The guildhall finally began to breathe again.
After the whirlwind of chaos Kai's return had whipped across the floor—stretching from the near-exploded kitchen to the fresh crater left by Natsu's skull, all the way to a smoldering scorch mark Erza fiercely insisted was Gray's fault—Fairy Tail had settled into something resembling peace. Or, at least, the closest approximation of peace a collection of walking natural disasters could manage.
At the center of the room, Kai lounged across the top of a heavy oak table, legs stretched out carelessly. He leaned back on one arm, using the other to gesture with lazy, sweeping theatricality as he spun the tale of his encounter with Lullaby. A tight circle of wizards leaned in, hanging on every word as if gathering around a campfire.
"…so then," Kai said, tapping two fingers against the wood to mimic the heavy thud of a monster's stride, "the damn thing opens its maw. Wide. Think Mira trying to unhinge her jaw to inhale four pancakes at once—"
"I do not eat pancakes like that, Kai!" Mira called out from the bar, pausing mid-wipe to flash him a sweet, albeit entirely menacing, smile.
Kai merely winked, undeterred. "—and that's when I jammed the earplugs in, completely bypassed its tragic excuse for a solo, and broke its jaw. Clean. Like snapping a stale breadstick."
A collective wince ran through the younger members. Nab turned slightly pale, while Macao and Wakaba muttered darkly about sleep deprivation and nightmares.
Natsu, however, leaned so far forward his nose practically touched the table, eyes ablaze with raw envy. "So it really turned into a monster? A massive one? With claws? Did it have huge, flaming claws?"
"Eh. I've seen housecats with meaner dispositions," Kai shrugged, shifting his weight. "But it screamed loud enough to wake up the next five zip codes. Total drama queen."
Gray frowned, resting his elbows on the table as his gaze sharpened. "And you did all that while you were still busted up? Like, actually broken?"
Kai touched his own shoulder casually. "Few hairline fractures, a couple of deep cuts, stiff arm. Standard Tuesday."
The collective stare from Natsu, Gray, and Erza could have melted stone. Before any of them could voice the sheer absurdity of an injured man picking a fistfight with a living curse, Lucy raised a hand timidly from the back of the crowd.
"Um… so you defeated a literal demon… while half-dead?" Her voice trembled, a mix of awe and lingering terror. "You guys really are… the strongest team in Fairy Tail, aren't you?"
The words hung in the air.
It was as if someone had dumped a barrel of sub-zero water over the entire hall. The background chatter vanished instantly. The clinking of beer mugs froze.
Gray's jaw dropped. "The strongest team… in Fairy Tail?"
Lucy blinked, suddenly very aware of the crushing silence. "I mean… yeah? Isn't that what you, Erza, Natsu, and Kai are?"
The guildhall erupted.
Roars of laughter tore through the room. A few wizards literally fell out of their chairs, clutching their stomachs. Gray slammed his fist onto the table, shaking the wood. "I can accept Erza being our monster woman, sure. But flame brain in the top tier? Not in this lifetime!"
"What was that, you shirtless freezer-pop?!" Natsu roared, kicking his chair back as flames licked at his knuckles.
Kai reached over, flicking Lucy's forehead with just enough force to make her yelp. "Blondie—"
"It's Lucy!"
"—your theory would hold a lot more water if these two had a single shared brain cell between them."
A chorus of offended noises and raucous cheers bounced off the rafters.
"Oi, Lucy!" Gray snapped, completely ignoring the fact that his shirt had already vanished somewhere near the entrance. "Which idiot put that ridiculous idea in your head anyway?"
Lucy froze. Her eyes slid slowly, deliberately, toward the bar counter.
Mirajane stood there, holding a polished glass, offering Gray a blindingly sweet, innocent smile. The color drained from Gray's face in an instant.
"M-Mira, wait, I didn't mean—!"
Mira's lower lip trembled. Her eyes shimmered with sudden, tragic tears. "Oh, I see… so I'm just an idiot now…"
"Mira—no! No, no, no, don't cry! I wasn't calling you—stop! Someone help me out here!" Gray panicked, waving his hands wildly as Cana nearly choked on her beer, howling about Gray being a heartbreaker.
Amused by the spectacle, Kai swung his legs off the table, stepped behind the bar, and resting a hand on top of Mira's head, letting his tall frame loom protectively over her. "There, there, White. Ignore him. The demonic, exhibitionist stripper can't hurt you."
"I'M NOT A DEMON, MY NAME IS GRAY, AND STOP CALLING ME A STRIPPER!" Gray screamed from across the floor.
Mira sniffled, though the corners of her mouth were already twitching upward as Kai leaned down. "You're not an idiot," he murmured softly.
Her blue eyes brightened with genuine appreciation—
"—you just have a small brain."
The smile froze on her face. Cana spit a mouthful of liquor directly onto Macao's back. Within a second, Mira was furiously thumping her fists against Kai's chest, laughing and scolding him simultaneously. Kai just laughed, effortlessly catching her wrists and stepping backward out of range.
"I genuinely hate you!" Mira huffed, her cheeks puffing out in an uncharacteristic pout.
Kai raised two fingers in a lazy peace sign. "Old news, White. Tell me something I don't know."
The laughter eventually mellowed into a warm, comfortable hum as the exhaustion of the day finally began to weigh on the guild. Kai slipped back over to his table, only to find himself instantly cornered by a very stern Erza, a sulking Natsu, and a thoroughly irritated Gray.
Natsu slammed his fists down, practically vibrating with renewed energy. "Alright, no more distractions! You promised, Kai! Both of you promised we'd settle this after the mission! One-on-one! No running, no old man throwing giant fists—a real fight!"
Kai stared at him, entirely unmoved. "Salamander, we fought six hours ago. Did Gramps rattle your last remaining cognitive function?"
"That wasn't a real fight!" Natsu shouted, his scarf flying as he gestured wildly. "It has to be one-on-one! I'm gonna take both of you down this time!"
Kai let out a long, theatrical sigh. Under the table, he lightly extended his boot and tapped Erza's shin. "Hey. Red. Go. I choose you. Put the lizard to sleep."
Erza slammed both palms flat against the wood, her dark eyes blazing with sudden intensity. "Absolutely not. You're the one dodging accountability. I choose you!"
Kai's expression shifted. A slow, wicked smirk crept onto his lips—the exact kind of look that always made Erza's practical, disciplined heart do an uncomfortable piece of gymnastics.
"Oh? You choose me?" he drawled, tilting his head as his voice dropped an octave. "Proposing to me so openly in front of the whole guild? Bold move, Scarlet."
Erza froze. The stern, terrifying Titania vanished, replaced instantly by a girl whose face was rapidly matching the exact shade of her hair. "T-That is entirely out of context! You—! I—! That's not what I meant at all! You said it first!"
"So you admit we're engaged?" Kai leaned in, his golden eyes sparkling with dangerous mischief.
"I was not! You were!" Erza shouted, her voice cracking slightly under the strain of her mounting panic.
The immediate vicinity went dead silent. Every eye in the baseline area locked onto them. Erza's mouth opened and closed like a landed fish, her hand resting stiffly on the table.
Suddenly, Kai reached out and wrapped his fingers around her hand.
He leaned closer. Close enough that she could smell the faint trace of ozone and ink that always followed him. His voice fell to a low, velvety whisper. "Yeah. Actually, I was."
He held her hand firmly before she could bolt, his thumb tracing a slow, deliberate line over her knuckles. It was entirely intentional, devoid of his usual frantic energy.
"Erza Scarlet…" he murmured, his gaze steady and surprisingly warm, completely bypassing her defenses. "If you'll allow it… I'd quite like my name to rest beside yours one day."
He tilted his head slightly closer still. "And maybe," he whispered against the shell of her ear, "I could steal something precious before the night ends."
Erza's breath hitched, her throat tightening as she stared at him with wide, glassy eyes. "W-What…?"
Kai lifted her hand just a fraction of an inch. "Your lips."
The entire corner of the guild held its breath. Someone in the back actually squeaked. Faint steam began to visibly rise from Erza's collar, her free hand instinctively reaching blindly for the hilt of a sword that wasn't there just to keep her balance.
Kai leaned in—millimeters away—
Then, he stopped. He looked at her flustered, wide-eyed expression, and whispered, "Psych."
He threw himself back into his chair, watching her face cycle through three distinct colors of the rainbow before he completely lost it, bursting into a laugh so violent he literally tumbled off his seat and cracked his back against the floorboards.
"Ah, man—! My stomach—! The absolute look on your faces!" Kai howled, rolling onto his side. "Even you, Red! Were you seriously waiting for it?! The legendary Titania?!"
Silence. Cold, suffocating silence.
Then: BAM.
Erza's armored fist connected with his jaw with the force of a localized meteor strike, rattling the stained-glass windows of the guildhall.
A few minutes later, Kai was slumped in a chair beside Cana, a bloody nose stuffed thoroughly with crumpled tissues. Cana took a slow, highly amused sip of her barrel-sized mug.
"You really possess a terminal lack of survival instincts, don't you?" she observed.
Kai offered a muffled, painful grin through the tissue. "Where's the flavor in being safe?"
"Right. Well, you earned every bit of that flavor," Cana chuckled, leaning back. "Let this be a lesson not to play with a maiden's feelings."
Kai squinted at her through one swelling eye. "Are you speaking from experience, Miss Alcohol-Tolerance-Record?"
Before Cana could toss her drink in his face, Mira approached the table. Her smile was back—radiant, flawless, and utterly terrifying. She dropped a heavy linen ice pack onto the table with a dull thud that made the wood groan.
Kai raised an eyebrow. "Ow. Are you moonlighting as a blunt-force trauma specialist now?"
"Not at all," Mira replied, her voice dripping with honeyed malice. "I simply noticed an incredibly loud, irritating insect buzzing around this table and decided to swat it."
Kai wisely chose not to press his luck. He grabbed the ice pack, pressing it against his bruised face, before turning his gaze back to Erza, who was currently cross-legged on the opposite bench, glaring holes into his forehead.
"As I was trying to say before I was violently assaulted," Kai grunted, his voice nasal through the cotton, "I technically beat you twice today, Red. If Gramps hadn't used his giant fist as a legal intervention this morning, I would've taken the match."
Erza's jaw clenched. "You did not win. I had plenty of reserves left to break you."
"Right, right," Kai waved a dismissive hand. "Which is exactly why you needed backup from the twin disasters over here."
"HEY!" Natsu and Gray yelled in unison.
"I did not require their assistance!" Erza snapped, her armor clanking.
"Sure, let's go with that," Kai hummed lazily. "Either way, if you can't even handle Salamander's tantrum right now, you definitely aren't ready for a rematch with me. If he beats you, I'll just have to bail you out. As usual."
Erza stiffened, caught between outrage and lingering embarrassment. She whipped around to glare at Natsu, looking for any excuse to redirect her frustration toward the poor Dragon Slayer.
Before the impending explosion could level the room, a sudden change swept through the hall.
The ambient noise died down. A sharp, rhythmic sound cut through the lingering chatter.
Thud. Thud. Thud.
Footsteps.
Firm, synchronized, and heavy. They were approaching the main threshold from the streets outside. The air in the room grew instantly dense, heavy with an underlying magical weight that made the hairs on the back of Lucy's neck stand up.
Erza straightened instantly, the comedy dropping from her posture like discarded iron. Natsu stood up, his nose twitching as he caught a scent he clearly didn't like. Gray's jaw set into a hard, defensive line.
Kai slowly lifted his head, his golden eyes narrowing as the playful laziness drained from his face.
The heavy oak doors of the Fairy Tail guildhall swung inward with a slow, deliberate groan.
A pristine detachment of Rune Knights marched into the hall, armor gleaming under the lamplight, spears held perfectly vertical in tight formation. But it wasn't the guards that drew every eye in the room—it was the figure leading them.
A frog-person.
Dressed in the immaculate, high-collared white-and-gold dress uniform of an official Magic Council Envoy, she walked with a rigid, unyielding composure. Her large, glossy eyes scanned the room without a hint of warmth.
The loudest, most rebellious guild in Fiore went completely, utterly dark. Even Natsu kept his mouth shut, though his eyes burned.
Makarov let out a slow, tired sigh. He wiped his hands on his coat, hopped down from his stool at the bar, and walked toward the entrance. Despite his small stature, his presence was massive as he stopped before the detachment.
The envoy bowed from the waist, a precise, calculated gesture. "Master Makarov."
"Madam Envoy," Makarov replied, returning the gesture with a formal nod. "To what do we owe the pleasure of a Council visit so late?"
A ripple of anxious whispers cascaded through the back rows. The younger members looked physically ill. The Council rarely arrived in person unless things had gone catastrophically wrong.
The envoy straightened, her voice clear, resonant, and entirely devoid of emotion. "I am here on behalf of the Magic Council's judicial branch. This summons concerns the severe collateral damage at Eisenwald's former headquarters, the structural devastation across the Kunugi Plains, the near-total obliteration of Oshibana Station's central terminal—"
Several wizards prominently shrunk back into their cloaks at the list.
"—and the current status of the forbidden S-class artifact, Lullaby." Her large eyes locked onto Team Natsu. "The specific Fairy Tail wizards identified at these scenes are required to present themselves before the Council for formal interrogation and processing."
Lucy's hands began to shake. Gray's grip on the edge of the table turned white. Erza closed her eyes, her shoulders dropping under a familiar, exhausting weight of systemic bureaucracy.
"What?!" Natsu barked, stepping forward with smoke rising from his teeth. "We stopped a freaking demon! We didn't—!"
Kai held up a single, sharp finger without looking back at him. "Quiet, Salamander. Let the bureaucratic amphibian finish her script."
The envoy blinked, momentarily thrown off by the blunt description, but adjusted her collar and prepared to read the rest of the mandate. "You are required to immediately—"
Kai stood up. He casually dusted off his trousers, a relaxed, entirely unbothered smirk returning to his face as he looked at the tense, worried expressions of his teammates. "Relax. I'll handle this one."
The others stared at him in confusion.
"Consider it a tax for making you all worry about the demon earlier," Kai chuckled, tapping his temple. "Fair trade."
Before Erza or Gray could even reach out to stop him, the space where he stood simply emptied. There was no flash of light, no crack of displaced air. Just a sudden, clean absence.
"It seems you were looking for the guy in charge of the artifact," a voice murmured smoothly.
The frog envoy flinched violently, her spine snapping straight as Kai suddenly materialized directly beside her left shoulder, his hands tucked casually into his pockets, leaning down with a relaxed grin.
The surrounding Rune Knights froze, their gauntlets squeaking as their grips tightened on their spears. Not a single guard had tracked his movement. Even the envoy, trained to handle high-level mages, felt a cold sweat break out at the sheer ease of his speed.
Kai looked at the stiff guards, then back to the envoy. "Kairos Sunveil, at your service. Though please, just call me Kai. Kairos Sunveil sounds like a legal summons, and frankly, it gives me a headache."
Silence met his joke.
Kai sighed, shaking his head. "Tough crowd. Tough crowd."
The envoy cleared her throat, forcing her voice back into its professional register despite the slight tremor. "Are… are the other involved parties joining you, or will you be representing Fairy Tail alone? The record requires clarification."
Kai flashed a bright, reassuring smile. "No need to drag the kids out past their bedtime. It's just me. We can leave right now—wouldn't want to keep those honorable old gentlemen waiting. I'd be heartbroken if a few of them passed away from old age before we even arrive at the capital."
The Rune Knights exchanged bewildered, slightly panicked looks. They weren't sure if they were escorting a cooperative citizen or a monster who was actively treating them like an afternoon stroll.
The envoy nodded stiffly. "Very well. Follow us."
Kai turned back toward the guild, giving a lazy, two-finger salute as he strolled out the door ahead of the guard. "Bye-bye, children. Try not to demolish the roof while I'm out buying groceries."
The heavy doors clicked shut behind them.
The second the latch caught, the guildhall erupted into absolute fury.
"WHY THE HELL DID HE GO ALONE?!" Natsu roared, flames erupting from his shoulders as he slammed his foot into the floorboards. "We didn't do anything wrong! I'm going to the capital right now and breaking those old geezers in half!"
Erza caught him by the back of his waistcoat, yanking him backward with a sharp, iron grip that nearly cut off his air supply. "You will stay exactly where you are, Natsu!"
"But Erza—!"
"This is not a criminal arrest," Erza said, her voice tight, controlled, but laced with a deep, simmering frustration. "This is a political performance. The Council needs to assert its authority after a major crisis. They are choosing a figurehead to show 'consequences' so the public believes they are in control."
She let go of his coat, her eyes dropping to the floorboards where Kai had been standing moments prior. A heavy weight of guilt settled over her features. "But still… why did he take the burden alone? We were all there. We share the liability."
Lucy fidgeted with her celestial keys, her brow furrowed in genuine concern. "He… he said it was payback for lying to us. He's doing this because he thinks he owes us something."
Gray let out a rough groan, running a hand through his dark hair. "Dammit. I should've grabbed his collar and forced my way into that carriage. Someone needs to keep that idiot from insulting a high judge to their face."
"Exactly!" Natsu yelled, shaking his fist. "Imagine him opening his mouth in front of the Council! They'll throw him in a dark dungeon!"
"Or an execution block!" Lucy cried out, her imagination running wild.
"Or a volcano!" Happy added, flying overhead.
Cana snorted loudly, taking a long swig from her mug. "Honestly? Knowing Kai, he'd probably find a way to sunbathe in all three."
Despite the small cracks of humor, a dense, anxious energy still hung over the tables. The entire team turned their eyes toward the bar, where Makarov had quietly climbed back onto his stool, picking up his teacup with a remarkably steady hand.
He took a slow sip, letting the steam rise between his eyes. "Calm yourselves. Every single one of you."
"But Master—!" Erza started.
Makarov held up a single, calloused hand, cutting her off instantly. "Kai went because out of everyone in this room, he is the only one equipped to handle the political theater of the capital."
The group blinked, stunned.
"More than Erza?" Macao muttered from the side.
"More than the Master?" another whispered.
Makarov set his cup down with a soft click. "He has far more exposure to the Council's inner workings than any of you realize. His title as an Artifact Research Specialist isn't just a fancy label for a hunter—it's a direct royal appointment from the Kingdom of Fiore. It grants him an extensive layer of bureaucratic immunity and diplomatic protection that standard guild wizards simply do not possess."
Erza's eyes widened as the realization clicked into place. She had forgotten the weight of his official credentials beyond his rank as a mage.
Lucy stared, completely baffled. "He… he never mentioned that. He's protected?"
Makarov dryly chuckled, a small, proud smile touching his old lips. "That boy rarely shares anything of substance unless he's forced to. You're still new here, Lucy. You'll find there are many layers to your friends that don't show on the surface."
His expression softened, a mix of grandfatherly warmth and profound exasperation coloring his face. "That brat has enough political leverage to walk into the high chambers, insult their tailoring, and walk out without a single mark on his record. None of you have that luxury. If any of you went, the Council would have detained you for months just to save face."
The group fell into a quiet, reflective silence.
Lucy looked down at her hands, her voice small. "So… he did it entirely to protect us?"
Makarov picked his teacup back up, looking out the window into the dark Magnolia night.
"He might have done it to keep you safe," the old man murmured. "Or…"
Natsu leaned in, his eyes wide. "Or what, Gramps?"
Makarov sighed, taking a long, slow drink. "Or he simply wanted an excuse to skip out on cleaning the kitchen. With that boy… it is entirely impossible to tell."
Outside, miles away from the warm lights of the guildhall, the heavy carriage rattled along the stone highway toward the capital. Inside, Kai sat with his boots propped comfortably on the velvet cushions opposite him, a lazy smile on his face as he softly whistled a cheerful, irreverent tune into the dark.