Chapter 200: The New Spider-Suit
The other officers hurriedly stuffed some cash into their pockets before rushing off to chase the escaping Deadpool.
"I'm no vigilante," Deadpool muttered, kissing a stack of cash he had snatched from the bag. He stuffed the money into his crotch, took a running leap, and—Crash!—dived straight through a glass window.
Shards of glass showered the pavement as he landed outside the bank and spotted a taxi parked in the alley. He dove through the open car window.
"Alright, my Indian friend, time to move," Deadpool said, patting the driver on the shoulder. The young man was still in the driver's seat, dancing along to the music in his headphones.
Seeing the driver was completely immersed in his own world, Deadpool reached forward and killed the music. "Drive!"
Bang!
A bullet shattered the rear window of the taxi and struck Deadpool square in the back of the head. Blood and brain matter splattered instantly as Deadpool slumped forward onto the back seat.
"AHHH! What did you do?!" The driver finally snapped to his senses. In a panic, he floored the ignition and slammed his foot on the gas.
Vroom! The car screeched away, swerving onto the main road.
"Target hit in the back of the head. Confirmed dead on the spot. The accomplice escaped," a police officer reported into his comms.
The voice on the other end crackled: "Ignore the small fry for now. Regroup at the perimeter immediately. We need every ounce of firepower we can get."
"On my way!" The officer turned and ran.
Inside the Taxi
"Gasp—cough!" Deadpool suddenly bolted upright in the back seat. He reached into the hole in his skull, pried out the bullet, and casually tossed it onto the floor mats.
"Now that's what I call a wake-up call," Deadpool said, patting his head to help the pooled blood drain out.
"You said you were just going to the bank to use the bathroom!" the driver cried out, sounding like a man who had lost all hope. He really should have known better than to listen to Wade.
"I was! I went in to use the facilities, stumbled upon a robbery in progress, and heroically took them down," Deadpool explained.
"Then why were the police shooting at you?!" The driver didn't believe a word of it. Why would the police ignore the robbers to hunt Wade down?
"I wasn't finished. I didn't like the way those robbers were handling things, so I robbed them," Deadpool admitted. He had simply seen that bulging bag of cash and felt an instant connection. Too bad he only managed to snag one stack.
"How is that any different from robbing the bank yourself?" The driver felt his future turning pitch black. His fiancée's betrayal was already enough to make him lose faith in life, and now Wade had dragged him into this. It wouldn't be long before he was a wanted man for being an accomplice.
"Maybe we should turn ourselves in," the driver suggested.
"Do you want to get executed?" Deadpool asked.
The driver shook his head. "Do accomplices get the death penalty?!"
"In court? Probably not. The problem is surviving long enough to get to court," Deadpool said, pointing to the closing hole in his head.
"Wade, if I die, I want you to scatter my ashes in the Ganges River," the driver said, looking as if he had already seen God.
"Why there?" Deadpool asked, puzzled.
The driver wiped a tear from his eye. "Because my fiancée is holding the wedding by the Ganges. I want to be able to haunt her when I'm gone."
"Don't worry. I'll make sure to feed your ashes to your eighty-year-old grandmother and stuff the rest into your fiancée's mouth," Deadpool replied.
"Wait, why?!"
"That way, you and your fiancée will truly be inseparable," Deadpool said, convinced he was honoring the driver's wishes perfectly.
Suddenly, the car radio crackled to life.
"We interrupt your regular programming for an emergency broadcast. A large group of terrorists is fleeing toward the West. Civilians in the area are advised to stay indoors, lock your doors, and keep weapons close at hand."
"We're going there," Deadpool said, his eyes practically turning into dollar signs. He could see mountains of cash swimming toward him. If a small squad had a bag that big, imagine what the main force had.
"Okay," the driver whispered, quietly steering the car toward the East. He wanted absolutely nothing to do with something that dangerous.
Elsewhere
"Change of plans. We're heading East," the scarred terrorist leader barked.
"Yes, sir!"
On the Mountain
It was time for a midday nap. Misty had spread a mat under a shaded tree and was currently dozing off with her eyes closed. Silas, Peter, and Ned were sitting nearby, playing cards.
"I swear, the more I look at them, the more pissed off I get," Ned grumbled, slamming a card down.
"Take it easy, Ned. Didn't you say you had plenty of other girls lined up?" Peter said, trying to de-escalate. He didn't want Ned to do something impulsive and pick a fight with Flash.
Ned played another card, glaring in Flash Thompson's direction. "I know, but it feels like Flash is getting off too easy." Ned's eyes suddenly darted around as a thought struck him. "Hey, Peter, do you have Flash's social media handle?"
"Yeah, why?" Peter asked. Despite their rivalry, Flash was so loud about his online presence that everyone in class knew his accounts.
"Sigh... to be honest, Ned," Silas interrupted with a sigh.
"What is it?" Ned asked, expecting words of comfort.
"You lost." Silas smiled and laid down his final card.
"..."
At the Base of the Mountain
A massive group of terrorists swarmed the area, disappearing into the woods with their automatic rifles.
"Use the armed helicopters for aerial reconnaissance! Ground teams, move into the forest and conduct a grid search. We must catch them!"
"Copy that!"
"Go! Go! Go!"
Counter-terrorism units immediately sprang into action, with local police following close behind.
In the Woods
Peter's ears twitched. He heard a chaotic noise growing louder in the distance.
"Peter!" Silas stood up and shouted.
Peter caught his brother's drift instantly. He turned to Ned. "Ned, you need to get out of here right now."
"Misty! Wake up! We have to go!" Silas said, shaking Misty.
Misty blinked her eyes open groarily. "What's happening...?"
There wasn't enough time. Silas pulled a rectangular yellow talisman from his pocket. "Sleep again."
The talisman dissolved into a faint yellow mist. Half of it drifted into Misty's nose, while the other half went into Ned's.
"I suddenly feel so slee—" Misty and Ned collapsed back onto the ground simultaneously.
"Silas, what did you do?" Peter asked in shock.
"A sleeping spell," Silas explained quickly. "Now, put them in the Shadow Kingdom."
Shadow Ninjas materialized instantly, carrying Misty and Ned into a secure isolation chamber within the Shadow Kingdom.
"Peter, your suit!" Silas tossed Peter a bundle of red and black fabric.
"Cool! A new suit?" Peter grabbed it and stepped into the Shadow Kingdom to change. Silas followed closely behind.
Just as the Parker brothers vanished into the shadows, the roar of rotors filled the air. Flash Thompson's group looked up in terror as an armed military helicopter hovered directly over their campsite.
"Dammit! There are still civilians in here!" the pilot shouted over the radio.
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