The weight of 50,000 gold pieces didn't feel like a legendary reward to Mordecai. To him, it felt like a Series A funding round that was barely enough to cover the overhead of a multi-planar fortress and a growing roster of interns.
As the Guild Master of [The Silver Dragon's Golden Dawn] handed over the cashier's check with trembling hands, Elara—still sporting a faint red mark on her cheek from Vera's professional "denial of access"—watched them leave with a mixture of terror and unbridled arousal.
"Kaitoyama-san," she whispered, her voice cracking. "Please come back soon. I have several... light fixtures... that need your rugged attention."
Mordecai didn't even turn back. He was too busy looking at a spreadsheet only he could see.
Both Pyroetta and Vera just gave a deadly glare to Elara, enough to say 'Say something more and you'll die'.
After that, Mordecai, Pyroetta, and Vera all walked towards their room in the [Sleeping Basilisk] Inn.
Once they were safely away from the prying eyes of the guild, Mordecai closed his eyes and opened the telepathic bridge to Fort Blackstone.
Pyroetta and Vera stepped into their room, as our beloved necromancer asked for some 'business privacy'.
'Ugo, report,' Mordecai commanded.
'Sire,' Ugo's voice echoed, crisp and clinical. 'The moat is now 99.4% algae-free. Sir Aric has requested a second toothbrush as his current one has reached its structural limit. Also, the "Furniture" (Ignis) is flickering. I believe he requires a mana infusion or a new bulb. The healer is constantly asking to see your face again, and Cassandra is teaching legal moves to Niel.'
'Focus, Ugo. I need a strategic diversion,' Mordecai thought, leaning against a stone wall while Vera stood guard with the stoic poise of a Secret Service agent in the other room. 'Our recent activities have attracted too much attention. I want you to install a decoy. Find the most stereotypical, edgy, over-the-top Dark Mage puppet we have in the Sword of Eternal Damnation. Set him up on the throne.'
'A "Front-Man," Sire?'
'Exactly. Give him a name like "Malphas the Soul-Render." Program him to repeat three phrases: "None shall pass," "Your souls are mine," and "Muahahaha." If anyone attacks, have the traps handle the defense, but let the puppet take the credit. I cannot have the Kingdom's auditors looking for a project manager when they expect a demon. Ah, and remember to add [Rusty Spoons] everywhere.'
'Consider it done, My Leader. And the new acquisition? Vera's territory?'
'Aviation Logistics is now a subsidiary of Ravenloft Holdings,' Mordecai noted. 'Vera will manage aerial reconnaissance and rapid document delivery. Also, Ugo... regarding Luketto.'
There was a brief pause. Luketto, the massive stone Golem, had not spoken at all for a while. Moreover, Mordecai telepathically saw that he was staring at a pebble and sighing so loudly it caused minor tremors in the masonry.
'The Golem is... experiencing an existential bottleneck,' Ugo reported.
'Schedule him for a Spectral Psychological Session,' Mordecai ordered. 'Use the "Ghost of HR Past." Tell Luketto that his sadness is negatively impacting the quarterly structural integrity reports. Remind him that as a Golem, he is a literal pillar of the company. If he doesn't find a "Work-Life Balance" soon, I'll be forced to reassign his consciousness to a much smaller, much more anxious toaster. If possible, search for a specialist sealed in the Sword of Eternal Damnation.'
'Understood, My Leader. I shall begin the therapy immediately.'
After the Discord call ended, Mordecai finally lay down on the bed, probably wanting to relax.
As he felt the softness of the mattress, a massive, crimson notification box manifested before his face, pulsing with the urgency of a high-priority server crash.
[SYSTEM NOTIFICATION: REGIONAL INFLUENCE CRITICAL!]
[DATA RECAP: THE "CLEANING" OF HANDAL AND THE "HIRING" OF SIR ARRIC HAS LEAKED TO THE CAPITAL.] [
HIGHER REALMS STATUS: HYPED. THE NARRATIVE IS DEMANDING REVENGE.]
[WARNING: MULTIPLE "DIVINE BLITZES" DETECTED. SEVERAL HERO-TIER PARTIES ARE CURRENTLY ORGANIZING CRUSADES TO "LIBERATE" FORT BLACKSTONE.]
Mordecai stared at the warning for a moment; instead of the expected grimace of a villain under siege, a slow, predatory smile spread across his face. He adjusted his electrician's cap, his violet eye glowing with a terrifying light.
"Excellent," Mordecai murmured. "Still more employees. Our recruitment drive is going better than expected."
In that moment, Vera and Pyroetta stepped into their master's room.
"I sense a danger, My lord," Pyroetta spoke.
"It seems like we're gonna have more guests," Mordecai said, with a bored tone of voice.
Vera tilted her head. "Boss? Should I prepare for aerial bombardment?"
"Not yet, Vera. Let them come. A fortress is only as good as its staff, and we have several vacancies in the Janitorial and Filing departments. Let the 'Heroes' provide the labor."
"So what are we gonna do now?" Vera asked.
"Relax. Take some time for yourself. I give you permission for a pause." He said.
Vera and Pyroetta's eyes widened and sparkled, and for an instant, their pupils became heart-shaped.
Mordecai felt the [Clichè Nausea]. Showing kindness to female individuals as Main Characters is the equivalent of "I love you."
In that moment, they both kneeled and thanked him. "Thank you, My Lord." They said in unison.
Mordecai sighed and adjusted his position on the bed. "Whatever. Let me rest now." He said.
Then, Pyroetta and Vera both walked into their room.
The next morning, the "Kaitoyama" party returned to the Guild. However, things were different.
Mordecai had officially registered Vera as a member of his party. But he couldn't have her walking around in a modern flight attendant uniform—it was too "anomalous" for the local meta.
"I look... heavy," Vera complained, clanking as she walked.
Mordecai had purchased her a set of "Generic Fantasy Plate Armor". It was the most unfanservicey armor in existence. It covered every inch of skin, featured a helmet that looked like a bucket, and had absolutely no "gravitational assets" visible. It was thick, grey, and utterly boring.
"It is high-quality steel with a 15% resistance to magic," Mordecai countered. "And more importantly, it makes you look like a background NPC. Invisibility is the ultimate efficiency, Vera."
"Baka! She looks like a trash can with legs!" Pyroetta shouted, though she was secretly relieved that the "Dragon Waifu" was no longer a visual threat.
Their destination was The Meander of the Damned, a dungeon notorious for its length, complexity, and sheer amount of "trash mobs" that took forever to clear. It was the perfect place for Mordecai to grind for the high-density mana materials he needed to feed his growing power.
They entered the Guild Hall to finalize the paperwork, but the air in the room was different. A suffocating, holy pressure had replaced the usual rowdy tavern atmosphere.
The adventurers were all kneeling. Even the Guild Master was bowing his head.
Standing in the center of the hall, bathed in a pillar of artificial sunlight, was Saint Lucy.
Lucy wasn't wearing her usual "Gentle Saint" expression. Her eyes were sharp, scanning the room with a predatory intensity that made the hair on the back of Mordecai's neck stand up. She looked less like a healer and more like an inquisitor.
"Wait," Pyroetta whispered, gripping her sword. "She feels... different. Her mana is fluctuating like a malfunctioning boiler."
Mordecai narrowed his eyes. 'She's hunting,' he realized, probably recalling his past. 'She's searching for something. Looking around until she's satisfied. That idiot.'
Lucy stepped forward, her white robes fluttering in a wind that didn't exist. Behind her, the "Higher Realms" chat was scrolling so fast it was a blur of gold and white.
"Children of the Light," Lucy began, her voice echoing with a resonance that felt like a needle in the brain. "The shadow of Aldmax has grown too thick. The Goddess has spoken to me. She warns of a 'Corruptor' walking among us—one who hides his rot behind the mask of the mundane."
She turned her gaze toward the crowd. When her eyes landed on Mordecai, she paused. A flicker of something—dark, thirsty, and entirely unholy—crossed her face before being masked by a divine smile.
"By the decree of the Heavens," Lucy announced, "I am here to perform a [Total Soul Purification Scan] on everyone present. No one leaves this hall until their essence has been audited for traces of the Forbidden One."
Mordecai stood his ground, his hand tightening on his tool belt.
[SYSTEM ALERT: UNIQUE SKILL DETECTED - 'DIVINE AUDIT'.]
[EFFECT: REVEALS THE TRUE STATS AND ALIGNMENT OF ANY TARGET BELOW LEVEL 250.]
Mordecai's current "Kaitoyama" level was 30. His "Mordecai" level was... hidden.
'System,' Mordecai thought, his mind racing. 'If she scans me, the Kaitoyama persona collapses. Can we redirect the scan?'
[SYSTEM REPLY: SHE ISN'T LOOKING FOR ALDMAX, BOSS. SHE'S LOOKING FOR YOU. HER 'DENSE PROTAGONIST' PROTECTION HAS FAILED. SHE WANTS THE ELECTRICIAN.]
Lucy began to walk toward him, her footsteps silent. The adventurers parted like the Red Sea. She stopped inches away from Mordecai, her scent—lilies and ozone—filling his senses.
"Kaitoyama-san," she whispered, her voice too low for the others to hear. She leaned in, her lips ghosting past his ear. "You look so... tired. Why don't you let me see what's really inside that sad, tormented heart of yours?"
Pyroetta and Vera were about to wipe her out of existence, but Mordecai told them not to do anything. (Telephatically)
She raised her hand, a golden light beginning to glow between her fingers.
Mordecai looked into her eyes and saw the truth. This wasn't a "Sacred Mission." This was a Hostile Takeover of the Soul.
"Miss Lucy," Mordecai said, his voice dropping into that deep, resonant baritone that sent a shiver down her spine. "I'm just an electrician. And I'm currently on the clock. I don't think you have the budget for this kind of consultation."
[HIGHER REALMS CHAT: EXPLODING]
NTR_Lover69: "YES! SHE FOUND HIM! DO THE SCAN! REVEAL HIS EDGELORD FORM! THE DRAMA IS PEAKING!"
WAIFU_HUNTER: "Look at her face! She's not a Saint anymore, she's a Yandere Inquisitor! 10/10!"
LUKAS_THE_GREAT: "Mordecai, use the 'Paperwork Avalanche' on her! Block the divine scan with a non-disclosure agreement!"