I have now been in this world for about 3 months or so... 3 months since becoming this individual called Siegfried, in the world of Averna… the world God had sent me to. The first few days we were here, it was unimaginably insufferable and jarring to understand everything that had happened to both me and my supposed sister… Amaranthine. Amaranthine, what an interesting woman she is. For the first couple of days we were here, we were embroiled in constant mental arguments about the situation we were placed in. But one thing was clear, the time line of things was skewed backwards a few hundred… or thousand years. I could not put my finger on it, but Amaranthine stated the medical equipment, practices, and techniques were those of around 700 A.D., she said, around the Umayyad Caliphate and the Byzantine Empire time. As someone more mechanically inclined, I would've at first glance said 1200's or 1300's based on the architecture of the building. It reminded me of the schematics I memorized for a few of our operations in Western Europe, primarily those in Belgium and the Ruhr in Germany.
What does that mean for us? How limited are we in what we can do in God's mission? We are nobles, the second or third highest class of them, depending on how this world operates. But that doesn't mean we have infinite options. Many times, sons and daughters of these nobles were married off without wills. I am now the son of the Duke and Duchess of Luminareth… or Luminar. Based on the conversations with the maids, butlers, and other servants, it's hard to tell what that means. We need to get our bearings to formulate a plan that is effective for both us and the future of this world to bring it closer to God's grace.
But for these 3 months, Amaranthine has been on a mental high to say the least, and unfortunately, my mental state had a breaking point. Ever since our talk 3 months ago, Amaranthine has been giddy and mentally joyful as they can be… every day. There was no logic behind it, no forward thinking… no purpose outside of self-gratification. I finally had enough of this giant ego trip. I need to say something to steer us in the correct direction, finally.
"Keep your idiocies to a minimum whilst we are still figuring out this world, Amaranthine. You, in your incessant internal monologues, are tiresome; we need strategies, not fantasizing. You and I are in an unknown world, surrounded by unknown people and unknown powers. We have only seen maids and butlers and the occasional what seems like a gardener. We have yet to meet our parents." I finally stated in exhausted exasperation. She was going on about fantasies of power and ecstasy in her mental state for a while now, and it was running on my last nerves. We don't know where we are outside of a vague understanding of what city/region were in, what's happening in the outside world, or why we haven't even met our parents yet. We shouldn't jump to stupid conclusions based on a vague understanding that we are the children of the current reigning Duke and Duchess of the lands.
"I've almost taken into account your entire life, Siegfried, and I can mentally see you have of mine. We both have had our… issues, and we both seemed to have been forced into things that we didn't expect. I, for one, am proud of where I came from and where I ended up. I cannot say the same for you." I stated with pride and indignation, "We've basically been each other's personal punching bags and emotional support machines for the last 3 months… and what seems like we'll be forced together till the day we die. We have time." She stated, feeling she wanted to finalize the few month conversations we've had. I can sense in her emotions that she wanted… no, hoping to be a part of a more productive dialog. But my anxieties couldn't be shaken so easily, unfortunately.
"Yes, yes, yes. We can crawl now, too, which is nice, but we have yet to see each other properly because of the cribs we've been in. I've only seen you when the maids feed us, and it's quite… gross. I knew baby food tasted like shit, but in these times. It's worse than I could imagine." I mentally signed in realized futility.
I knew I was right, but it felt hollow. I wanted… needed to take charge of this situation. Amaranthine's mental state was too fragile, it seemed, and I was the leader of the group that took down her organization, Re:Do-Life. It felt right that I should somewhat atone for killing her. But… because of this situation, I felt empty. Our goals were vague and unscripted. God sent us here as a form of "Last Chance" showing, but it felt empty without a goal. Making this world know him and become better people seems like an easy enough thing to state, but it is extremely difficult to put into action, especially in the bodies of infants. I feel somewhat he is making fun of us… for all my beliefs in the god that actually showed up and was in front of both Amaranthine and me….
"For the man who singlehandedly took down multiple international facilities, forced my company's research back 5 years, and is this, seemingly, military-style and mechanical genius, you sound absolutely pathetic. Yes, we need to come up with a plan, but as you said, we just learned to crawl." She stated, lowering her tone to morph into something more forceful, "We are a whopping 3 months old, and time seems to go by slowly for some reason, because these months have felt like decades. But you just need to calm down. We are in a situation where we need both of our mental states to be in tip-top shape." Finishing her diatribe, feeling her thoughts, hoping I would get where she was coming from.
"I recognize what you're saying from a logical perspective, but it still doesn't help. I…" I stopped my response suddenly, and we both were listening to our surroundings. I heard the door open. It seems like the maids and butlers are here to feed us again…
"Hey, Lovis! You're still Master Amaranthine's butler in training; you must learn to knock first before entering any room." A stern younger woman stated
"Yes, I know, it's hard to kick old habits. You do know I was one of the strongest swordsmen in our lands, right? I am not used to this prim and proper lifestyle like you, Seri."
"No more excuses! Soon she'll be able to think, and you'll need to defend her with your life. But none of that now." Seri stated in a bubbly tone, she slowly walked over towards both of us and said, "Hey, little Siegfried, little Amaranthine, the Duke and Duchess have finally come back to our lands with your elder siblings! We can show them how much you've grown!"