Chapter 19:
Two dark-skinned, muscular young men were carrying a black coffin into Wangsheng Funeral Parlor.
Tang Yu stood up and blocked their way, asking: "You are?"
One of the young men replied in somewhat awkward Mandarin: "We're from the Silent People Coffin-Bearing Team. We were sent by the old master to deliver funeral supplies."
"Oh!" Tang Yu immediately understood—this was the system's arrangement.
He quickly invited them into the back hall.
"How many funeral items did you bring this time?" Tang Yu asked after they set the coffin down.
The young man from the Silent People replied: "Five coffins, ten crates of candles and gold ingots, wooden horse boats… I forgot the exact number. We'll give you the bill later. We'll keep moving the stuff first."
The young man gave an awkward smile and continued unloading.
This entire scene was being live-streamed by Hu Tao.
The viewers were utterly shocked!
Originally, many of them still suspected that Hu Tao opening a funeral parlor was just a gimmick. Most thought it was all for show.
But now— coffins, gold ingots, candles were actually being delivered. If this was just an act, the cost was way too high.
{WTF! She's really opening a funeral parlor—insane!} {That coffin looks like good quality!!} {I'm a girl, but am I the only one who thinks those two Silent People guys are kinda hot?} {Putting coffins inside the house—won't Hu Tao wife be scared at night?} {If you're scared, you can rest in my arms, okay~!} {....}
While the viewers were buzzing with discussion, Hu Tao handed her phone to Tang Yu. "Here, hold this."
Tang Yu took it, confused.
The next moment, Hu Tao lifted the coffin lid and nimbly jumped inside. Then she lay down straight, stretching out comfortably.
"So comfy~ This coffin is nice, really nice," Hu Tao said excitedly, blinking her big eyes.
Tang Yu: "..."
Viewers: "..."
After a moment of stunned silence, the barrage exploded like crazy.
They were all floored by Hu Tao's move.
Holy crap! She just jumped straight into the coffin—no taboos at all!
{No way! Wife, are you product-testing right now?} {I was just saying she'd be scared—turns out I overthought it.} {Looking at how excited she is, you'd think she comes from a family of funeral directors!} {Kinda interesting… Hu Tao wife lying in a coffin. If I could join her inside… hehe, that'd be thrilling.} {...}
Compared to the viewers' shock, Tang Yu took it pretty well.
Because he understood Hu Tao. Funeral affairs were her main profession. If she didn't get excited seeing a coffin, that would be abnormal!
Half an hour later, the two Silent People young men finished moving all the funeral supplies inside.
The back hall of Wangsheng Funeral Parlor suddenly looked very crowded.
After checking everything, the two young men bid farewell and left.
Meanwhile.
Lu Yan and Zhao Xiaozhen, who had been constantly monitoring Tang Yu and Hu Tao's movements, were now extremely excited.
Lu Yan said: "This Hu Tao is really interesting. She actually opened a funeral parlor. Gotta admit—her popularity spiked a lot after this!"
Zhao Xiaozhen nodded: "Indeed. She knows how to stream. 2D girl + funeral theme is definitely eye-catching."
"But the more popular they get, the better it is for us."
The two women looked at each other and laughed.
During this time, they had gained quite a bit of traffic by smearing Tang Yu and Hu Tao. They had tasted blood.
Today, seeing Tang Yu and Hu Tao's traffic explode again, they once more hatched malicious ideas.
Lu Yan asked Zhao Xiaozhen: "How should we attack them this time?"
Zhao Xiaozhen thought for a moment and quickly came up with a brilliant plan. She leaned close to Lu Yan's ear and whispered: "We go order a coffin from them. Say you're depressed and want to die."
Lu Yan's eyes lit up. She gave a thumbs-up: "Great idea!"
On the other side, Tang Yu and Hu Tao were sitting in the main hall of Wangsheng Funeral Parlor, casually chatting with viewers.
At that moment, a colored barrage caught the attention of the entire live room.
{I want to order a coffin. I don't want to live anymore. Why can scumbag men and women still stream?}
The sender— was Lu Yan.
Tang Yu's face immediately darkened. This woman had been targeting him nonstop lately. Whenever he streamed, she would come stir trouble.
Before, Tang Yu had endured it under the principle of "a good man doesn't fight with women." But today was the grand opening of Wangsheng Funeral Parlor. She still came to cause trouble.
Tang Yu felt genuinely angry. He looked straight at the camera and snapped: "Wherever it's cool, go cool off. You're addicted to this now, huh?"
"I f—"
Tang Yu's mouth was suddenly covered by Hu Tao's small hand. He turned to her in confusion.
Hu Tao spoke sweetly to the camera: "Dear sister, you want to order a coffin, right? Perfect! Fifty thousand each. Grand opening special—buy one get one free! Buy now and you're profiting!"
With that, Hu Tao listed a coffin in the live room's shop window!
This move left the entire chat stunned.
This was a seller who dared to sell—and a buyer who dared to buy!
{WTF! Selling coffins online—this is a first!} {I'm seeing someone actually buy a coffin online for the first time too! LOL!} {Dying of laughter! Lu Yan probably never expected Hu Tao to straight-up sell her a coffin!} {Let you be depressed—now she's selling you a coffin. You buying or not? If not, you're fake depressed!} {...}
Drama-loving viewers immediately started hyping it up. Many rushed into Lu Yan's live room to stir more chaos.
Saying things like: "Not buying = fake depression!"
Lu Yan watched her popularity skyrocket and felt secretly delighted.
She knew she had to play the role fully—otherwise the netizens would turn on her.
So she opened Hu Tao's shop window and clicked Buy.
This action caused her popularity to surge again.
{WTF! You actually bought it?! Not afraid of bad luck?} {You can't just casually buy a coffin—it's bad omen. Someone's gotta use it. You're asking for death!} {Done for. If I were your parents, I'd break your legs. Buy anything but a coffin? Ignorance is fearless.} {...}
Lu Yan looked at the barrage and sneered inwardly.
She thought the viewers were being too superstitious. Buying a coffin was nothing. Worst case, when it arrived, she could just return it.
"Everyone, don't be superstitious. I went to a fortune teller before—he said as long as I behave, I'll live to ninety. I'm only in my twenties now!" Lu Yan said to the camera with a confident smile.
However, her ignorant comment only made the viewers laugh even harder.
Not superstitious—then why the hell did you go see a fortune teller?
Utterly brain-dead.
On the other side, a mysterious voice suddenly sounded in Hu Tao's mind.
{Ding: Client detected. Client ID: Lu Yan!}
{Client cause of death: Fatigue driving during live stream → 99.99% chance of car accident → 99.9999% chance of death}
{Client has been flagged. Subsequent successful exorcism of this client will reward a Mysterious Treasure Chest.}
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