A week after Heaven's surprise invasion-turned-epic-fail-turned-banishment, all the Overlords get into the designated War Room in the palace once more - the War Meetings are a daily thing, and they've always lasted all day before.
It's honestly borderline terrifying, how many plans have been made and either discarded or put in the 'absolutely using' pile - Calliope Liliana Peverell, it's become horrifyingly clear, has been in wars before and not as a simple soldier. Because there's a giant map of the entirety of Hell on a massive board, another map of just Pentagram City, and an active countdown for the Warding she did up around Heaven - they have about a month, give or take, and the explanation she gave as to why the Warding is only going to last that long left everyone wondering how she's even alive.
Heaven and Hell's opposing energies are usually constantly clashing in the airspace around Heaven - hence why it always looks like it's on fire, as well as why nobody who's ever tried to fly up to the place has ever returned, they died in agony from being purified and corrupted at the same time - and her Warding has separated the two and is slowly being eaten away at both sides as a result…plus however much people up in Heaven are trying to break through on their own power.
And, the woman herself?
Not dead on her feet anymore - none of the Overlords bar Alastor have any idea on why that is, and Alastor isn't talking - but still in full-general mode. She isn't wasting a single second on anything, no filter for any of her responses…some of which have gotten some very concerned looks from Emily and Charlie.
Like the idea to have Mammon spin a massive web over Pentagram City, and Vox turn it into a massive bug-zapper-esque trap via the city's electrical grid.
And her casual declaration that she could animate a few 'Acromantula-sized spider replicas' to help with the web-making.
Or her idea to glamour some of Alastor's summonable puppets as bait to lead however many Angels fall for it into a small swarm of the things and get ripped apart.
The question of how much Rosie's Cannibals can eat and how much did they enjoy the aftermath of the failed Extermination Day made Zestial go about five shades paler for some reason, and a few of the Sins buried their faces in their hands while muttering about 'not missing this version of her.'
This woman just does not stop, apparently, and that realization comes hand-in-hand with the one saying she'd be the worst possible enemy for literally anyone to make. So, whoever this Sera is, she's unleashed a Hell-sized shitshow for herself, one with glowing green eyes and hair that looks like it's on fire at the ends.
There's also the detail that they can all feel her magic in the entire building, far stronger than at the Hotel from what Vox and Velvette remember - if the two of them had to guess, woefully ignorant about magic as they've realized they are, it's because whatever she used to set up defenses for the palace has been in place for so much longer. They could feel the energy in the air over at the Hotel, but nothing too much. Here, it's practically suffocating, not unlike when she paid a visit to the Studio - and, according to Lucifer, the Wards she put up ten thousand years ago are fucking dormant.
Not active.
Not in any state of alertness.
Haven't been actively recharged in the past century and a half, and haven't been used for even longer.
They've just soaked and settled into the entire building, to the point that successfully breaking through them would damage probably the entire structure. Something the Wards on the Hotel simply haven't had the time to do, yet. Vox doesn't want to try and imagine what it would be like under them if they were activated, this constant pressure and feeling of always being watched is bad enough - he's also discontinuing the line of Drones, he's decided.
He's decided he absolutely hates the feeling of his every move down to which way he turns his head being monitored, even if the woman so clearly has far bigger things on her mind than one Overlord she can get rid of so easily.
At least there's really good food?
Food all the Hellborn, Lucifer, Lilith, Charlotte, Emily, and even Alastor and Rosie flock to at once every single time they all take a break.
Vox and Velvette have the unfortunate gut feeling Calliope made all that food…and it's apparently really good if everyone else's reactions are anything to go by.
Calliope, Lucifer, Lilith, Charlie, Alastor, Rosie, Stolas, and Frederick Von Eldritch have all gathered at the corner of the war table - Calliope and Alastor sitting side-by-side and swinging their legs together, much to Vox's disbelief for a split second when he saw it, Alastor only ever did that when he felt relaxed enough to drop his guard around his current company - and are all eating or drinking various snacks while conversing.
Walking over with a cup of water in hand, Vox asks ""Question…how much time do we actually have to put these strategy plans in place? You said we have a month, give or take, but…"
Calli shrugs with one shoulder, and says "More, if I go up and reinforce the Warding around Heaven. We've blocked all magical transport in and out of Hell for the time being…hope any Hellborn up on Earth can find somewhere to stay until this blows over, because we couldn't take the risk Sera would muster everyone on Earth and open a portal from there either." Any Hellborn up on Earth will have Asmodean Crystals…so, they should be alright.
Probably.
Hopefully.
So long as they keep their heads down, keep their disguises up, and act normal until they can get back to Hell.
Lucifer quickly clears his throat as soon as he sees the expression forming on Calli's face, and says "You going up there to reinforce the Warding time and again would keep you permanently exhausted, it's a no."
Rosie hums, and asks "What about how you kept all my Cannibals from getting injured in the last Extermination Day? It worked rather well then."
Lilith sucks in a sharp breath through her teeth, asking "Come again? You did what, Calli? How did you deal with all the injuries they would've taken?"
Lucifer looks like he's just been punched in the gut, realization settling in about something Vox hasn't got a clue about. "Calli," the blonde man too-calmly says, "what happened to all those injuries? You said you can't just make something vanish into thin air, it has to be either moved or turned into something else."
Now it's Alastor's turn to stare at her in dawning realization, even as Vox slowly connects the dots - too slowly, though, too slowly to understand just what they're realizing.
There would've been hundreds of injuries, if not a few thousand easily, but everyone walked away without so much as a scratch thanks to some kind of…Warding, they called it. They've just stated she would've had to move all those injuries somewhere else…or to someone. But, if it were her, they would've noticed all those injuries, her healing rate can't be that good…right?
"Calli," Alastor says, smile too tight and looking like he wants to grab her and shake her, "how, exactly, did that reservoir you made work?" Because she never said, not specifically. And he was so focused on the upcoming battle that he just took the easy access to more magic to use without digging into how she made it work in the first place.
Vox sees the expression flicker over her face, the briefest moment of panic - she's been caught, he's just not sure how.
Frederick Von Eldritch sets his glass down on the table, his own power starting to arc off him…and then Calli's phone rings, breaking the tension. Calli digs it out of her back pocket, taking another mouthful of her drink as she does.
Lucifer crosses his arms, saying "Unless that's my father or one of the four of them, Calli, do not answer that call." And, yes, he means that. He'll go full King of Hell on her if that's what it takes - he has his depressive times, where everything seems like one giant abyss trying to swallow him whole...but he's never been as bad as he's come to know Calli can get.
Even if she'll play it off as it being practical, or using an advantage they have due to her immortality.
Calli hisses something at him, giving him an eyeroll, and then opens the screen to see who's calling - and promptly chokes on the mouthful of liquid as it goes into her lungs instead of down her throat.
Lucifer pounds her on the back, and she manages to breathe again after about ten seconds. Wiping away the tears running down her face, she rasps out "Gotta take this, Luce. It's your father." She even turns the phone around to show a single letter for the contact info - G.
Now it's Lucifer's turn to sputter in shock, even as Calli hits the call button.
Frederick watches as she moves to about a foot away from the group, and then runs a hand down his face before muttering "Saved by the bell…literally."
Vox frowns, even as Alastor downs his drink like it's a shot glass, and asks "What do you mean?"
"Calli's the type to weaponize anything and everything necessary to get something done or keep someone safe. Including her own inability to die."
Lucifer flatly says "I watched her take a spear through the heart that day, and then she just ripped it out without so much as flinching…after saying she barely felt it. Alastor, you said something about a reservoir?"
Alastor nods, looking furious as he does - clearly putting everything together long after the fact - and says "She said it would act as a backup source of magic for me to use in the fight…she never said how, exactly, it would fill back up, though." He should've asked, should've figured it out during the fight with Eve when large amounts of power would fill it…it turned her pain into power for him to use.
So of-fucking-course she would transfer all those injuries to herself during the battle.
Vox eventually figures it out, disbelief and embarrassment simultaneously flooding him - as impossible as it sounds that someone is capable of just taking everyone else's injuries…he has a TV for a head, Alastor has deer ears and antlers, and he's currently in a room with the top few tiers of Hell with ten-thousand years' worth of magic weighing down on everyone via dormant Wards that could make his head explode.
Impossible went out the door when he woke up down here…which means it took him an embarrassingly long time to figure out what literally everyone who knows this woman well clocked as soon as the theory was voiced.
"G," Calli says, "where are you and do you know what's going on? Have you listened to the voicemails I've left you?" Nobody's been able to find this guy in literal millennia, she only has his number because Azrael got it out of Sera at some point, and the most they've been able to do is Calli or Azrael stumbling across some near-vanished trace of him in a completely random spot while on duty.
And now…he's just calling her straight out of the blue?!
"Hello? Is that…Calliope, right? Long time, no see, as I've heard these humans say. How've things been?"
Calli feels her eye twitch a bit, and blinks a few times to make it stop, then pinches the bridge of her nose before saying "Interesting, let's leave it at that. A few questions for you…where are you, where have you been, and do you know what the fuck Sera's been doing with you gone?!" Calli doesn't need to turn around to know pretty much the entire room is staring at her, attempt to keep her voice down or no.
"Where am I? I've been exploring the world. It's really amazing, how far humans have come so soon. Is Adam still around with…whatshername, his wife…"
Lilith crosses her arms as Calli keeps talking into her phone, and mutters "The infamous Luck Curse strikes again. I'll contact Azrael and Leonardo, Lucifer, can you think of some way to get in touch with one of your brothers without Sera finding out?"
Lucifer nods, pulling his own phone out…right up until Calli's voice flatly asks "What do you mean 'Who's Lilith?' The first woman, who was originally meant to be that idiot Adam's wife until he backhanded her for telling him no! That's who!" She runs a hand through her hair, asking "Am I- of course I'm sure, I was there! Saw the whole thing, took Lilith back to my place and got her face fixed up! Yes, Eve came after, no I'm not sure how much longer after. But Lilith has been happily married to Lucifer for the past ten millennia!"
She hears something else on the phone, and then gives Lucifer a 'you absolutely have to be kidding me, this can't be serious' look and says "G, for the love of- where are you?! Right now, where are you?!"
Vox doesn't hear what's said, but the plastic solo cup slips right out of her hand as her expression changes yet again. "Ha-wee-w - excuse me, but do you mean Hawaii?! You've spent the past ten millennia and a century getting a tan, dodging volcano eruptions, going to Luau's, and lounging on a beach chair with a Pina Colada or two-thousand?!"
Vox so wishes he'd first met this woman in literally any circumstances other than her beating Valentino to a paste because he threatened Charlotte Morningstar in private and she picked up on it - her sarcasm, he's discovered, is hilarious. There's also the tiny little detail that her magic can and will make electronics explode when not shielded, to.
"G, listen really close, alright? I'm going to turn this into a video call, you are going to accept, I'm portaling over there, and you are going to start giving me some answers. Starting with why you left Heaven in the first place, and why you left Sera of all people in charge up there." She hits a button on her phone, then hands it to Lucifer after a moment and then gestures like she's opening two massive doors…and rips open a portal to a beautiful beach.
There's a figure sitting on a beach chair there, taller than half the room with ease and only dwarfed by most of the Sins when they're purposefully towering over everyone else. No eyes on his - her? Their? - face, but four of them floating around the head. They've got a mouth, though, which is about the only distinguishable feature on their entire head since the rest of their face is unnervingly blank underneath the large hat with a wide brim they're wearing.
"Mom's Luck Curse strikes again," Vox hears a voice quietly say, and when he turns to look it's the young woman who looks like a mix of Alastor and Calliope. Emily, he thinks she was called back at the Hotel.
Charlie leans over to her, asking "Anything really strange happen to you lately, Em? Anything at all?"
"I mean…there was the time with the flying silverware, how I kept managing to get them all clumped together and they'd land in the jars? I can't think of anything in particular, though…"
Vox feels his system short-circuit for a moment, panic overriding several routines - he may not know the specific details about this 'Luck Curse' they're talking about, but if that's what was responsible for the sheer amount of near-miss and extremely unlikely events that happened while they were cleaning that kitchen…two of them will either cancel each other out or level all of Hell.
And he's willing to bet it's going to be more along the lines of 'level Hell' - fuck, but no wonder Alastor likes this woman so much! Powerful, intelligent, ruthless, chaos just seems to spawn from her very presence so he'd never get bored, she's a fantastic fucking cook - which certainly explains his reaction to him not eating her food - and there's the near-certainty that she'll never ask him to update himself to more modern technology given the detail that her magic makes it all explode.
If he had to objectively describe an ideal partner for Alastor…fuck, she'd be it. And there's no possible way she's a gold-digger, or only in it for his power, she's stronger than he is.
He'd say it's too good to be true, that there has to be some flaw with her, there has to be something she does that gets on his nerves…but he gets the feeling he's already seen it and Alastor's well-versed in dealing with it.
The way she'll drive herself to exhaustion, perhaps?
How she makes absolutely zero attempts to mask her emotions like he knows for a fact Alastor does nearly all the time?
Of course, she's dragging literal God through a portal by the lower arm and sitting him in a chair, so there's that. Sheer off-the-charts strength the likes of which no regular Sinner can even hope to compete with is nothing to sneeze at, after all.
"G," Calli snaps, "I've been all over Earth a few dozen times, there's no possible way you've been on Hawaii all this time. Especially considering Hawaii didn't exist way back when. Where in the world-"
She cuts off suddenly, leaning forward slightly with an expression like she's focusing on something - until, suddenly, she hisses something and fires off a spell that hits God square in the chest. He lights up bright golden, but with jet black streaking down his body from his head like it's trying to swallow it all up.
Calli makes a strangled sound in the back of her throat, Lilith right alongside her, Charlie, Emily, and Via gasp, most of the others in the room start muttering amongst themselves…and Lucifer just looks frozen in place. Calli doesn't waste a second, moving the tables to the far walls before magically etching a circle in the ground surrounded by Runes nobody else seems to understand.
And then, because of course she does, she cuts her own wrist to star bleeding, making bright red blood spurt out of her arm even as she downs some liquid from a red bottle with a black stopper.
"Oh, what the hell," Velvette breathes out as the blood pools in the groves she just made in the floor - Vox finds himself in agreement after a minute, how the heck does one tiny little woman have this much blood?! And how is she not passed out on the floor already?!
It's when she bites her wrist to keep the injury open and starts painting on his face, after the entire series of runes and the circle - an actual magic Rune Circle?! - is filled with blood that Vox finds himself dragged away from the room. When he looks at the hand clamped around his upper arm, he sees it's…Alastor.
Blinking a few times, Vox asks "Al?" This is the first time Alastor's let him within ten feet of him, he's kept at least three people between the two of them at all times up until right now.
Once upon a time, they were attached at the hip, he'd let Vox closer than pretty much anyone other than Rosie.
Once upon a time, Valentino hadn't been in Vox's life, with sickly-sweet words and Venom, the Pheromones he'd thought himself immune to due to being more than a little bit machine making their way into his system and making him drop his guard.
"Time for you to go," Alastor says, grabbing at the door handle, "unless, of course, you want your head to explode. Who knows, might be entertaining - except we still need you around for the city-wide Angel-Zapper plan to work."
Vox promptly finds himself practically thrown outside the door, Alastor closing it before he can even get a word out.
Vox frowns to himself, shaking his head - what would he even say to Alastor? 'I know I royally fucked things up between us, but I think that might've happened because Valentino was drugging me without me noticing via his Pheromones before he ever made a move on me with his Venom' - yeah, he can see how that would go.
Alastor would either laugh in his face or throw him out and tell him to never speak to him again with a healthy dose of 'I fucking told you so' heaped on top.