Upon realizing this, Uzi blushed deeply and thought to herself, "How stupid of me! I didn't think it through properly. The sun was about to rise and I didn't know... and..." She sighed, trying to calm herself, but she couldn't stop thinking about the situation. Besides, this was the least of her problems; she had also realized she had given N her address, and not only that, but she had brought him into her room. So she was completely exposed to him, and her anxiety grew even more when she remembered Julia's words about N potentially using her to get what he wanted.
As she stood in the hallway, questions began swirling in her mind. "What am I going to do now? Could he have been acting all this time, waiting for the right moment to reveal his true colors? What will I do if he decides to hurt my father? I have to find a solution, a contingency plan." Then an idea struck her: he was also in a vulnerable position now, so perhaps she could trap him and open the windows to let the sunlight do all the work. "Maybe that will work," she thought to herself.
The condition Uzi was experiencing is called paranoia, or more precisely, paranoid personality disorder. Its symptoms include suspicion of those around them—family, friends, or even lovers. This stems from traumas or disturbances experienced at some point in a person's life, and for a girl her age, it's most likely childhood or early adolescence.
Now imagine a teenage girl, a very sensitive period in a person's life. At the start of middle school, her childhood friends gradually drift away to hang out with more "cool" people at school. Over time, their interactions become infrequent, sometimes to the point where they don't even greet each other. Add to that the fact that people don't understand or accept her because of her interests, which they find unusual. The result is complete isolation; she has no one to spend time with, and that's where the problems truly begin.
In every school, there's that lonely student who has no friends due to specific circumstances, perhaps problems at home. Instead of receiving support from those around him, he becomes a victim of bullying by other students, whether physical or verbal. He finds himself completely alone facing these bullies because the other students don't want to intervene, risk getting involved, or becoming the next victim. Even worse, if this student stands up to the bullies or defends himself, he becomes the one at fault for using violence against someone who was hitting or insulting him. In other words, the roles are reversed, and the victim becomes the perpetrator, and the perpetrator becomes the victim.
As we know, Uzi is a fierce and rebellious character. She wouldn't tolerate being insulted or hit by anyone. Because of this, she got into a lot of trouble in middle and high school, eventually reaching a point of complete apathy and suspicion towards everyone around her. This stemmed from the fact that no one offered her help when she needed it, and everyone tried to trample on her to prove they were better than her.
While standing in the hallway, Uzi was almost convinced by the idea of using sunlight, but she also remembered what N had done. He had stood before that monster, Grog, even when he desperately needed blood, yet he didn't care and prioritized her safety over his own. She also remembered all his praise for her, his ridiculous way of speaking, and his foolish behavior. Remembering all of this, the doubts and suspicions in her mind gradually faded until she decided against using sunlight and preferred to leave things as they were.
Uzi sighed and continued down the corridor towards the bathroom to give N the clothes, thinking to herself, "Well, maybe it won't be so bad. Maybe I can trust him a little... Besides, I'll definitely need him for what's coming next." Uzi hadn't forgotten about that person, or what they called Salazar Gungutsu, and Julia's warnings about him, as well as the mystery of the Absolute Slover and its connection to her mother. So, there was a lot to do, and she would need his help. Uzi opened the bathroom door, saying, "N, I found some clothes that might suit you..." She stopped abruptly, stunned by the sight before her. N stood there, his tall, pale body covered only by a white towel wrapped around his waist, water dripping from his white hair and body.
The two stared at each other in shock. Suddenly, Uzi threw the clothes she was holding at him, slammed the door shut, and said loudly, blushing, "You... you idiot! Why are you naked?!"
N, equally shocked, replied, "But Uzi, I was taking a shower. You're the one who walked in."
Uzi realized her mistake—that she hadn't knocked or asked permission before entering—and said from behind the bathroom door, "Okay... okay, I understand... I'm sorry... Anyway, I got you some clothes from Dad's wardrobe... Put them on and come to my room... Understand?"
N replied, "Okay, I understand. I'll put it on." As he responded, he heard footsteps approaching her room. N covered his face with both hands, his own face flushed with embarrassment at what had happened, and let out a deep sigh in an attempt to calm himself. "Great... I've upset her now," he thought to himself. Although it wasn't his fault, N, due to his complicated past with J and V and his tendency to handle things, felt responsible for everything bad that happened, even minor issues. This condition is called "self-diagnosis," "excessive self-blame," "guilt complex," or, most commonly, "excessive responsibility."
This condition is very common in obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) or after psychological trauma, where the person tends to blame themselves for events and problems even if they had no part in them. They see themselves as the "cause" of what happens around them. This condition is not an illness but a cognitive distortion that can contribute to severe depression. The reason for this is that the person is constantly criticized by those around them, which plants in their mind the idea that they are the "cause" of what happens. They begin to say to themselves, "I am the reason for other people's unhappiness" or "This problem happened because of me."
As for N's situation, this young man, who doesn't know his past or how he became a vampire in the first place, has no mother, father, siblings, or even friends to comfort him in his worst moments. All he has are his two female classmates: J, who criticizes and punishes him for everything, no matter how trivial. Even if he follows her orders to the letter and never objects, it's still not enough for her; she still sees him as useless and worthless. The second is V. N doesn't deny that he once had some admiration for V, but over time, this admiration began to fade because of her behavior towards him. She either ignores him or insults him and calls him useless as well.
Despite all these events, N took no action to stop them or confront them, even though he was capable of doing so. He could have left the Old Mansion and abandoned V and J, or he could have fought them. He wasn't weak; he could have faced them and even inflicted serious damage. But he refrained from doing so because of his nature and his understanding that V and J were the only two people he had left in this world, and without them, he would be alone. This was the main reason he didn't leave the Old Mansion, which he also hated. Where would he go? What place would shelter him? Would he find anyone in this brutal world who would accept him as he was?
Without realizing it, N had created another problem for himself: what's known as "fear of migration or loneliness." This is a state where a person experiences intense fear of loneliness and rejection, often stemming from childhood neglect, constant criticism, or emotional instability. This leads them to cling to toxic relationships to avoid living alone. This situation can be described as a prison without bars; even if you have the ability to escape, you make excuses to avoid doing so. This is what N faced every day, every hour, every minute he spent in that Old Mansion.
N put on the clothes Uzi had brought him. They were almost a good fit, but he felt a little uncomfortable, especially around his stomach, shoulders, and chest. The pants were also a bit too short. Despite these shortcomings, N felt immense happiness. This was the first time anyone had given him new clothes instead of the old ones he wore all the time.
N went to Uzi's room and knocked before entering to avoid any awkwardness. Uzi told him he could come in. Upon entering, he saw that Uzi had also changed her clothes. She was no longer wearing that black jacket and short jeans, but had changed into something more comfortable. N stood in the doorway, stunned by the sight: a pink winter top and plain black pants. She wasn't wearing her hat, so N could see her long pink hair completely uncovered.
Uzi was surprised by the way N was staring at her and asked, "What? Is something wrong?"
N snapped back to reality and said, "No... nothing's wrong."
Uzi asked again, trying to understand what had happened, "Then why aren't you standing there?"
N scratched his head, looking away from Uzi. "Well... actually, this is the first time I've seen you like this." Uzi looked at him in surprise, and N continued, "I don't mean you look bad or anything, not at all... it's just... I mean you look normal." N said this with a hint of embarrassment on his face.
Uzi, too, felt a little embarrassed by his words and said, "Thanks... I guess..." Then she gestured for him to come inside and stand up, which N did.
Uzi sat on the bed and said, "You can sit in the chair next to my desk, or on the floor, or... I don't know, you can sit wherever you like."
N chose the chair next to her desk and sat down. Silence filled the room as neither of them knew what to say to the other. After several more minutes of silence, N spoke, saying, "I'm sorry."
Uzi was surprised by this and asked, "Sorry? Why are you apologizing?"
N looked at the ground with guilty eyes and said, "Because of what happened a little while ago... I mean, in the bathroom."
Uzi remembered the incident and said awkwardly, "No... it's okay." Then she looked at his face, which looked like a child apologizing for something bad, and continued, "You don't have to apologize. It wasn't your fault in the first place. I should have knocked." N felt relieved by what he heard; he had thought Uzi would treat him like J and V and criticize him. Uzi added, "I also wanted to thank you."
N said, "You're thanking me?!" N was surprised by this and continued, "But why?" For N, there was nothing to thank him for; he hadn't done anything significant that night.
Uzi said, "I wanted to thank you for helping and saving me tonight."
N said, "Oh, that's it. No need to thank me; it wasn't much."
Uzi said, "Come on, you risked your life and faced a huge, furry, dog-faced monster to help me, ignoring your own weakness from malnutrition. And on top of that, you came with me to the swamp without me even explaining why we were there."
N said, "Thanks, Uzi, but it really wasn't much. After all, we're friends, and this is what friends do for each other, right?"
Uzi looked down at the ground, pondering N's words, and said, "Yes, yes, you're right." She stood up, took out her mother's book, and showed it to N, saying, "Friends don't keep secrets from each other. The reason I went to the swamp was to get the key to this book so I could open it."
N remembered what Julai had said before they left and asked, "And this book has something to do with your mother, right?"
Uzi sighed and sat on the bed, saying, "Yes, I was hoping to find something about her." Then she began to explain everything to him, from the moment her father gave her the book to the minute she met him and asked him to come with her. Uzi did all this because, after all this time thinking and the events of the night, she decided to confide in N. It was the least she could do after everything he had done for her, and also to prepare for anything that might happen in the future.
After hearing this, N said, "So your mother was in an accident and disappeared, and everyone thought she was dead, but you weren't convinced. After your father gave you your mother's belongings, you found the book and hoped to find a clue as to why she disappeared." After understanding all this, he said, "Wow... that's a lot and quite unusual."
Uzi replied, "Tell me about it. The problem is, after everything we've been through, the key was fake, just a stupid trick by my mother." She lay down on the bed and sighed as she continued, "And after all this trouble, I've been asked even more questions than before, and on top of that, we've become enemies of a mysterious person we know nothing about. If Julia is right, he could attack us at any moment."
N was still sitting in the chair, listening to everything Uzi said, and then he said, "Yes... that's very bad."
Uzi asked, "You're a vampire. Don't you have any information that could be helpful?"
N shook his head, saying, "No, I'm sorry. Even my knowledge of the outside world is limited, and everything I know comes from what V and J say. So, I don't have much to offer."
Uzi asked, "Well, what about those two... I mean, J and V? Maybe they know something. So, perhaps if you asked them..."
N interrupted Uzi, saying, "No, believe me, that wouldn't help us."
Uzi was surprised by N's response, and even more so by the look of sadness and worry on his face. Looking at him with equal concern, she asked, "Is your relationship with them that bad?"
N said, "Well... I don't want to say it's actually bad, but... they don't usually tell me anything here. In fact, they don't trust me or think I'm competent."
"I'm sorry," Uzi said.
"Why?" N asked. "There's no reason to apologize."
"Yes, there is," Uzi said. "I got you into this mess because of my selfishness and my desire to find the key, and you're going to die because of me too."
"No, you don't have to apologize," N said. "I went with you willingly because I wanted to help you. After all, we're friends, and believe me, even if you went to the ends of the earth, I'd go with you."
After hearing this, Uzi couldn't help but smile. It was the first time in a long time that someone had said something like that to her. Just then, her alarm clock rang, signaling that it was 7:30 AM, the time Uzi usually woke up for school. "Well, we can't do anything right now," Uzi said. "The best thing we can do is get some rest."
"Yes, you're right," N said. "It was a long night."
Uzi said, "You can sleep here, and I'll sleep on the couch."
N objected, "No, no, I can sleep on the couch, and you can sleep here."
Uzi said, "Sleep on the couch? What do you mean? Don't vampires sleep upside down?"
N said, "Yes, but we can sleep normally too."
Uzi said, "That won't work. If you sleep on the couch, there's a chance my dad will come home unexpectedly and find a strange young man sleeping on his couch. How do you think I should explain that to you?"
N said, "Well, what if I sleep on the floor? That way you can sleep on the bed, and if your father comes home, you'll be in your room instead of him finding you asleep on the sofa and getting suspicious. Plus, if anything happens, I'll be there to protect you. What do you think?"
Uzi considered the option, and despite her hesitation, her exhausted body couldn't argue. She said, "I think this is... the best solution we have."
Uzi placed some pillows and blankets on the floor to make it comfortable for N. N lay down on the floor, and Uzi lay down on the bed. N said to her, "Goodnight, Uzi."
Uzi replied, "Goodnight, N." Uzi closed her eyes, and she and N fell into a deep sleep.