chin with the back of his sleeve, the empty skewer stick twirling between his fingers like a mini baton. The nine-tailed fox—now officially christened "Ninebro" after a quick system-assisted naming session—curled contentedly around his neck like the world's fluffiest scarf. Its golden fur shimmered under the afternoon sun, and every time Ling Qinghe took a step, the fox's tails swished in perfect sync, like it was keeping beat to an invisible gaming soundtrack.
"Bro, this place is straight-up cheat-code beautiful," he muttered, blue eyes scanning the bustling village square. "But zero ramen shops? Criminal. We need to fix that ASAP."
Ping!
System: Side quest unlocked, Host.
Title: "First Impressions Are Overpowered."
Objective: Impress at least one big-shot cultivator without revealing your trash-tier F-rank stats.
Reward: One limited-edition Spicy Ghost Pepper Ramen (cultivation +1 temporary boost, zero diarrhea).
Fail: Your beauty SSS-rank aura reverses for 48 hours—everyone thinks you're an ugly goblin.
Time limit: Before sunset. Don't choke, bro.
Ling Qinghe grinned so wide his porcelain cheeks dimpled. "Challenge accepted. Ninebro, you're my hype man today."
The square was packed. Banners fluttered overhead—Azure Cloud Sect Recruitment Drive. Young cultivators in colorful robes lined up in front of a massive stone platform where an old elder with a beard longer than Ling Qinghe's future ramen supply sat cross-legged, looking bored out of his ancient mind. A glowing crystal pillar stood in the center: the infamous "Talent Tester." One punch or one qi pulse, and it ranked you from Trash to Heaven's Chosen.
Ling Qinghe strolled right into the middle of the crowd like he owned the place. Whispers exploded instantly.
"Is that… a celestial maiden in disguise?"
"No, look at the jawline—definitely a young master from some hidden clan!"
"His hair… it's glowing. Is he using a divine technique or just naturally extra?"
Ninebro puffed its chest proudly, all nine tails fanning out like a golden peacock. One tail even booped a nearby girl's nose, making her squeak and blush.
The elder's eyes snapped open. He took one look at Ling Qinghe and actually sat up straighter. "Young friend, your… presence is quite remarkable. Step forward for the test."
Ling Qinghe gave a lazy salute. "Yo, Elder Bro! Happy to be here. Let's see if this body can actually throw hands."
He hopped onto the platform, rolled his shoulders, and cracked his neck like he was queuing for ranked matches. The crowd leaned in. Ninebro sat at his feet, tails wagging.
First up: strength test. Ling Qinghe wound up like a baseball pitcher and punched the crystal pillar with everything he had.
Thud.
The pillar didn't even flicker. A single sad "F-rank" rune floated up in glowing red letters.
Silence. Then snickers.
A tall guy with sharp eyebrows and robes that screamed "I have rich parents" stepped forward, arms crossed. "Pathetic. Even my dog has better qi. Who let this pretty boy waste our time?"
Ling Qinghe blinked. "Oof. Harsh, bro. But hey, at least your dog's got spirit. Mine's got nine tails and better drip."
The guy—clearly Young Master Something-or-Other—sneered. "That fox is obviously a stolen spirit beast from the Golden Tail Clan! Hand it over before I make you."
Ninebro's ears flattened. All nine tails ignited with golden flames. The fox let out a tiny, adorable growl that somehow shook the entire platform.
Young Master Bro's face went pale. "W-wait, that's—"
Too late. Ninebro launched like a furry missile, tackled the guy's face, and started aggressively nuzzling (and maybe lightly biting) his expensive hairdo. The crowd burst into laughter as the arrogant cultivator flailed around screaming, "Get this glorified scarf off me!"
Ling Qinghe doubled over, hands on knees, snow-white hair spilling everywhere. "Ninebro, no! We don't bully the NPCs—wait, actually, carry on. He started it."
The elder stroked his beard, eyes twinkling for the first time all day. "Interesting. The Nine-Tailed Golden Fox has chosen its master. Such a beast only bonds with those of extraordinary destiny… or extraordinary looks. Young friend, your cultivation is… unconventional, but your affinity is rare. The Azure Cloud Sect would be honored to accept you as an outer disciple. Temporary, of course. Until you prove yourself."
Ping!
System: Quest complete!
Reward delivered. Spicy Ghost Pepper Ramen x1 (hot and ready in your sleeve).
Bonus: Reputation +50 with local NPCs. They now think you're mysterious and cool instead of just pretty.
Ling Qinghe felt the warm cup materialize in his sleeve. He pulled it out right there on the platform, cracked it open, and took a victorious slurp while the crowd cheered like he'd just soloed a boss raid.
"Elder Bro, you're the real MVP," he said between noodles. "Outer disciple sounds perfect. Low pressure, high ramen potential."
Young Master Bro finally pried Ninebro off his head (now sporting several new bald spots) and stomped away muttering threats about "revenge" and "family backing." Ling Qinghe just waved cheerfully. "See you at sect, rival bro! Bring snacks!"
As the sun dipped lower, painting the bamboo forest gold, Ling Qinghe followed a junior disciple toward the Azure Cloud Sect's mountain path. Ninebro rode shotgun on his shoulder again, tails glowing softly. The spicy ramen burned just right in his stomach, and for the first time since waking up, he felt the faint hum of actual qi stirring inside his chest—like his trash stats were teasing an upgrade.
"Bro… second life is still undefeated," he whispered, blue eyes sparkling as petals from some unseen tree drifted down around them. "Sect life, here we come. Just don't let me die before I hit at least mid-rank ramen privileges."
Somewhere in his head, the system snickered.
System: Famous last words, Host. Try not to get adopted by the entire female population of the outer court on day one.
Ling Qinghe laughed loud enough to scare a flock of spirit birds.
"Wouldn't dream of it, bro. Wouldn't dream of it."
End of Chapter 3