Chapter 182: Meatball: Granny Yukari~ Granny Yukari~
"What is this?"
Haruto stared, perplexed, at the missile-shaped object he had just reeled in. Beside him, Marisa and Reimu exchanged equally baffled glances, neither having ever seen anything like it.
Only the well-traveled Yakumo Ran recognized the object for what it was. Her breath hitched, and she nearly stumbled, her lovely peach-blossom eyes widening into perfect circles of disbelief.
A small nuclear bomb?
No way... you can even catch something like this while fishing?
Her thoughts spun into chaos as she saw Reimu heft her Yin-Yang Orb, a glint of destructive curiosity in her eyes as if she were about to give the thing a good whack just to see what would happen. A primal wave of panic shot through Ran, and her fur nearly stood on end.
"Wait! Wait!" she yelped, lunging forward.
With a desperate snatch, she seized the miniature nuke from their grasp.
It wasn't that Yakumo Ran feared the bomb's power for herself; she was confident she could shield herself from the blast and instantly teleport the other three to safety. The problem was their location. This was the Sunflower Field.
Even a small nuclear device would have a blast radius of several kilometers. If it detonated here, at least half of the sprawling golden sea would be vaporized. When that happened, as the only one present who could remotely be considered a "guardian" youkai, she knew that Lady Yuuka would absolutely, unequivocally not let her off the hook.
Gulp...
A cold sweat beaded on her brow. The realization of how narrowly she had just brushed past the gates of hell sent a tremor through her. She had almost paid a personal visit to King Yama.
"Don't tell me this is a nuclear bomb," Haruto said, his expression turning strange as he watched Ran's face cycle through various shades of blue and white.
Yakumo Ran could only nod, her throat too tight for words.
Upon receiving confirmation, Haruto's gaze flickered from the bomb in Ran's hands to the fishing rod still in his own. A slow, utterly shameless grin spread across his face.
He knew it.
This fishing rod was definitely a treasure.
This was a nuclear bomb, after all. And a small one at that. Who knew what kind of bigger, more impressive "fish" he might catch later? This was fantastic! He no longer had to spend his days scheming to get his hands on his sister Yukari's private collection.
A fresh surge of energy coursed through him. Haruto immediately thrust the fishing rod into Marisa's hands, repeatedly urging her to guard it with her life.
Although Marisa and Reimu weren't entirely clear on what a "nuclear bomb" was, the sheer panic on Ran's face told them it was something they shouldn't mess with. Still, Reimu couldn't help but ask, "Is this thing... like a bomb?"
Haruto pointed at the device cradled in Ran's arms. "Just that little thing has the same power as one of Yuuka's casual strikes. If you had accidentally set it off just now, every sunflower within a three or four-kilometer radius would have been obliterated."
"...What!?"
Reimu froze, the color draining from her face. A few seconds later, her eyes shot wide with horror. Three or four kilometers might be less than half the full expanse of the Sunflower Field, but even if they had destroyed a single one of its precious flowers, they would have had to bury themselves in the dirt as an apology.
The reality of the situation finally hit Marisa, and her own delicate face turned pale. "I almost... I almost kicked the bucket again."
"Ran, give the nuke to me," Haruto said, holding out a hand.
Yakumo Ran shook her head vehemently, tucking the warhead protectively into the fluff of one of her nine tails. "No, this is too dangerous."
"How is it dangerous?" Haruto argued. "Isn't it just like one of Yuuka's casual Magic Cannons? It's not like I don't have her talisman cards for things like that."
Still, Ran refused. "It's not a matter of raw power. The radiation left behind after the explosion is incredibly difficult to clean up. Lady Yukari would surely blame me when the time comes."
"I'm not going to use it in Gensokyo," Haruto said, leaning in closer. "Do you really think I'd set it off like a firework for fun?"
Unexpectedly, his words only seemed to heighten her panic. She was genuinely terrified that Lord Haruto might, on a whim, do exactly that.
Before she could protest further, Haruto had already begun reaching into the soft fur of her tail, searching for the hidden device. A full-body shiver ran through her at the contact, and her body trembled intermittently as his fingers brushed against her.
In the end, defeated, Yakumo Ran surrendered the nuclear warhead. A deep blush crept up her neck, painting her exquisite face and the very tips of her fox ears a delicate shade of pink, lending her an intoxicating charm.
"Lord Haruto," she pleaded, "you must remember that you absolutely, absolutely cannot fire this at Lady Yukari!"
"I know, I know," Haruto waved a dismissive hand.
After casually tossing the nuclear bomb into a Gap set to a remote, empty coordinate, he returned to Marisa and Reimu's side. He found a respectable pile of fish already flopping on the shore, two of which were even larger than the ones he had caught himself.
Unfortunately, there were no more "surprises" like the miniature nuke.
Haruto surveyed the bounty on the ground, then glanced at the four of them. He turned and called out to his caretaker, "Ran, could you please go and invite some people over?"
"Should I invite Lady Yuuka?" she asked, a hint of confusion in her voice.
At the mere mention of Kazami Yuuka's name, both Marisa and Reimu instinctively flinched, shrinking their necks.
"Yuuka definitely needs to be called," Haruto declared. "And call anyone else you can think of. Since we've caught so many fish, we might as well have a proper banquet."
"Shouldn't we... ask for Lady Yuuka's opinion first?" Yakumo Ran suggested weakly. The Sunflower Field was Lady Yuuka's territory, after all. A mere fox youkai like herself had no authority to make such decisions.
"That works too," Haruto nodded. "Then go ahead. If she agrees, start calling the others right away."
"Mm-hmm, go on, and come back quickly."
Yakumo Yukari sat primly by a grill that had appeared from nowhere, delicately picking up a piece of sizzling beef and placing it in her mouth. She cupped her cheeks with both hands, her purple eyes narrowing in pure bliss. "Delicious!"
"Wait, when did you get here?" Haruto couldn't help but complain.
"Just now," Yukari replied, swallowing the beef with perfect nonchalance. "Since you all can't possibly finish everything anyway, I decided to come out and reluctantly help you eat a few bites to prevent waste."
Haruto desperately wanted to retort with, "Have you no shame?" but decided it was a waste of breath. He turned around, only to find Yakumo Ran still standing there, looking utterly lost. He couldn't help but feel confused.
"What's wrong?"
"Um... Lord Haruto, how about you go and ask her personally?" Ran's face was an open book, her expression screaming 'I'm a coward'and'Please, I'm begging you.'
"...Fine." Seeing her pitiable state, Haruto relented.
As they walked towards the Dream Mansion, Haruto offered some casual words of comfort. "You know, Yuuka is actually quite gentle. She likes lively atmospheres. Even if you asked her yourself, she would most likely agree."
Yakumo Ran only managed a weak, noncommittal sound in response.
Even so, her heart was still pounding with fear. When facing Lady Yuuka, she was, ultimately, just a little fox youkai. This kind of task was best left to Lord Haruto. Even if Lady Yuuka refused, she wouldn't do anything to him...
"Okay."
"...I haven't even finished speaking yet." Haruto stared with a subtle expression at Kazami Yuuka, who hadn't even bothered to look up from her book. He had only just opened his mouth, for crying out loud.
Beside him, Yakumo Ran's tails drooped nearly to the floor, her beautiful eyes wide with disbelief. She knew things would go more smoothly if Lord Haruto did the talking, but she hadn't expected it to be this smooth. Lady Yuuka had agreed without even hearing the request.
"What does it matter whether you finish or not?" Kazami Yuuka closed the manga in her hand and quietly looked up at him. "You know I would have agreed in the end anyway."
"What if I was going to make a very excessive request?"
The faintest glimmer of amusement danced in her crimson eyes, and the corner of her lips tilted into a slow, challenging smile.
"An excessive request? What kind of excessive request could you possibly make?"
Looking at her 'I dare you' expression, Haruto really wanted to give a few examples on the spot, but the words died in his throat.
Fine, he admitted defeat.
His Ran couldn't protect him from her. If Yuuka really decided to fire a Magic Cannon at him, his small body wouldn't be able to take it. He'd likely be checking into Eientei for a ten-day, half-month stay.
After getting Kazami Yuuka's consent, Yakumo Ran immediately departed to various corners of Gensokyo to summon guests for the banquet. Haruto, meanwhile, began the walk back to the secret hut with Yuuka.
Walking under the shade of her signature parasol, Haruto hummed a little tune, his gaze occasionally lingering on Yuuka. He would sometimes hold up his hands, as if taking a measurement.
"What is it?" Kazami Yuuka asked, seemingly possessing eyes in the back of her head. Though she was looking straight ahead, she had noticed his peculiar movements.
"I was thinking about whether to make a hat for you," Haruto answered honestly.
"A hat?" A trace of confusion entered her crimson eyes. "Why did you suddenly think of making me a hat?"
"Because I saw that everyone else has one. I was thinking of making one for myself, so I figured I'd make one for you while I'm at it. What color do you want?" Haruto simply skipped the "Do you want one?" part and went straight to the details.
"Green, I suppose."
"...How about a different color?" Haruto's expression became a bit strained. Seeing Yuuka's questioning look, he quickly suggested, "How about white? I feel like white would suit you very well."
Kazami Yuuka considered it for a moment, then nodded gently.
When the two of them returned to the secret hut, a lively crowd had already gathered. In addition to Reimu, Marisa, and Yakumo Yukari, Yuyuko and Youmu had also arrived.
Yuyuko had stationed herself by the grill, her eyes fixed longingly on the meat sizzling over the flames. Every time Youmu finished grilling a skewer, she would snatch it up and devour it in a single bite.
And... "Huh?"
When Haruto spotted Shameimaru Aya, he initially thought Ran had been incredibly fast in inviting people from Youkai Mountain. But a quick scan revealed that the only one from the mountain present was the infamous paparazzi tengu.
"Why are you the only one here?"
"This reporter was just passing by!"
The crow-like wings on Aya's back gave a single, powerful flap, and she instantly appeared before Haruto. Her speed was so immense that he didn't even have time to react, only perceiving her as a gust of wind.
"Could you accept an intervi—"
Aya's voice trailed off as she felt a certain crimson gaze lock onto her with unnerving intensity. She silently tucked away the Bunbunmaru Newspaper in her hand and forced a slightly awkward smile.
"Sorry to bother you."
With those words, she bolted away just as quickly as she had appeared.
"Your intimidation factor is really something," Haruto couldn't help but comment. If he had been alone, the paparazzi tengu would probably have pestered him for half the day.
"As long as your strength is sufficient, then—"
"Come on, let's go over there and grab some food."
Haruto unhesitatingly took her cool, pale hand and started walking towards where Yukari and Yuyuko were gathered.
Kazami Yuuka's brow twitched slightly at the sudden contact, but she didn't pull away, allowing the boy to lead her to the grill and guide her onto a low wooden stool.
Seeing this scene, even Yuyuko, who typically valued food above all else, couldn't help but let her thin lips part slightly, letting out a long, drawn-out "Ooooh..."
Click, click—
Not far away, Shameimaru Aya was frantically snapping photos. Once she returned from this banquet, she would immediately compile and print them.
Imagining the glorious scene of the Bunbunmaru Newspaper selling out and her becoming the number one reporter in Gensokyo, Aya couldn't help but break into a brilliant smile. She was so lost in her fantasy that she completely failed to notice the dark-faced Great Tengu, Iizunamaru Megumu, standing right behind her...
As time passed, more and more people arrived. The number of grills expanded from one to five, and the demand for food grew exponentially. This left Marisa and Reimu with no choice but to miserably continue their fishing duties.
Of course, listening to the praise and compliments from the surrounding tengu and fairies, the two of them fished with renewed, almost manic enthusiasm.
But Haruto's mood wasn't quite as cheerful. He had just been dragged into a Gap by his dear sister Yukari for a "friendly exchange."
The reason was simple.
That little pink meatball he'd brought back had suddenly acted up. Someone had discovered the creature and curiously asked what it was. Although Haruto had already released a few of them into the wild, it hadn't been long, and many of the youkai present were homebodies who hadn't encountered them yet.
Only Rinnosuke squatted silently in a corner, having fallen into a state of deep emo.
At that moment, Yakumo Yukari had pushed through the crowd, explaining with a face full of pride that this was a creature from another world. Its strength was comparable to a Fuzzy Ball, but its greatest trait was that it would say nice things whenever it met someone.
However, she hadn't expected what happened next. Just as the words left her lips, the pink meatball, under the horrified gazes of the crowd, chirped at her— "Old Woman."
While Yukari was still reeling, she leaned in closer, wondering if she had misheard. But in the next moment, the pink meatball asked in its sweet, childish voice, "Old Woman, Old Woman~ I'm so hungry, can I have something to eat?"
The crowd was dead silent. Only Kazami Yuuka burst out laughing on the spot, a clear, ringing sound that made Yukari so furious she wanted to humanely destroy the Cute Meatball then and there.
Haruto had gone through all sorts of trouble to save this special, outspoken meatball, and in the end, he and Kaguya had borne the brunt of Yukari's wrath.
After the two were finally released from the Gap, they silently hid in a secluded corner.
"Why did you drag me into this?" Kaguya muttered, her eyes dark with dissatisfaction.
"Just tell me, were you or were you not the one who brought it back with me?" Haruto shot back, not a hint of a blush on his face or a flutter in his heart.
If he could reasonably drag someone in to share the heat, why wouldn't he?
---
Meanwhile, in the outside world—
Su Ning peeled off her cosplay outfit, stretched her arms high above her head, and let out a long sigh of relief.
"Only one set left. I didn't expect this Young Master to be so kind; the punishment is so light. Should I take some extra nice photos to tempt the kid?"
Of course, she was just talking big. If she really had to pose for those truly lewd cosplay sets, she would still chicken out.
Humming a little tune, Su Ning opened the last costume box. As she looked at the final outfit inside, she fell into deep thought. She had breezed through the previous sets without any pressure, but this one...
Ding-dong—
Haruto's phone chimed with a notification. It wasn't just his; Kaguya's phone rang at the same moment.
The two of them tapped their screens. Su Ning's private chat window had popped up at the top of their list.
Haruto clicked into it and saw several cosplay photos. The effect was excellent; not only were the costumes accurate to the characters, but Su Ning's own racial traits added a unique charm, making the photos even more eye-catching than the original character art.
But when Haruto swiped to the sixth photo, he froze. He quickly scrolled back up, glanced at Kaguya, then at the clear blue sky, and then, tentatively and cautiously, scrolled back down...
Um...
Haruto clearly remembered that before leaving, he had taken back that one set of clothes with pitifully little fabric. He hadn't left it for her, intending to find an opportunity to let Kaguya try it on herself.
But he hadn't expected that Kaguya had actually chosen more than one such set at the time.
The fabric of this new set was actually okay, not quite as exaggerated as the other one. But because Su Ning was... well-endowed, and when combined with her natural allure—or perhaps she had simply misinterpreted the character—she was striking poses that were overflowing with temptation.
Just then, Youmu happened to come over, carrying a platter of freshly grilled food. Curious, she leaned in to see what Lord Haruto was looking at so intently.
Her pupils instantly shrank to pinpricks, and her innocent, childish face turned a shade of crimson so deep it looked like it might start steaming.
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