Ayanokoji looked at Subaru standing before him. The words the other party spoke were neither a bluff nor born of extreme overconfidence.
Instead, they were incredibly calm.
As if he were speaking of something so ordinary it couldn't be more mundane.
This was the result of Subaru's judgment.
For Subaru, it didn't matter how many times he failed along the way. As long as he won the final time, that was enough.
Or rather—
The time he won would become the final time.
Looking at Subaru before him, Ayanokoji seemed to be pondering something.
But soon, he seemed to make up his mind.
"Natsuki, even so, I still look forward to facing off against you someday in the future. At least for now, our interests are in conflict," Ayanokoji said slowly.
"Not only that, but I also sincerely hope you can make me taste defeat. That way, it would prove the White Room's errors, and it would—"
"I am not interested in anything about you. I don't want to repeat that sentence."
There was no change in expression on Subaru's face.
"However, there is a price to pay for losing."
"A price..."
"You have never lost before, so you cannot imagine what is lost after failure."
Subaru's words plunged Ayanokoji into silence. The knowledge he had learned in the White Room rendered him completely unable to understand the meaning within Subaru's words.
The conversation was over. Knowing there was no need to stay any longer, Ayanokoji soon left.
"Excuse me."
However, Ayanokoji did not notice that the look in Subaru's eyes as he watched his retreating back was becoming increasingly dark.
The next afternoon.
Sunlight spilled in through the library's huge floor-to-ceiling windows, spreading a patch of warm gold across the floor. The faint scent of paper mixed with wood furniture permeated the shelves, accompanied by the soft, hypnotic hum of the air conditioner. Occasionally, the sound of a page turning would ring out, only to quickly vanish into the silence.
There weren't many people in the library during summer vacation, only a few scattered upperclassmen quietly self-studying in the corners.
When Subaru pushed the door open and walked in, almost no one looked up at him.
Dressed in simple sportswear, his gaze stopped at a certain spot.
By the small round table near the window, Hiyori Shiina was bowing her head, flipping through a thick hardcover book.
She was wearing a pale blue one-piece dress today with gray stockings. Her silver-white hair glowed with a soft luster in the sunlight, and the eyes behind her thin-rimmed glasses were focused and quiet, as if the whole world had nothing to do with her.
Seeing Hiyori's silver hair, her silhouette couldn't help but overlap with the Emilia of the past.
But it was only for a split second.
Aside from the hair color, there was a vast difference between them.
Seeing Hiyori, Subaru walked over.
His footsteps sounded somewhat distinct in the quiet space. Hiyori looked up, and upon seeing it was him, a shallow smile immediately rippled across her face.
"Subaru-kun, you're here."
She closed her book and pointed to the chair opposite her.
"I thought you might be a little later."
Subaru sat down across from her.
Sunlight slanted in from the window, falling right onto his shoulder.
He leaned back against the chair, his gaze landing on Hiyori's quiet and gentle smiling face.
Then, he realized—
His shoulders, which had been tense all night, seemed to relax slightly.
"...Mn."
He responded. Although his tone still sounded flat, the usual sense of alienation seemed to have faded a little.
Hiyori seemed to sense something, but she didn't ask.
She simply pushed the hardcover book in front of her towards him, opened it to a certain page, pointed at a passage of text, and said softly:
"This book tells a story about the soul."
She paused, looking up at Subaru.
"I thought you might be interested in this, Subaru-kun."
Subaru lowered his head to look at the text.
Sunlight fell on the yellowing pages. The descriptions of the soul were strange and distant, yet held a bizarre sense of familiarity.
He didn't speak.
But his hand unconsciously reached out, his fingertips landing gently on the edge of the page.
Looking at the words in the book, he remembered Ram's eyes burning with crimson flames.
That was the purest color he had ever seen.
It was also the last color he had ever seen.
Everything after that had faded to gray.
Oh, no. It was a gray expanse to begin with.
Hiyori watched him quietly.
She didn't ask what happened last night, nor why he looked so exhausted, nor why the shadows in the depths of his eyes had grown a few shades deeper.
She just sat there, quietly keeping him company.
After a long time, Subaru looked up.
He looked at Hiyori's quiet face, devoid of any questioning or expectation, and suddenly felt—
That this world wasn't entirely unbearable.
"Subaru-kun."
Hiyori's voice sounded softly, interrupting the darkness surging up from the depths of his memory.
Subaru raised his eyes.
She was looking at him. Within those clear eyes was a quiet, almost weightless concern.
"What is it?"
Subaru's voice was softer than usual, though the habitual flatness remained.
Hiyori didn't answer immediately.
She lowered her gaze, seeming to think about how to speak.
"Subaru-kun,"
She finally spoke, her voice very light.
"You... have been very tired recently, haven't you?"
Subaru didn't answer.
He just looked at her, no fluctuation in his dark gray eyes.
Hiyori seemed to have anticipated this silence.
She didn't retreat, nor was she awkward. She simply continued in that soft and calm tone:
"I don't mean to ask you anything. It's just..."
She paused, seeming to search for the right word.
"It's just that I feel you look... more tired today than usual."
Not dark. Not heavy. Not those words that might sting.
She used the word "tired."
A gentle word, devoid of any aggression.
Subaru's eyelashes trembled slightly.
"Tired?"
He repeated the word, a trace of imperceptible self-mockery in his tone.
"Perhaps."
Subaru hadn't expected the Hiyori before him to actually notice.
Oh, no.
Perhaps precisely because she was Hiyori Shiina, she keenly perceived it.
Hiyori watched him quietly.
She didn't ask "why are you tired," didn't ask "what happened," and didn't try to use cheap concern to touch things she couldn't reach.
As if the person sitting in front of her was just an ordinary, somewhat weary person.
"Shiina,"
Subaru looked at the person before him and said slowly,
"After so many things have happened, are you not afraid of me?"
Hiyori blinked.
"Afraid?"
She thought for a moment, then gently shook her head.
"No."
"Why?"
"Because..."
She tilted her head slightly, as if thinking seriously.
"Although you look scary, Subaru-kun, you have never hurt me."
"You don't know if I will."
"Mn, I don't know."
She admitted frankly.
"But I feel that if you really wanted to hurt me, you would have done so already. You haven't, so..."
She paused, her eyes curving slightly, smiling like the afternoon sun outside the window.
"It's just that, because of the class, you had to do those things before, Subaru-kun. But I have no right to say anything, because after all, if you didn't do something, Ryuen-kun would likely have done some terrible things as well. Although I don't like it either, Ryuen-kun isn't someone who can be swayed by others."
Subaru didn't answer, simply watching her quietly.
"...It's summer vacation now. We don't need to consider the various struggles within the classes, so I can take the initiative to find you..."
Hiyori's voice gradually trailed off, as if checking if she had said too much.
She lowered her gaze, fingertips gently rubbing the edge of the page. The thick book about the soul lay quietly between them.
Sunlight slanted in from the window, dyeing her silver hair with a warm halo.
That halo made Subaru dazed for a moment—not because she resembled anyone, but because at this moment, she herself possessed a soft light that made people want to draw near.
"So,"
Hiyori looked up, her clear eyes gazing at him through her lenses, holding a cautious sincerity.
"If you are willing, Subaru-kun..."
She paused, seemingly weighing her next words.
"I can listen to you."
"Say what?"
Subaru's voice remained flat, but the habitual sense of alienation seemed to fade a few degrees more.
"Anything is fine."
Hiyori's eyes curved slightly.
"Words you want to say, Subaru-kun. Anything you want to say. If you don't want to say it, you don't have to."
She reached out and placed her hand gently on the book, her fingertips only a few centimeters away from Subaru's hand.
"I don't know what you have experienced, Subaru-kun, nor do I know what you are burdening. Perhaps I will never truly understand those things."
Her voice was very light, like the cloud shadows occasionally drifting past the window.
"But I can feel that you seem to be carrying a lot of things on your shoulders."
"However, if someone listens, it might be a little easier."
Subaru fell silent.
He looked at the quiet girl before him, looked into those clear eyes that held no demands, no fear, and no curiosity.
In those eyes, he couldn't see anything familiar—none of Ryuen's burning violence, none of Kushida's twisted hatred, none of Horikita's complex calculations, and none of Ayanokoji's hollow probing.
Only a pure, gentle acceptance.
Like a pool of still water.
Like the afternoon sun.
That was...
The color belonging to Hiyori Shiina herself.
Perhaps because he had sunk into a deeper darkness, the colors he saw now were more vivid?
Like that thing he once thought, a long, long time ago, that he could possess forever.
"...Does no fear of me exist in your heart?"
He asked, his voice lighter than before.
"You've asked that already, Subaru-kun."
Hiyori tilted her head slightly, a shallow smile playing at the corners of her mouth.
"My answer hasn't changed."
"You don't understand me."
"Mn."
She admitted frankly.
"I don't."
"You don't know what I've done."
"I don't know."
"You don't know—"
Subaru paused. Deep within his dark gray eyes, something extremely heavy slowly surged.
"You know nothing, yet you can still give such an answer?"
Subaru remembered that one day, long ago, Emilia had said similar words to him.
That was also when Emilia faded.
But Hiyori Shiina was different from Emilia.
From the very beginning, Emilia had opposed him as the Purge King.
While Hiyori Shiina.
Had accepted it from the start.
Hiyori listened quietly.
She simply nodded.
"Mn, I don't know any of it."
She admitted it so frankly, so frankly that Subaru didn't know how to continue for a moment.
"But,"
She continued, her voice soft but firm.
"I know the current Subaru-kun is sitting here, reading a book with me."
"I know that when you walked in just now, your shoulders were tense, and now, they've relaxed a little."
"I know that when you look at me, that... that very deep, very heavy thing in your eyes seems to have faded a tiny bit."
Her eyes curved slightly.
"These things, I know."
Subaru didn't speak.
The sunlight outside the window fell between the two, dyeing the air a pale gold. The occasional sound of turning pages came from the distance, and the low hum of the air conditioner was soft and hypnotic.
After a long time, Subaru spoke.
"...Why would you make such a judgment?"
Hiyori blinked.
"Because you are my only book friend, Subaru-kun, my only friend... no... the only important person. So I have always been observing you. As a detective, the most important thing is observation, and I've read many psychological crime novels."
"After knowing what kind of person I am, you will be disappointed."
"Disappointed?"
She thought about it, then gently shook her head.
"No."
"Why?"
"Because... because."
She lowered her gaze, seeming to carefully organize her language.
"Do you know, Subaru-kun? Sometimes people are disappointed in others because they have an imagination in their hearts of what the other person 'should be like.'"
"When the real person is different from that imagination, they get disappointed."
She looked up at him.
"But I don't have that kind of imagination for you."
Subaru's eyelashes trembled slightly.
"I haven't thought about what you 'should' be like."
Hiyori continued, her voice soft and honest.
"So, no matter what you are like, Subaru-kun, you won't disappoint me."
"I just..."
She paused, her eyes curving slightly.
"Just being here. With you. Reading the same book, basking in the same sun. That is good enough."
Subaru fell silent.
He looked at the silver-haired girl before him, looked into her clear eyes that held no demands.
Suddenly, he thought of a question.
"Hiyori, in your eyes, what color am I?"
"Color?"
Hiyori Shiina looked at Subaru very seriously.
"I believe it cannot be described by a single color at all."
____
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