The silence doesn't feel as bad now. Still there. Still noticeable. But not suffocating. Just… present. Like something waiting.
I shift slightly on the couch, becoming very aware of how close we actually are. Not touching. But close enough that I can feel it. That space. That tension.
"So…" I start, then immediately regret it because I have no idea where I was going with that.
Smooth, Arlo. Really smooth.
Lucifer glances at me, a faint hint of amusement in his eyes.
"You came all the way here," he says. "You must have had something in mind."
"I—" I stop. "I wanted answers." "You got them." "…Yeah."
Another pause. God. Why is this still so hard? I take a breath. Then another. "Can I ask something else?"
Lucifer nods once. "You can ask anything."
That shouldn't make my heart react like that. But it does. "Your profile," I say slowly. "On SwipeRight."
His expression shifts slightly. Not defensive. Just… attentive.
"You said you're a 'late bloomer.'"
"I did."
I hesitate. Then just say it. "…Does that mean what I think it means?"
There's a brief silence. Lucifer leans back slightly, studying me. Then.
"Yes." No hesitation. No embarrassment. Just… honesty.
My heart stutters. I don't know why that surprises me. I mean, I read it. But hearing it out loud? Feels different. More real.
"I haven't…" he pauses, just slightly. "Done anything. Not really." The way he says it is calm. But there's something underneath. Something careful. Something… vulnerable.
And suddenly, I feel it too. That same kind of exposure. That same risk. My fingers fidget slightly in my lap.
"…Me neither," I admit. The words come out quieter than I expected. Lucifer stills. Just for a second. Then his gaze shifts back to me, slower this time.
"…I thought so."
My head snaps up. "What?" A small pause. Then. "You don't act like someone who has," he says simply.
My face burns instantly. "Oh my god."
"I don't mean that badly," he adds, a hint of amusement slipping in. "That's worse," I mutter, covering my face with one hand.
I hear it then. A quiet, low laugh. Not teasing. Not mocking. Just… real.
And for some reason. That makes me peek through my fingers. Lucifer's looking at me differently now. Softer. Warmer. Like something's shifted. Like we're not on opposite sides anymore. Like we're, on the same level.
The realization hits slowly. Two people. Both inexperienced. Both unsure. Both pretending to be more okay than they actually are.
"…Thisis kind of ridiculous," I mumble. Lucifer tilts his head slightly. "How so?" I gesture vaguely between us. "We're both just… guessing what we're doing."
A pause. Then. "Yes," he says. Simple. Honest. And somehow, comforting.
The space between us feels smaller now. Not physically. But… something's changed. I don't feel like running anymore. I don't feel like I need to escape. I just. Feel.
My hand shifts slightly on the couch. Closer to his. Not on purpose.Just… there. And for a second. I forget to move it away.
Lucifer notices. Of course he does. His gaze drops briefly. To the space between our hands. Then back to me. Slowly. Questioning. Waiting. Not pushing.
My breath catches slightly. Because this. This feels bigger than it should. It's just a hand. Just space. Just nothing. And yet. It feels like everything.
I swallow. Don't move. Neither does he. And the moment stretches. Quiet. Tense. Soft.
Dangerous.