I've always known God was real, and she is one bored deity. I suppose I can understand on some level. When you've been in existence for 53,201 years (I know because she makes me celebrate her birthday) life gets fairly monotonous. My kingdom calls her Celestine. I call her Cel...or 'pain in my ass'.
Let me start by saying I utterly hate religion. In my kingdom of Lavarr the 'church' rules. Sure, we have a monarchy and I'm sure those guys are decent, but it's really a bunch of old men and women in long classically white robes that run the show. There's a council of ten, five men and five women, that sit at the long table upon a risen dais, and a whole slew of underlings happily doing their bidding. Currently I have the misfortune of being below said dais under their very judgmental stares. What could have landed me hear you ask? Cel. It's Cel's fault, damn her.
I guess I should explain a little. I grew up in the countryside with a modestly wealthy family. I have a standard family structure. Father, Mother, older brother, older sister, and me the youngest. We have never been close. Oh, they all got along famously. It was me they didn't like. The reason for that? Cel's been talking to me since before I can remember.
At first they thought I had an imaginary friend and didn't pay much mind to it. She talked to me all the time. What did she tell me? Normal stuff really at the beginning. She talked about her day, told me about something she saw while watching over Lavarr. Most of the time I never mentioned my conversations with my family. Who wants to hear about Berta the bread seller flirting with Bart the neighbor? I didn't, but Cel didn't have anyone else apparently. It was when I turned 15 that things really started to change. I guess she thought I was old enough to start my grand destiny. The first prophecy I ever heard was my own. The second was for my father.
I walked into my father's office one warm afternoon. It was a fairly large space, bookshelves lined two walls and floor to ceiling windows looked over our backyard. He was sitting behind his large desk. Papers littered the surface, and he had a large ledger open. Father looked up when I entered with surprise on his face. It was unusual for me to seek out any of my family.
"Yes?" He questioned, a little abrupt.
I sighed, but didn't say anything.
He lifted an eyebrow.
Would you just tell him? Cel's voice in my head.
I grumbled, exhaled, "In a month you will have two choices. Left or right. Left will lead to great riches, and right will lead to great happiness. The choice is yours."
The man was speechless.
I stood there rocking on my heels for a minute before I spoke again, "That's it. I'm going to head to the music room now."
I went to turn to leave quickly, but my father spoke up, "What the hell are you talking about?"
A sigh escaped my lips, and quietly, "Cel told me I had to tell you..."
"Cel!" he barked angrily, "Cel isn't real! We've been over this before...!"
I hung my head. It was the same old line. Cel wasn't real. It was all in my head. Honestly I think the only reason they haven't sent me to a sanitorium is it would hurt their reputation, "I know," I lied, "but if I didn't tell you she wouldn't be quiet," Truth was she threatened to sing a terrible rendition of The Farmer's ten daughters on repeat if I didn't. I shuddered at the thought.
"I don't want to hear another word about the voice in your head again! If anyone were to find out we'd be the laughing stock of the community!" His voice boomed throughout the room. Honestly, if he didn't want it to get out he should probably lower his voice.
I nodded slowly, not saying another word.
He jerked his head towards the door and I quickly made my escape.
Now that wasn't so bad was it? Cel's melodic voice rang in my ear. It reminded my of wind moving the the forest after a good rain. Don't know why.
"Ugh, I love getting yelled at by my understanding father. Made my day. Why did you have me tell him something so obscure and ludicrous anyway? It isn't going to make him think I'm less crazy."
She laughed, I can't tell you that yet. There are rules.
The corner of my mouth lifted in a smirk, "Aren't you God?"
There are still rules. If I don't do things a...certain way things can go badly.
"Whatever you say great one. I'm going to the music room to practice my violin. Anything else you need me to proclaim beforehand?"
Not yet. One step at a time.
"Well, that's not ominous," I muttered. Headed to the one place I ever felt calm and comfortable.
A month later my father left for a business trip to the capital. I don't actually know the details of what happened, because they never tell me anything, but the way he looked at me when he got back was unsettling. He started to ask me about what I'd said over the dinner table one night, but thought better of it.