The living room was too silent, too quiet. The television was off, and no one was arguing over the last pudding cup or the best gacha game.
On the low table, right in the center, they sat, lined up in a neat row. Four plastic sticks, each with two pink lines.
Makoto froze in the doorway. The musk melon slipped from his hand, hitting the floor with a thud. The sound of the melons rolling across the wooden floor was loud in the room's dead quiet. One bumped gently against the leg of the sofa.
Ayane appeared from behind the couch. The door to Yuna's room creaked open just an inch. Then Mika and Yuna walked out, followed by Mafuyu from the kitchen.
Makoto stared at the four positive tests, the bag of melons forgotten, as the first tiny sound of a giggle echoed from the hallway.
Mafuyu was the first to break the silence. She was clutching a pillow to her chest, her eyes wide and shimmering with tears. "…Welcome home, honey," she whispered, her voice rough and happy. Her free hand was resting on her still-flat stomach.
"So," Yuna said, her voice a low growl. "It seems we have a little situation, big bro."
"A happy little accident," Mika corrected, her voice a soft purr. "Times four."
Ayane, who was lounging on the arm of the sofa, trying and failing to look casual, let out a shaky laugh. "SURPRISE! It looks like your demon lord seed was… uh… super effective."
Mika just sat there, her hands folded neatly in her lap. "The tracking app was very accurate, and my timing was perfect."
"We're keeping them, all of them." Ayane declared, her voice firm. "And I've already picked out the names."
Makoto's heart stopped. "Umm… I'm sorry, it seems like my brain has shut down…" he mumbled, not knowing what to say. The pieces clicked into place with horrifying clarity:
Yuna, hunched over the toilet last week, her face pale. "I pulled an all-nighter for the new banner. It must have been the cheap ramen…"
Ayane complained that her favorite cosplay felt a little tight around the chest. "I guess all that Wagyu is finally catching up to me…"
Mika and Mafuyu, sharing a pot of lemon and ginger tea, wrinkled their noses at the smell of the fish he was cooking. "We just feel like something fresh today."
It wasn't a joke or a chaotic, horny fantasy. It was real.
"Are you just going to stand there and look like a stupid fish, you fat pig?!" Yuna's voice was shrill, an angry sound that barely masked the worry underneath. "Say something! And pick up the goddamn melons! We need the vitamins!"
"He's still in shock, Yuna-chan," Mika said, her voice a calm anchor in the middle of the storm. "It's a lot to process."
Ayane got up and started gathering the rolling melons, her movements a little too stiff. "Yeah, take your time, boss," her usual confident drawl wavering just a bit. "We, uh, we've already done the math. If we turn Mafuyu's spare bedroom into a nursery, it'll be a bit tight, but we can make it work."
It was Mafuyu who finally got up and walked over to Makoto. She gently took his hand, her own hand slightly trembling. Then she looked up at him, her eyes wide and shining with fear and love.
"It's okay to be scared," she whispered, placing his hand on her stomach, over the thin fabric of her apron. "But we're all in here. And we're not going anywhere." She gave him a small watery smile. "Congratulations… papa."
"It's… really, really not a joke, isn't it?" Makoto smiled dryly, half-confused, half-worried, and totally happy. "Come, let's talk." He gently pulled them closer until they all sat together on the couch. "Since when?"
The tension in the room broke just a little. Makoto's acceptance, however dazed and fragile, was the permission they needed to finally let their own masks of bravado and calm slip.
"It was Mika's idea," Ayane immediately ratted Mika out, plopping down onto the sofa and pulling him closer. "She said it would be more impactful than just telling you."
"Yeah, it was my idea," Mika said, not a hint of an apology in her voice as she arranged herself gracefully beside Makoto. "To give you something to remember, darling."
"I found out first," Yuna mumbled, curling up against his side, a rare moment of unguarded vulnerability. "I thought it was food poisoning. But then… it kept happening. So I talked to Mika."
"And then I saw the two of them who were whispering in the kitchen, so I followed," Ayane continued, leaning over the back of the couch.
"I just felt so tired all the time," Mafuyu whispered, snuggling in on his other side, her head resting on his shoulder. "And today, Ayane pulled me over to the living room while I was cleaning."
"And I," Mika concluded, her voice a soft final authority. "Had been tracking our cycles since that night. I knew the exact date of our likely conception. I simply waited for the appropriate time to confirm with them all."
They all fell silent. "So," Yuna said, her voice a muffled thing against Makoto's shirt. "Are you mad?" It was the most vulnerable question she had ever asked.
"No, I'm not mad," he said, nodding and looking back at Yuna. "I mean, it was shocking, but… I had imagined that it would come true one day, somehow, just not this soon." He gently pulled all of them into his lap so he could hug them all. "We're going to keep them, aren't we?"
Yuna stiffened in his lap and pulled her head back just enough to glare at him, her eyes red-rimmed and furious. "Of course, you idiot pig pro," she snarled, her voice a low growl.
She punctuated the sentence by weakly punching his chest. "We are keeping them! This is non-negotiable, you horny, perverted pig! You knocked us up, and you'll take the responsibility! End of story!"
And then, her angry facade crumbled completely when she buried her face back into his shirt, her shoulders shaking with relieved sobs.
"He's just asking, Yuna-chan," Ayane said, her own voice thick with unshed tears. She was clinging to his back, her face pressed against his shoulder. "Of course we're keeping them, big idiot boss."
A happy sob escaped her. "We're going to have our own little weeb army… our little family, you, me, Asuka, and her aunts…" The last word was a choked whisper.
"The decision was made the moment you creampied us, Muzan-sama," Mika said, resting her head against his arm. "This was always the only possible outcome." Her hand found his, her grip surprisingly strong.
And Mafuyu, the sweet, gentle Mafuyu, just looked up at him, her face a mess of happy, streaming tears. She couldn't even speak, just nodded frantically.
Then she took his hand, the one that was not being held by Mika, and pressed it firmly back against her own stomach. "You will take responsibility, won't you, Makoto-kun?" she murmured with a dark glint in her eyes.
"Of course, I will… I will take the responsibility. I… I had always wanted to make a family with you all, too, Yuna, Mika, Ayane, and Mafuyu-nee." Makoto's heartbeat quickened, and his head started running the numbers.
Raising them would be way more expensive than sponsoring Yuna's gacha addiction, Ayane's food, and Mika's gym membership, but that would be so worth it. "Are you all… fine being with me?"
The question hung in the air. And the answer was a chorus of overlapping, sincere responses.
"Of course I'm fine with it, you stupid fat pig!" Yuna snarled, her voice muffled against his chest, but there was no heat in it, just her instinctual tsundere affection. "Who else would I be with? You're mine. And now the babies are mine, too."
"Are you kidding me, buddy?" Ayane's voice was an incredulous laugh against his shoulder. "You're the only guy I know who wouldn't run screaming. You're the one who gets us. I hit the goddamn jackpot, Makoto. And now, we have a family."
"Where else would I go, darling?" Mika's voice was a soft purr. She looked up at him, her pink eyes shining with devotion. "You are my master, and now the father of my child. My place is with you, always." Her logic was simple, but unshakeable and unhinged.
And Mafuyu just looked up at him, her eyes shining with love. "You saved me, Makoto-kun," she whispered, placing a gentle kiss on his cheek. "You gave me a home and a family. And now, you've given me a baby." She smiled, a genuine smile. "I've never been happier, honey."