Her snoring just stops after a while and she suddenly starts making desperate gasps for air like she had just been dangerously choked.
I hear her footsteps frantically moving across the room, and then the sound of water running. Accompanied by retching and gargling.
"Why. . . why can't you just leave me alone?" She shouts in a sobbing manner. "How much longer are you going to be a stain on me?" Her voice comes out low and cracked this time.
She is crying bitterly now. Her cries might as well just become a poisoned dagger.
Gasoline and match because it is tearing me apart, burning me with overwhelming guilt. 'I am sorry. I am very sorry.' I can say it in my mind, but then why can't I fucking say it aloud so she would hear?
Would she even want to see let alone forgive me? Just why, why did I have I to be so bad to her? We both would not be here right now if not for all of that. Is there a knife in here?
