Chapter 55: Orochimaru's Social Death Scene!
At this moment, on the roof of the Chunin Examsvenue in Konoha Village, the scene was somewhat eerie.
What should have been a scene of kidnapping the Third Hokage and a duel against a mentor had now become a situation where a group of people was ganging up on one.
Orochimaru stood alone in the center of the roof, his Kage Robe fluttering in the wind. At his feet was a pile of corpses; the Sound Four had just been instantly defeated by the female Ninjas and, out of fear, had fled for their lives.
Opposite him, Anko Mitarashi was excitedly licking a Kunai, Kurenai Yuhi held red Genjutsu flower petals between her fingertips, Tenten shouldered a massive scroll that was still steaming, and behind them even stood several Anbu who had appeared out of nowhere.
Of course, the most conspicuous was the Blonde Youth who had just come charging up in a frantic run.
[Wow, so this is one of the legendary Sannin? He looks a bit pathetic.]
Naruto squatted on the eaves of the roof. Although the surroundings were thick with killing intent, his leisurely attitude—as if watching a monkey show—was truly jarring.
[But his skin is quite slippery; Anko-sensei's Snake Swarm Feast just now only bit his substitution. This guy must be part loach.]
Just then, two crisp system notification tones, like post-battle settlements, rang out precisely in the minds of the two female Ninjas.
[Ding!]
[Tenten (Female): Congratulations! You have successfully passed the practical test of a new weapon in an artistic (physical) way. Naruto-kun is very satisfied with this firepower coverage.]
[Reward obtained: Space Ninjutsu Tool: Infinite Ammo Depot (Basic). Your summoning scrolls will automatically recycle and regenerate ordinary Ninja tools, saying goodbye to the predicament of having no money to buy Kunai.]
Tenten's eyes suddenly lit up, and she felt the scroll in her hand grow heavier, as if it were connected to a bottomless armory. In the future, let alone a Gatling, even performing a "Myriad Swords Returning to the Ancestor" as Naruto suggested would be no problem.
At the same time, the Cursed Seal on Anko's neck suddenly fluctuated violently like boiling water.
[Ding!]
[Anko Mitarashi (Female): Congratulations! You have converted your years of pent-up hatred for Orochimaru into the practical action of first devouring his subordinates. This wildness is highly appreciated by the LSP host.]
[Reward obtained: Full Cursed Seal Energy Absorption. The Cursed Seal of Heaven has been converted into your second Chakra battery. Pain eliminated, power retained.]
"Ha... Hahaha!"
Anko suddenly clutched her neck. The burning sensation that had tormented her constantly had disappeared, and a gentle yet massive surge of Sage Chakra emerged. Anko snapped her head up and stared fixedly at Orochimaru.
"Orochimaru-sensei... right now, I feel better than ever!"
Being stared at by a group of women with the eyes of a predator, even Orochimaru's eye corner twitched twice at this moment.
The Third Hokage, Hiruzen Sarutobi, was holding the Adamantine Staff, preparing to say something like "repent and be saved," but he was choked up before he could even open his mouth.
This atmosphere didn't look like a duel between master and student at all; it looked more like a wife bringing a group of sisters to catch a cheating husband...
"Hmph, do you think numbers are useful?"
Orochimaru snorted coldly, a trace of ruthlessness flashing in his snake-like pupils. Since the sneak attack plan failed, he would go for a frontal assault.
His hands quickly formed seals and slammed onto the roof tiles.
Ninjutsu: Edo Tensei.
Boom! Boom!
Two coffins marked "First" and "Second" rose from the ground, blocking everyone's path. The lids slid off, and two withered figures covered in cracks slowly walked out.
First Hokage Senju Hashirama, Second HokageSenju Tobirama.
"This is bad, it's Shodai-sama and Nidaime-sama." The Third Hokage's face changed drastically.
The surrounding Anbu were even more terrified, retreating several steps.
[Hoh, so this is the legendary God of Shinobi? They just look like two pieces of rotten wood.]
Naruto rubbed his chin with a look of disdain.
[What is the Old Man so afraid of? That First Hokage uses Wood Release, right? Don't you understand the Five Elements Mutual Restraint? What does wood fear? It fears fire! Use Anko-sensei's flaming ultimate move and Pervy Sage's Toad Oil! Just throw them at him! He's just a giant pile of firewood!]
Hearing this, Anko froze for a moment, then grinned. Right, whether it's a god or a ghost, isn't it just wood?
Naruto's gaze then shifted to the other one.
[As for that Second Hokage... he's just a squishy mage who plays with water.]
Naruto clicked his tongue inwardly.
[Everyone knows a mage is useless when closed in on. And this is an Edo Tensei body; it definitely isn't as tough as when he was alive. To deal with this kind of agility-type mage, you need wide-range physical heavy hits—smash him directly with rocks, ideally the kind of punch that can flip the earth's crust.]
Sakura Haruno, who was at the back of the crowd, had been somewhat immobilized by the Second Hokage's aura.
But hearing the words "physical heavy hits" and "flip the earth's crust," her Inner Sakura instantly took over her body.
[Squishy mage? So he's just a giant target, right?]
"Shatter... for me!"
With a feminine shout, Sakura didn't even use Ninjutsu. Instead, she crudely compressed Chakrainto her fist and charged recklessly at the Second Hokage, who was preparing to form seals for Water Release.
"Where did this little girl come from..." Orochimaruwas about to control Tobirama to dodge.
But he underestimated this early version of what was called Monstrous Strength.
Rumble!
Sakura's punch slammed directly into the roof beneath Tobirama's feet. The entire roof shattered instantly like a cracker, and countless massive stone fragments soared into the sky under the reaction force.
"Since I can't hit you, I'll just tear down your entire footing!"
Amidst the array of flying giant rocks, the Second Hokage's movements stiffened for a split second. In that instant, several explosive tag mixed in with the stones stuck to his body.
These were leftovers from Tenten's earlier strafing.
Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang!
Accompanied by a series of explosions, the dignified master of forbidden techniques, the Second Hokage, was blown into a sky full of paper scraps and fragments before he could even release an S-rank Water Release; he wouldn't be able to piece himself back together for a while.
"This..." For the first time, Orochimaru's expression couldn't hold up.
And the Third Hokage's mouth hung wide open; even his pipe almost fell to the ground. These are today's Genin? Is their fighting style this savage?
[Well done! Now that's Violence Aesthetics!]
Naruto cheered in his heart, then looked at the ugly-faced Orochimaru.
Orochimaru was now being forced back repeatedly by Anko and the arriving Anbu. He suddenly opened his mouth wide, and his signature long purple tongue extended out—unusually long—with the tongue wrapped around a sword: the kusanagi sword.
This should have been a very intimidating scene.
But Naruto's train of thought took a Thomas-style 360-degree drift at this moment.
[Eww... how disgusting. Such a long tongue, and it's covered in saliva...]
Naruto's gaze lingered on that flexible tongue for two seconds, and a strange yet vivid association popped up.
[This tongue can extend and retract freely, and it can even fork and bend... Could it be that his failed pursuit of Granny Tsunade in the past was because of this trick?]
[Think about it, if this tongue were used for... ahem, if it were used to provide a full-range cleaning service for a rich lady with a figure like Granny Tsunade... that scene is too beautiful, I don't dare look! Would it be so stimulating that Granny Tsunade would just punch him away?]
[Is this the truth behind why he was rejected by Tsunade? Because his tongue was too flexible, it seemed very lewd?]
Buzz—!
In this instant, a dead silence lasting three seconds fell over the entire rooftop battlefield.
Anko, Kurenai, Yūgao, Hinata, Sakura, Ino, and Tenten all shuddered, their expressions more vivid than the last.
Disgust, shock, shame, and a hint of being unable to look directly at such a mental image.
"Urgh..." Although Anko liked heavy tastes, hearing this kind of dirty joke directed at her former teacher and the legendary Sannin made her unable to resist dry-heaving.
Meanwhile, dozens of kilometers away on Tanzaku Street.
Tsunade, who was losing in the casino until her eyes were red, suddenly felt a shiver run through her body. An inexplicable chill made her almost crush the dice cup in her hand.
"Which bastard is badmouthing me behind my back... and it's that kind of... Ugh! How disgusting!"
[Ding! Detected an indescribable association regarding a legendary female Ninja. All-female favorability correction: Disdain +100, Tsunade's hatred value (?) locked.]
On the roof, although Orochimaru couldn't hear the inner voice, he keenly felt the change in the surrounding gazes.
Those eyes that were originally full of killing intent had suddenly turned into the eyes one uses to look at a pervert. Especially Anko; her gaze was as if she were looking at something filthy.
Orochimaru's face flushed slightly, feeling more uncomfortable than if he had been beaten up: "What kind of eyes are those?!"
Immediately, Anko, the Third Hokage, and all the surrounding Ninjas swarmed forward.
Various Ninjutsu were thrown at Orochimaru's pale face as if they cost nothing.
No matter how strong Orochimaru was, facing this kind of group beatdown that ignored all martial ethics, combined with his mental collapse, he finally couldn't hold on.
"These lunatics... when did Konoha become like this!"
Poof!
In desperation, he could only bite his finger to summon Manda, using the massive smoke and the screams of Manda being beaten as cover to transform into a small snake and burrow into the ground to escape in an extremely pathetic manner.
Let alone taking Sasuke away, he even felt that he had lost all his dignity for a lifetime today.
"We... we won?"
As Orochimaru's Chakra vanished, everyone present felt somewhat exhausted.
No one expected that the Konoha Crush plan, which was enough to destroy the Village, would end with such an absurd group brawl.
Standing on the eaves, Naruto was listening to the voice in his head with satisfaction.
[Ding! Assisted in repelling the powerful enemy Orochimaru and ensured the core leader of Konohadid not die.]
[Although the process was extremely improper, the result is perfect. Gained a large amount of experience points.]
[System Reward: Chakra limit +50% (Now you are a humanoid Tailed Beast).]
Naruto stretched, looking at the older sisters below whose clothes were slightly disheveled from overexertion, a smile curling at the corners of his mouth.
[This is the Konoha I want to protect... everyone is alive and kicking, how nice.]
This simple thought made the female Ninjas below, who originally wanted to complain about him, feel a slight warmth in their hearts. Although he's a perverted LSP, he's... barely a reliable pervert.