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Chapter 5 - Rage vs Control

The next day.

I was in the bedroom.

Trying to mentally prepare myself.

Today is the exam.

I'm determined to pass and show them how much I understand mana. I hope they'll see how far I've come as I sit here, feeling the tension and anticipation in my quiet room.

But still, even though I pass.

After today's exam, the following day is scheduled for combat training.

That feels harder than everything else I've done.

I looked outside.

"Welp, time to go," I said to myself.

I walked to the kitchen like always.

In the kitchen, there were Eren, Erma, Lele, and Crystal.

My hands shook a little, giving away the anxiety building up inside me.

I can feel all the pressure inside me right now.

Crystal steps forward.

"It's time, Moikeru. How are you feeling right now?"

My body felt frozen.

I slowly lift up my head.

Looking at Crystal.

"I'll be lying if I said I don't feel nervous at the moment."

Crystal continues looking at me seriously.

"That's good, but try shaking off the emotion."

As the room goes silent.

Lele cleared her throat.

"Should you tell him about the exam?"

Crystal finally realized she forgot to tell me.

She put her hand on my shoulder.

"Your exam is basically maintaining your mana."

"Maintaining mana?" I replied

Crystal continues explaining

"You'll be transported to a snowy mountain, where your task is to cover yourself in mana and maintain it throughout the exercise. Somewhere at the end of the mountain, there is a cabin. Your objective is to locate it on your own."

I don't know why.

I feel like I understand, but at the same time, I don't.

Eren stepped up, giving a tender smile.

"Let's waste no time with this."

"Wait, no pep talk from you?" I questioned him

" Hell no, that's a waste of time!" Eren retorted

I was baffled by his answer.

Eren walked up to me.

I looked at him.

He looked at me.

Eren put his hand on my shoulder.

I was slowly going to give him a smile.

Then Eren lightly shoved me to the side.

Right before I reacted.

Eren raises his hand and quickly opens the portal.

After the portal was open, the building became freezing cold.

"ALRIGHT, HURRY UP AND GO THROUGH THE PORTAL BEFORE WE ALL FREEZE TO DEATH!" Eren shouted

My whole body was shivering.

But everyone else was fine.

I looked up at the portal.

Put on a serious face.

Marching through the portal.

Through the portal.

A huge gust of snowy wind hit me instantly.

I covered my face and looked around.

I noticed that the portal was already gone.

My whole body was starting to hurt from the frostbite.

I close my eyes.

Focusing on my mana.

I imagine my mana surrounding my whole body.

Keeping the cold away from my body.

As I was focusing, the mana started to surround my body.

As I open my eyes.

I don't feel the cold anymore.

I looked at my arm.

Seeing a thin layer of mana covering it like a blanket.

A huge smile was on my face.

I finally did it.

I successfully covered my body with mana.

Now I just have to maintain it.

As I looked around, it was hard to see.

But I can't stay here and twiddle my thumbs.

So I just walk in a random direction.

Walking in a snowy place like this isn't easy.

And the clouds were thick, dark grey, covering the sun completely.

But this is my training.

If I don't pass this, I can't get stronger.

10 minutes later.

My body was already feeling exhausted.

Staying focused felt suffocating.

I didn't know that doing this would have a big drawback.

Suddenly, an unfamiliar surge of mana swept over me, snapping me to attention and putting me on high alert.

My instincts kicked in. I held my breath as a chill ran down my spine, and for a moment, uncertainty took over.

But this mana doesn't belong to anyone I know.

This mana feels dark.

But comparing my dark mana to that one.

That one is darker.

I looked up and saw a human figure surrounded by purple mana.

I don't know if this person has ill intentions.

But all I know is that I have to pass him to continue my task.

As I keep walking towards the person.

Seeing it became clear and clear.

Then the person and I stop right in front of each other.

I was panting.

As I look at the person in front of me.

I saw a familiar face.

The guy was giving a cold face.

He was wearing a black cloak with a giant sword on his back.

As I was checking him out.

Trying to figure out who he is.

Then something clicked in.

I remember.

"Hold on, I know you. You're Shamueru Balfram, right?"

Shamueru ticked his teeth.

"Yeah, so what about it? Should I know you?"

"Weren't you supposed to be in the demon realm?" I questioned him

Shamueru's face became tense.

My body instinct was flaring up.

Shamueru started to raise his right arm.

" Yeah, so what did the kingdom send you to monitor me?" As Shamueru grabs his giant sword handle. He continued, "to make sure I don't come back!"

Shamueru releases a burst of energy.

I jumped back, confused about what he was talking about.

"Hold on, what are you talking about?"

Shamueru started to unsheath his sword.

I started to sense danger.

"Look, I was also kicked out of the kingdom. They sentenced me to the forest of no return. You and I are in the same boat!"

Shamueru's face went from cold to annoyed.

"Don't you dare say we're in the same boat."

Shamueru fully pulled the giant sword out.

The giant sword was a black-and-purple, double-edged sword with a dragon's head carved on the handle.

"We are far from the same. So either move out of my way or die by my menacing blade!?"

I look at his blade.

Just by looking at it, I could tell the sword was packed with mana.

"Hey man, let's all just calm down. We don't have to resort to violence," as I do hand jester signaling to calm down.

Shamueru pointed his sword at me.

My face became nervous.

"What is your name?" Shamueru questioned me

"Maikeru…" I answered

"Aye, dumbass, what is your full name?" Shamueru angrily questioned again

"Maikeru Kuro… why do you need to know my full name?" I'd replied and questioned back

Shamueru became more annoyed.

"Kuro… huh… so you're related to him!"

Related?

"You know my father?" I asked him

Shamueru sighed.

"Whatever, let's get back on track. So your name is Maikeru, right?"

That sucked. He turned away from the topic.

I wanted to know if he knew my father and could provide some info.

But I can't be too greedy with information.

My mana was running low, and it was getting ridiculously hard to keep it up.

"That's correct…" My utterance staggered.

Shamueru's eyes narrowed even more.

"The reason I want to know your name is so I can carve it on their grave."

My eyes widened in shock and fear.

"Wait…what do you mean about that…"

BAM!!

Shamueru uses the flat side of his sword.

Hitting the side of my body.

I flew into the wall.

Smashing into it.

I was knocked out.

But in a few seconds, I regained consciousness.

I was panting heavily from the hit.

"Oh, you're a sturdy one." Shamueru already started walking here.

He continued.

"Look, I don't care if you were kicked out of the kingdom or anything you said. I won't take any risk of anyone seeing me."

My left side was hurting.

And my eyes felt blurred.

Everything started to feel cold.

The cold went deeper.

Not just the snow.

Not simply the wind.

But the pressure is coming from Shamueru.

It felt… suffocating.

It felt like the darkness around him wasn't just magic. It was pure hatred made real.

I struggled to push myself up, my arms shaking violently as I attempted to maintain the thin layer of mana around my body.

My breath came out in uneven bursts.

"P-please… just listen…" I choked out, my voice hardly holding together.

Shamueru didn't slow down.

Didn't hesitate.

Didn't care.

Each step he took crushed the snow beneath him like it meant nothing.

A cold certainty emanated from Shamueru's voice as he addressed me.

In that moment, as I saw him drag his blade behind him, the metal carving a deep line through the frozen ground, I realized there would be no reasoning with him.

My thoughts raced. Was there really nothing I could say to stop him? Was there no argument strong enough to stop the violence I felt coming?

Yet, a sense of inevitability settled over me, as if the outcome had already been decided.

"I already told you," he said coldly, "I don't take chances."

I tried to stand up straight.

But my legs gave out.

I dropped back to one knee.

My mana flickered.

The cold rushed in instantly.

It stabbed inside my bones.

"…I'm not your enemy…" I spoke softly.

Shamueru stopped a few feet away from me.

For a brief moment,

I thought he might actually listen.

Then,

"Wrong answer."

SWOOSH!

The blade came down.

I barely rolled to the side in time, the impact splitting the ground where I had just been.

The shockwave alone sent me tumbling.

My mana shattered.

The cold slammed into my body again.

I screamed as frost bit into my skin.

"AHHH—!"

Shamueru advanced forward again, faster this time.

Snow lifted at each step, swirling unnaturally around him just as darkness flowed into the ground beneath his feet.

The battlefield itself was changing.

Cracking.

Freezing.

Dying.

I forced myself up again, teeth chattering violently.

Think… think… move…

Yin wavered softly around my hand.

I threw it forward—

A desperate slash of condensed darkness shredded through the air.

Shamueru didn't dodge.

He cut through it.

Clean.

Like it wasn't even there.

My eyes widened.

That… was everything I had…

He disappeared.

My instincts shouted.

I turned—

Too slow.

SLAM—

His knee drove into my ribs.

Something broke.

Air exploded out of my lungs.

I flew across the snow, bouncing once, then twice, before skidding to a stop.

"GHH—!"

I coughed violently, blood staining the snow beneath me.

My eyes blurred.

My body wouldn't respond.

Get up… GET UP…

But it wouldn't move.

Shamueru walked toward me again.

Slow.

Patient.

Like a predator feasting on a kill.

"Is this really all?" he asked.

I forced my head up.

"I… I can still fight…"

Even I didn't believe it.

He tilted his head slightly.

"…Pathetic."

I pushed my body.

Yin gathered again—faint, unstable—but there.

It quivered like it didn't want to obey me.

I lunged forward.

A reckless charge.

A scream burst from my throat while I swung wildly—

Shamueru entered into my range.

Effortlessly.

His blade struck.

CRACK—

The impact sent a sharp, horrifying snap through my arm.

"AAAAAAHHHHHH!!!"

Pain erupted.

White.

Blinding.

My right arm bent at an unnatural angle.

Broken.

Completely broken.

I collapsed to the ground, holding it, my body shaking uncontrollably.

Tears ran down my face.

The pain wouldn't stop.

It kept spreading.

Burning.

Consuming.

My fingers dug at the snow, trying to escape something I couldn't escape.

"P-please… STOP…!!" I begged, my voice shattering apart.

"I'll leave… I won't say anything… I swear… just… please…"

My forehead pressed into the snow.

I couldn't even look at him anymore.

"I don't want to die…"

For a moment,

There remained only silence.

The wind wailed.

Snow drifted over my body.

Then,

"No."

That one word crushed everything.

"I told you already," Shamueru said, lifting his sword again. "I don't care about your excuses."

I tried to crawl away.

My fingers pierced into the snow.

Each movement sent shocks of agony through my body.

My broken arm dragged uselessly beside me.

"Someone… help…" I uttered.

No one came.

SLAM—

The flat of the blade crashed into my back.

My body went limp instantly.

Everything went dark.

Silence.

Merely the wind.

Only the snow.

My body lay motionless.

Unconscious.

Shamueru stood there for a moment longer, staring at me.

Then he exhaled sharply.

"Tch."

He rested the sword on his shoulder.

"Pathetic."

He turned away.

Taking a slow step forward.

Then another.

"…They really send trash after me now…"

"…Kingdom's gotten desperate."

At that moment, the sharp sound of snow being compacted underfoot signaled the arrival of another presence.

He stopped.

The air moved.

Behind him—

The snow trembled.

A dim pulse of dark energy spread outward.

Low.

Heavy.

Wrong.

The temperature dropped even further.

Shamueru looked back.

"…What?"

My body moved.

Slow.

Unnatural.

I stood up.

Head lowered.

Arm still broken.

But something else had taken over.

There was no fear.

No hesitation.

Just movement.

Just intent.

Yin wasn't flickering anymore.

It was… flowing.

It had decided to act on its own.

Shamueru stared for a second.

Then smiled.

"…So annoying."

BOOM!

We both moved at the same time.

This time—

The impact shook the entire area.

My Yin wrapped around my body—not flickering anymore.

Flowing.

Dense.

Alive.

His blade struck—

But stopped.

Caught in the darkness cloaking my arm.

The ground beneath us shattered.

Snow blasted outward in a violent ring.

"…Oh?" Shamueru's grin widened.

I didn't respond.

I attacked.

Faster.

Cleaner.

My broken arm didn't slow me down.

Didn't matter.

My body twisted unnaturally, launching a kick into his side—

THUD—

He blocked—but slid back.

The ground cracked under his feet.

"…You're not even conscious," he muttered.

"…and you're still coming at me?"

I moved again.

No pause.

No hesitation.

A flurry of strikes poured out—each one more forceful than the last.

Each hit carried heavy pressure.

Yin lashed out like fangs.

Shamueru met them all.

Blade flashing.

Darkness colliding with darkness.

The battlefield couldn't handle it anymore.

Cracks spread across the ground.

Chunks of frosted soil lifted into the air from the pressure.

The sky itself appeared to dim.

The wind shrieked violently, drawn into the clash.

Every impact bent the air.

BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!

I struck again—

He parried—

I followed—

He countered—

A slash tore across my chest—

But I didn't react.

Didn't slow.

My fist slammed into his jaw—

He slid back—

Snow exploded behind him.

"…This is insane," he muttered under his breath.

But he was smiling.

Wider now.

Enjoying it.

He rushed forward again.

Our attacks collided again—

Faster now.

Too fast for the eye to follow.

A shockwave blasted outward, clearing the snow completely for a moment—revealing shattered ground beneath.

My leg swept low,

He jumped—

His blade came down—

I caught it—

The impact drove me into the ground—

CRACK—

The earth ripped under me—

But I forced myself back up instantly.

Relentless.

Endless.

Like something was pushing my body forward, no matter what.

Neither of us gave ground.

For the first time,

We were equal.

But it didn't feel right.

Something inside me—deep, buried—was screaming.

Not afraid.

Not in pain.

But in confusion.

Why am I moving?

My body advanced forward again on its own.

No hesitation.

No thought.

Just instinct.

Yin pulsed violently around me, extending across the ground like a living form.

The snow underneath my feet blackened.

Cracked.

Shattered.

Shamueru noticed.

His eyes sharpened.

"…So it's not just power," he muttered. "…it's control."

I disappeared.

Not fast,

Gone.

My body reappeared behind him, my broken arm swinging like it wasn't even damaged.

SLAM!

The hit connected.

Shamueru slid forward, boots carving deep trenches into the frozen ground.

"…Tch—!"

He spun instantly, blade cutting through the air—

I ducked.

Too smooth.

Too perfect.

My movements weren't mine anymore.

Each step flowed into the next, as if I'd done this a thousand times.

Like something else was fighting for me.

My body surged forward with a newfound assertiveness, as if reclaiming control, and I drove my knee into his stomach—

He blocked—

But the impact still forced him back.

The ground exploded beneath him.

Snow shot into the sky.

"…You're adapting," Shamueru said, breathing slightly more heavily now.

"…No… not you."

His grip held tighter on his weapon.

"…That thing inside you."

I didn't respond.

Couldn't.

Yet something inside me… reacted.

Yin surged harder.

The air got heavier.

Harder to breathe.

Shamueru grinned.

"Good."

He dashed forward again—

Faster than before.

This time—

He was serious.

His blade glowed with dense darkness as he swung downward—

I raised my arm—

BOOM—

The collision sent a shockwave ripping through the battlefield.

The soil cracked open between us.

A sharp crack ran outward for meters.

We pushed against each other—

Power against power.

Darkness versus darkness.

Then—

He twisted his blade.

My defense broke for a split second—

SLASH—

A deep cut tore across my shoulder.

Blood sprayed across the snow.

But my body didn't flinch.

Didn't stop.

Didn't even acknowledge it.

I grabbed his arm.

Tight.

Too tight.

His eyes widened slightly.

"…What the—"

I banged my head into his.

CRACK—

The tone echoed.

Both of us wobbled back—

Then rushed forward again.

No space.

No breathing room.

Just violence.

Pure, relentless violence.

Punches.

Kicks.

Blades.

Impacts resounded like thunder across the frozen field.

Every blow stronger than the last.

Each clash is more destructive.

The environment couldn't keep up anymore.

Chunks of ice lifted into the air.

The ground collapsed in sections.

The wind spiraled wildly around us.

Even the sky seemed darker.

Like it was reacting.

Like it was watching.

Shamueru laughed.

Actually laughed.

"This is what I wanted!"

He charged forward—

I met him halfway—

BOOM—

Another massive shockwave blasted outward.

Both of us were sent sliding back.

For a brief moment—

We stopped.

Standing across from each other.

Breathing.

Watching.

Waiting.

Shamueru wiped blood from his mouth.

"…If you were like this from the start…"

He smirked.

"…you might've actually survived."

My body leaned forward again.

Ready to move.

Ready to fight.

Ready to destroy itself if it had to.

And that's when

Everything continued as before.

Perfectly matched.

Shamueru's smile grew wider.

"Yes… This is it."

He rushed in again.

This time—

Harder.

A full-powered strike.

I met it directly.

BOOM—

The collision sent both of us skidding back.

Then—

Both of us leaped back.

Landing several feet apart.

The atmosphere between us warped slightly from the lingering pressure.

Snow refused to settle.

It hovered.

Caught in the energy.

Shamueru rolled his shoulder.

"…You're still trash."

A pause.

He smirked.

"…but at least now you're not boring."

Silence.

The breeze ceased.

For a split second,

Everything froze.

Then—

We moved again.

Even faster than before.

Everything blurred.

Right before impact,

A figure came into view.

Between us.

Black clothes.

Red hair.

A black blindfold covering his eyes.

"Yo."

He raised one hand casually.

And caught both attacks.

Effortlessly.

Time… stopped.

The force—

Gone.

Like it never existed.

"…What?" Shamueru muttered.

Before either of us could react,

The man moved.

A sharp strike slammed into Shamueru's stomach.

BOOM—

The ground cratered beneath him.

Air burst from his lungs.

Then—

An elbow crashed into my face.

My body slammed down beside him.

Hard.

The man moved forward—

Placing a foot on each of us.

Pinning us.

Completely.

Like we were nothing.

Like everything we just did didn't matter.

He sighed.

"Y'all did all of this…"

He paused.

"…and still get beaten up by me."

Shamueru growled.

"Get… off me…"

The man tilted his head.

"…You sure?"

"…Get off me."

"…Alright."

He stepped off.

Just like that.

Shamueru slowly stood.

His look—

Surprised.

Genuinely.

He glanced at the man again.

Trying to understand.

Then clicked his tongue.

"…Tch."

And turned.

Walking away.

But this time—

No arrogance.

No extra words.

Just… leaving.

The man watched him go.

Then glanced down at me.

I was still moving.

Still trying to get up.

Even now.

Even after everything.

"…Damn," he muttered.

"…you're feisty."

I staggered to my feet again.

Barely conscious.

Barely standing.

Yin continued flickering weakly around me.

Like it didn't want to let go.

The man sighed.

Then—

CHOP—

His hand struck the back of my neck.

Everything went black instantly.

My body collapsed.

Finally.

Completely unconscious.

The Yin faded.

Silence returned.

The man stretched.

Rolling his shoulders.

"…Welp."

He looked down at me.

"You were right to ask me to watch him, Eren."

The random guy lifted me up.

putting me on his shoulder.

He turned around.

Walking away into the falling snow.

After everything, only silence remained. It made me think about all the violence and struggle that just happened, and the consequences that would follow.

And a battlefield that looked like monsters had ripped it apart.

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