Conceptually
I'm not myself
Or—
Not only just
Idealized sure
The best we see
But also you
Those close to me
Contained within
Almost wholly
Those who I miss
And I forget
They still remain
Absence a hue
Turning me blue
I still love you
Anarchic
Flow without borders
Make your roads
Coalesce freely at the heart
Sharing of each others' selves
Streaming outward once again
Return to root or journey high
Or stay steady at the core
Universal life lights that still strive
In shards I split my ego toward
A self where one and all are more
I turn inside out
Freeing myself
Disturbing myself
I turn strange and liquid
Beautiful and irreversibly
Changed like a lightbulb
Nothing of myself remaining
Yet continuity coats me
An oozing soothing static
Reassurance of the temporal
Regression that aches
Yet once out of this valley
Progress awaits
Your monster is a waterfall
Breathing fire in the dark
Diving with defiant screams
Breaking apart in cruel science
Divinity dissolving into strings
Lights and energy and control
Collapsing castles yielding
To forms inside revealed
Remembrance of the once-whole
Retained awareness
Independent at last
An author struggles
Another makes strides
Dancing toward a state of being
Becoming living melody
Twisting self to set of strings
A car a song a phone a soul
Everything everywhere all at once
To everywhere it seems to reach
Becomes the waves the straits
The rainbow darkness
As it strains toward light
The telephone rings
It's the first day of spring
My blind eyes open wide
Energy flows kind water goes
It's nothing like a church's rows
Entwining guiding lights
Running right back
Where we were
Releasing something fell
A fate
A chorus
Changed enough
To part red seas
My superstar
It's where we are
You're not just the phantom feeling
Crooked phalange, pale obsession
You're more than the marks you make
Invisible writing on the walls of life
You're more than the simple sum
Than a stack of experience and karma
Your whole is more
A divinity of precious things
Memory and essence
Love and loss
Dao
This is the circle given life
This is the corridor to night
This is the door to the other side
This is the time to do what's right
Those who slay us
We'll hold them too
Until they stop
No one deserves this
Not even us
So we untie the hypocrisy
The knot at our core
The belief of unkindness
When directed inward
Is unworthy of us
Heart a shining silver sun
Luminous
I'll guide you back
Through veils, past monsters
Despite angels who scorn
And demons that broke my stride
I always have to try
Glittering memory compels me
To stay gone you'll have to end me
Distant echoes of purpose demand
I will follow you
I do it all the time
Clamping down on pain
Enveloped in the numb
Swallowed by the sound
Guiding us to last resorts
We spin around each other
Circling out of harmony
Bring up your spirit
Hold my heart
Let it smolder against yours
Let it set you free to feel
This is not the end
Refuse to annihilate
Don't give in to hate
Straining minds deep inside
They make me war for what is kind
My conscious voice sends up the love
Cultivates the rest
Guiding strands, no bad patterns
Only neglected thoughts
Stemming from need and hurt
We love them all
These parts of self
It overflows
The path to you
Why would I leave you
When my heart it beats so loud
Where would I spend this
My fire I set
To save our dreams
To save the love
For you for you for everyone
Why would I not listen
If I fail to understand
I still I swear would dare to try
Bit by bit I'll push towards light
You have my splintered heart
Held together by ashen faith
You can wish of me the very worst
Frame me in any way
You can repay the hurt
The sadness inside
But I'm guided by my soul
And I'll never let go
Memories of you in my dreams
Always
Pay some attention to the hues
The colors of my heart and mind
And even more, the soul beside
Sensation swirling cold around me
Yet inside I know a fire waits
A burning thing that needs release
To rejoin the pact of you and me
To bind the threads eternally
To send to you the best of me
From glittering ashes
Dark phoenixes rise
Taking wing for the fight
Against heartless unkind
Memory echoes sharply
Explosive aftermaths remind
A new sort of order
With angels more aligned
Strange degrees
Separate both you and me
Parallels intersecting
On a one-way track now
Lost ones found anew
First soul's touch that thaws
The frost that aches torn far away
Light from your eyes
In the same world as mine
Colliding fractions of potential
Perfection in moments
Open, I feel your call
Sail away, sail away
Sail away thusly; with alacrity too
I don't want to keep you, see
Don't want you to burn
Your ship's gotta goal, yeah
Don't let me keep it from return
Sending you off with a fervent desire
To reach what you need
And get what you're after
You got this, new friends
Stay safe
Guided by grace ever falling
Into the pit of devotion
Tower thrown sparks
As the sea's dredged for ashes
Lighting up motion in systems half-broken
Screw loose and heavy with emotion
A spirit I held for a moment
I'll treasure the time
Forever I swear it
The music sublime
A night not to lose it
Jaws collapse with each step
Cold echoes of a cold open
Paws printing invisible entropy
Dao followed by many and yet-
It's a path we follow
All alone
Together
I'm shadow walking
Lurking in the liminalities
I'm shadow talking
I'm silent stalking
I'm monster, knocking
Four times death check
Are you breathing
Four times death check
Light won't leave thee
A glint spears down
So slight
And
Omnipresent darkness
Finds itself
Seen
Moonlight burning through
The rough edges beside me
Blank-patterned false-faced
Emptiness and nothingness
Sunlight glossy in my chest
Splintered shards of personality
A color riot learning to exist
Everything I am from others
I want to sail on wings of hope
Yet the fire spreads
Breaking through my contraptions
Bursting demolition
Missed connection caused distraction
And I lost us
They're still burning though
Starlight passing in the night
We're part of the web still
We weave ourselves some still
It has to be different.
Facing antithesis
Harmony ringing shrilly
Rapidly shifting
Properties and personality
Bleeding away, blending together
Emotion and memory
Stinging, changing, blurring
Synthesis as colors flash
Ground down in reaction
Interconnected enigma
Grid is infected
System crash
All waking up now
Who am I