Chapter 220: The Demon Kings Army AttacksThe morning sun had not yet warmed the streets of the royal capital before a sharp, shrill alarm pierced the silence.It was a top-level red alert, and the tolling of a massive bell, accompanied by the roar of magical loudspeakers, echoed over the city:"Alert! Alert! A Demon Kings Army General has been detected leading a raid on the North Gate of the royal capital! All Adventurers level 20 and above, please report to the city walls immediately! I repeat, this is not a drill! The Demon Kings Army is invading!"Inside the mansion of Aldap, chaos erupted instantly.As a noble of the kingdom and a Crusader, Darkness practically launched herself into action, stumbling toward the living room while struggling into her heavy armor.Megumin followed closely behind. Although there was still sleep in her eyes, her staff was already emitting a dangerous red glow, and she appeared unusually excited to finally have a legitimate reason to cast Explosion Magic.However, when the two stood in the living room fully armed, ready to greet their companions and head off to face their fate, they found that aside from a few trembling servants, there was no sign of the three familiar figures."What the hell! Are those three seriously still sleeping at a time like this?!"Darkness gritted her teeth, rushed up to the second floor, and kicked open the door to the first room with a bang.Inside the room, Haru was sprawled out on the large silk bed, clutching a stack of blank stationery with noble crests that he had swiped from Aldap's study the night before."Haru! Get up! The Demon Kings Army is attacking!" Darkness yelled as she ripped off the blanket.Haru slowly revealed a pair of bloodshot but unnervingly calm eyes, his tone as flat as if he were discussing what to have for breakfast:"The Demon Kings Army? Isn't that something for Mitsurugi Kyouya to handle? Doesn't he have a holy sword? My duty is to Lurk and guard. What if a Chivalrous Thief takes advantage of the chaos to steal Lord Aldap's treasures? I have a great deal of professional ethics, you know."Darkness was so angry she nearly fainted, but she turned and kicked open the door to Kazuma's room next door.Kazuma was even worse. He was sitting on the edge of the bed, fanatically counting the loose change he had temporarily confiscated from Aquathe previous night. He didn't even look up when he heard the commotion:"Keep it down, Darkness. A Demon Kings Armyinvasion is a matter for high-level Adventurers. What good would I be going over there other than becoming a snack for the Orcs? I am currently conducting a rigorous asset liquidation, which is also for the future of the team."Finally, the two stormed into Aqua's room.The Goddess of Water was lying on the carpet in a starfish position, clutching the Tear of Aurora tightly to her chest, with a suspicious trail of drool running down the corner of her mouth."Aqua! The Demon Kings Army is attacking the city! As a Goddess, shouldn't you be doing something?!" Megumin couldn't help but poke her stomach with her staff.Aqua rolled over without opening her eyes and mumbled incoherently:"The Demon Kings Army or whatever... let that shiny Mitsurugi guy handle it... I, the Goddess, must guard this gem... This is the treasure of Axel... no, wait, the treasure of all humanity... no one is making me leave this bed..."Watching these three teammates who had completely entered "useless mode," Darknessbegan to tremble slightly from extreme shame and anger, her pretty face flushed red:"You... you hopeless bunch! Everyone has a responsibility for the rise and fall of the nation! If the royal capital falls, what meaning will your gems and money have?!"Haru, who had originally been slumped on the bed like a salted fish, suddenly felt a gear in his brain labeled "long-term meal ticket" start spinning wildly when he heard Darkness's roar about the fate of the nation.Wait a minute.If the royal capital really fell, wouldn't that indefinite meal ticket from Princess Alice become void?Furthermore, if he could perform an earth-shattering feat of merit at this time, wouldn't his status in the royal palace jump directly from parasite to national hero?By then, not to mention walking sideways down the corridors, even if he were to perform Natures Beautyon top of Aldap's head, no one would dare say a word against it!Haru suddenly did a kip-up and flipped off the bed, the decadence in his eyes instantly replaced by a fervor known as utilitarianism."Kazuma! Aqua! Stop sleeping! Get up right now!!"Haru let out a thunderous roar, causing the dust on the ceiling to rain down."What the... Haru, what are you going crazy for..."Kazuma was still clutching that pile of loose change, mumbling with a look of dissatisfaction."You idiot! Do you still not understand?"Haru rushed over and grabbed Kazuma by the collar, his expression fanatical to the point of being a bit of a scum,"This isn't just a Demon Kings Army invasion! This is a walking title, countless bounties, and the adoring gaze of Princess Alice! As long as we show our faces and perform some meritorious deeds in this battle, won't we be able to have whatever we want in the royal capital later? Just think, if we save the country, what is that bit of loose change to you? We're after the national treasury!"Kazuma was stunned for 0.5 seconds, and then the same greedy fire ignited in his dead fish eyes:"The... the national treasury?! That's right! If I become a hero, I can rightfully ask Princess Alice to introduce me to a hundred beautiful girls... Ahem, I mean, for the peace of the nation, I, Satou Kazuma, am duty-bound!""And you, Aqua!"Haru turned to look at the Goddess, who was still rubbing against the gem, his tone full of temptation,"If you perform a meritorious deed, I will go and suggest to the King that your Axis Order be designated as the state religion! By then, people all over the world will have to offer you the most expensive sparkling wine, and you'll have so many gems you can use them to skip stones on water!""Are you serious?! You want to make the Axis Orderthe state religion?!"Aqua sobered up instantly, turning into a blue afterimage. She pulled out her staff from who knows where, looking utterly untouchable and sacred,"In that case, those despicable members of the Demon Kings Army dare to disturb my sleep? They are simply courting death! Haru, Kazuma, let's go! We are going to purify those evil guys!"Darkness and Megumin stared in astonishment at these three, who a second ago were hopeless good-for-nothings and the next second had turned into high-spirited warriors. For a moment, they didn't know whether to complain or be moved."Hey... while having high spirits is a good thing, aren't your reasons a bit too realistic..."Megumin's mouth twitched."Stop talking nonsense! Before that shiny Mitsurugi guy steals all the monsters, hurry up and charge!"Haru and his group rushed hastily up to the thick city walls on the north side of the royal capital. What met their eyes was a scene that would make an ordinary Adventurer's legs go weak:The dark mass of the Demon Kings Army surged forward like a tidal wave, hideous Orcs roared as they battered the city gate, and gargoyles circled in the sky.
Chapter 221: Hero PartyBefore Haru could even finalize his plan to scavenge for loot, Darkness let out a breathless gasp as if she had found a treasure, transforming into a golden meteor and leaping straight off the ten-meter-high city wall.She crashed precisely into the densest formation of the Demon Kings Army.Although her greatsword swung without any accuracy, her perverse aura—screaming "hurry up and ravage me, attack me to your heart's content"—forcefully halted the Orcs' charge."Look! That's the daughter of Dustiness Family! Truly a model for the kingdom, actually charging into the enemy ranks all by herself!"The knights on the wall were stirred to a fever pitch by this scene, drawing their swords and shouting, "Charge! We cannot let that noble lady fight alone!"Meanwhile, Aqua, looking at the wounded soldiers lying helter-skelter on the wall, finally displayed the professional conduct befitting a goddess.She raised her staff high, her body radiating a holy, water-blue light that made people want to kneel in worship:"Humble humans, accept this goddess's grace with gratitude! Heal! Group Heal!"A wide-area rain of healing light fell, and the wounded, who had been screaming in pain, instantly became lively and vigorous; even severed legs were reattached on the spot."Oh, oh, oh! It's a miracle! That blue-haired Archpriest is practically a saint reincarnated!"The Adventurers cheered and jumped for joy, their morale instantly skyrocketing.Just as the Demon Kings Army sensed the situation turning against them and prepared to retreat, and a squad of elite Orcs was attempting to break through from the flank, Megumin stood at the very top of the city wall, her jet-black cloak snapping in the gale."Crimson of the abyss, fire of finality... In my name, let all things return to nothingness! [Explosion]!!"BOOM!!A massive mushroom cloud rose on the flank of the battlefield, and that elite squad didn't even have time to scream before being reduced to dust scattered across the sky.The aftermath of the explosion shook the city wall three times, and everyone was struck speechless by the terrifying power."Too... too strong... Is that girl from the Crimson Demon Clan a monster?""Wait a second, look! That tank knight, that saint priestess, and that Explosion Magic mage... they seem to be from the same party!""Is this the legendary elite party that fought their way from Axel?! They are practically the saviors of the kingdom!"Amidst the near-fanatical praise, Haru and Satou Kazuma, standing in the corner of the wall, appeared exceptionally out of place.Haru was holding the sticky note he had swiped last night, preparing to record the "Record of Commander Haru's Wise Decisions," while Kazumawas planning to use [Lurk] to go onto the battlefield and see if there were any valuable drops to scavenge.Both of them froze in place, still holding their sneaky, thieving postures, while the gazes of worship all around them pricked at their faces like needles."Hey, Haru..."Kazuma stiffly turned his head, lowering his voice, his tone filled with indescribable awkwardness,"Everyone is looking at us. They seem to think the two of us are the core leaders of this superhuman party... Should we jump down and swing our swords a couple of times just to play along?"Haru looked down at Darkness, who was being swarmed by the Demon Kings Army yet had an expression of enjoyment, then at Aqua, who was standing with her hands on her hips accepting worship with her tail practically wagging in the sky, and finally at Megumin, who was lying flat on the ground like a piece of paper after casting her Explosion Magic.Haru felt the near-tangible gazes of worship from the surrounding knights.He knew that if he kept dawdling here with his sticky note, the title of "National Hero" might truly turn into "parasite behind the heroes.""Kazuma, you're right. Since those three women have already set the stage, if we don't go up and take a bow, I'm afraid we won't be able to secure our share of the pay for this performance."Haru lowered his voice, his eyes scanning the chaotic battlefield, and finally locked onto a Kobold at the back of the Demon Kings Army, riding a giant Warg and wearing an ostentatious cape.That guy was brandishing a rusty scimitar embedded with large rubies, cursing at the retreating remnants of his troops.Although it looked aggressive, its shifty, rat-like eyes were darting around uneasily; it was clearly a bully who picked on the weak, a low-level second-generation leader holding a high position."See that Kobold? Kazuma. That's our first-class merit. Look at how cowardly it looks; I bet even you could take it out with a slide tackle."Haru pointed at the target, a scum-like smile curling the corner of his mouth.Kazuma looked where he was pointing, and his eyes instantly lit up:"Oh, oh! That cape! That gem-encrusted scimitar! This is definitely a rich guy in the Demon Kings Army! Haru, you provide cover, I'll use [Lurk] to sneak over, and we'll split it fifty-fifty—no, wait, I take sixty, you take forty!""Less talk, let's catch it first! All troops, listen up—!"Haru suddenly drew the command baton he had swiped from his waist and yelled at the remaining guards below the wall,"For Princess Alice! For justice! We are going to carry out a final decapitation strike! Everyone, cover me!"Haru leaped from the wall.Although the height was only a little over three meters, he still stumbled upon landing.He then quickly formed hand seals, and to cover up his and Kazuma's sneaky behavior, he loudly chanted:"Feel my wrath! [Breath of Wind]! [Dust Storm]!"Suddenly, a gale raged across the battlefield, and sand filled the sky, obscuring vision; the already chaotic rear of the Demon Kings Army instantly fell into a blinded state."Now, Kazuma!"Taking advantage of the swirling smoke, Kazumaactivated [Lurk], and his whole body vanished into the shadows like a nimble mouse.Haru, holding his staff, struck a pose of a peerless master, charging toward the Kobold leader while appearing and disappearing within the sandstorm.However, just as Haru rushed close and prepared to knock this ATM unconscious with the back of his sword, the Kobold that looked so weak suddenly stopped cursing.Its originally cloudy dog eyes flashed with a strange red light amidst the sand, and the Warg suddenly let out a low growl as a terrifying wave of magical energy instantly exploded outward."Awoooo!! Humble insects, do you think that by dressing like heroes you can challenge the great Shadow of the Hellhound, Garru?!"The originally short Kobold's body expanded to twice its size in an instant, and black magic flames ignited on that rusty scimitar; with a casual wave, it unleashed a sword aura capable of tearing up the ground.Haru's smile froze on his face.He watched the terrifying pressure coming toward him and roared frantically in his heart:This guy isn't some second-generation rich kid at all; this is a Demon Kings Army vanguard who was hiding his strength!!"Hey! Kazuma! Retreat! This guy is hacking!!"Meanwhile, Kazuma, who was just about to launch a [Backstab] from behind, had just revealed his figure when he saw a giant wolf claw swatting straight down at his head...
Chapter 222: If They Haven't Planned to Pretend Not to Know Us YetJust as the giant wolf claw, capable of crushing granite, whistled through the air with a howling wind and came within five centimeters of Kazuma's face—which was practically screaming 'I haven't lived long enough'—time seemed to freeze."Wait a minute!! Heroes have something to say too!!"Kazuma let out an ear-splitting scream, and in the next instant, he displayed reflexes that transcended human limits.No drawing his sword, no counterattack; he even skipped the part where he scrambled on all fours.Riding the momentum of the Warg's charge, he dropped to his knees and slid across the dust-and-gravel-strewn battlefield, carving a three-meter-deep trench before coming to a precise halt right between Galru's legs.Thud!With a dull thud, Kazuma slammed his forehead against the ground, hands clasped behind his head in a perfect prostration, his voice so sincere it could move one to tears:"O Great, Wise, and Smooth-furred Lord Galru! Please accept my humble submission! My reckless approach just now was actually to admire your sun-like, dazzling Demon Kings Army majesty from up close! That guy over there who summoned the sandstorm (meaning Haru) is the real mastermind; I'm just an innocent bystander who was kidnapped to be his guide!"This sequence of moves, dubbed the 'Light-Speed Sliding Kneel,' was so fluid that even Galru's violent mana fluctuations stalled for a moment.This Demon Kings Army vanguard officer had lived for decades and seen those who resisted to the death or begged for mercy on their knees, but he had never seen a human beg for mercy so professionally, so self-righteously, and even sell out his teammate so thoroughly in the process."Ho? You..."Galru looked down at the trembling black-haired youth between his legs, his descending claws jerking to a stop in mid-air, his tone tinged with a hint of absurd hesitation."You're saying that guy over there, putting on airs with a baton, is the one in charge?"Haru stood not far away, still holding his staff, the scum smile on his face completely frozen. Watching Kazuma's extremely practiced teammate-selling posture, the veins on his temples throbbed as if they were about to burst.Kazuma, you unprincipled loser! What happened to our sixty-forty split?! Was your heroic spirit flushed down the toilet by the sandstorm just now?!Haru roared inwardly, but his face quickly adjusted its expression.Since Kazuma had already entered no-principles mode, if he, as the tactician, didn't keep up with the rhythm, he might actually end up as this big dog's lunch."Ahem! Lord Galru, please calm your anger!"Haru also quickly stowed his staff, replacing his expression with a professional businessman's smile, even offering an elegant bow:"Just as my guide said, that sandstorm was actually a welcoming ceremony we prepared for you. You see, the Royal Capital's defenses have already been mostly exhausted by that perverted knight and crazy mage. We two brothers are actually peace-lovers Lurking within the human ranks, and we were just about to present you with a detailed map of the royal treasury..."While Haru was spouting nonsense, he winked frantically at Kazuma:Hey! While he's dazed by all this, hurry up and use Steal or some other skill to do something!Galru's none-too-bright dog brain was clearly spinning from Haru's talk of detailed maps and peace-loving.Just as it opened its huge mouth, revealing a row of jagged yellow teeth to let out a wild laugh, Kazuma—who had been lying between its legs like a dead dog—suddenly had a flash of ruthlessness and resolve in his eyes."Now's the time! You damn dog! Die! Drain Touch!!"Kazuma's hands gripped the Warg's furry forelimbs tightly, his previously submissive posture instantly erupting with suction.Galru felt the violent mana deep within his body being sucked into a bottomless black hole, draining away frantically through the soles of his feet."Awooo?! You despicable human! You actually..."Galru discovered to his horror that his bulging muscles were rapidly withering, and even his flaming scimitar had flickered out."Good job, Kazuma! As expected of my best friend!"This was the moment Haru had been waiting for.He lunged forward, his staff no longer just for show as it gathered the remnants of his mana.A magical strike at this range was no joke."Experience my magic's finishing move! [Flame Jet]!!"Boom—!A pillar of scorching fire pierced through Galru's massive chest at point-blank range.Accompanied by a shrill scream, the Demon Kings Army vanguard officer and his Warg were turned into a charred, unrecognizable lump in the explosion.The battlefield fell silent instantly.As the smoke cleared, Haru struggled to maintain a profound-looking pose, his staff still smoldering.Meanwhile, Kazuma collapsed exhausted next to the charred corpse, wiping the black soot from his face as he reached for the dropped gem-encrusted scimitar.However, when the two looked up, expecting the thunderous applause they had anticipated, they found thousands of eyes from the city walls and the battlefield staring dead at them.Those gazes held no admiration or awe; instead, they were filled with... a certain bewildered disgust born from having one's worldview shattered."Hey, did I see that right? That black-haired guy... did he just slide-kneel for three meters and call that Kobold 'Lord'?"A holy knight turned stiffly to his companion."I saw it too... He even said he was just an innocent bystander kidnapped to lead the way... His movements were so practiced it's painful to watch.""And the one with the staff—was he really negotiating a deal for the Royal Capital treasury map? Are these really the heroes of the nation? They're clearly two perverts and spies lurking in the hero's party!"The murmurs spread like a tide.The Holy Maiden image Aqua had built, the paragon image Darkness had established, and the Great Sage image Megumin had created were all collapsing at a visible rate in the face of Haru and Kazuma's light-speed sliding kneel and tactical deception."Lin... Haru..."Kazuma gripped the gem-encrusted scimitar, his hands trembling slightly, his voice laced with despair."It seems... everyone saw. Is our reputation... completely ruined?"Haru looked at Aqua in the distance, who was being worshipped by a crowd of believers and laughing like an idiot, then at the Knights Order here, who were pointing at him with looks of disgust. He silently lowered his head, hiding his own crumbling scum expression."Stay calm, Kazuma. As long as we aren't embarrassed, they're the ones who are embarrassed. Listen, that wasn't a sliding kneel; it was a 'low-profile assault tactic'; that wasn't selling out; it was 'psychological warfare to disrupt the enemy's mind.' Quickly, put the sword away. We need to go regroup with Aqua and the others... if they haven't already planned to pretend they don't know us."
Chapter 223: Shamelessly Going to the Palace for a RewardWith the fall of the Demon King's Army vanguard, Galru, the remaining forces, having lost their commander, completely collapsed under the relentless pursuit of the Knights Order.Sunlight finally pierced through the smoke, spilling over the ravaged battlefield, but this warm light brought a bone-chilling cold to Haru and Satou Kazuma."Ohhh! Lady Goddess! Please accept our gratitude!""Young lady of the Dustiness Family, your selfless charge just now was the very model of a knight!""Miss of the Crimson Demon Clan, please, you must tell us your name; we want to erect a monument in your honor!"Not far away, Aqua was spreading her arms wide, eyes closed like a true holy mother as she basked in the worship of her believers. The smug grin on her face, stretching nearly to her ears, looked incredibly cheap no matter how one viewed it.Darkness stood among the knights with a bright red face. Although she kept saying, "No, this was merely my duty," her eyes were darting around, clearly immersed in the perverted pleasure of having so many people witness her battered state.Meanwhile, Megumin was slumped over the back of a sturdy knight. Though exhausted, she insisted on using her last ounce of strength to point at the distant crater."Remember... that was... the masterpiece of Megumin, the Explosion Mage..."On the other side of the spectrum...Haru and Satou Kazuma walked side-by-side on the road back to the city. The surrounding Adventurers and soldiers cleared a wide path for them as if they were avoiding the plague."Look, it's those two guys.""Tsk tsk, I'll never forget that black-haired guy's sliding kneel for the rest of my life. He's an absolute disgrace to Adventurers.""The one with the staff is even more insidious. He actually tried to defect using the national treasury map. Even though he got the final kill, that traitorous look on his face was just something else."Hearing the undisguised disdain from all around, Kazuma clutched the Jeweled Scimitar tightly to his chest, his head hanging so low it was practically tucked into his crotch. He radiated a dense aura of negative energy."Haru... is this the hero you were talking about? Why do I feel like we're being treated worse than those Orcs were just now? Everyone's looking at us like we're some kind of non-recyclable trash!"Haru took a deep breath, struggling to maintain a shred of dignity. His hands were shaking slightly, but his tone remained firm."Shut up, Kazuma. Those who achieve great things don't sweat the small stuff. Although our reputation among the grassroots has... slipped a little bit, don't forget, who really decides the quality of our meal tickets? It's Her Highness Alice! As long as we present this scimitar and claim it was a trophy won through precise tactical planning, who would dare question our contribution?"Just as he finished speaking, Aqua's clear and incredibly punchable laughter rang out from ahead."Oh my! If it isn't the two'Sliding Kneel Heroes' who begged the Kobold for mercy? Hey, you two, stay away from this Goddess. What if that spineless disease infects my followers? Hehe, everyone look, these two are our party's negative examples!"Aqua pointed at Haru and Kazuma, laughing loudly for the benefit of the surrounding believers, completely forgetting who had just tricked her into fighting in the first place.Haru's face instantly turned darker than the bottom of a burnt pot. He looked at Kazuma and saw that Kazuma's hand had already drifted toward his dagger."Kazuma, stay calm. Once we get the reward, we'll have plenty of chances to show her the cruelty of society. The key right now is... how to shamelessly go to the palace for the reward while the entire city despises us."The grand banquet hall of the palace was magnificent. The long dining tables were laden with delicacies that couldn't be found even in the finest taverns in Axel.The air was thick with the scent of expensive sparkling wine and the boisterous laughter of Adventurers.However, within this festive atmosphere, there was an extremely eerie vacuum zone.In the most remote and dimly lit corner of the banquet hall, Haru and Satou Kazuma sat opposite each other at a lonely little round table.In front of them were only a few plates of cold fried chicken that looked like complimentary snacks and two cups of cheap barley tea."Hey, look over there. That's the legendary 'Sliding Kneel Duo', right?""Shh, keep it down. What if they rush over and start calling you 'My Lord'? I couldn't handle that kind of mental attack.""I really don't understand how that sort managed to get into Lady Dustiness's party. They're single-handedly dragging down the average quality of Adventurers in the royal capital..."Hearing the unrestrained mockery from the neighboring table, Kazuma's hand trembled as he speared a piece of fried chicken. His eyes were as hollow as a soul that had just crawled out of the underworld."Haru... I want to go home. I want to go back to that leaky stable in Axel... At least there, I was just an ordinary loser, not a city-wide recognized piece of trash..."Haru remained expressionless. Though his heart was bleeding internally, as a qualified captain, he could not afford to collapse now."Calm down, Kazuma. That's just the envy of mortals. They're just jealous of our flexible knees and broad vision. As long as we can present that Jeweled Scimitar to—"At that moment, the noisy banquet hall suddenly fell silent.The heavy doors were slowly pushed open. Flanked by Claire and Rein, Princess Alice, dressed in a magnificent gown and shining like the morning light, slowly entered the hall.Every Adventurer held their breath, preparing to receive the praise of this pearl of the royal family.Aqua had already struck her most elegant pose with her wine glass, and Darkness stood tall, chest puffed out, ready to be decorated.However, after Alice's clear eyes scanned the room, they didn't linger on those heroes. Instead, she walked straight through the crowd toward that dark corner.Under the gaze of hundreds of stunned eyes, the noble Princess actually pulled out a chair and sat directly in front of Haru and Kazuma."Big Brother Haru, Big Brother Kazuma. Why are you sitting in a place like this? I've been looking for you for ages."Alice's face wore a pure and radiant smile, her sparkling eyes filled with undisguised admiration and concern."I heard from Rein. During that battle, it was you two who personally went deep behind enemy lines, using incredible tactics and courage to lure out the leader of the Demon King's Army and then personally slew it. That was truly magnificent!"The hall was silent—a deathly silence.The Adventurers who were just mocking the two now had their jaws on the floor."Tac... Tactics?" Claire stood behind her, clutching her forehead, her voice trembling. "Your Highness, that was clearly—""That was a very sophisticated luring tactic, right, Claire?"Alice turned her head, her gaze flashing with an unquestionable authority, before she looked back at Haru with tenderness."To protect the royal capital, you were even willing to sacrifice your own reputations to deceive the enemy... Such resolve truly moves me."Haru looked at the "unlimited meal ticket" in front of him who seemed to view the world through a rose-tinted filter. The utilitarian gears in his brain instantly went into overdrive.He suddenly straightened his back, the decadence on his face vanishing instantly, replaced by the saintly glow of one who had endured great humiliation for a noble cause."Your Highness, you flatter us."Haru spoke in a deep, magnetic voice, casually placing the Jeweled Scimitar on the table with a sharp clink."As long as we can protect your smile, what does a little reputation matter? Even if the whole world misunderstands us, as long as Your Highness understands our intentions... that is enough."Kazuma was stunned for a tenth of a second, but then immediately caught on and wiped away a non-existent tear."Yes, Your Highness! You have no idea how much my heart ached the moment I knelt down! But to ensure Big Brother Haru could land the finishing blow, I endured it!"
Chapter 224: The Soul Exchange NecklaceEven though Princess Alice's saint-like concern had formed a field of 'Royal Protection' around Haru and Kazuma, the world outside that field remained full of malice.At the other end of the banquet hall, Aqua was standing on a table performing her signature Natures Beauty. Clear streams of water gushed from her fingertips, transforming into a brilliant rainbow and drawing cheers from the surrounding Adventurers.Darkness was surrounded by a group of hot-blooded knights. Although she was showing a distorted and perverted flushed expression because she was being praised as the kingdom's'Sturdy Shield,' to the onlookers, it appeared to be merely the humility and excitement of a noble knight.As for Haru and Kazuma, aside from the snacks Alice occasionally handed over, their surroundings remained as desolate as a cursed graveyard."Haru, I can't take it anymore... My soul has been worn thinner than the floor I just slid on."Kazuma weakly set down the cheap barley tea in his hand, his eyes reflecting the weariness of someone who had seen through the vanity of the world."I'm going back to my room. I'm going to hold that jeweled scimitar and rebuild my dignity in my dreams. Every time a cheer rings out here, my heart breaks a little more. You should come back early too, though I suspect a thick-skinned guy like you might not even have a heart."After saying this, Kazuma wobbled out of the banquet hall like a wandering ghost under Alice's worried gaze.Haru watched Kazuma leave, his lip twitching slightly.He had no intention of going back to rest so early.A place like the royal palace was full of undiscovered opportunities everywhere."Your Highness, I would also like to go to the garden to clear my head and reflect on my mistakes during the battle just now."Haru bowed elegantly to Alice, the expression on his face so sincere that he almost believed it himself."Alright, Big Brother Haru, please don't blame yourself too much. In my heart, you will always be the bravest."Alice waved her small hand in farewell, her eyes full of heartache.Stepping out of the noisy banquet hall, the cold moonlight spilled onto the meticulously manicured palace gardens.Haru took a deep breath of the cool night air, feeling the concentration of 'Aqua' in his lungs finally decrease significantly.He walked aimlessly along the corridor, trying to find some decorations that looked valuable.Just as he was passing a secluded terrace, a slight metallic clinking sound caught his attention.Haru held his breath, activated his sharp senses as an Adventurer, and quietly peeked out.At the edge of the shadow-shrouded terrace, a petite and nimble figure stood with her back to him, skillfully rummaging through the base of a decorative statue on the terrace.The person wore a lightweight green cloak, her short silver hair shimmering in the moonlight, and a signature Thief's dagger hung at her waist."Strange, the intel clearly said that dangerous divine artifact was in this area... Has it been hidden somewhere deeper?"The voice was crisp and tinged with a hint of distress; even in self-muttering, it possessed a likable vitality.Haru's eyebrows twitched. This familiar back, this signature voice..."Yo, isn't this Chris? So the capital's Chivalrous Thieflady doesn't sleep in the middle of the night and sneaks into the palace for some work-study?"Haru folded his arms and slowly stepped out from the shadows, a trace of an inscrutable scum smile on his face.The figure stiffened suddenly, then jumped up like a startled rabbit. She turned around in a panic, and upon seeing it was Haru, her pretty face—marked with a faint scar—instantly turned bright red, her eyes darting around erratically."Waaah! Y-you, why are you here?! No, I-I'm just... well, I'm here to look at the scenery! Right, the palace night view is truly wonderful, haha, hahaha..."Chris laughed nervously as she tried to use her cloak to hide the statue base she had half-pried open. Her extremely guilty appearance practically had the words 'I am a Thief' written on her forehead.Haru was in no hurry to expose her. Instead, he leisurely leaned against a nearby white marble pillar, observing the flustered Chivalrous Thief with an expression as if he were watching a circus performance."Looking at the scenery to the point of prying up the floor? Chris, your spirit for researching palace architecture truly fills me with respect."Haru let out a light chuckle, his tone full of mockery."Tell me, what exactly are you looking for? If you don't give a reasonable explanation, I can't guarantee that a patrolling guard won't happen to pass by in the next second. After all, I am now a hero who saved the country, as personally acknowledged by Princess Alice. Reporting an intruder would carry quite a bit of weight."Hearing the word 'guard,' Chris shrank her neck in fear. She dejectedly put down the crowbar in her hand, her beautiful large eyes filled with conflict and pleading. Finally, she leaned in close to Haru and whispered:"Fine, fine! I'll tell you! Just don't call the guards, definitely don't call the guards! Actually... I'm tracking a very dangerous divine artifact called the Soul Exchange Necklace. It was originally something from the Heavenly Realm that accidentally fell into the mortal world. As long as the person wearing it makes eye contact with another person and recites an incantation, their souls will swap!"Chris became increasingly serious, her playfulness vanishing and replaced by a god-like sense of responsibility (though in Haru's eyes, she looked more like a child who had lost a toy):"Think about it, if this kind of thing were taken by someone with impure intentions and used to swap bodies with His Majesty the King or Princess Alice... wouldn't the whole country be finished?! I just sensed its presence nearby... Haru, you're smart, can you help me?"Haru had been listening absent-mindedly, but when the terms 'Soul Exchange Necklace' and 'Princess Alice' collided in his mind, his brain felt as if it had been struck by a Thunderbolt. Images of seeing Alice in the Great Hall this afternoon flashed through his mind.That little princess in her magnificent dress indeed seemed to have been wearing an ancient-looking necklace set with a strange sapphire.At the time, he thought it was just ordinary royal jewelry, but thinking back now, the fluctuations emitted by that gem were indeed somewhat abnormal..."Hey, Chris."Haru's expression became a bit strange. He pointed toward the depths of the palace in the direction of Alice's bedchamber."That necklace you mentioned, does it look like a teardrop-shaped sapphire with silver wing-like decorations on the base?"Chris's eyes widened suddenly. She grabbed Haru's arm with surprisingly great strength."Yes, yes, yes! That's the one! You've seen it?! Where is it? Take me there, quick!"Looking at Chris's urgent state, Haru began a frantic deduction in his mind.If that thing really was around Alice's neck, then things were about to get interesting.Alice seemed very fond of that necklace; if he went to ask for it directly, it would definitely arouse suspicion.If he let Chris steal it... with her clumsy infiltration skills, if she happened to alert Claire, he, as an accomplice, would also be in trouble.More importantly, if that useless Kazuma found out about this thing's existence, with his scumpersonality, he would absolutely find a way to swap bodies with Alice and then enjoy the royal life over there, wouldn't he?
Chapter 225: Blatantly Blackmailing a GoddessThe breeze on the terrace carried the chill of late night. Haru was just about to open his mouth and propose some slightly excessive conditions for his assistance to Chris when a youthful voice, tinged with a hint of surprise, drifted out without warning from the shadows behind them."Chivalrous Thief...? Could it be that you are that silver-haired Chivalrous Thief lady from the folk rumors, the one who specializes in punishing corrupt officials and robbing the rich to give to the poor?!"Haru's scalp went numb for a moment. He spun around abruptly and found that Her Highness Alicehad quietly followed them at some point.The little princess stood there with her hands clasped over her chest, her eyes sparkling with a light of admiration more brilliant than the stars in the sky. That expression... was exactly the same as when she watched Haru enduring humiliation for a greater cause."Waaaah! G-Guards! No, wait, Your Highness?!"Chris was so startled that she jumped directly onto the terrace railing, looking like a kitten with its fur standing on end. The crowbar in her hand fell to the ground with a crisp clatter.Her pretty face turned pale then red, and then red then pale again under the moonlight."No, no, no, you misheard! I'm not some Chivalrous Thief. I'm just a passing... passing bricklayer! Yes, I'm checking the quality of the palace's renovations!""Brother Haru, is this the comrade-in-arms you mentioned just now?"Alice completely ignored Chris's full-of-holes excuse. She lifted her skirt, walked elegantly to Chris, and gave a deep bow."I have always yearned for the outside world and have heard the stories of the Chivalrous Thief. They say that although the Chivalrous Thief dwells in the darkness, their heart is turned toward the light. I didn't expect you to be Brother Haru's friend. As expected, excellent people always attract one another!"Haru looked at Alice's extreme sincerity and trust, his mouth twitching as he looked at Chris. Chris was currently crouching on the railing, unable to leave and unable to stay. Facing the princess's pure and innocent praise, her conscience as a goddess was suffering unprecedented torment, and she even wore a pleading expression as if she were about to cry."Cough, Your Highness, you truly have a keen eye."Haru adjusted quickly. Taking advantage of the situation, he walked to Alice's side and casually kicked the crowbar on the ground into the shadows."That's right. Miss Chris was actually specifically invited by me to recover that dangerous item that was lost. The reason she's dressed like this is entirely to avoid alerting those mediocre guards.""So that's how it is!"Alice nodded in realization. Then, as if remembering something, she gently pulled a necklace from her fair neck. The sapphire within it shimmered with an unusual brilliance under the moonlight."By dangerous item, do you mean this necklace that I found in the treasury a few days ago and felt very close to?"The moment Chris saw the necklace, her eyes went wide, and she almost tumbled off the railing."Ah! That's the one! Your Highness, please be sure to give it to me... No, please be sure to keep it safe! That thing... it eats people!"The atmosphere on the terrace became extremely tense the moment Alice pulled out the necklace.Chris's sharp eyes, belonging to a Thief (Goddess), stared fixedly at the sapphire. She teetered on the railing, her mouth beginning to babble due to excessive nervousness."Y-Your Highness! This necklace is really very dangerous! It... it's actually called the Soul Exchange Necklace! As long as you wear it, make eye contact with someone, and chant the incantation, your souls will go 'whoosh' and swap into each other's bodies! If you happen to make eye contact with a Slime on the road, then the heir to the kingdom will become a lump of gooey liquid!"Chris gestured with her arms while looking like she was about to cry.Her overly blunt explanation made Haru, who was standing to the side, almost unable to resist covering his face—Hey, what kind of infiltrator tells the person involved about the functions of a divine artifact in such detail!"Exchanging souls...? Such an incredible thing exists?"Alice let out a gasp of wonder. She looked down at the necklace on her chest. Not only was there no fear in her eyes, but a dangerous spark called curiosity was flickering within them."If that's the case, we certainly can't let bad people take it away. Since Miss Chris infiltrated here just to recover it, then this dangerous item should be given to..."Alice's slender fingers rested on the necklace's clasp, making a move to unfasten it and hand it to Chris.Chris's eyes instantly lit up like two high-powered light bulbs. She leaned forward, her hands trembling as she reached out, as if she could already see the dawn of her mission's completion.However, just as Chris's fingertips were about to touch that faint blue light, a long and powerful hand intervened, firmly pressing down on Alice's wrist."Wait a moment, Your Highness."Haru's deep voice, carrying a hint of indisputability, rang out on the terrace.He turned slightly, blocking the path between Chrisand Alice, wearing an extremely elegant yet scum-like smile that made Chris's heart hair stand on end."Brother Haru?" Alice looked up in confusion."Hey! Haru! What are you doing! Quickly let me take it!"Chris was so anxious she stomped her feet on the railing, lowering her voice to hint frantically.Haru ignored Chris's frantic state and instead took the heavy necklace from Alice's hand. His fingertips gently rubbed the cool surface of the gem, and a light of calculated cunning flickered in his eyes."Your Highness, although Miss Chris is an excellent Chivalrous Thief, a divine artifact of this level might generate violent magic fluctuations during the recovery process. For your safety, please allow me to evaluate it first. After all, if it were handed directly to this clumsy Miss Thief, and she accidentally triggered the incantation while climbing a wall, the consequences would be unimaginable."At this point, Haru turned his head and winked at Chris, who was staring dumbfoundedly with a face that screamed 'do you want to keep it for yourself'. His tone became meaningful."Isn't that right, Miss Chris? Such a heavy responsibility... without sufficient sincerity and compensation to back it up, it's very hard for me to feel at ease handing it over."Chris froze on the spot. She finally understood—this scum of a man was actually blatantly blackmailing a (down-on-her-luck) goddess right in front of the princess!The moonlight on the terrace stretched the shadows of the three of them very long.Alice looked at Haru's expression of risking himself for justice and safety, and she was so moved she almost shed tears.She completely failed to notice the undercurrent of blackmail and extortion flowing between these two older siblings."So that's it. Brother Haru has considered everything so thoroughly."Alice clasped her hands in front of her and nodded obediently. Then she turned to look at Chris, her eyes full of expectation."Then, Miss Chris, since the necklace is being kept by Brother Haru, you must come to the palace to visit me often! I also want to learn how to... um, how to elegantly flip floorboards like a Chivalrous Thief!""Ahaha... definitely, definitely... as long as I'm not caught as an assassin..."Chris laughed dryly, her expression looking even worse than if she were crying.Alice gave a few more instructions about staying safe and the like, and then, under the urging of a distant lady-in-waiting, she reluctantly lifted her skirt and left the terrace.As that magnificent figure disappeared at the end of the corridor, the air on the terrace instantly dropped to the freezing point.
Chapter 226: Is This What They Call a Blessing in Disguise?Chris suddenly jumped down from the railing, rushing in front of Haru like a kitten with its fur standing on end, and roared in a low voice:"Hey! You scum who takes advantage of others' misfortunes! Give me back that necklace! That's a god... that's a very dangerous thing, not a toy for you to play with!"Haru slowly spun the sapphire necklace around his thumb once. Then, right in front of Chris, he naturally tucked it into the inner lining pocket of his chest, even giving it a provocative pat:"Sincerity, Chris. I told you before, I can't carry such a heavy responsibility involving the fate of a nation without sufficient compensation. For example... how about teaching me that Steal skill that can swipe underwear? Or promising me three slightly excessive requests?"Chris trembled with rage, pointing at Haru's nose for a long time without being able to speak.But just when Haru thought she was about to explode, the silver-haired Thief suddenly calmed down.She squinted at Haru's bulging pocket, and a meaningful curve actually appeared at the corner of her mouth."Hmph, since you want to keep it so badly, I'll leave it to you then."Chris crossed her arms, wearing an expression that said 'let's see how long you can last'."Anyway, I have other work to handle tonight. But I'm warning you, Haru, the incantation for that thing is actually very simple and easy to trigger by mistake. If you wake up tomorrow morning and find yourself turned into Aqua or Darkness, don't come crying to me to change you back!"After saying that, Chris snapped her fingers with great style, her whole body turning into an afterimage as she flipped over the several-dozen-meter-high terrace and disappeared into the night."Tsk, she runs fast."Haru muttered, feeling the bursts of coolness coming from his chest; those were the fluctuations of a Divine Item.Late at night, Haru returned to Aldap's extremely luxurious mansion.As soon as he entered, he felt an overwhelming aura of uselessness hitting him in the face.In the hall, Aqua was lying ungracefully on the expensive carpet, clutching a bottle of famous wine she had swiped from somewhere, muttering:"Why... why didn't that little girl invite me to the secret seminar... I'm a Goddess..."Megumin was hugging her staff and snoring on the sofa, drool getting everywhere. Meanwhile, Darkness was kneeling before the fireplace, hands tightly clasped, her face wearing a hair-raising flush:"Ah... the way the Adventurers in the Royal Capital look at me... why isn't there that look of disgust, that contempt... like they're looking at a pile of non-recyclable trash... it's wonderful... this kind of mental devastation..."Haru expressionlessly bypassed this group of problem children and headed straight for the stairs.He just wanted to find a quiet place to study this necklace now.However, as he passed Kazuma's room, he found the door ajar.The Sliding-Kneel Hero, who was despised by the whole city, was leaning on the windowsill, staring blankly at the moon. His back looked so desolate it made one want to stick a 'needs comfort' note on it.Looking at Kazuma's desolate back, a rare flicker of sympathy crossed Haru's heart.After all, they were both Reincarnators.He sighed, pushed open the ajar door, and walked in."Yo, Kazuma. Stop acting like a melancholy poet. The moon in the Royal Capital won't get any rounder just because of your embarrassing sliding kneel."Haru leaned against the doorframe. Although his tone was sharp, it carried a bit of comfort.Kazuma slowly turned his head, his gaze as dead as a pool of stagnant water:"Is that you, Haru... leave me alone. Right now I just want to become a roadside Reincarnated Cabbage; at least I'd be making a contribution when I'm eaten. That little princess must be secretly laughing at me in her heart too, right? Heh, Sliding-Kneel Hero, what a fitting title..."Just as Kazuma was wallowing in self-pity, his sense of smell—honed by long-term living at the bottom of society and exceptionally keen for valuable goods—suddenly twitched.His gaze fell upon Haru's collar, which was slightly open from walking, revealing a faint, high-quality blue light."Wa-wait a second."Kazuma's eyes instantly sharpened from their dead state, and he sprang up like a groundhog that had spotted prey."What's that in your shirt? That luster... that ominous yet money-scented fluctuation... Could it be that Her Highness Alice secretly gave you a reward behind my back?!""Hey, calm down, this thing is dangerous, it's not what you think..."Haru was startled and instinctively tried to cover his pocket.But it was too late.Kazuma, who had fallen into an abyss of jealousy wondering why only Haru got the benefits, exploded with an agility far exceeding his level.He lunged forward and grabbed Haru's waist, his hands reaching into Haru's shirt like iron pincers."Stop lying! It's definitely something good! Let me see! Even if it's just to give me half the cash-out value, I haven't even collected my mental distress fee yet!""Let go! You money-grubbing loser! This thing will..."The two of them scuffled in the narrow room.Haru tried to push away Kazuma's face, which was written all over with greed, while Kazuma gripped the silver chain of the necklace tightly.During the tug-of-war, the sapphire necklace popped out with a'snap', tracing a strange arc in the moonlight before hanging exactly in the center of their intersecting gazes.At that instant, the sapphire on the necklace seemed to sense the meeting of their eyes and burst forth with a blinding light.Looking at the complex ancient script, and due to his inexplicable ability to understand otherworldly languages, Kazuma instinctively read out the string of tongue-twisting characters engraved on the base of the necklace:"Soul... Swap? What kind of incantation is this...""Oh no! Shut up, Kazuma!"Before Haru could finish his warning, a massive suction force emanated from the necklace.Hum——!In an instant, Haru felt the world spinning. His consciousness felt as if it were being stuffed into a giant water pump, and then violently hurled into a familiar yet foreign vessel.A few seconds later, the light dissipated.Haru slowly stood up, looked at his slightly rough, calloused hands, and touched his face which was somewhat distorted by jealousy, letting out Kazuma's signature panicked scream:"Waaaaah! My body! My stats! Why have I turned into this useless shut-in who only has a decent Luck stat?!"On the other side, Kazuma looked down at his high-quality Adventurer's outfit, feeling the surging power and other stats within his body, and revealed an extremely scum-like and evil smile:"Oh? Is this what they call a blessing in disguise? Haru, thanks for the treat. I'll be taking this body and these stats for the time being."
Chapter 227: Wearing Someone Else's FaceThe air in the room seemed to freeze for a full three seconds.Kazuma, now occupying Haru's body, first looked at himself in a daze, then tentatively clenched his fist. Accompanied by the crisp popping sound of bones, a surge of powerful energy instantly coursed through his entire body."This... what's going on?"Kazuma (in Haru's body) muttered to himself, but immediately after, his originally slightly hunched back straightened instantly. The corners of his mouth curled upward uncontrollably, pulling into an extremely scum-like, even somewhat lecherous wild grin that made this handsome face look rather wretched."Haha... Hahahaha! I get it! This is the effect of the legendary Divine Item! I am Haru now!"Standing opposite him, Haru (in Kazuma's body) felt his vision go dark.He tried to take a step forward to snatch the necklace from the ground, only to find that this body was as heavy as if it were filled with lead."Hey, Kazuma, you idiot, calm down! Recite the incantation backward immediately!"Haru (in Kazuma's body) growled through gritted teeth, reaching out to grab the other's collar.But Kazuma (in Haru's body) simply leaped backward lightly, easily dodging the clumsy pounce.He looked down at 'himself' sprawled on the carpet, a dangerous glint of petty triumph flashing in his eyes."Recite it backward? Are you kidding me! I'm not going back into that trash body that can't even beat a Slime!"Kazuma (in Haru's body) spun around excitedly, then a flash of inspiration crossed his mind. He slapped his hands together, his eyes becoming incredibly dark and excited."That's it! Claire! That arrogant female knight who looked at me like I was trash in the banquet hall today! If it's me now... no matter how excessive or humiliating the request I make of her, she won't be able to refuse, right?!""Is your head filled with non-recyclable waste?! Don't use my face to make such a lewd expression!"Haru (in Kazuma's body) broke out in a cold sweat. He knew Kazuma's bottomless character all too well. Once this guy was allowed to harass the noble knights of the Royal Capital while wearing his face, the name Haru would become a synonym for pervert by tomorrow morning!"Just reflect obediently in that useless body! I'm going to make that proud female knight serve me tea, pour me water, massage my legs and back, and finally, make her cry while apologizing to me, ahahaha!"With a burst of extremely arrogant wild laughter, Kazuma (in Haru's body) yanked open the door and rushed out like a gale, moving so fast he left only an afterimage in the hallway."Stop! You scumbag!"Haru (in Kazuma's body) roared and scrambled out on all fours to give chase.However, after only a few steps out of the room, he felt his lungs gasping like a bellows, and his legs felt so weak they seemed ready to go on strike at any moment."Huff... huff... Damn it... What kind of scrap metal body is this..."Haru leaned against the hallway wall, panting heavily, feeling deeply shocked by Kazuma's daily state of existence.With this little stamina, how does this guy usually survive attacks from Demon Kings Army Generals?!But there was no time to complain now. From the stairs at the end of the hallway came the sound of Kazuma's footsteps, which were deliberately lowered but couldn't hide his excitement. He clearly intended to sneak into the Royal Palace or Claire's station overnight for revenge.Haru (in Kazuma's body) gritted his teeth and exhausted the remaining strength of this body to chase toward the stairwell.He had to stop that loser before he did something irredeemably perverted with his body. If all else failed, he wouldn't even hesitate to knock himself out using Kazuma's body!By the time Haru (in Kazuma's body) scrambled out of the manor gates, the night was already deep.At the edge of the neatly manicured lawn of the station, the originally solemn and sacred atmosphere was being completely ruined by an extremely obnoxious voice."Yo! Isn't this our proud, holy, look-at-people-with-her-nostrils Lady Claire? Still on patrol in the middle of the night, it's so hard-working it makes one want to shed tears, pfft."Kazuma, occupying Haru's body, was currently leaning against a stone pillar at the station entrance with one hand in his pocket and his head tilted.He even struck a showy pose, despite it being the middle of the night.That originally handsome face, under the control of Kazuma's soul, was now twisted into an extremely punchable, scum-like smile that practically begged for a slap."L-Haru-dono?!"Claire, who had just finished her patrol and was about to remove her armor, suddenly stopped in her tracks.This female knight, who was usually as cold as frost, now wore an extremely complex and confused expression as she looked at the person before her."You... what is with that outfit? And that tone... have you not sobered up from the wine at the banquet?""Wine? No, no, no, I'm very sober right now. I can even calculate exactly how many grams of fabric were used for your underwear in my head."Kazuma (in Haru's body) scrutinized Claire's graceful figure wrapped in silver armor with extreme boldness, even letting out a light, flirtatious whistle."What, weren't you quite impressive in the great hall today? 'An Adventurer should act like an Adventurer'? Come, I'll show you right now what an Adventurer looks like. If you kneel and beg me now, maybe I'll consider putting in a good word for you before Her Highness Alice to spare you from tomorrow's toilet-cleaning duty, hmm?""You... what disrespectful things are you saying!"Claire's pretty face instantly turned beet red, a color born of both shame and fury.Although she held basic respect for Haru, her pride as a Royal Guard would never allow herself to be trampled upon like this.She suddenly pressed her hand onto her sword hilt, her silver armor letting out a crisp clinking sound under the moonlight."Even if you are a favorite of Her Highness, insulting a Royal Guard is a serious crime! Please retract your wretched statement immediately, otherwise...""Otherwise what? Are you going to duel me here?"Kazuma (in Haru's body) laughed even more wildly. He even extended a finger and poked Claire's pauldron in an extremely provocative manner."Come on, hit me, hit me right here. If you lose, you'll have to put on that set of very skimpy clothes I've prepared and pour wine for me tonight, how about it?""Impudent scoundrel! It seems you really have gone mad!"Claire finally reached the end of her patience. With a 'clang', she drew her sword. Although it didn't leave its scabbard, the wind generated by the blade's movement ruffled Kazuma's hair.At this critical moment, a panting Kazuma, looking like he had just crawled out of a swamp, finally flipped over the wall and crashed into their field of vision."St... Stop! You... you idiot who's going into heat while wearing someone else's face!"Haru (in Kazuma's body) leaned on his knees, feeling as if his lungs were about to explode.He looked at Claire's impending explosion of rage, then at his own body which had been ruined beyond recognition by Kazuma. Only one thought remained in his mind: if he didn't get his revenge today, his name wasn't Haru!
Chapter 228: The Scent of Justice"Fine, very well. Satou Kazuma, since you intend to completely destroy Haru's image, then there's no need for me to preserve that pathetic dignity of yours."Haru (in Kazuma's body) slowly straightened up, his gaze becoming exceptionally cold and deep. Although it looked somewhat discordant on Kazuma's rather plain face, the overwhelming scumaura instantly eclipsed the opposition."Lady Claire! Please do not be deceived by this imposter!"Haru (in Kazuma's body) suddenly raised his voice, shouting in an extremely exaggerated, even tearful tone,"Actually, I, Kazuma, have always had a hidden fetish! I actually love collecting the smelly socks discarded by the palace guards, and I sniff them while shouting that this is the fragrance of the Royal Capital! The reason he's flirting with you now is because he thinks there must be a premium pair hidden in your boots!""Huh?!"Claire, who was just about to draw her sword, froze completely, the scabbard in her hand letting out an awkward thud.She looked at the Haru before her, then at the disheveled Kazuma, her brain falling into a logical infinite loop."Oho! Quite the quick counterattack, my sidekick!"Kazuma (in Haru's body) wasn't angry; instead, he let out an excited whistle, his reaction speed shockingly fast,"Since you've put it that way, I can't fall behind! Everyone, come look! This man named Haru actually hugs a pillow printed with Princess Alice's face every night, drooling and shouting 'Hehe, little sister, hehe!' He even secretly embroidered the words 'I am Claire's dog' on his underwear!""You... you two bastards... what on earth are you saying!"Claire's face was so red it looked ready to drip blood. The sword in her hand trembled violently, and she didn't know which one to slash first."I'm not done yet!"Haru (in Kazuma's body) grinned maliciously. He casually picked up a pink handkerchief dropped by someone from a nearby bush and held it high,"Look! This is my, Satou Kazuma's, treasure! I've actually had a secret crush on Dust for a long time, and I even plan to publicly propose to that little punk at the entrance of the Axel Adventurers Guild! The reason he's chasing me now is because he's afraid I'll make his love letters public!""Wow! How despicable!"Kazuma (in Haru's body) refused to be outdone. He whipped his cloak back, striking an extremely flamboyant pose,"Then I'll go public too! I, Haru, am actually a hardcore masochist! The reason I work so hard to get stronger is so that one day I can be trampled and ravaged by the female executives of the Demon Kings Army! When I poked your shoulder guard just now, I was actually hinting for you to kick my chin with your toes! Come on, Claire, don't be polite, trample me ruthlessly with your iron boots!"On the lawn below the terrace, two men wearing each other's skins were engaged in a completely unprincipled, insane competition of character suicide.Claire stood in the middle, watching these two men—who were usually useless—slinging mud at each other as if possessed by demons. Her rationality as a knight finally snapped completely."Enough... you two... you two irredeemable perverts!!!"Claire let out a scream loud enough to pierce through the palace, her silver battle aura erupting instantly.Before the echoes of Claire's sky-shattering scream could fade, she turned into a bolt of silver lightning, her longsword carrying a bone-chilling cold light as it lunged straight at Kazuma, who was occupying Haru's body.That was the full-force strike of a Lv.45 Crusader; the air even carried a scorched smell from the friction of magic!"Die! You filthy things who defile the palace air!"However, Kazuma, occupying Haru's body, did not dodge.With the enhancement of Haru's powerful body, his scum soul actually produced a feeling of extreme, dangerous excitement.He spread his arms wide, a serene smile on his face that made one want to slap him a hundred times:"Come! Lady Claire! Pierce this sin-filled body with your sword! As long as I can die under your iron boots, I, Haru, can die with no regrets! Hahahaha!""Hey! Kazuma! Dodge, you total lunatic!"Standing behind, Haru (in Kazuma's body) was scared out of his wits.That was his body! If Claire ran a sword through it, even if their souls could be swapped back, he would just be a fresh corpse!Catalyzed by this crisis, Haru's thinking became extremely simple and crude—he had to stop her! By any means necessary!In his desperation, Haru (in Kazuma's body) suddenly thrust out his right hand, Kazuma's signature unprincipled skill flashing through his mind.Because he was currently in Kazuma's body and possessed EX-grade terrifying Luck, the power of this move had, in a sense, transcended causality!"Whatever! Steal!!!"A flash of white light passed.Claire, who had been charging with overwhelming momentum, her sword tip only centimeters from Kazuma's (Haru's body) heart, suddenly froze in a bizarre manner.Her murderous expression solidified instantly, replaced by an extreme, bone-chilling blankness.*Plop.*A piece of white fabric, carrying a faint scent of lilies and decorated with delicate lace along the edges, appeared abruptly in the hand of Haru (in Kazuma's body).The air went completely dead silent at that moment. Even the evening breeze stopped blowing.Haru (in Kazuma's body) stared blankly at the item in his hand. For some reason, his brain subconsciously made a move that would make him want to kill himself later—he actually, as if possessed, brought the fabric to his nose, took a deep breath, and then showed an extremely intoxicated and punchable expression:"Haa... as expected of a Royal Palace guard knight, this scent of justice... it's so refreshing it makes my scalp tingle.""..."Claire slowly lowered her head, checking the inside of her skirt armor where she felt a sudden chill, then looked up at the man with Kazuma's face who was holding her private garment with the face of a total pervert."I... I..."Claire's body began to tremble violently. Her silver battle aura actually turned a bizarre dark red due to extreme shame.Her pupils lost focus, and her mouth let out low, hair-raising murmurs:"I'll kill you... I'll definitely kill you... whether it's Haruor Kazuma... you two demons... I'm going to cut you into pieces and feed you to Slimes! Aaaaaah!!!"Claire's dark red battle aura erupted like boiling lava. She didn't even bother to pick up her sword from the ground, letting out a shrill roar as she lunged at Haru (in Kazuma's body) like an infuriated lioness, claws and teeth bared."Give that back to me! No! I'm going to chop off your hand! I'll stomp that vulgar face of yours into the mud! Aaaaaah!!!"
Chapter 229: The Scent of Lilies"Waaaah! Help! This body can't run at all!"Haru (in Kazuma's body) tightly gripped that righteous trophy, desperately trying to move his legs.He was now deeply experiencing Kazuma's usual pain—the feeling of helplessness where the brain is screaming to accelerate, but the legs feel like they're struggling in a quagmire; it was simply despairing.Just as Claire's fist, wrapped in dark red battle aura, was about to land on the back of Haru's (Kazuma's body) head, a blinding flash of fire suddenly cut in from the side, accurately striking the lawn in front of Claire and exploding into a large cloud of dirt and grass clippings."Flame Jet! He-yah!"Kazuma, occupying Haru's body, elegantly withdrew his finger, a lingering spark still on the tip.Utilizing the precise mana control provided by Haru's body, he had forcibly turned a small lifestyle magic used for lighting fires into something with the power of a small bomb."Hey! Haru! What are you doing?! You're actually helping this pervert attack me?!"Claire was jolted by the shockwave of the explosion. She turned her head, face covered in dust, and glared at Haru in disbelief."Oh dear, Lady Claire, you're being too crude."Kazuma (in Haru's body) flashed a flippant smile that made one's blood pressure soar."That person is currently holding your honor in his hands. What if you break him and his hand slips, hanging that lovely piece of fabric on the palace flagpole? I'm doing this for the sake of your reputation."With that, Kazuma (in Haru's body) snapped his fingers again."Create Water!"Splash! A huge pillar of water fell from the sky. It didn't drench Haru, but instead accurately poured onto the dirt beneath Claire's feet.The originally flat lawn instantly turned into a slippery, muddy swamp. Claire, who was about to charge again, slipped and let out a cry, falling flat on her face in an utterly unrefined manner."Nice work!"Although Haru (in Kazuma's body) desperately wanted to beat up the bastard who was making faces with his own face, seeing Claire struggle in the mud forced him to admit that Kazuma's talent for being underhanded was truly off the charts."Of course! The mana control of this body is as smooth as silk. Not using it for pranks would be a total waste!"Kazuma (in Haru's body) laughed loudly as he nimbly jumped over a flower bed, casually using a [Wind Blade] to cut the torches of the guards behind Claire."Hey, you useless brat holding the panties! Stop dazing out! Although I'd love to see this body get cut, Her Highness Alice would be sad if it actually got scarred! Cooperate with me quickly, let's retreat!"Haru (in Kazuma's body) gritted his teeth. While panting heavily, he waved the white fabric in his hand as bait:"Lady Claire! If you want this piece of justice, look over here! [Sensory Interference]... Ah, wait, I don't have that skill! [Lurk]! [Lurk]!!"In a cloud of awkward smoke (which was actually just dust Haru kicked up with effort), Haru (in Kazuma's body) tried to use Kazuma's skill to vanish into the shadows.Kazuma (in Haru's body) took the hint and activated [Flame Jet] on the other side, exploding a huge firework in the air, successfully drawing the attention of all the arriving guards."Over there! Lord Haru is starting fires over there!""No, that pervert Kazuma is running toward the stables with Lady Claire's panties!"The scene fell into a state of extreme chaos."Quick, now's the chance!"Kazuma (in Haru's body) swept past Haru (in Kazuma's body) like a gust of wind, grabbing the back collar of that useless body that couldn't run and lifting him up entirely."Even though carrying myself feels disgusting, considering how intoxicated you were smelling that just now, I'll reluctantly give you a lift!""Shut up! That was this body's instinctive reaction! Not my will!"Haru (in Kazuma's body) was carried in mid-air like a cat, still clutching those panties. Under the cover of night, the two actually displayed a bizarre tacit understanding and quickly vanished at the edge of the palace grounds.Leaving behind only a wail from the mud pit loud enough to shatter the palace windows:"Give me back my panties!!!"The two sped along. Kazuma's (in Haru's body) far-beyond-normal agility attribute was utilized to its limit; even while carrying a grown man, he moved as easily as if strolling in his own garden.It wasn't until they ducked into a pitch-black, remote alleyway smelling of mysterious salted fish that Kazuma slammed on the brakes and tossed Haru (in Kazuma's body) onto the ground like trash."Whew! Refreshing! So refreshing! This feeling of playing those high-and-mighty Royal Knights like fiddles is even more satisfying than winning a bet!"Kazuma (in Haru's body) slapped his thigh excitedly. That face, which should have looked dignified and upright, now twisted into an extremely punchable curve in the darkness."Hey, other me, that deep breath you took earlier was a stroke of genius! I almost want to give you a perfect score! Quick, let me see that trophy. I haven't carefully studied the defense specifications of the Royal Guard yet..."Haru (in Kazuma's body) scrambled up from the ground, his originally neat hair now a mess like a bird's nest.Listening to Kazuma's unrepentant laughter and feeling the burning sensation in his lungs from this useless body, his eye twitched violently."Study your head! You scumbag, you've completely stomped my reputation into the toilet..."While cursing under his breath, Haru (in Kazuma's body) feigned exhaustion and stumbled, his right hand quietly reaching into his robe. His fingers touched that cold necklace emitting faint mana fluctuations."Oh? What's wrong? Can't even stand steady? It seems my body really needs some exercise... Eh? What are you touching?"Kazuma (in Haru's body) keenly sensed something was wrong and was about to jump back to create distance.But it was too late.Even in this useless body, the decisiveness belonging to a top-tier Adventurer had never vanished from Haru."Switch us back!!!"Haru (in Kazuma's body) exerted sudden force. Under Kazuma's terrified gaze, he slammed down on the gemstone at the center of the necklace that was swirling with strange colors.Vrrr—!A white light, even more intense than before, instantly filled the narrow alleyway.Haru only felt a violent pulling sensation deep in his soul, as if his entire being was stuffed into a high-speed spinning dehydrator.Three seconds later, the white light dissipated.Haru snapped his eyes open. The first thing that came into view were his own long, powerful, and calloused hands.He tentatively clenched his fist; the surging sense of power and the clear flow of mana instantly returned."Whew... Finally, I'm back."Haru let out a long breath. The sense of clarity brought by the return of his intelligence made him feel reborn."Aaaaah! My god-tier body! My high agility! My intelligence!!"Opposite him, Kazuma let out a tragic wail. He slumped onto the ground, his originally straight back instantly collapsing as that gloomy aura belonging to a loser shrouded him once more."Who else were you planning to seduce?!"Haru walked forward with a cold laugh, looking down at the scumbag rolling on the ground. He casually patted his cloak, which had been wrinkled by Kazuma."You should be glad I switched us back in time, otherwise you'd be experiencing a high-altitude view from the palace's guillotine tomorrow."Just then, Kazuma suddenly felt something soft and cool pinched in his hand.He looked down; those white lace panties with the scent of lilies were lying quietly in his palm.The air froze once again.