On the deck of the Bruma Jackson, Rhett lounged lazily against the railing, holding a fresh navigation chart in his hand. On the map, a red dot marked "New Onigashima" stood out sharply. If you asked whether Rhett could read it — of course he could. He was the one who planned Roger's desperate race against time.
With Lena as his navigator, why was Rhett still looking at maps? Because leaning against the ship while studying a map made him look cool, baby.
"Captain, are you sure you don't need me to come?" Tesoro stood nearby, his brow furrowed. "Kaido is..."
"Enough." Rhett waved his hand without looking up. "Your only mission right now is to take care of Stella. If you let so much as a single hair fall from her head —" The blood mist suddenly formed a giant hand and squeezed Tesoro's head. "I'll melt you into a gold baby bottle. Just stay by her side and take good care of her. If anyone causes trouble, hit back hard."
Rhett knew there was a man in One Piece who regretted his choices for his entire life. With that warning in mind, Rhett wasn't going to let something like that happen.
No mistake — Rhett was talking about Senior Pink, the executive of the Donquixote family who wore baby clothes. That was one of Oda's better-written characters. Aside from not being there when his family needed him, he was leagues above Yasopp. Yasopp? Don't even mention him in the same breath.
Perona floated in the air, hugging her Kumashi plushie and snickering. "Lord Tesoro looks like a househusband now, doesn't he~"
"Kishishishi..." Moria's shadow emerged from the floor and twisted into a chibi Tesoro wearing an apron. "Do you need me to teach you how to prepare baby formula? I'm quite professional too."
Tesoro's temples bulged with veins. "You..."
"Alright." Rhett snapped his fingers. The blood mist dispersed. "Enel, Moria, get ready to set out."
"Huh? Captain, have you seen my navigation chart? I remember leaving it right here..." Lena's voice came from a distance.
Rhett vanished in an instant and reappeared just as quickly.
"I just saw it. It was by the helm."
"That can't be right, I just... Huh? It really is there~ Thank you, Captain!"
Lena stood at the helm. Her voice was no longer soft and timid, but deliberately controlled. "Zombies, listen up. Make our Bruma Jackson great again."
"ROAR!!!!!"
"Quiet down, you idiots! If you scare Rouge, I'll take you all apart!" Lena whispered harshly at the zombies.
Enel snorted coldly, tapping his gold trident against his shoulder. "Captain, you finally remember this god's usefulness?"
Rhett grinned. "Of course. I'm counting on your thunderclouds to clear the way this time." He turned to look at Stella, who was sunbathing on the deck. "Sister-in-law, any local specialties you want me to bring back from Onigashima?"
Stella shook her head gently. "Just come back safely, Lord Rhett." She touched her belly softly. "We'll be here waiting for everyone to come back and tell us their adventure stories."
The blood mist froze for a moment.
These were people who could make the seas tremble. But aside from Rhett, all of them looked a little embarrassed.
Rhett: They just haven't seen enough.
"...Yeah." x5
---
The Bruma Jackson slowly sailed into the harbor of New Onigashima. Blood mist swirled around the ship, forming a crimson barrier. Rhett stood at the bow, his crimson eyes narrowed as he surveyed the grim, foreboding island — a giant skull perched on the cliffside.
"Tch. Kaido's taste is still so morbid. Then again, a pirate crew living in a cave does make sense." Rhett clicked his tongue. "Enel, if things get messy, blast that stupid skull first."
Enel snorted, tapping his trident against his shoulder. "Captain, this god has hated that eyesore of an island for a long time. Just watch."
But when they actually set foot on New Onigashima, the battle they had expected never came. Rhett thought to himself that he would rather have fought.
"WAAAH—!!!"
A deafening wail suddenly came from inside the giant skull.
Then came a "CRASH!" The top of the skull shattered as if hit by an incredible force. Kaido's massive figure stumbled out, a giant sake gourd in his hand. His dragon horns were crooked. His face was bright red. Tears and snot covered his face.
"Rhett —!!! Is that really you?!"
Kaido burst into tears and charged straight at Rhett.
Rhett smiled. Interesting. Straight to the point. Come on! Fight!
Rhett charged toward Kaido as well. The distance between them grew shorter and shorter.
"Stab."
The Black Tide Greatsword sank in cleanly. It just went right in. Rhett had barely even coated it with Armament Haki.
Those who knew Rhett knew. Those who didn't, didn't.
The Black Tide Greatsword could be coated with Armament Haki, Conqueror's Haki, and also corrosive mist. He hadn't even used that yet.
Rhett: "???"
"THUD!!!"
Kaido wrapped his arms around Rhett. The impact slammed Rhett straight into the ground. Rhett was stunned. He hadn't seen this coming.
"Kaido, what the hell —" Rhett struggled to push him off, but Kaido only held on tighter. Tears streamed down his face.
"Waaah... Rhett... I'm so sad!!!"
Rhett: "..."
Enel: "..."
Moria: "...Kishishishi... What's going on here?"
Kaido cried like a three-hundred-pound baby. Between sobs, he patted Rhett on the back. "I just thought... waaah... that someday someone else will kill you... and I won't even have the strength to do it myself... How depressing is that?!"
Rhett: "????"
"Are you drunk?!" Rhett turned into mist and reappeared a few feet away, then kicked Kaido in the face, sending him stumbling back several meters. "I'm perfectly healthy! What are you mourning?!"
Kaido fell to the ground but still clutched his sake gourd, sniffling. "You don't understand... waaah... all I ever wanted was to beat you to death... but you just keep getting stronger... and now I can't even..."
Rhett: "..."
Enel: "..."
Moria: "...Kishishishi... Lord Kaido, you are very drunk."
Kaido suddenly looked up, his eyes full of tears. "Rhett... would you just let me kill you? Just once? I promise I'll go easy!"
Rhett: "..."
"GET LOST!!!"
The blood mist exploded. Rhett kicked Kaido, sending him flying into a distant cliff.
"CRASH—!!!"
The whole island shook. Kaido's body was embedded in the rock, but he was still sobbing. "Waaah... Rhett... you're so cruel..."
Rhett rubbed his temples and turned to look at King, Queen, and Jack. "Is your boss always like this?"
King: "..." (silently looked away)
Queen: "..." (pretended to check his mechanical arm)
Jack: "..." (looked down and counted his fingers)
Rhett: "..."
Rhett laughed. A person really does laugh when they're at a complete loss for words.
He turned to leave. But Kaido crawled out of the cliff and staggered after him. "Rhett!!! (heart-wrenching) Don't go! I haven't killed you yet!"
Rhett: "..."
"Enel. Blast him."
"BOOM—!!!"