Chapter 44: Transform Before You Speak to Me!
"Pervy Sage! Watch closely!"
Using the recoil from kicking off the cliff wall just now, Naruto's body traced an arc in mid-air that defied the rules of physics. He bit his finger extremely quickly in the air, his hands moving so fast they were a blur of afterimages.
[Tch, although I'm being forced into this, since I'm going to perform a Summoning, I have to make a big scene. There's no hope for a cat-eared girl, and that damn fox refuses to transform either.]
[In that case, at least give me something majestic! Ideally, the kind that can smash right through the canyon below with one sit!]
"Boar—Dog—Bird—Monkey—Ram..."
"Summoning Jutsu!"
BOOM—!
In the originally empty canyon, it was as if a sudden clap of thunder had struck the ground. A massive cloud of white smoke rose like a mushroom cloud, obscuring the fading glow of the setting sun and instantly filling more than half the canyon.
A heavy sense of pressure, accompanied by moist water vapor and an indescribable earthy smell, swept over everything.
Immediately after, a giant orange shadow that blotted out the sky broke through the smoke.
It was a giant toad wearing an oversized Japanese-style vest, with a short sword at its waist large enough to serve as a bridge and a giant tobacco pipe in its mouth. Its volume was so massive that even the cliffs on both sides seemed narrow in comparison.
Gamabunta, the mob boss of Mount Myōboku and the head enforcer for the legendary Great Toad Sage.
It blinked its huge yellow eyes, and before it could even see its surroundings clearly, it felt as if some small thing was stepping on the bumps on its head as if walking on level ground.
"Where did this brat come from, daring to stand on this Great One's head? Where the hell did that bastard Jiraiya go?"
Bunta's voice was like muffled thunder, shaking the canyon and causing rocks to tumble down.
It was very displeased.
Usually, only the few strong individuals it acknowledged were qualified to summon it. Today, it was actually summoned by a brat whose hair hadn't even fully grown in, and the location was so awkward—stuck in the middle of a canyon, a place neither touching the sky nor the ground, which damaged its dignity as the Toad Boss.
"Brat, get the hell off this Great One!"
Bunta violently shook its massive head, a force sufficient to level a small building.
But Naruto gripped the rough skin on top of Bunta's head tightly, his whole body sticking to it like a suction cup.
"Waaah! Stop shaking! Are you trying to shake your master to death?!" Naruto wailed, but the voice that was constantly chattering in his heart also became exceptionally irritable at this moment.
[Damn! This is way too bumpy! This is the so-called Toad Boss? The user experience is terrible, okay!]
[Not only is the skin so rough and covered in bumps, but that voice sounds like a quacking duck with a subwoofer—it sounds awful!]
Naruto's inner thoughts vibrated across the heavenly curtain along with the violent jolting.
[If it were that big snot-slug called Katsuyu, at least it would be soft; I could accept it even if it's a bit slippery. Or Uncle Snake's kind of slippery giant snake—riding that would have the thrill of drag racing.]
[But what is this thing? Hard and smelly, and it even smokes! Second-hand smoke is lethal, okay!]
Although Bunta couldn't hear the inner thoughts of the ant on its head, as a summoned beast, its intuition sensed an inexplicable malice.
"Gero—! Get off me!"
Bunta was completely enraged. Its legs kicked off the rock wall violently, and its massive body actually performed a bizarre Thomas flare-like maneuver in the air. The entire canyon trembled as it tried to use centrifugal force to fling off the brat who was stuck to it like sticky candy.
Meanwhile, on the cliff top.
Jiraiya's eyes were wide as he watched this thrilling scene below.
"Oh oh oh! Amazing! As expected of Minato's son!"
Jiraiya even took out a small notebook to start recording, his eyes full of admiration. "Facing a summoned beast of Bunta's level, not only is there no fear, but he's showing incredible willpower to tame it? That sense of balance to maintain Chakrasuction even during violent shaking—he's simply a genius!"
"Even with Bunta resisting this much, he won't let go! What persistence!"
At this moment, Naruto's face had turned green.
He wasn't being persistent; he was trying to figure out how to stop himself from vomiting.
[I want to barf... I really want to barf... Blegh...]
[I can't take it, this is definitely the worst mount experience. I have to find a way to make it stop.]
Naruto gripped the toad skin with one hand and with great difficulty reached into the ninja tool pouch at his waist with the other.
[Seriously, Boss Bunta, you could at least transform. Just like that episode in the original series, didn't you turn into a fox? Can't you turn into a mature older sister type wearing a high-slit cheongsam and holding a tobacco pipe?]
[As long as you turn into a mature older sister type, I'll let you shake me! Shake however you want! You can even spin me like a hula hoop! But this current look... I'm really going to pass out!]
Bunta, who was jumping wildly in mid-air, stiffened for a moment, and the bumps on its back broke out in goosebumps. That feeling of being watched with a strange gaze was getting stronger and stronger.
It even felt like reaching back, drawing its blade, and hacking this brat to death.
"Still jumping, huh? Refusing a polite offer, are we!"
Naruto finally touched something in his ninja tool pouch. It wasn't a Kunai, nor an explosive tag, but a tightly wrapped rice ball box.
It was the special large-portion bento of love that Sister Ayame had blushingly stuffed into his hands when he went to Ichiraku Ramen to say goodbye before leaving.
[Since physical means aren't working, I'll have to use a magic attack. Although I originally planned to keep this for a midnight snack... Uuuugh, Sister Ayame's love, I'm letting you have it, you rascal toad!]
Taking advantage of the moment Bunta opened its mouth to roar, Naruto performed a sudden flip, timed it perfectly, and put strength into his arm.
"Shut up and eat this! Sure-Kill: Feeding Jutsu!"
Whoosh!
The large bento box drew a straight line in the air and flew unerringly into Bunta's black-hole-like mouth.
Bunta instinctively wanted to spit it out.
It was the boss of Mount Myōboku; it usually ate specially provided insect feasts. How could it eat some nonsensical human...
Eh?
The moment the rice ball burst in its mouth, a warm stream of Chakra with an incredible sense of healing rushed through its taste buds straight to its head.
It wasn't just the taste of rice and seaweed; it contained a special power that instantly calmed a turbulent soul.
That was a divine dish for'soothing emotions and restoring physical strength,' handmade by Ayameafter she had received the blessing of a legendary recipe.
Bunta's giant pupils suddenly constricted.
This feeling... why was it as comfortable as returning to the Sacred Water Pool deep within Mount Myōboku? The Chakra in its body, which had been a bit chaotic from the wild jumping, actually calmed down instantly.
Originally enraged, its movements suddenly became sluggish, and finally, it simply... stopped.
Its limbs gripped the rocks on both sides of the cliff, and its massive body hung steadily in mid-air.
...*Burp*."
An earth-shattering burp erupted from its mouth.
Naruto was still in his feeding pose, panting heavily, cautiously observing the big guy beneath his feet.
"What, is it not tasty? That was made for me by my favorite person... If you dare spit it out, I'll really fight you to the death!"
[Uuuugh, my deluxe Chashu rice ball... I paid too high a price to tame this guy. Now I don't even have a midnight snack to eat.]
Bunta was silent for a few seconds, then snorted two clouds of white smoke.
"Brat."
Its voice was still coarse, but the hostility that wanted to tear someone apart had mostly dissipated.
"Since this thing's... taste is barely acceptable, this Great One won't swat you like a fly today."
Bunta's giant eyes rolled upward, staring at the blonde kid on its head who looked heartbroken over a rice ball.
"Remember this Great One's name, Gamabunta. Since you can offer up a'sacrifice' of this level, I acknowledge that you are qualified to sign that scroll."
Jiraiya poked his head over the cliff top, his eyes nearly popping out of his head.
"Hey! He tamed it just like that? In just one round? Back then, to get this short-tempered fellow to listen, I had to drink with it for three days and three nights!"
[Ding!]
In Naruto's mind, the system's voice sounded at the right time, though with a hint of schadenfreude.
[Congratulations to the host for successfully taming an S-rank summoned beast through 'non-violent, pure temptation (appetite)' means.]
[Although your original intention was to swap it for a beautiful girl, the results show that the dishes prepared by your harem (reserve members) also have strong authority over ninja beasts.]
[Reward obtained: Summoning Jutsu Chakraconsumption halved.]
[Evaluation: This is a solid step you've taken toward the 'relying on women while acting tough' style. Next time you encounter an unbeatable enemy, perhaps consider throwing a rice ball first?]
Naruto plopped down on Bunta's head, feeling the now-steady view, and wiped cold sweat from his forehead.
"Tch, what use is halving Chakra? It's not like I can turn it into a cat-eared girl... But whatever, since it's a vehicle, being fuel-efficient is also a plus."
He patted Bunta's head, showing absolutely no awareness of being a contractor, but rather acting like he was dealing with a newly bought used car.
"Let's go, big guy, take me up. That old pervert is still waiting up there."