FLASHBACK
Later—
Jay sits quietly while the others move around.
Talking.
Arguing.
Laughing.
Normal.
Too normal.
Her eyes follow them.
One by one.
Luna.
Cora.
Daniel.
Alex.
Ethan.
Different.
All of them.
But somehow—
Together.
Her chest tightens slightly.
Not panic.
Not fear.
Just…
Something else.
Something unfamiliar.
"…you're staring again," Daniel says.
Jay blinks. "I'm observing."
"That's creepy."
"You're creepy."
"Thank you."
"That wasn't a compliment."
"I'll take it."
Cora sighs. "Ignore him."
"I am."
"You're literally talking to him."
"…unfortunately."
Daniel grins. "She likes me."
"I really don't."
"Denial."
"Reality."
And for a second—
Just a second—
Jay forgets to be afraid.
The room is louder today.
Not chaotic.
Just… alive.
Jay sits at the table, her fingers lightly tapping against the surface without her realizing it.
Tap.
Tap.
Tap.
"Are you sending a secret code?" Daniel asks.
Her fingers stop immediately.
"No."
"Because if you are, it's not very secret."
"I wasn't."
"Could've fooled me."
She exhales. "Do you ever stop talking?"
"No."
"Of course you don't."
Cora mutters, "We've tried."
"Rude," Daniel says.
"Accurate," Cora replies.
Jay almost smiles again.
Almost.
Ethan notices.
Of course he does.
He's sitting across from her, not saying anything, just watching the small shifts in her expression.
He doesn't point it out.
Doesn't make it a moment.
Just lets it happen.
That helps.
More than it should.
"Alright," Alex's voice cuts in.
Calm.
Steady.
The room quiets slightly.
Not forced.
Just natural.
"We need to go over tonight."
Jay's fingers stop completely.
Tonight?
Her shoulders stiffen.
Not obvious.
But enough.
Ethan sees it.
Of course he does.
"Simple run," Alex continues. "In and out. No complications."
"That's what you said last time," Daniel mutters.
"And we were fine."
"Barely."
"We were still fine."
"That's debatable."
"Daniel."
"Okay, I'm quiet."
He's not.
But quieter.
Jay's eyes move between them.
"Run?" she asks.
The word feels strange in her mouth.
Not running away.
Something else.
Cora glances at her. "Work."
"What kind of work?"
"Not the kind you need to worry about," Cora replies.
Immediate.
Closed.
Jay's jaw tightens slightly.
"I can decide what I worry about."
"And I can decide what you're involved in."
Tension.
Small.
Sharp.
Jay holds her gaze.
Doesn't back down.
Doesn't look away.
For a second—
Too long.
Then—
"Enough," Ethan says quietly.
Not loud.
But it cuts through.
Cora exhales, looking away.
Jay's shoulders drop slightly.
Not relief.
Just… less pressure.
"You're not going," Ethan adds.
Jay looks at him.
"Why not?"
"Because you're not ready."
"I can walk."
"That's not the point."
"Then what is?"
He holds her gaze.
Steady.
Calm.
"The point is," he says, "you don't need to be there."
Something in her chest tightens.
Again.
"I didn't say I needed to," she replies.
"You didn't have to."
Silence.
He understands.
Too much.
She hates that.
"Then what do I do?" she asks.
The question slips out before she can stop it.
What do I do.
It sounds…
wrong.
Like she's asking for permission.
Like she used to.
Her expression hardens slightly.
"I mean—I don't need to—"
"Stay," Luna says gently.
Jay pauses.
Luna smiles softly. "Just stay. Rest."
Rest.
That word feels unfamiliar.
Dangerous.
But—
Not wrong.
Jay looks away.
"…fine."
Later—
The room is quieter again.
Not empty.
Just… slower.
Cora and Alex are gone.
Daniel is somewhere else—probably talking to himself.
Luna is organizing something near the shelves.
Jay sits by the window.
Her eyes follow the light.
It shifts slowly across the floor.
Time passing.
Normal.
Too normal.
"You're thinking again," Ethan says.
She doesn't look at him.
"No, I'm not."
"You are."
"I'm not."
"You are."
"I'm observing."
"That's thinking."
"It's different."
"Not really."
She exhales softly.
"…you're annoying."
"I've been told."
"Multiple times?"
"Mostly by you."
"Good."
He sits beside her.
Not too close.
Just enough.
The space between them isn't tense anymore.
Not like before.
It's… quiet.
Comfortable.
She notices that.
Doesn't say it.
"Why do you stay so calm?" she asks suddenly.
The question surprises even her.
Ethan glances at her.
"Practice."
"With what?"
"Everything."
"That's not an answer."
"It is."
She frowns slightly.
"…that's a bad answer."
He almost smiles.
"Maybe."
Silence again.
But it lingers longer this time.
Not awkward.
Just… there.
Jay's fingers tap lightly against her knee now.
Slower.
Less restless.
"You can ask," Ethan says.
She stiffens slightly. "Ask what?"
"Whatever you're thinking."
"I'm not thinking anything."
"You are."
"I'm not."
"You are."
"I'm not—"
She stops.
Because—
He's right.
Again.
"…what kind of work is it?" she asks quietly.
There it is.
The real question.
Ethan leans back slightly.
Thinking.
Not avoiding.
Just choosing his words.
"We deal with people," he says.
"What kind of people?"
"The kind that cause problems."
"That's vague."
"It's supposed to be."
She looks at him.
"…is it dangerous?"
A pause.
Then—
"Yes."
Simple.
Honest.
No sugarcoating.
Jay's fingers stop moving.
Her chest tightens slightly.
Not fear.
Not fully.
Just… awareness.
"And you just… do that?" she asks.
"Yeah."
"Why?"
Another pause.
Then—
"Because someone has to."
She looks away.
That answer feels heavy.
Too heavy.
But also—
Real.
"What about you?" he asks.
Her head turns slightly. "What about me?"
"Why did you run?"
The question hits.
Hard.
Fast.
Unexpected.
Her body reacts instantly.
Her shoulders tense.
Her fingers curl.
Her breathing shifts.
"I didn't run," she says.
Too fast.
Too sharp.
Lie.
Obvious.
Ethan doesn't push.
Doesn't repeat it.
Just watches.
Waiting.
She hates that.
The waiting.
The silence.
The space where she could say something—
But doesn't.
"I just left," she adds.
Softer now.
Still a lie.
Just a quieter one.
He nods once.
Like that's enough.
Like he doesn't need more.
That—
That helps.
More than it should.
"You don't have to tell me," he says.
She exhales slowly.
"…I know."
And she does.
That's the difference.
No one is forcing her.
No one is demanding answers.
No one is—
Her thoughts stop.
Because suddenly—
She realizes something.
She's still here.
She didn't leave.
She didn't run.
She didn't—
Her chest tightens slightly.
Not panic.
Not fear.
Just… something unfamiliar.
Something that feels like—
Staying.
"You should rest," Ethan says.
She nods slightly.
But doesn't move.
Neither does he.
They just sit there.
Watching the light shift across the floor.
Time passing.
Quiet.
Steady.
Safe—
No.
Not safe.
But…
Not dangerous.
And for now—
That's enough.
The light moves slowly across the floor.
Jay watches it.
She doesn't realize how long she's been staring until it reaches the edge of her shoe.
Then she blinks.
Shifts slightly.
The room feels… still.
Not empty.
Just calm.
Luna is somewhere behind her, moving things quietly. The soft sound of objects being placed, adjusted, moved again—it fills the silence without breaking it.
Ethan is still beside her.
He hasn't said anything for a while.
That's new.
Most people fill silence.
He doesn't.
Jay exhales slowly.
"…you're not going?" she asks.
Her voice is softer now.
Not guarded.
Just… quiet.
"Not yet," he replies.
A small pause.
"Why?"
He doesn't answer immediately.
Then—
"Did you want me to?"
Jay looks at him.
For a second—
Too long.
"No," she says.
Honest.
Before she can stop it.
Ethan nods once.
Like that's enough.
And somehow—
It is.
Her fingers rest on her knee.
Not tapping this time.
Just… still.
That's different.
She notices it.
Doesn't comment on it.
Her eyes drift back to the window.
Outside, the sky looks normal.
Too normal.
People probably walking somewhere.
Talking.
Living.
Like nothing ever happens.
Like nothing can happen.
Her chest tightens slightly.
Not pain.
Just… a quiet pressure.
"You're thinking again," Ethan says.
She doesn't react this time.
"…maybe," she admits.
"That's progress."
She almost smiles.
Almost.
A few seconds pass.
Or maybe more.
Time feels slower here.
Less sharp.
"…what happens if something goes wrong?" she asks.
The question comes out quietly.
Carefully.
Like she's testing how it sounds.
Ethan leans forward slightly, resting his arms on his knees.
"During a run?"
She nods.
He thinks for a moment.
Then—
"We adjust."
"That's it?"
"No," he says. "But it's where we start."
She frowns slightly.
"That sounds risky."
"It is."
"You still do it."
"Yeah."
"Why?"
He glances at her.
"Because not doing it is worse."
That answer sits there.
Heavy.
But not overwhelming.
Just… real.
Jay looks down at her hands.
Her fingers curl slightly.
Then relax.
"…and no one gets hurt?" she asks.
The question slips out before she can stop it.
Ethan pauses.
This time—
Longer.
Then—
"Sometimes they do."
Her breath catches slightly.
Just for a second.
She doesn't look at him.
Doesn't move.
"…and you're okay with that?"
"No," he says quietly.
Another pause.
"But we accept the risk."
Jay's jaw tightens slightly.
Accept the risk.
That feels familiar.
Too familiar.
But different.
Here—it sounds like a choice.
Not something forced on her.
That difference matters.
Even if she doesn't fully understand why.
Luna walks past them, placing something on the table.
"You should eat something later," she says gently.
Jay nods slightly.
"I will."
Not a lie.
Not this time.
Luna smiles a little, then moves away again.
No pressure.
No watching.
Just… a suggestion.
Jay exhales slowly.
"…she's nice," she says.
Ethan glances at Luna, then back at Jay.
"Yeah."
"She doesn't ask questions."
"She knows when not to."
Jay nods faintly.
That makes sense.
Silence returns.
But it's not heavy.
Not tense.
Just… there.
Jay leans back slightly, resting her head against the wall.
Her eyes close.
Just for a second.
She listens.
No shouting.
No footsteps rushing.
No doors slamming.
Nothing sudden.
Nothing sharp.
Her shoulders relax.
Just a little.
Then—
Footsteps.
Jay's eyes open instantly.
Her body tenses.
Automatically.
The sound gets closer.
Her fingers curl slightly again.
Her breathing shifts.
Small.
But enough.
Ethan notices.
Of course he does.
"It's just Daniel," he says.
Her body doesn't relax immediately.
It takes a second.
Then—
Another.
The footsteps stop.
"…why does everyone sound so serious in this place?" Daniel's voice comes.
Jay exhales quietly.
Her shoulders drop again.
Just a little.
"You're back early," Ethan says.
"Yeah, because apparently I'm 'not helpful,'" Daniel replies, air quoting dramatically.
"That sounds accurate," Cora's voice comes from behind him.
"I heard that."
"Good."
Jay watches them.
The tension in her chest fades slowly.
Not gone.
But less.
Her fingers loosen again.
Daniel drops into a chair dramatically. "I'm exhausted."
"You didn't do anything," Cora says.
"I did emotional support."
"You complained."
"That is emotional support."
"It's really not."
Jay watches the exchange.
Her lips twitch slightly.
Just a little.
Daniel notices.
Of course he does.
"See?" he points at her. "She gets it."
"I don't," Jay replies.
"You smiled."
"I didn't."
"You did."
"It was a face movement."
"That's called smiling."
"It wasn't intentional."
"That makes it better."
Jay shakes her head slightly.
"…you're strange."
"I prefer unique."
"No, definitely strange."
"Rude."