraka hated each other, but it's not true. We were neutral, I think.
We never talked outside of the ranking of the class, though.
And now we are on the rooftop together alone. No one will hear us here.
And the reason for us being on the rooftop is...
The Final Exam of 9th class.
I was confident as usual. I gave the exam. Taraka was behind me.
We talked about the easy questions every day.
"Taraka, how was your exam?" I asked.
"Well honestly it was good. I am expecting 97 marks. What about you?"
...
But on the results day, my life, and maybe his life too, collapsed.
"Let me see it," I pushed some students to see the paper. And my jaw dropped.
My place was 3rd and Taraka's was 2nd.
It wasn't bad; I was off by only 4 marks.
But the fact that 2 mysterious students beat us in the exam made me sick. I knew that the result wasn't bad.
[Note: The results are published by codes so the names aren't announced unless one reveals it voluntarily.]
I got a score of 895/900.
A near-perfect score; everyone dreams of a score like this.
At night.
"I am so disappointed in you, Xun," my father said, looking at my ranking.
"I am so... sorry Dad... I will try harder next time," I said, looking down.
"Little Xun, I am so disappointed by the fact that 2 random students beat you by a huge 4-mark gap," my mother said.
"But Mom? There are 6 thousand students; it's not a bad result though..."I tried to say.
"How dare you talk back, you ungrateful brat!" my father shouted.
"Uh, honey, don't shout. It's just once. Xun, please go to your room and study," my mother said.
I left them arguing in calm voices back and forth.
Was my result really that bad? Does it really matter this much?
No, no, Xun, stop this thought. You must make them proud.
__
And now I am here with Taraka.
"Xun, I am ending it.
I will not be your rival anymore. I am done with it and I realized something.
No matter how good your grades were one semester, you can become trash. You become a failure.
So now, I am going to stop chasing grades. I will enjoy my high school life this year.
I will do all the things I should've done years before. I have nothing except grades and now I will chase every fun activity,"
Taraka's words hung in the air.
Taraka kept eye contact with me.
"Why are you telling me all this?" I said, breaking the silence.
"Because you are the one I have closest to a friend.
I know we never talked aside from grades, but now I am leaving. I am not your rival anymore.
I am here to invite you. Let's start a new chapter of life. Let's do all the things we should have done instead of chasing grades.
"Let's enjoylife."
It's the last chance fate will give us; next year we graduate." Taraka said in deep voice
Enjoy life? Taraka's words hit me like a truck.
He is right. One bad grade and my parents did that to me. They didn't ask about me once in years.
But...
"Sorry Xun, you may still study but I am leaving this life. It's not worth it."
Taraka started to leave the rooftop.
I should let him go. My parents have expectations of me. Should I abandon their expectations?
"No, Taraka, wait! I will enjoy life with you. Let's do the things we've never done. Let's have fun. Let's enjoy life together."
I don't know what that was. Maybe my reflex? Maybe my mind? I don't know...
But I won't waste my life for a marksheet that none will ask for in my grave.
Maybe I wouldn't have agreed to Taraka if my mother gave that smile once more, or if my father acknowledged me that day.
But now? A choice has been made.
"Let's enjoy life!" I said smiling.
We both ran to the door and left the rooftop with energy like never before.