"Hachiman-sama…?"
"The hell are you babbling, you dirty son of a bitch?"
The despair on the yakuza's face vanished, but the madness in his eyes was still very much there—actually, it had gotten worse.
"Hachiman-sama, it's really you!"
He threw himself to the ground, bowing so deeply his forehead scraped the floor.
"I'm so grateful you answered my call! I really thought I was going to die!"
His voice was teary, overflowing with gratitude and submission. He was talking to me like I was some kind of god or whatever.
Needless to say, I felt extremely uncomfortable.
'What the hell is this idiot doing?'
"Oh, cut the crap and lift your head."
"I wouldn't dare, my lord. I could never disrespect a Kami by looking him in the eyes."
My head was really starting to hurt, and I was actually considering giving him a solid slash.
It took a lot of patience not to finish what the cursed spirit had started.
'Fiuu! Calm down, Zoro! He's just a panicking idiot. No need to shove Wado Ichimonji up his ass. Calm down.'
I needed to figure out what was happening here and why he was calling me Hachiman.
'Hachiman… I've heard that name somewhere before.'
I went through the nonsense he had said, searching for clues. 'Kami, Hachiman…'
After a moment, I understood what this was about.
'Wait. Is he talking about Hachiman, the Shinto god of war?'
Hachiman, meaning "God of Eight Banners," is the Shinto deity of war and culture, protector of Japan and the imperial family.
Some Buddhists even view him as a manifestation of Shakyamuni.
He's usually depicted as a Buddhist monk, and his symbols are a bow and arrows—the embodiment of his warlike nature.
How I know that? Well, you should know that as a hardcore Japan fan, I've done my exercises.
He is especially venerated by samurai and…
'Yakuzas.'
I looked again at the basta—ahem, sorry—at the yakuza. And I saw that he was trembling.
Not trembling in fear, no.
Through my Observation Haki, I could feel his emotions clearly. These were tremors of ecstasy. He was shaking like a man who believed his god had just appeared before him in the flesh.
'In a way it makes sense, but it's still stupid. This asshole really thinks I'm Hachiman. I don't even use a bow.'
I shook my head, exasperated. "You've got the wrong guy, micro-brain. I'm not Hachiman."
"What are you saying, my lord? Are you feeling alright?"
That comment pissed me off big time.
'He's refusing to understand on purpose.'
"I said I'm not Hachiman, dickhead. Stop calling me 'lord' and stand up so we can talk like civilized people."
I was one step away from losing it—his refusal to listen was pissing me off hard.
"I'm not sure I understand Hachi—"
I snapped.
"HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO SAY I'M NOT HACHIMAN, YOU FUCKING IDIOT?! NOW GET UP BEFORE I MAKE SURE YOU NEVER CAN AGAIN!"
The threat worked, even with my five-year-old voice, because he stood up instantly.
Maybe releasing a bit of Conqueror's Haki helped, but it doesn't matter.
He stood straight like a soldier who had just committed a grave mistake in front of his superior.
I let the silence hang for a few seconds to build tension… and also to calm down.
No joke, he had seriously pissed me off.
A smile grew on my face. "Good…" I said in an amused tone. "Looks like you can finally hold a proper conversation."
"Y-Yes, Lord Hachiman."
And just like that, my hard-won calm vanished.
"I JUST SAID I'M NOT HACHIMAN, YOU MORON!"
He flinched and corrected himself immediately.
"Y-Yes, Lord Mister."
Honestly, seeing a scarred grown man act like a scolded shy child was pretty weird.
'Maybe I went too far.'
Then I remembered who I was dealing with.
'What the hell is wrong with you, Zoro? He's a damn yakuza. Why would you pity him?'
"M-Mister?"
His stuttering brought me back. My irritation was still there, and it bled into my voice.
"What?"
"Sorry to bother you but… if you're not Hachiman, then which kami are you?"
"I'm not a kami." I answered absentmindedly.
"Then you're a spirit?"
Same flat tone. "I'm not a spirit."
"Then you're a yokai?"
"No, I'm not a yokai."
"Then you—"
I didn't let him finish. "Can you stop with the damn questions already? I'm a human. Period."
He looked shocked. "Really?"
"Really."
"But if you're just a normal human, how did you kill that yokai? Me and all my men couldn't even scratch it."
'There it is. Now the real explanation starts.'
"It wasn't a yokai. Well… it was, but it's complicated." I scratched my head, knowing how long this explanation would take.
"Alright! Come with me."
I turned around and started walking.
Hearing no footsteps behind me, I spoke while continuing forward.
"Follow me. I'll explain everything on the way."
My voice startled him.
"Huh? Ah! O-Okay!"
I kept walking and eventually reached the end of the bloody alley.
This time, I could hear the yakuza's footsteps behind me.
"Alright, where should I start?" I didn't bother turning around to ask.
"Um… if I may ask… WHAT WAS THAT MONSTER?!"
"Starting with that? You're really impatient, huh."
I kept walking toward the street where I had left Toji.
"It was a cursed spirit."
"A cursed spirit?"
"Every year thousands of unexplained deaths happen in Japan. Most of them are caused by cursed spirits."
"What? That many? But how come no one knows about them?"
"Shut up, I'm getting there."
I turned a corner and he followed.
"Cursed spirits are born from clusters of negative emotions. Fear, anger, shame, sadness… all those emotions produced by humans create cursed energy. And cursed spirits are born from that energy. They swarm in disaster zones or crowded places. They have existed for a very long time. They are the ones who inspired a good number of Yokai."
"But if there are so many, how come no one talks about them?"
"I dunno, old man. Had you ever seen one before today?"
He quickly realized how stupid his question was.
"Normal people can only see cursed spirits when they're on the verge of death. Otherwise, they're completely invisible."
"I-I see… that makes sense." Then his eyes widened. "Wait—! You killed it in one hit. You clearly weren't in danger. So how did you see it?!"
'Heh. He's not as dumb as I thought.'
"I already told you, cursed spirits come from the negative emotions of humans. But what would happen if some humans had a lot of cursed energy and could control it at will?"
He understood immediately.
"You're saying a portion of the population can see and fight them? That's what you are?"
"To both questions? Yes, and you could say that. They're called jujutsu sorcerers. They're tasked with destroying cursed spirits while hiding their existence from normal people to prevent even more from being born."
He fell silent, thinking hard.
"That makes sense… if people learned there were invisible monsters everywhere in Japan, they'd panic and release even more negative emotions."
'He really is smarter than I thought.'
I continued explaining the basic concepts of jujutsu, though without going into deep details.
After walking for a while, we arrived where I had left Toji and our belongings.
'Time to get to the important part.'
I approached the bike and climbed onto it.
"Good. Now that I've explained all that, we can talk about my compensation."
"Compensation?"
"Well yeah. You didn't seriously think I helped you out of charity, did you?"
Don't forget to spam power stones