AKIHIRO ATLAS
I turned slowly.
Even this action itself... felt like a decision. As if seeing what was behind me wasn't just about satisfying my curiosity... it meant crossing an irreversible threshold. My neck tightened, my shoulders tensed involuntarily. That disgusting, heavy stench still burned my lungs; with every breath I drew not only air but rotting existence into myself. My stomach churned, but this time even vomiting didn't feel like a relief—because the smell of this place had permeated me. It was as if it wasn't just polluting my body... it was also polluting my mind.
And then...
I saw it.
At first glance… my brain refused to comprehend what it was seeing.
Because this thing… this being… this man… was incompatible with the rest of this place.
In the middle of hell…
It looked like an "order."
It was suspended in the air. But this wasn't ordinary gliding. It was as if gravity had never existed for it. The lava beneath was boiling, the black pillars around it were cracking, the sky was decaying... but it remained steady amidst all this chaos. Its robes billowed gently, but this was not the effect of wind—for there was no wind here. This movement... seemed like a natural extension of his being.
My eyes involuntarily drifted to the details.
His hair…
Dark red.
But it's not just an ordinary color. Like the final moment of a fire about to burn out—that deep, intense red hue right before it dies down. It was short and wavy, but every strand... seemed to contain movement within itself. It wasn't static. It was moving slightly, almost acting as if it were alive.
On its forehead…
A wreath.
But it wasn't just an ornament.
The golden color had a fine yet complex structure. It resembled olive branches, but it was far from nature's simplicity. Every curve held a calculation, every detail a meaning. This garland... was not like a king's crown. It was more like a judge's seal. The moment I saw it, an inexplicable pressure arose within me. As if this thing... wasn't just powerful... it could also be "right."
I looked at its face.
And there...
Something was missing.
His eyes were closed.
But this wasn't a weakness.
On the contrary... it was scarier.
Because even though his eyes were closed... I could feel him looking at me. At that moment, I realized that gaze is not a physical thing. He didn't need eyes to see. His head was slightly tilted to the side, his face calm, almost serene. This expression... it was something that shouldn't be in this environment. A face this peaceful in the middle of hell... it felt wrong.
So wrong.
His robe...
Even describing it was difficult.
Layer upon layer. Black, dark red, copper, and gold tones intertwined. The outer layers were heavy and dark, but those red patterns moving within the interior... they seemed almost living. They resembled clouds, but this wasn't something celestial—more like fragments of a burning sky. His arms were wide, billowing slowly with each movement. And those countless tassels on him...
They...
It was disturbing.
Because their movements were unnatural.
There was no wind, yet they were constantly moving. As if they were being pulled by something invisible. Their conical, red tips hung downward, sometimes touching, sometimes separating. This movement... carried a rhythm. But this rhythm… wasn't like a heartbeat.
More like…
The approach of something.
I looked at their hands.
Slender, long fingers.
Elegant.
But beneath that elegance was something else.
His hands were raised upward. The left hand was higher, as if trying to touch the sky. The right hand, however, was in a more controlled position in front of his chest. This posture... was not an attack. Nor was it a defense.
This…
It was like a call.
Or a moment of judgment.
His feet…
They weren't touching the ground.
They were naked.
But their fingertips… weren't normal.
Red, conical coverings… resembling claws. But that wasn't quite right either. It looked more like an extension of those tassels. It was as if there was no boundary between his body and his clothing.
That moment, I understood.
This being…
was not "dressed".
What happened was... that was it.
My heart raced.
But it wasn't just fear.
It was... an awareness.
Everything I had just seen in the battle—that woman's terrible transformations, Magnus's destruction... it was all still fresh in my mind. But this being... it was different from them. They were in destruction.
This one, however...
He was standing "above" the destruction.
I wanted to take a step back.
But my feet wouldn't move.
As if in this scene... my role was merely to "witness."
"Would you like to have a brief conversation about 'The Non-Shining Child?'"
The moment I heard the words... something shifted inside me.
This wasn't just an address. It was as if it were the external expression of a part of me that had always been there but whose name I had never put to words. "The Non-Shining One." As the words echoed in my ears, I tried to decipher their meaning, but I realized within the first second that this was not something that could be understood through simple deduction. It was… like a title. But it wasn't bestowed; it was revealed. It was as if I was that thing and it was just... a reminder.
My throat was dry. Even swallowing became difficult. The disgusting smell of this place still haunted me, but at that moment I realized that what was bothering me wasn't just the smell of this place anymore. His presence... was heavier. Deeper. It was as if the entire area I was in was bending around him. The black pillars, the lava, that rotten sky... all receded into the background. This being displaced everything from its center just by standing there.
His eyes were still closed.
But I could feel him looking at me.
No... the word "to look" was still inadequate. This was about being seen. It was about my innermost self, my thoughts, even the things I couldn't put a name to being revealed. It was as if he wasn't touching the surface of what I call "me"... but the deepest part. And while doing this, he wasn't making the slightest effort.
His arms were still in that strange, ritualistic position. The tassels were moving slowly, but this movement no longer seemed random to me. There seemed to be a pattern. A flow. A meaning. And this meaning… was something I didn't understand.
"What does that mean...? " I asked finally, my voice coming out weaker than I expected.
This question... wasn't really because I wanted to know the answer.
It was a defense mechanism.
Because truly learning the meaning of those words... might mean accepting something I perhaps didn't want to accept.
As for him…
He didn't move.
But his presence changed.
I didn't so much see this as feel it.
The hot, suffocating atmosphere around us intensified momentarily. It was as if the entire area we were in held its breath. The flow of the lava slowed down, even the vibrations within the black columns paused. This was not a display of power.
This…
It was a moment of "attention".
And that attention…
Was directed at me.
He adjusted his head with the slightest movement. His eyes were still closed, but even that small change caused a tremor inside me. It was as if something... had come into sharper focus.
And then he spoke.
The voice…
It was strange.
It was neither completely human nor completely foreign. It was soft, but there was heaviness within it. Every word was penetrating not only my ear but directly into my mind.
"This is your future, Akihiro, my child. Also, it is your meaning. You may know... Just because something doesn't shine doesn't mean it's dark."
There was a brief pause. But this pause was not in vain. At that moment, what he said resonated in my mind. It shattered. It searched for meaning. But it couldn't find it.
"Sometimes," he continued, his voice remaining calm but with a deeper undertone, "things that don't shine are those that reject the light itself. "
My heart paused for a moment.
This saying…
It wasn't an explanation.
It was an accusation.
Or worse...
A definition. It felt like a definition he was trying to describe me with. However, I couldn't comprehend it.
My breathing quickened. Something inside me wanted to object to these words. It wanted to say "No." But that word... didn't come out of my mouth. Because a part of me...
He understood.
Even if he didn't want to understand.
I couldn't take my eyes off him. It wasn't just fear. It was about not being able to escape. As if looking away from his would mean giving up on something...
But what?
I didn't know.
I just... felt it.
This being didn't just not know me.
They... knew me."
I could feel my voice trembling, but I had to speak anyway.
"You..." I said, forcing the words out, "...who are you? Where is this place? "
He slightly bowed his body and placed his right arm over his left shoulder, saying, "Forgive my rudeness; I forgot to introduce myself to you. "
Then his body assumed its initial position again, and his smile slowly faded away.
"I have no name that can be defined for you. However, for the sake of convenience… You may call me Thanatos, my child." he said.
The moment I heard this name, something inside me... shifted in the wrong place. It wasn't just a name. It carried an association, a shadow, a feeling of finality. Thanatos. The word itself was cold even though it was, but this coldness could be felt even here, in this rotting and burning hellish environment. An inexplicable chill spread through me. This being's self-identification with this name... didn't feel like a choice. It was more like an acceptance of an inevitable reality.
He was just standing there calmly, looking at me. That's what scared me.
While I was still trying to figure out who he was, my body spontaneously showed a small reflex. My right hand… opened slightly without me even realizing it. I still searched among my fingers for that familiar sensation—the beginning of lightning. This wasn't a decision to attack. It was more of a defensive instinct. If something happened, I had to be prepared.
But at that moment I realized…
This action… didn't even belong to me anymore.
Because he... had noticed.
That faint smile that appeared on Thanatos's face returned. But this time it was more distinct. It was more... amusing. His eyes were still closed, but despite this, his reaction as if he had seen my small movement intensified my unease. He tilted his head very slightly to the side, as if watching an innocent but unnecessary gesture made by a child.
"Oh…" he said, his voice soft yet carrying a subtle hint of sarcasm, "those reflexes… truly admirable. Your ability to sense danger... is sharper than I expected."
My fingers tightened involuntarily.
But he continued.
"Relax, Akihiro Atlas," he said, that natural way of saying my name… it sent a chill down my spine, "if I wanted to harm you… there wouldn't be a moment you'd even notice. "
This sentence…
It wasn't a threat.
It was a "fact".
And the scariest part… it felt true.
Thanatos waved his hand slightly, as if to disperse the heaviness of the atmosphere. The red tassels on his robe fluttered more visibly with his movement. This time, his movements appeared "lighter," but even this lightness was artificial. There was an unnatural ease.
"You need not worry," he continued, his voice this time almost... as if he were amused, "I have no plans today to tear you apart, burn you, or reduce you to a meaningless remnant of your existence."
There was a brief pause.
"Today...he said again.
This word... was deliberately left out.
I could feel it.
I clenched my teeth.
"What do you want?" I asked, trying to keep my voice steady. "Why did you bring me here? "
This question… not out of fear.
It came from anger and loss of control.
Because this being…
had torn me away from Magnus, from the war, from reality.
and had done it without any effort.
Thanatos bowed his head slightly. This gesture seemed respectful, but it contained a subtle irony.
"Just…" he said slowly, "I wanted to talk."
This answer…
Was frustrating.
My eyebrows furrowed.
"Did you bring me into this... place just to talk? " I said, gesturing around. The tension in my voice could no longer be hidden.
This time, Thanatos laughed lightly.
This laugh wasn't loud. But its echo... penetrated the space we were in. The bubbles in the lava burst faster for a moment, and the vibration within the black columns increased. It was as if this place was… responding to his emotions.
"'This thing'…" he repeated, savoring the words, "such a… limited definition."
Then he looked up.
And for the first time...
Its existence expanded.
This was not a physical change.
But I felt it.
It was as if the space we were in… was a part of it.
"This place," he said, his voice now deeper, with a heavier tone, "is one of those things you call 'Sacred Domains.'My heart stopped for a moment.
But it continued.
"But with a small difference…" he said, his smile reappearing, this time carrying a sharper, darker meaning, "this… is not one of the created beings. "
He took a step.
But that step…
The ground shifted.
The ground trembled slightly, the lava receded, and the air became even thicker.
"This place…" he said slowly, choosing each word carefully, "is mine. "
At that moment…
I understand.
But I didn't want to understand.
"I can't say I created it. However, it wouldn't exist if it weren't for me." he continued, his voice now completely calm, but this calmness… was frightening, "every layer of it, every scent of it, every rotten part of it."
He gestured around.
"These dark columns… this burning ground… this rotten sky… they are all a reflection of my thoughts. "
My breathing quickened.
I took a step back.
But this… wasn't an escape.
This… was a reflex of denial.
"Perhaps this could be called... the Sacred Domain of the Mind in your language. In short, they are mental spaces that a true god does not need to lift a finger to create and can place within a Sacred Domain as they wish. "
For a moment, even my breathing changed. What he said wasn't just a simple definition of power... no, it was something entirely different. Creating without even moving a finger. The moment this statement struck my mind, everything I had hitherto known as "power" became meaningless. I always thought that creating, changing, or destroying something must come at a cost. Energy, time, willpower... at least there must be a limit. But this... this completely erases the concept of boundaries. If such a thing were truly possible, then there would be no such thing as "doing." There would only be "wanting."
And this is even more disturbing.
Because if a being can create reality merely by thinking... then what is it that I call reality? Could the place where I stand now, the body I feel, even these thoughts of mine—all have come into existence "because someone wanted them to"? Even this possibility creates a strange emptiness within me. It's as if the ground is shifting and I still think I'm standing. If everything is a product of the mind... then am I truly "me," or am I merely something defined within that mind?
…And what's worse, if this is what they call the "Sacred Domain of the Mind"—
Then a god doesn't need any reason to put me here.
This thought weighed heavily on my stomach. Because this means not only power, but also that meaning depends on the whim of a single being. My choices, my struggles, my pains... they might all be part of a script written in someone else's mind. And if so... then does even my opposition really have any meaning?
…Or am I, too, just something within that "mental space," believing itself to be free?
Are the places I'm in real, or… mental?
Thanatos tilted his head slightly to the side, as if enjoying watching my reaction.
"For someone like you," he said, his voice slipping back into that slightly sarcastic tone, "such things might fall into the category of 'impossible.'"
A short pause.
Then…
"For me?" he continued.
He smiled.
"It's child's play. "
This word…
It weighed heavier than anything else.
Because at that moment I realized…
This being…
Was different even from Magnus.
It was worse.
Because Magnus was destroying things, some things. Our beings, those we fought against. However, Thanatos was completely different from him.
While this is…
It was creating, that was all I knew for now. Perhaps even Magnus could be nothing compared to it.
And me…
I was standing inside a Sacred Domain created by it.
"What do you want from me? " I asked in a stern tone, trying not to show my fear.
"Your past, your present, and your future. "
These three words... sank into me.
At first I didn't understand. Or I didn't want to understand. Because it didn't feel like a request. It was more like a claim. It wasn't as if it was demanding something from me, but rather saying it would take back something that already belonged to me. A sense of unease rose within me—but it was not the kind of fear I had felt in battle. That woman's attacks, Magnus's destruction... all were concrete. They were things that could be seen and felt. This, however... was abstract. But this abstraction did not make it any less dangerous.
On the contrary…
It was even more frightening.
"My past..." I thought involuntarily. Images appeared in my mind. My training. Shu. What he taught me. The moments I learned to stand up. The times I faced my weakness. And then... Magnus. Those strange, dark but instructive times I spent with him. They all suddenly surfaced in my mind. The worst part was the ones before that, my family life. But those memories... didn't feel like they belonged to me at that moment. It was as if someone were displaying them in front of me.
"My present moment…"
This thought felt heavier. Because it was about who I am. What I do, what I believe in, what I stand for... all of it was in this moment. I don't want to protect people. I don't want them to love me. I don't want to be a hero... These desires of mine, these contradictions of mine... they were all in the "now".
And then...
"I will come..."
I stood there.
Because that part... was blank.
It hadn't been written yet.
Or so I thought.
My heart raced. My breathing involuntarily deepened, but this did not bring me any comfort. On the contrary, it made the pressure inside me even more evident. I couldn't take my eyes off Thanatos.
"What does this mean? " I asked finally, my voice slightly more out of control this time. I was trying to suppress the fear, but I couldn't completely hide it.
Thanatos bowed his head slightly when he heard my question. This gesture was like a teacher looking at a student... but with a strange patience within it. As if he had already been expecting me to ask this question.
And then...
He raised his hand.
But even this movement was not ordinary.
His fingers slowly opened in the air. And at that moment… the air around him thickened. As if something invisible were gathering around his palm. My eyes involuntarily locked onto that point.
First of all…
A skull had formed.
But this was not an ordinary piece of bone. Its surface was smooth, yet it had fine cracks on it. A faint, pale light was seeping through these cracks—but this light... was not warm. It was cold. It was empty. The eye sockets of the skull were dark, but that darkness... when looked into, gave the impression of something looking back. It was as if this wasn't just an object... it was an "end."
The most striking feature was that the skull had long hair resembling mine on its head, but they were a faded yellow color.
Then…
A dark red liquid appeared on the other side of its palm.
In a bottle.
The glass bottle was old. Its surface was covered in scratches, and the cap looked rusty. The liquid inside... it didn't take long for me to realize it was blood. But this blood... it wasn't motionless. It was gently undulating. It seemed to be breathing on its own. Its color was dark, almost black. The moment I looked at it… I felt a heaviness inside me. A familiar heaviness.
And finally…
A key.
It was golden in color, but not shiny. It had a matte, heavy, and ancient appearance. It bore intricate carvings and symbols. These symbols were not fixed—they seemed to change as I focused my gaze on them. The form of the key was simple, but the feeling it conveyed was heavy. It felt less like something that would open a door and more like a tool that would "determine" something.
Thanatos raised his hand slightly.
Three objects... hovered in the air.
Skull.
Blood vial.
Key.
And then it spoke.
"This," he said, his voice again in that calm but deep tone, "is yours. "
My gaze shifted between the objects.
My throat went dry again.
I wanted to say, "This is nonsense..." but the words wouldn't come out right.
Instead, I asked, "Which one is which? " without taking my eyes off him.
Thanatos smiled slightly.
And he pointed one by one.
First the bottle.
"This…" he said, "is your past."
My heart paused for a moment.
The blood in the bottle seemed heavier at that moment.
As if every drop inside contained every memory I'd lived through.
Then it turned to the key.
"This one is..." he continued, "the present tense. "
The key turned slightly in the air. The symbols on it became momentarily clearer.
And finally...
He looked at the skull.
There was a short silence.
Then…
"And this…" he said.
This time his voice came out slower.
"Your future. "
Something inside me… fell.
My eyes involuntarily locked onto that skull.
And that moment…
This was the first time I was truly afraid.
"I don't understand anything, Thanatos! What do you hope to achieve by telling me these things?"
Thanatos placed the skull on the ground, then placed the key on the ground as well.
He opened the vial containing the blood and slowly poured it over the skull. The hair on the skull was now red, and blood was flowing down its head. Some of the blood was also dripping onto the key.
Thanatos spoke to me as he performed this procedure slowly.
"I am teaching you, my child. It is understandable that you do not trust me right now. You are doing the right thing. Therefore, let us sign a contract with you."
Right after saying these, before I could even react, he said a different word.
"System. "
The system window opened before his eyes, and it was different from the system I could use. As far as I know, both Magnus's and my system windows were blue. His was yellow. I wondered why. However, before I even had the chance to think about it, my own system window appeared in front of me.
[The God of Death will not do anything to harm the King of Thunder.]
[The God of Death and the King of Thunder will be able to communicate with each other.]
[The God of Death will share one of his powers with the King of Thunder.]
[The King of Thunder will listen to the God of Death until the end.]
"God of… Death?"
After finishing all the blood in the bottle in his hand, Thanatos threw the glass bottle behind him and answered after the sound of it breaking was heard.
"That's right, that's my real identity. Thanatos is just a name for formality. I use this so that you and your kind can understand me. I am among the gods, possessing the power to personify death. I have mastery over all things related to death. The death story of any being is chosen and brought into existence with my permission. "
It was very difficult for me to process what they said. Just realizing that a god was standing before me and communicating with me was enough to make my eyes and even my body tremble.
"You—you… are God. "
Under Thanatos, a piece of stone slowly rose and sat upon him. He took the skull fragment from the ground, its hair soaked in blood, and placed it in his lap, beginning to stroke its hair.
"Three moments: There are three moments in your life where death has had an impact. The Non-Shining Child. " While saying this, his voice seemed to gradually overwhelm me with the scent of the space we were in. My nose was burning. The way he called to me like this hurt me.
"Don't call me that! "
My voice... exploded.
With the lightning that spread from my hand, my spear formed quickly, and I threw it with all my strength into the center of his face. The moment my spear hit his face, it turned into tiny particles of dust.
My eyes widened like saucers. It felt as if I had thrown cotton at him.
"If you accept the contract… We can begin our pleasant conversation, my child. "
The tone in which he said this... it wasn't just disdain. It was worse. The moment I first noticed it, all my familiar definitions of "power" in my mind began to crumble. Because disdain, at least, establishes a hierarchy. There was a place above and one below. But what I felt in that place was that such an order never existed. It was as if I wasn't even a "being" within its field of vision, but merely a pre-written line. This wasn't possessiveness either; possessiveness at least means "you exist." This, however, was something quieter, something more absolute: "You are already defined. " And this thought crushed all the sense of freedom within me for the first time in a real way. It was as if my will were looking directly into an eye, and that eye was telling me, "You cannot choose this."
I took a step back.
But I didn't really make that move.
My body had gone back, yes, but my mind had already withdrawn long ago. It was as if I was moving away not from my current location, but from my own being. At that moment, I realized that fear doesn't always shout. Sometimes it merely changes distance. And at that moment, even within myself, I couldn't distance myself from him. Because no matter how far I went back, his presence didn't extend beyond where I was; on the contrary, it was expanding inward. This thought tightened my stomach even more. Running away seemed like a solution, but was there even an "outside" I could escape to anymore? I wasn't even sure about that.
Contract.
The word began to spin repeatedly in my mind. It wasn't just a simple word; it was like a door opening inside my head. With each repetition, it became a little more real. It made sense. In fact, it made too much sense. Even this was disturbing in itself. Because things that should be dangerous usually didn't look this clear, this orderly. Knowing my past… seeing my present… touching my future… this sounded like power. Knowledge was always power. I had learned this from Magnus. I had learned it from Shu. In fact, everything I had experienced confirmed it. Maybe this was something that would complete my missing pieces. Maybe it would make me more prepared when I returned to Cistern. Maybe it would make me look less "weak" in Aurelia's eyes. Maybe, finally... I would truly understand myself.
But all these "maybe"s became suffocating after a point.
Because each one was based on the same assumption: this contract is my personal gain.
And the quiet voice inside me rejected this for the first time so clearly.
"This is not true."
I hadn't said this out loud, but its echo in my mind was clearer than Thanatos' voice. The contract could give me information, yes. But information alone was not innocent. How information was conveyed and by whom was as important as what the information was. And this entity... was not offering to "give" me information. It was offering to "shape" information for me. This distinction shifted the entire balance in my mind. Because knowing no longer felt like an action... it began to feel like a surrender.
My past...
My present...
My future...
All three of these were the boundaries of what I called "myself". And he held these boundaries in his hands. This thought opened a strange void within me. It was as if I didn't feel myself as a whole, but rather as pieces separated by someone. And the worst part... I no longer even knew whether these fragments belonged to me. It was as if what I called my story had already been written, and I was just a figure moving within it.
I thought about Magnus.
His coldness, his distance, his sometimes seemingly ruthless frankness... all of it was somehow human. Because Magnus, no matter how destructive he was, always left me with a sense of choice. I could reject him, I could argue with him, I could oppose him. But this entity... left me no room to object. It wasn't just speaking; it was defining. And once something is defined, it can no longer be a subject of debate.
I thought of Shu.
His teaching.
The discipline, control, and balance that it taught me... all of it seemed more fragile now. Because even the things Shu taught offered a "path." But this being... it didn't guide the way. It said the path had already been laid out. And this wasn't guidance... it was a closing.
I thought of Cistern.
I needed to return there.
There were tasks. There were people. There was a war.
But even this thought was no longer as clear-cut as before. Because if I stayed here… if I accepted this contract… I could change not only my duties but also my "why." And this possibility was more frightening than physical death. Because at least in death, the story would end. But here... the author of the story could change.
And then...
Would I still be "me"?
This question lodged itself in my mind.
If I refused… maybe I could be saved.
But what did "being saved" mean?
Was it running away?
Or is it better not to know?
And not knowing...
Sometimes it was the safest thing.
But it was also the most dangerous.
The sense of heroism within me stirred. The part of me that wanted to protect people was saying, "Accept it," because power always seemed like the answer. But at the same time, my survival instinct was telling me to "run" because this entity was more than just power; it was an entire system. And if I were to become part of that system... I could no longer be the savior, but someone who was controlled.
But the deepest thing...
It wasn't any of them.
There was only a silent awareness.
"This being... already knows your story."
And this sentence was even more painful than fear itself.
Because if my story is already known…
I'm not just someone walking through it.
I... am already a read page.
Therefore...
"So be it, God. I accept. "
[You Have Accepted the Agreement. ]
Thanatos merely moved his hand without changing his expression, then snapped his fingers.
The two objects in front of him disappeared, leaving only the key.
He held the key and showed it to me.
"The you of now is an incomplete and empty part of yourself who doesn't know anything about yourself. You are filled only with the desire to be saved, but you are incomplete. To even call you an entity, we first need to teach you the very definition of existence. You know nothing, nothing about this universe, nothing about yourself. "
He slowly closed his hand, and the key remained in his palm. I was trying to understand what he was saying, and I was trying to listen as per the contract we had made.
Thanatos remained silent for a while.
This silence was not empty, like previous silences; on the contrary, it was the moment when something "decided." As if even the hellish place we were in was realigning itself according to his thoughts. Although the flow of the lava remained the same, it no longer appeared like a stream but rather like the breathing of a being. Even the vibrations within the black columns had fallen into a more regular, more conscious rhythm. Behind those closed eyes, something was not watching me, but all the possibilities that make me up.
Then it spoke.
And the first sentence was not an explanation; it was a framework.
"It's not about you, but for me, life's meaning is..." he said, his voice heavy as if addressing not a single person but existence itself. "It is not a truth discovered by a being. That being merely tries to carve out a place for itself within that truth."
He paused briefly. During this pause, he did not re-evaluate the words; rather, he waited to see what they would become in my mind.
"You," he continued, "define life as a rescue operation. "
This sentence wasn't harsh. But it was disturbing. Because it was true, and the truth didn't belong to me.
"You want to save people," Thanatos said, his voice neither judgmental nor praising—it was worse, it was observant. "But you think those you save will make you whole. Yet you... feed on the reflection of the void within them."
He paused for a moment.
Then he added:
"That's why you want to shine."
This word sank into me. To shine... as if it were not a goal but the aesthetic manifestation of a deficiency.
"But you," he said slowly, "are not a shining light."
Even though I tried to suppress my reaction, my body wouldn't let me. My breathing became heavy. Because this wasn't an insult; it was presented as a "definition."
"You," he continued, "are a void that thinks it carries light. And voids… do not produce light. They only reflect it. "
With this sentence, the space around us suddenly seemed to shrink even further. It was as if even the universe was listening.
Thanatos bowed his head slightly.
"Your current state…" he said, "is not a goal. It's a lack of direction. "
A brief pause.
"And lack of direction… always turns into something. "
When you said this sentence, I thought of the individual characteristics of the people I had studied and learned about in the Sacred Domain called Earth over the course of two years. Because his voice was almost as heavy as the texts written by philosophers; it contained an element reminiscent of the flow of Heraclitus, the abyss of Nietzsche, perhaps even the shadows of Plato. But it didn't quite resemble any of them. Because he wasn't thinking—he was just saying what he knew.
Maybe, unlike me, someone who had studied all their life wouldn't think that way. After all, I'm always trying to be cool.
Anyway, I'll ask Aurelia...
"If this gap is not filled," he said, "the light will not go out. "
He fell silent for a moment.
Then he corrected himself:
"It's just that... there will be no light anymore. "
Something inside me trembled.
But Thanatos wasn't done yet.
He raised his hand slightly. And the three objects reappeared: the skull, the blood-filled vial, and the key. But this time, it wasn't just symbols; they carried weight as if they were three layers of existence itself.
"Look," he said.
And he pointed to the first one.
"The past is not a collection of memories. " he said.
"The past is a trace of what was done to you. "
I looked at the bottle. However, his words clouded my vision. He missed my focus.
"I can't see what they called you in your past; your creator must have protected you well. The interesting part is, I can't even mention it. After all, there are beings whose names even the gods dare not utter. "
Magnus could easily utter the name of the Supreme Being. I wonder if the gods cannot utter the name of the Supreme Being, who is superior to them?
Then my focus returned to the bottle.
There seemed to be no movement in the dark red liquid, yet at the same time there was a constant sense of motion. It was as if there was no fixed moment within it.
"You," he continued, "did not know what humanity was like. "
A short silence.
"You... you didn't even know what willpower was. "
His voice deepened.
"Your beginning is not an event of 'humanity.' It is an intervention. "
This word struck me: intervention.
"That's why the past…" he said, "maybe it shows up as blood."
The bottle trembled slightly.
"Because the beginning… wasn't life. It was a typo. "
Then he looked at the key.
His eyes were still closed, but at that moment I felt: he wasn't looking at me, he was looking at "this moment."
"The present moment is not the moment you are living in. " he said.
"The present moment is a narrow window left to you. "
The key turned slowly in the air.
"You aren't making a decision right now," he continued. "You're just operating within the space given to you. "
A brief pause.
"That's why what you call 'freedom'…" his voice grew slightly higher-pitched, "is a very well-designed boundary. "
Something inside me wanted to protest, but the sentence spoke before me.
"You… carry a light." he said. "But light does not choose its own direction. It only illuminates one thing."
And then he looked at the skull.
This time his voice was quieter.
More... definitive.
"Your future is not a possibility." he said.
"Your future is the final form of a completed meaning."
The skull became heavier.
"One day, you might save humanity. " he said.
This sentence squeezed my heart.
But the continuation was even more painful.
"However, that salvation... won't save you."
A short silence.
"Because you will not be the savior."
His voice was almost a whisper.
"You… will be the one who understands what salvation is."
The void inside the skull looked at me.
And Thanatos spoke for the last time:
"Shining is not being light."
He paused for a moment.
"To shine is to accept burning. "
And that moment I understood.
This was not a prophecy.
This was… an explanation of an end I was already in.
That heavy silence within me did not dissipate even after Thanatos's words. On the contrary, each sentence sank into my mind like a separate layer; my past, my present, and my future... it was as if they had truly transformed into three objects held in my hand, and for the first time, I was looking at my own life from the outside. My beginning presented as blood, my moment caught between like a key, my end like a skull... they all seemed to connect to a single line. But instead of feeling trapped by this line, the urge to crush through it outweighed everything else.
Because if this were true... if I really were nothing but a "definition"... then submitting to it was an option, as was resisting. But the thing within me stood in a place too simple to "allow" this. My desire to protect people, my way of clinging to those I love, Magnus's harsh teachings, the broken yet strong legacy Shu left me... all of it was converging into one thing: I wouldn't just be the part of this story to be read.
Without taking my eyes off Thanatos, despite all the fear inside me, I uttered those words. My voice was shaking but it didn't break.
"If my past is a text, my present is a gap, and my future is an outcome..." I said, as the words emerged slowly from my throat, "then I will walk over that text. I will break that gap. And I will rewrite that outcome—not according to the way it was imposed on me, but for those I must protect. Neither my destiny nor the end shown to me can stop me—for I will save the good of this universe for more than the meaning they expect from me. "
Thanatos was smiling as he looked at me. This smile was strangely pleasing to me. Ironically, isn't it? The way God of Death's smile warms my heart.
END OF CHAPTER