The isekai native just called your flip phone outdated—and showed you her smartphone.
Natsuki Subaru's brain short-circuited for a good while.
Smartphones existed in his world, of course. But due to the price gap and the completely different interface, they hadn't caught on widely in his era. Still, Subaru was at least familiar with them.
Subaru grabbed Yimi's phone and started exploring the new-generation interface. "What isekai native? You're obviously from Japan, just like me! Even the language settings are the same!"
He couldn't even afford one of these! Dammit—and here he was being looked down on as the country bumpkin!
"No, wait—those cat ears are a hundred percent real. Could it be soul transmigration? No, that doesn't work either. You're clearly an actual child. Can children get transmigrated too?"
Subaru checked the nearly full battery, then pointed at the name of an app for Yimi to read. "What does this say?"
"Angry Birds," Yimi answered honestly.
It was a game that came preloaded on the phone. She'd never opened it—she'd left too quickly, and Origami hadn't had time to teach her how to play.
"You're OBVIOUSLY transmigrated! No wonder you're so strong for your age!"
"Transmigrated?"
"It's when you die and come back to life in a different body." Subaru explained, thinking that the smartphone probably couldn't be charged here, so he resisted the urge to try Angry Birds.
Yimi was not happy. "I didn't die. I've always, been a cat."
Even though she looked like a person right now.
She snatched her phone back. "Give it back. Origami, gave this to me. Real phone."
Don't break it.
"Someone gave it to you?" Only after hearing that did Subaru calm down.
Right—besides Yimi being a transmigrator herself, she could have simply encountered one. The transmigrator could have taught her the other world's language and given her a phone.
Subaru coughed twice to reset his composure. "Where is this person who gave you the phone now?"
"Another world."
"Already went back? And Diego has a tool that can cross between worlds, so you want to see that person again—that's why you need the treasure. Am I right?" Subaru felt like he'd cracked the whole mystery.
He looked down at his phone. The trade offer he'd planned was starting to make him feel inadequate.
He'd come running to Yimi in a panic, but now that he'd cooled down, he realized Yimi was clearly afraid of "Diego" too. So the man's strength might exceed even hers—expecting this child to protect him was unrealistic.
Subaru still couldn't sort it all out. To learn what came next, he needed to survive tonight first. But how could he just leave the girl he'd fallen for behind in this dangerous place?
He placed a hand on Yimi's shoulder. "Do you remember what the plants that can repel Diego look like?"
"There's green peppers, cherry tomatoes…" Yimi counted on her fingers.
"Those all sound pretty ordinary." Subaru didn't quite follow. Were these things rare in another world? Or was she describing something that merely resembled them?
"Anyway, I'll check the nearby village and see if I can find any. Thanks, Yimi-chan!"
Easy to say, but he doubted it would work. He couldn't imagine someone with half a brain leaving items near his own home that could be used against him.
"Yimi-chan?" Yimi tilted her head, mulling the name over.
Back in school, other classmates used to call her that. Madoka sometimes called her that too.
After Subaru left, Beatrice emerged from behind the bushes where she'd been eavesdropping and walked up to Yimi, looking thoroughly unimpressed. "He still hasn't apologized to you."
"Oh. ⊙o⊙"
Unable to make heads or tails of their conversation from her hiding spot, Beatrice figured that from the look of things, Yimi hadn't understood half of what Subaru was saying either. He'd just barreled through his own monologue without a care. What an arrogant fellow.
"Honestly, you give off the impression that anyone could trick you with a piece of candy." Beatrice reached over to pinch Yimi's tail again. "I've been wondering about this—what's going on with your tail? It goes stiff every now and then."
"Hm? Dunno." Yimi pinched her own tail too, noticing the issue for the first time.
Was the tail messing with her on purpose?
White light burst from Yimi's palm as she flung the anomaly away, treating it as misfortune.
…
At that exact moment, Natsuki Subaru—walking out of Roswaal Manor alone—suddenly went rigid. He froze in place for several seconds.
Then he collapsed to the ground, clutching his chest and gasping.
"What just happened?"
He couldn't move? What was that?
He didn't understand, but for a moment he'd been completely paralyzed—locked in a posture that should've been impossible to maintain.
A curse of some kind? A side effect of Return by Death?
Nobody was behind him. Must be his own problem.
With a heavy heart, Subaru arrived safely at the nearby village.
Roswaal was a lord, sure, but he also held the title of Margrave. Even so, the village right next to his estate was still just a small settlement.
"Take this—oh, sorry!"
There was no shortage of rowdy kids, though. A mud-caked boy crashed straight into him, smearing his clothes.
"Hey, what's the big idea?! This outfit is a limited edition where I come from!"
Subaru put on a dramatic show of outrage, scraped a clump of dried mud off his shirt, and hurled it at the boy. "If you think a simple 'sorry' gets you off the hook, you're dreaming! Stand right there and take my Special Beam Cannon!"
"Only an idiot would stand still for that—eat this!" Another mud ball smacked Subaru in the face.
A third boy chimed in with visible conflict. "Playing with mud—Petra's going to hate us, isn't she?"
Just like that, he'd hit it off with the village kids.
That was just the kind of energetic person he was. Or rather—ever since the day he'd realized he was no longer exceptional, he'd started deliberately maintaining this persona. In his old classmates' words: a weirdo.
The mud dried to a crust on his clothes—the kind of mess that would've earned him a smack from his mother on sight. What made it worse was that the kids wore short sleeves while he was in a tracksuit.
After burning through their energy, they all sat down together.
"You want green peppers? My backyard's got some. I can dig one up for you—just don't let my mom find out."
"Really? You're a lifesaver."
"You obviously just don't want to eat your peppers." Another boy called out his friend.
The benefits of roughhousing with brats—sure, he'd been covered in mud until he was unrecognizable, but the catharsis had done wonders for his mood. And thanks to these little terrors, he'd gotten the plant he needed without spending a single coin.
If the situation weren't so dire, bringing Emilia here for a date would've been perfect.
Subaru washed his hands and cupped the green pepper plant.
"Does this thing actually work? Sounds about as reliable as 'vampires fear garlic.'"
Bidding the kids farewell, Subaru headed back toward Roswaal Manor. Near the village entrance, he spotted a blue-haired little girl and an orange-haired girl using catnip to play with the village's free-roaming cats.
"Hey there, girls." Subaru waved at them.
"Mud monster!" The orange-haired girl quickly pulled the blue-haired girl back.
Subaru waved frantically. "Don't be scared, don't be scared—I'm not some creepy uncle, I swear. Is that catnip you've got? Could you tell me where you picked it?"
Yimi had mentioned cat grass earlier. He'd grab some catnip for her on the way back.
————
Sniff sniff~
This world's catnip had a lovely aroma. A distinctive fragrance—the perfect change of pace from the catnip she'd grown tired of.
"Mew mew mew~"
Yimi curled up on the ground hugging a fistful of catnip, tail swishing back and forth, her voice noticeably cuter than usual.
"This is clearly abnormal! What did you bring back?!" Beatrice bent down to pull her up and found she could barely budge the girl.
"As long as you like it. There's a whole bunch on the north side of the village. I got bitten by a dog picking it, too." Subaru brushed a dry mud flake off himself and produced the green pepper plant. "Can this ward off Diego?"
"Should, work?" Yimi reluctantly let Beatrice drag her upright.
She had plenty of complaints about Subaru showing up caked in mud, but the catnip earned her full approval.
She glanced at the utterly useless Tome of Wisdom in her Storage Space. Fair's fair—she handed it over to Subaru. "This is, for you."
"You're just casually giving away a book Mother left behind, to this shady *** of unknown origin…" Beatrice's eye twitched.
"Don't go slapping *** labels on people! I'm devoted to Emilia-tan and Emilia-tan alone!" Subaru took the book—which bore a striking resemblance to the Witch Cult's Gospel—and studied it. "Come to think of it, you were holding this earlier. What is this book?"
「Congratulations, Host! Achievement unlocked: [By Imperial Decree, We Appoint Thee Sin Archbishop of Greed]. Reward: 5% portal energy.」