The air in the inn room seemed to freeze in that instant.
Wiz's already pale face had turned nearly transparent. Her hands twisted together anxiously, and though her voice was as faint as a mosquito's buzz, every word sent a chill through the room.
"Hans-san... he isn't human. He's one of the Demon King's Army's rare mutant Poison Slimes. His body is an extremely potent poison. If he wants to, he can instantly swell large enough to cover the entire spring source, dissolving and absorbing every living thing he touches... And he hates being interrupted while he's feeding. Or poisoning... more than anything..."
"What did you say?!" Kōichi shot up from his chair, his expression changing. "Isn't that basically physical attack immunity plus infinite regeneration? Whose turn was it to go with Aqua today?!"
"I-it's Dust..." Kazuma realized how serious this was too and swallowed hard. "That blond punk who only knows how to brag in taverns and doesn't even have a decent magical weapon? Against a Slime, he can't fight back at all. He'll just turn into an extra serving of protein!"
"Damn it! Move!" Kōichi grabbed the staff from the table, not even taking the time to put on his coat properly. "We've tormented Hans for four days straight. He's already on the verge of a breakdown! If he finds Dust and Aqua cleaning up after him tonight, he'll absolutely lose it and reveal his true form on the spot!"
...
On Arcanletia's main road under the night sky, several figures sprinted forward in a sorry-looking rush.
Kōichi ran at the front, swinging his staff like a fire poker to clear the way.
"Stop! Curfew is in effect. Large groups are forbidden from running around at night!"
Several soldiers in fine armor, the sacred emblem of the Eris Order engraved on their chests, abruptly leveled their spears and blocked the group's path.
"Tch, of all times, we run into the rarest thing in this city. Normal people?" Kazuma slammed on the brakes, panting. "Kōichi, quick! Use that 'I am Aqua-sama's secret envoy' trick to fool them!"
Kōichi wiped away his sweat, put on a holy and untouchable expression, pointed toward the mountaintop, and shouted.
"Devout believers! The Goddess Aqua appeared to me in a dream just now and said an evil Slime is defiling the water source on the back mountain. If you don't let us pass, tomorrow's hot spring water will turn into foot-washing water for Eris followers!"
If they had been ordinary Axis Order followers, they probably would have already dropped to their knees and kissed Kōichi's shoes.
However, the soldiers across from him merely raised their brows coldly and lowered their spears even further.
"Enough nonsense. We are guards of the Eris Order, assigned by the Royal Capital to protect the spring source. We've seen plenty of Axis Order lunatics. Take one more step, and we'll arrest all of you for disturbing public order!"
"Damn it, these guys won't budge!" Kōichi cursed under his breath.
Just then, Darkness, who had been running at the very back, suddenly charged to the front.
She tore open her cloak, revealing her gleaming golden Crusader heavy armor and the family crest hanging at her neck, proof of her status as a top noble.
"Stand aside! I am Lalatina Ford Dustiness, eldest daughter of the Dustiness family!" Darkness's voice rang through the night with a dignity rarely seen from her, though her face was still unnaturally red. "A disaster on the level of the Demon King's Army has indeed occurred on the back mountain. As a follower of Eris, I swear on my family's honor. If you delay us and cost us this chance, can you bear the consequences?!"
The soldiers looked at one another, intimidated by the aura of this perverted noblewoman. They quickly withdrew their spears, saluted, and let the group pass.
No one had time to thank them. They raced up the rugged mountain path.
Before they even reached the Great Holy Spring, a suffocatingly thick, sweet, fishy stench hit them in the face. Immediately after, an agonized scream tore through the silent night.
"Awooooo! Help! My clothes! My handsome face! Kōichi! Kazuma! Save me! I'm gonna be melted by this lump of purple snot!"
That was Dust's voice.
The instant Kōichi burst out of the forest, the sight before him made him suck in a sharp breath.
The once-clear Great Holy Spring had completely vanished. In its place was a huge, translucent mass of gel, three stories tall and glowing with an eerie purple light.
Hans had fully revealed his true form.
His enormous body was like a constantly writhing black hole, wrapped tightly around the spring source.
The unfortunate Dust was being held in midair by a purple tentacle. His beloved leather jacket had already begun to smoke and dissolve, exposing his pale belly.
On the other side of the Slime, Aqua was sitting on the ground sobbing loudly.
"Waaah! Kōichi, you're finally here! This blond man suddenly got huge and said he was going to eat me, the Water Purification Maniac, for afternoon tea! My Holy Water doesn't work on him at all! His poison concentration is higher than a septic tank!"
The air around the Great Holy Spring was filled with a sharp, fishy smell that made people think of spoiled grape juice.
The giant purple jelly, Poison Slime Hans, stood three stories high, waving dozens of translucent tentacles. The unlucky Dust was dangling in midair, caught by one of them.
His once somewhat stylish blond hair was now a mess like a bird's nest, half his face was swollen like a purple eggplant, and white foam kept spilling from his mouth.
"Well, well, isn't this Axel's famous number one thug, Dust?" Kazuma stood with his hands on his hips and looked up at Dust hanging in the air. Not only did he show no sympathy, he even wore an especially wicked grin. "How did you go from tavern boss to Slime emergency rations in just a few days? That street-stall leather jacket of yours looks like it's almost fully digested. Want me to take a picture for you as a souvenir?"
"Ka... Kazuma! Kōichi! Stop messing around and save me already!" Dust struggled desperately in midair, screaming like a pig being slaughtered. "This thing doesn't just have awful breath, it's covered in strong acid! If my handsome face gets ruined, how am I supposed to flirt with the girls at the Adventurers Guild?!"
The giant Slime let out a deafening roar. A crack split open where its blurry face should have been, and Hans's voice, full of hatred and rage, came from within.
"Shut up, you lowly humans! Because of you, the poison I spent half a month cultivating has been diluted into mineral water! I'll shove every last one of you into my stomach and let you slowly become part of my body while you scream!"
Hans's tentacles suddenly paused. His huge purple compound eyes fixed on Wiz, who was hiding behind Kōichi, and his voice carried a trace of fear he could not quite conceal.
"Wiz... you traitor! As a Demon King's General, you dare to mingle with these monkeys? Are you planning to become enemies with an old colleague like me for the sake of these humans?"
Wiz trembled under Hans's pressure, her translucent body looking even more fragile beneath the moonlight.
She waved her hands frantically, tears welling in her eyes.
"N-no, no, no! Hans-san, you misunderstand! I-I'm just a passing Magic Item Shopkeeper with terrible business! I've always upheld absolute neutrality and would never take part in any battle! Please, please just treat me like air!"
Hearing Wiz say that, Hans froze for a moment before bursting into arrogant laughter. His huge gelatinous body shook violently with each laugh.
"Hahahaha! Just what I'd expect from the cowardly Ice Witch! Since you won't interfere, these beginner-level scraps can obediently become my nutrients!"
Hans suddenly heaved his massive body upward, and countless barbed tentacles came crashing down toward everyone like a storm.
Kōichi looked at the overwhelming purple shadow, then at Kazuma beside him, who had already started searching for an escape route.
In that split second, the two exchanged a glance. It was a deep resonance across dimensions, the kind only scum and sadists could share.
Their mouths moved at the exact same time and spoke one word.
"Run!!!"
Kōichi and Kazuma spun around almost simultaneously, putting everything they had into a full sprint as they prepared to flee. However, before they could take even one step, both of their foreheads slammed hard into a cold, solid wall of flesh radiating a disturbing kind of zeal.
"Ow!"
Kōichi clutched his nose and stumbled back three steps. When he looked up, Darkness was standing as steady as a mountain, blocking the only path of retreat.
The Crusader's cheeks were flushed red, her eyes were hazy, and there was even a suspicious glisten at the corner of her mouth as she growled in an extremely excited voice.
"Where do you think you're going? That deadly poison strong enough to dissolve steel, that enormous, sticky, aggressive body... Ah! This is the ultimate end I've always dreamed of! Kōichi! Kazuma! Hurry and push me into the center of that Slime! Let me endure that endless torment in your place!"
"Hey! You pervert, stop blocking the way!" Kazuma desperately shoved at Darkness's completely unmoving body. "That thing will kill us! It will actually kill us!"
Kōichi looked at the purple tentacles closing in before his eyes, then at Darkness, who had reached such a state of ecstasy that communication was impossible. He took a deep breath and slammed his staff against the ground.
"Damn it, we can't run. Fine then. Aqua! Stop crying! Put every defensive buff you have on Darkness! Megumin, find high ground and start chanting! If he wants to go big, we'll blow him into purple potion all over the ground!"
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