Chapter 134: Hook: Thank You, Big Brother Dan Heng
"Nooooo! Why?!"
Stelle's cry of anguish echoed through the room.
"Dammit, what's so wrong with the Warp Trotter?! They actually limited it to just one so quickly! My ultimate Trotter strategy is ruined!"
"Why don't you take a moment to reflect on what the Warp Trotter has done to the meta?" Rekka countered dryly. "If Interastral Peace Corporation didn't step in, Aetherium Wars would have turned into Trotter Farming Simulator. Everyone would just give up on battling and spend their days hunting pigs instead."
March 7th stared at Rekka, her expression one of utter disbelief.
"How can you say something like that?!" she gasped. "Aren't you the one responsible for the meta becoming like this in the first place?"
"Forget it," she sighed, her shoulders slumping dramatically. She shuffled over to him. "Come here and rub my conscience for me. It hurts."
In truth, ever since she had discovered the power of the Warp Trotter, the triumphant smirk had hardly left March 7th's face.
Rekka played along, patting her shoulder with mock solemnity. "Alright, rubbing… so, does your conscience still hurt now?"
"It still hurts."
Stelle's brow was deeply furrowed in thought. "How are we supposed to win the championship now? Our strongest stall team has been officially banned! Without our unkillable fortress, I…"
"I have a plan," Rekka said with a knowing smile.
Their next opponent was summarily crushed by March 7th and Stelle's new composition.
"So… dirty…" the defeated player muttered from the floor.
"What did we do?" Stelle asked, feigning innocence.
"Nothing much," March 7th added, scratching her head. "We just… stacked defense, healed a bit, added some shields, and reflected a little damage…?" She tilted her head. "Isn't this a perfectly normal way to play?"
"March, look," Rekka said, pulling up a forum on his phone. "The entire player base is begging us to stop breaking Aetherium Wars… See, to convince the developers that their own favorite teams aren't overpowered, they've started a coordinated campaign to hype up other Aether Spirits."
He showed them the screen, which was flooded with similar-looking posts.
[Coordinated Post: The Incineration Shadewalker is OP!]
[The Frigid Prowler isn't OP, the Incineration Shadewalker is the real problem!]
[The Frigid Prowler is trash now, everyone should build the Shadewalker.]
Rekka chuckled. The Incineration Shadewalker wasn't overpowered at all; it was just a solid unit. The Frigid Prowler, on the other hand, was genuinely broken. This was a classic case of crying wolf to avoid a nerf—a desperate fantasy, but a common one in gaming communities.
"They're really trying their best," Stelle noted with a hint of admiration.
There were also some… stranger comments mixed in.
"It's fine, we don't use Overlord-type Aether Spirits anyway. This nerf only affects the top players. There are so many other combinations, we'll just have to test them all one by one."
"You sound like the grim reaper methodically working his way down a list," March 7th remarked, planting her hands on her hips. "But I like it."
Rekka had, in fact, discovered a hidden mechanic. If a player chose not to use any of the powerful Overlord-type Aether Spirits and only fielded common ones, the game would secretly grant them a massive critical hit rate bonus. He understood the truth of game design all too well: perfect balance was an impossible dream.
"If you use a full team of Overlords, the crit rate is suppressed to its normal value," he explained, spreading his hands. "But if you use all common Aether Spirits, your crit rate can easily push past eighty percent. It makes sense, right? If new players without any powerful Spirits kept losing and quit the game, what would be the point?"
He shrugged. "This is also why new players feel like they're critting all the time when they start, but after playing for a while, they notice their Spirits don't crit nearly as often."
"You've really figured out all their little operational tricks," March 7th said, impressed.
The trio swaggered back to the Aetherium Wars arena in the Administrative District, ready for the final showdown.
"Congratulations on… winning the championship," Giovanni, the tournament organizer, said. He hesitated, his expression a mixture of professional courtesy and sheer exhaustion. "However… although you won, your methods were… too insidious, too despicable, too shameless… and," he added with a reluctant grin, "too much fun."
"It's fine," Rekka replied casually. "Players are like that. Once they study the game more, they'll find counter-strategies."
Giovanni then led the three of them not to a grand stage, but to the frigid expanse of Everwinter Hill.
"Why here?" March 7th shivered. "Are you trying to freeze us to death?"
"Pathstriders don't really need to worry about the cold," Rekka noted, rubbing his chin thoughtfully.
Giovanni cleared his throat and then, to their astonishment, pulled out a piece of paper. "This is… a Ban List."
"A Ban List set up specifically for us?!" Stelle shouted, pointing an accusatory finger. "This is rigged! It's totally rigged!"
"I'm afraid it can't be helped," Giovanni said, a weary smile playing on his lips. "After all, your tactics are simply too dirty, too underhanded, and have absolutely no bottom line." He gestured towards the waiting final challenger. "Please, try to defeat your opponent in a fair and square manner. How about it?"
"Fine by me." Rekka stepped forward, hands clasped behind his back, and calmly took the Aetherium Coin from Stelle's hand.
"By the way," Giovanni's voice called out, laced with amusement, "there won't be a crit bonus for using all common Aether Spirits this time."
"So that mechanic really does exist!" March 7th exclaimed.
"Of course," Giovanni confirmed. "Hasn't Mr. Rekka already figured out the underlying mechanics of this game?"
'Now,'Giovanni thought,'Rekka should finally be forced to play normally…'
Ten minutes later, little Hook was witnessing the true meaning of human malice.
Her formidable team of eight Aether Spirits, including four powerful Overlords, was being systematically dismantled by a bizarre combination centered around an Automaton Spider and a 1-HP survival strategy. Crucially, Rekka still didn't have a single Overlord-type on his side.
The Automaton Spider—one of the most common Aether Spirits available. A single hit granted it a one-time invincibility shield. It was a simple unit, often overlooked.
The strategy was devilish. Rekka was using an expansion chip that, upon taking a fatal blow, would leave his Aether Spirit alive with exactly one hit point and immediately advance its turn. This was meant to be a desperate, last-ditch comeback component.
But Rekka, in a flash of wicked inspiration, had paired it with the Automaton Spider's shield. His Spirits would survive an apocalypse at 1 HP, then immediately put up an invincibility shield, ready to strike back.
"You were hiding this move, too?" Even March 7th was shocked. "That's so dirty."
"This isn't right!" Hook finally managed to stammer out, her small finger pointing accusingly at the little mechanical spider on the field. "How could the team of Pitch-Dark Hook the Great be defeated by a roadside Aether Spirit like this?!"
"Hook, do you know what your problem is?" Rekka asked, walking over to the pouting child.
"You… you used a hack!" she declared.
"Didn't you use a hack, too?" Stelle pointed out.
"But our hack was just to unlock the full Archive for viewing," March 7th defended. "Hook straight up changed the rules of the tournament."
Giovanni sighed. He couldn't really fault someone for using a cheat just to look at a collection log.
The lineup Rekka had just used could be assembled by any rookie player. And now, he had started to bamboozle Hook completely.
He began spouting nonsense about the importance of bonds with one's Aether Spirits, about not focusing on stats, and how every team needed a soul. He told her she needed to learn signature moves and that when she was about to lose, she had to shout, "I don't want to lose! This is my struggle!" He completely mesmerized the little girl with his gamer gospel.
"Mm-hmm! Hook understands now!" she declared, her eyes shining with newfound determination. She looked up at him, full of gratitude.
"Thank you, Big Brother Dan Heng!"
Rekka froze. "Hook, look closely. Do I look like Dan Heng?"
Hook stared intently at Rekka's face, then seemed to recall something. "Mm-hmm! Did you go dye your hair?"
'Does this kid really recognize people just by their hair color?' Rekka thought, utterly baffled.
"Fine," he sighed, deciding to just roll with it. "Then I am Dan Heng. Remember, Hook, if anyone asks you how you learned to play games in the future, just tell them Dan Heng taught you."
"Oh! Got it!" Hook nodded happily.
"Achoo!"
Back on the Astral Express, Dan Heng suddenly sneezed.
Strange. Why did he have the distinct feeling that someone was plotting against him?
"Dan Heng, did you catch a cold?" March 7th asked from across the parlor car.
"No." He rubbed the tip of his nose again. "I just suddenly felt…"
"Felt what?"
"Nothing."
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