After an awful lunchtime, Taehyeon thinks he can be excused for skiving off in the nurse's office. Minjun's excuse is a mystery.
"I can keep an eye on him whilst you're gone," Minjun says cheerily when the nurse dithers over whether or not she can leave the room. "I know where everything is in here anyway."
"I don't order equipment for you to waste with games of doctors and nurses."
"I'll only use something if it's an emergency," Minjun promises, shuffling slightly beside Taehyeon on the bed. Apparently that is enough for the nurse to decide he is responsible enough to leave in charge. She rushes from the room and Taehyeon does have to wonder what the fuss is about. She must have seen something interesting on her phone because she certainly wasn't paying any attention to any sick students whilst Minjun was struggling to read mock exam questions aloud.
"Nurse Kim went to school with my sister." Minjun allows his words to sit in the air for a moment as he kicks his legs out into the air in front of them. "She isn't going to tell on me or anything for hanging out here. It's cool, right?"
Taehyeon nods, though considering how this day has gone so far he wouldn't mind Minjun being made to leave him alone in peace.
"You said you've got your exams next week though. You can go back to your class if you want."
"It's okay, I can concentrate better here like this."
Obviously Taehyeon doesn't believe that. He doesn't bother trying to convince Minjun any further that he should go back to his classroom.
"When your friend was strangling you, it looked so real," Minjun says. "I thought you were really hurt. I'm sorry if you didn't want me to interfere. Well, you were hurt, but I'm glad it was just an accident in your game."
"Thanks for helping me," Taehyeon mutters. His throat is starting to hurt again and he supposes he should keep as quiet as possible.
"Any time," Minjun says, his warm smile lingering with an odd weight over Taehyeon. This expression doesn't come with the same elation as every time before. Forcing himself not to like Minjun isn't going to work, no matter what little fragments of truth fall into the right places.
Every new thing Taehyeon learns which should be unappealing will only make him feel more pathetic for the fact that his stupid feelings still remain. Ignorance was a blessing and gaining a space in Minjun's life is a curse. The fact that Taehyeon is gay is funny. It's a joke. Taehyeon supposes that to be Minjun's friend, he is meant to take the jokes as though they mean nothing and forgive everything whenever Minjun looks at him like this. Minjun's smile could break hearts. Taehyeon can feel his own heart breaking anyway.
The silence doesn't seem to give Minjun an inkling as to the realisation Taehyeon is uncovering. There are new pieces of truth here and Minjun tips his head back against the wall. He finally breaks his gaze and looks towards the window beside the nurse's desk. Some reprieve fills the space Minjun vacates when he leaps off the bed.
"Taehyeon, it's raining! Because you're injured, I should take you home," Minjun decides. He glances over his shoulder at Taehyeon, almost looking shy. "That's alright, isn't it? I won't be too much of a bother, I promise."
"I can't have friends over," Taehyeon lies hoarsely.
Minjun shakes his head quickly, still smiling. "No, I'll just come with you on the bus and then walk you home. I don't feel ready to meet your parents or anything like that."
Taehyeon very consciously doesn't say anything to that. He would only say something stupid if he loosened his tongue.
"I don't have an umbrella or anything. I'll have to think of a way to keep you nice and dry whilst we're travelling."
"There's no need to worry about things like that."
Minjun hums like he isn't really listening. "I don't know if you usually go home with your friends, but it would be nice if we could spend some time alone again. I really like when just the two of us are alone. It's easier to get to know each other that way."
"Okay," Taehyeon mutters. On Mondays he usually stays at school to do some self-study with Bada and the girls who had been seated next to them in their classroom last year. Bada already texted him earlier to check he'd be going home early.
This is weird. This feels like it is meant to mean something when Taehyeon is trying his hardest to get over Minjun. They're friends. Taehyeon can be friends with boys without being in love with them. He's friends with Bada and that has been going great. Taehyeon is capable of ending his crushes too. He successfully recovered from fancying Lee Dongmin last year, though Taehyeon must admit that it wasn't until actually speaking to him recently that he was completely cured of that nonsense.
"I'm not glad that you got hurt or anything," Minjun says almost carefully. "I'm not glad but then I can't stop thinking that I should be happy about the situation. Spending time with a group of friends is nice but it's nice to talk when it is just the two of us too. Speaking to you alone is exciting. There is so much I can get to know."
It is at this moment Taehyeon realises he must be dead. Minjeong killed him in front of everyone and this conversation is just his brain offering some meagre comfort before it's all over.
How terrible.
Minjun comes back to the bed, sitting on the edge and kicking his feet cheerfully.
"I heard from Siwoo that he had a falling out with Bada. It sounds like a tricky situation, especially when it is about something Siwoo is really sensitive about."
For a moment Taehyeon wonders whether he has fallen into a different dimension. None of the informational posters are emblazoned with mirrored text and the ceiling isn't oozing with a bloody, gooey substance. This isn't dreamlike comfort his brain would be sending in him in the last milliseconds of his life either. This must be real after all. It is just Minjun who is completely strange right now.
"What do you mean that you heard from Siwoo?"
"We've been talking," Minjun says cheerfully. "He has some really interesting perspectives on things so it is cool to hear what he thinks. He's been giving me advice too. I feel bad for him though. Apparently people are always assuming things about him because of the way he looks. You know, he's like… got a very delicate look. I was surprised to hear that Bada was one of those people but Siwoo was really upset by it."
"Upset? Do you know what Siwoo actually said to Bada?" Taehyeon asks. The windows are closed but there is a draught coming from somewhere which is chilling Taehyeon right through to the bone. He clenches his jaw against the odd chattering of his teeth and hopes that just this once he can stand up to someone. Better still, holding firm here might just be the antidote to that persistent irritation after being bitten by a relative of the love bug.
"Siwoo didn't tell me word for word but I understand most of what happened," Minjun allows.
"If you've only heard from Siwoo, you've only heard his side of things."
Taehyeon wouldn't call Siwoo's words colourful but they have left a very strong impression in his memory. Reading the texts in the aftermath of the date that never was was a painful experience. Taehyeon is only on the periphery of the situation. Bada is the one who likes that idiot. No matter how offended Siwoo was by the assumption that he liked boys, Taehyeon still can't see how any of the things he said were justified.
Like he was standing accused of the worst crime known to man, Siwoo made it abundantly clear how wrong Bada was and how sick he was of people coming to that conclusion. He even lumped Bada in with the sort of people who would try to take advantage of him or force him into things.
After reading over the messages, Taehyeon told Bada to delete them. Whether or not the messages still sit on Bada's phone, they're hard to forget.
"That's true that I've only heard Siwoo's side, but haven't you only heard Bada's side of things?"
"No. I saw it for myself. Bada was crying so hard that he couldn't even tell me what happened." Right after speaking the words Taehyeon regrets it. Rather than an invitation for sympathy, the world could take this information as a reason to ridicule Bada. He certainly isn't deserving of that. Taehyeon needs to speak fast to rectify this. "He's a good guy, you know. He wouldn't befriend someone because they're an easy target and he definitely wouldn't befriend someone on the off chance he can make them have sex with him. Bada is the best person I know and he didn't deserve anything that Siwoo said to him."
"Wow, he said all of that?" Minjun asks, as eloquent as ever. "That does sound mean, but assuming things about people isn't great either."
"That wasn't Bada's fault. You won't understand, but Bada can't help who he likes. Being able to admit who he likes to me is basically like climbing a mountain. It's still hard even though I'm his best friend. You'll never understand how much bravery it took Bada to confess to Siwoo. He didn't have to assume anything to be able to like somebody. Bada liked Siwoo just because he did. I know that you're on Siwoo's side but you're not standing with him against some stupid villainous version of Bada that Siwoo made up. You're standing with Siwoo against me because I'm the one who told Bada to go for it. I'm the one who was sure that Siwoo liked him back."
"Oh," Minjun says. He nods a few times but the few attempts he makes to look at Taehyeon end in failure.
Maybe Taehyeon is the bad guy. This is his fault for sure.
"Well, I'm obviously not the best judge of things like that," Taehyeon grumbles. "Don't hold things against Bada just because Siwoo says so. Don't hold things against Bada because he dared to believe that something impossible for people like us could be real."
Minjun doesn't say anything. He doesn't even pretend to look like he really understands. Taehyeon mostly feels like crying. The antidote is far more painful than the poison but some sweetness must eventually follow the sour.