The community had only one entrance. Inside were multiple old buildings with faded colour.
The community looked alive, with many people going about their day. All of the people inside were East Asians.
The air carried the scent of fried wontons, incense, and faint motor oil from nearby streets.
Street vendors hawked in English, Mandarin, Japanese, and a broken mix.
A group of elderly men and women played a board game.
A bunch of construction workers in hard hats and safety vests were drinking beer together.
Among the construction workers, there was one man. At first glance, he just looked like a normal construction worker, laughing and drinking with friends after a long day, but the Observe skill revealed something more.
Name: Liu Hong Bin
Codename: Coolie
Rank: E2
Title: First Rate Warrior
It looked like Hong Bin sensed my gaze on him, so he turned to look at me, but by that time, I had already looked away.
Colleen and I walked inside.
In another part of the community, a group of kids was laughing and playing.
"Sister Colleen."
"Colleen nee-chan."
"Colleen jie."
"Noona."
Some of the kids greeted Colleen with a smile. We stopped, and Colleen smiled at them.
"Be careful while playing," Colleen said with a smile to the kids. "Don't get hurt while playing."
The kids said yes in a chorus.
We continued walking after that.
I noticed a small barber shop.
"The Close Shave"
A guy, barely a few years older than me, was walking towards the shop, a pair of scissors in his hand. I only spotted the shop because of him. There was nothing remarkable about him. Even the status showed him as a normal person. But something about him caught my attention.
"Zhao Ming," Colleen called the guy, her face exasperated. "How many times do I have to tell you? Pull up your pants!"
Yep, that was the reason I even noticed that guy. His pants sagged low with no underwear in sight. Half of his ass was visible to the world in high definition.
Zhao Ming stopped and looked back. His face expressionless. I had never seen such a perfect poker face.
"It's called fashion," Zhao Ming said with a flat voice, still maintaining his expressionless face. "An old woman like you won't understand it."
"What did you just say, you little—"
Zhao Ming had already turned away. He ignored her completely and walked back to his shop nonchalantly. Proudly showing off his butt crack to the world like a badge of honour.
I laughed out loud seeing that. Colleen glared at me in anger. I only gave her a cheeky smile. As if knowing that glaring at me was useless, she turned back to Zhao Ming and glared at him as he walked away.
Colleen huffed beside me in anger, but in the end, as if used to Zhao Ming's antics, she calmed down quickly.
"Let's go," Colleen said and started walking again. A few shops were lined up. The barber's shop was one of the first ones.
We passed by a few shops. The next was a clothing store.
"Grand Clothing Store"
"Men's and Women's Western Clothing" and "Tang-style Traditional Clothing" were written on either side of the shop name on the plaque, in a smaller font.
As I looked at the clothing store, I remembered something and looked at the shopkeeper inside.
Name: Cai Jin
Codename: Tailor
Rank: E2
Title: First Rate Warrior
Cai Jin noticed my gaze and looked at me. He gave me a big innocent smile, and I also smiled in return. Then his gaze turned to Colleen in front of me, and he came out of the shop.
"Miss Colleen," Cai Jin called cheerfully. Colleen stopped and looked at him with a smile.
"Your dress is ready," Cai Jin said, still maintaining the innocent smile. "You can pick it up anytime. I hope you will like it. I put extra care into the stitching to make it perfect."
"Thank you, Master Cai," Colleen said. "I will pick it up later."
"And I will definitely like it," Colleen continued. "I believe in your excellent craftsmanship. If you have made it, it must be excellent."
"Oh, you~" Cai Jin blushed and swatted his hand in embarrassment.
Then he looked at me again.
"And who is he?" Cai Jin asked in a teasing voice. "Your boyfriend?"
"What?" Colleen looked stunned, then quickly said, "No. He is my student."
"No need to be shy, girl," Cai Jin chuckled and said playfully. He looked at me. "You have found a good one," he said, caressing my biceps gently.
I felt goosebumps when he said that with that face. A shiver ran down my spine.
An Expert Martial Artist is physically molesting me. Should I resist?
I felt I was in the most dangerous situation of my life. Just this time, my life wasn't in danger, but my ass was. That was hundreds of times more terrible.
"Stop teasing him, Master Cai," Colleen laughed and shook her head.
"I was joking," Cai Jin said with a smile and pulled back his hand. However, his smile didn't look that innocent anymore.
I took that opportunity to move a step away from him sneakily. Mirth appeared in Colleen's eyes as she saw me doing that. I rolled my eyes and ignored her.
Finally, Cai Jin's gaze fell on my other arm.
"Oh, my," Cai Jin gasped. "Dear, how did this happen?" His eyes were filled with worry.
"A thug poisoned him," Colleen said, leaving out the details. She thought he was just a tailor, so she didn't think there was any need to scare him.
The moment Colleen said that, Cai Jin's eyes sharpened for a moment, then returned to worry. The martial artist sleeping deep inside stirred briefly but didn't wake up. Colleen didn't notice.
But that only showed how well these martial artists had hidden themselves, even from a Martial Master like Colleen.
"Then, you?" Cai Jin said, looking at Colleen inquisitively.
Colleen nodded and said, "Yes, I am taking him to Granny Mei."
Cai Jin looked relieved hearing that. He hurried, "Then don't delay." Colleen nodded.
"Get well soon, dear," Cai Jin said. He continued with a wink, "And someday come to my shop. I will definitely give you a big discount."
I subconsciously clenched my anus.
But outwardly, I didn't show any difference.
"Thank you, Master Cai," I said with a smile. "Maybe, someday I will."
Internally, I sighed in relief that I saved my anal virginity.
We left Cai Jin and started walking again.
The shop right next to the clothing store was a small eatery. "Noodles and Congee" was written on the plaque.
The air thickened with the steam of broth, garlic, and faint soy.
A few rickety tables, steam rising from bowls, a chalkboard menu in messy characters.
The shopkeeper inside was diligently cooking in an apron.
Name: Zhou Lin
Codename: Donut
Rank: E2
Title: First Rate Warrior
And with that, I'd spotted the last hidden master in the alley.
Then my gaze fell on the only man eating at the table, dressed in pajamas. He drank the last bit of soup directly from the bowl. After putting down the bowl, he opened a bottle of liquor, took a big swig, gargled it, and then swallowed it.
Name: Yang Guo
Codename: Landlord
Rank: D1
Titles:
Martial Master
Fated Lover of Xiao Long Nu
After looking at the level of the three hidden martial artists, I had a suspicion that if the landlord and landlady existed, they would be even more ridiculous. And looking at the details in front of me, I was right.
Despite both of them being masters, Yang Guo was stronger than Colleen. It might be that Colleen had only recently become a master, so her level was only that much, but Yang Guo, who should have been a master for a long time, was certainly much better.
"Donut," Yang Guo belched, rising with a lunchbox in hand. "Bill."
"Yes," Zhou Lin said with a good-natured smile.
He came, pulled out some wrapped snacks from a nearby basket.
"How much?" Yang Guo asked, putting his hand in his shirt pocket.
"No, no," Zhou Lin said with a smile, gently stopping Yang Guo's hand. "It's on the house." He passed the snacks to him.
Yang Guo took the snacks without hesitation. "Donut," he said. "I like you." As he said that, he took a few more snacks from the basket.
"No, it's nothing," Zhou Lin just laughed, a little embarrassed. He didn't look offended by Yang Guo taking the snacks without asking. He just laughed a little more.
"I will talk to the wife about lowering your rent," Yang Guo said as he stepped out of the shop.
"Thank you," Zhou Lin laughed and bowed his head like someone seeing off his senior official.
From the beginning to the end, he maintained his easy-going smile and didn't look resentful or offended.
As Yang Guo left the eatery, his gaze landed on us—or rather, squarely on Colleen. I might as well have been invisible.
"Ah! Our Alley's own Jade Swan returns!" Yang Guo wheezed with a cheerful croak. "Your radiance makes the laundry on the lines look dull by comparison, Wing Shifu. Truly, truly."
Colleen gave him a polite but tired look. She looked as if she was used to and tired of his flattery.
"Landlord," Colleen nodded. "I have already paid this month's rent."
"Who speaks of such vulgar things like money when beauty graces us?" Yang Guo waved his hand dismissively. He looked at Colleen and shook his head with faux-sadness. "Teaching those lumbering brats their horse stances… it coarsens your aura. A flower should not do the work of an ox."
Is he using pick-up lines from the Ming Dynasty? Someone drag him into the 21st century.
Colleen instead straightened, and a hint of professional pride flashed in her eyes. "My students are progressing well. Their stances are solid."
But Yang Guo wasn't listening—his gaze had drifted to her curves, now more prominent as she straightened. He thought he was being sneaky, but even I could tell—not to mention Colleen.
Yang Guo's eyes lingered a beat too long, like a moth hypnotized by a particularly curvy flame. He cleared his throat dramatically, as if summoning wisdom from the ancients. "Ah, solid stances, you say? But Wing Shifu, your own stance... It's a masterpiece! The way you hold yourself—poised, unyielding, like a willow in the wind. If only I could learn such grace. Perhaps a private lesson? For an old man's creaky joints?"
Colleen's eyebrow twitched, the universal sign of 'not this again.' She crossed her arms, which only seemed to amplify the situation, much to Yang Guo's poorly concealed delight.
And, okay, mine too.
"Landlord, my lessons are for the dojo, not... private viewings. And your joints seem plenty agile considering you practically skipped over from Donut's shop."
I stifled a snort. The guy was about as subtle as a fireworks display in a library.
Yang Guo clutched his chest in mock offense, his wheezy laugh echoing around. "Cruel beauty! You wound me deeper than any sword. But fine, fine—keep your secrets. Just know, if those brats ever tire you, my humble abode has a balcony with a view. Tea? Poetry? No vulgar money talk, I promise."
I feel that at any time, I might receive a system notification that I have leveled up my Cringe Resistance.
"I'll pass, Landlord," Colleen replied flatly.
Yang Guo's face crumpled in real-time defeat.
Just as Colleen moved to sidestep him, a shout echoed from behind.
"Landlady!"
We looked back, and it was Zhao Ming, the barber, screaming at the top of his lungs.
"Landlady!"
A window snapped open above. A woman scowled down: curlers twisting her hair, a cigarette clamped in her lips, a perpetual scowl on her face.
Name: Xiao Long Nu
Codename: Landlady
Rank: D1
Titles:
Martial Master
Fated Lover of Yang Guo
Chainsmoker
And with that, the final piece of the puzzle was here.
Moreover, just how many cigarettes had she smoked that she actually got that title?
"What happened to the Wi-Fi?" Zhao Ming asked, spreading his arms exaggeratedly. "I was watching the latest episode of my favourite K-drama and the internet stopped suddenly."
With an expressionless face, Xiao Long Nu closed the window. Then came the voice of a rapid pair of footsteps. Merely a second or two later, she opened the door one floor below and stepped out. She gave one look at the tenants who started gathering and looking at her, likely with the same complaint. She climbed down the steps menacingly. Her speed was fast, but definitely not as fast as she apparently was while climbing down a single set of stairs inside her home.
Dressed in a pink tracksuit, she walked menacingly towards the tenants, who had begun to form a small group.
"Wi-Fi ain't free," Xiao Long Nu berated Zhao Ming. "And you talk a lot for someone who doesn't pay his rent on time."
Undeterred, Zhao Ming said in a matter-of-fact voice, "But I was in the middle of my favourite show."
"You think that's my problem," Xiao Long Nu snorted. She turned around, looked at the tenants, and announced in a shrill voice, "From now on, no Wi-Fi on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays. And limited access on Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Saturdays."
A collective groan escaped from the tenants.
"Complain again, and I'll cut it entirely."
Silence.
"You fools just love complaining," Xiao Long Nu snorted. "Assholes!"
She started walking towards the shops. Zhou Lin, who had come out of his eatery, greeted her with a smile.
"Good evening, Landlady," Zhou Lin said respectfully, bowing very low, maintaining his smile.
"Just pay your rent, or I will burn your shop down," Xiao Long Nu shouted.
"Yes, yes," Zhou Lin chuckled, unfazed.
Xiao Long Nu looked and saw Cai Jin standing in a feminine pose and giggling.
"What's so funny?" she snapped. "Rent's no laughing matter, sissy."
With a dramatic gasp, Cai Jin spun on his heel and ran to the shop, crying like a little girl, arms windmilling wildly.
Liu Hong Bin lumbered by, six heavy sacks balanced effortlessly on his shoulders. Those sacks looked so heavy that a normal person might struggle with just two. But he walked steadily with little to no inconvenience.
"Serves you right, you Coolie," she said as Liu Hong Bin passed by her. But he didn't even bother acknowledging her existence and left without a word. "Hmph, overdue for a month and not even a greeting."
"You will remain a coolie for life," she shouted in a shrill voice.
Meanwhile, Zhao Ming just stood, looking at her with his perfect blank stare. It might be that his gaze pissed her off, so she walked back to him and slapped his head, and he fell on his ass. "Here's your Wi-Fi."
"Oi," Xiao Long Nu shouted after seeing her husband. "What's taking you so long with the congee?"
Yang Guo showed her the lunch box and said, "I stopped to help an old lady cross the street."
"Then what are you still doing here?" Xiao Long Nu asked, then turned to look at Colleen.
"What are you doing here?" Xiao Long Nu repeated the question to Colleen. "Shouldn't you be at that dump right now?"
Colleen's jaw tightened hearing that. "That is my dojo you are talking about," she said in a low voice.
"If it isn't a dump," Xiao Long Nu said with a condescending voice. "Then how come you don't pay your rent on time?"
"I paid you rent on time for this month," Colleen said with gritted teeth.
"Just this month," Xiao Long Nu scoffed. "Before, every time you were late in paying your rent. Whenever I ask, you only have similar excuses: 'I will pay as soon as my students pay the fee', or 'The students are late this time for paying the fee', or 'There weren't enough students this month'." She said in a whiny voice, mocking Colleen.
"Not everyone is hungry for money like you," Colleen said with disgust. "You old hag."
"What did you say?" Xiao Long Nu asked in anger, taking a step forward. "Didn't anyone teach you to respect your elders?"
Yang Guo grabbed her arm hurriedly. "Relax, wife, relax." She struggled briefly, then snorted and backed off.
Her gaze then fell on me.
Yep, I am here too.
"Who is he?" Xiao Long Nu asked. "Your boyfriend? Isn't he too young for you?"
I desperately held back laughing out loud, listening to that.
"He's not my boyfriend," Colleen said. Then she immediately took a double-take, "Wait, what do you mean he's too young for me?"
"What you heard is what I meant?" Xiao Long Nu said with an arrogant smirk. "You are approaching thirty and don't even have a boyfriend. Now you are suddenly so desperate that you are hunting for boys a decade younger than you."
Colleen was red in anger. Her hand twitched towards her wrapped katana. She looked like she would erupt anytime.
Xiao Long Nu looked like she was having some kind of sick satisfaction looking at Colleen's expression. She said the final line that detonated the bomb. She puffed on her cigarette, then, with a condescending smirk, she said, "Old cow eating tender grass."
At this, Yang Guo desperately intervened to stop Colleen. "Relax, Wing shifu, relax." He glanced between them with a tired sigh, like he'd mediated this feud a hundred times. "Let's all be civil here."
Just like the previous time, for a split second, I saw a silhouette behind Colleen, a silhouette of a samurai. This time, one appeared behind Xiao Long Nu, too. It was the silhouette of a lion. I frowned when I saw that phenomenon for the second time. But I didn't dwell on it for now, when there were more important things to focus on.
Both women huffed, turning away from each other without meeting eyes.
"Whatever," Xiao Long Nu said dismissively. "I don't care who you bring here. But you'd better pay extra for guests in your apartment."
"What?" Colleen exclaimed, incredulous. "Why pay more when I already rent the place?"
"Why?" Xiao Long Nu repeated with a shrill voice. "My place, my rules. I rented it for you alone—extra bodies mean extra cash."
Colleen was about to retort, but I stepped in. I had listened enough and knew who the boss of the place was.
"Landlady, my apologies for dropping by unannounced," I said respectfully with a short bow. I slung my bag off, pretending to rummage inside while pulling the item from the Inventory.
"Landlady, please accept this meager token as my apology," I respectfully presented her with an expensive-looking box of tea leaves with both hands.
I had found it when I killed a small-time crime lord in the other world. While taking everything expensive, I had also grabbed a few boxes of premium tea leaves.
Colleen looked at me with her jaw dropped, her expression looked as if asking, "Who is this imposter? What has he done to my rude and arrogant student?"
"You are a good kid," Xiao Long Nu said with a pleased smile. She turned to Colleen and said with a playful smirk, "You might be a disrespectful brat, but your boyfriend at least has good manners. You can have him for tonight for free, but you will need to pay for him starting tomorrow."
Wait! Why does that sound wrong?
"He is not my boyfriend," Colleen said with gritted teeth. "He is my student."
Xiao Long Nu ignored her and instead gave me a sweet smile, then took the box from my hands. It was then she noticed my arm.
"Who did this to you, boy?" Xiao Long Nu asked with a serious voice. Even Yang Guo also noticed it and looked serious for a moment. But both their seriousness was fleeting, and they returned to their original expressions.
Colleen sighed and gave the same version she gave to Cai Jin. "That's why I brought him here to have Granny Mei take a look at him."
A sliver of respect appeared in the couple's eyes at the name.
"You idiot girl," Xiao Long Nu berated. "Why didn't you say that before?"
"You didn't give me the chance," Colleen snapped.
"Whatever," Xiao Long Nu said dismissively. "Take him to her."
She eyed me warmly. "Boy, ditch this old woman. I'll introduce you to my daughter—she's just a few years older than you. Better age match than your dojo instructor here."
I kept a respectful smile, neither accepting nor refusing.
"You still haven't explained," Xiao Long Nu scowled at her husband. "What were you doing here?"
Colleen's face twisted evilly, payback burning in her eyes from earlier flirtations—and this spat.
"He invited me to his balcony for tea and poetry," Colleen said sweetly.
Color drained from Yang Guo's face. "Wing shifu, don't spout nonsense without proof!" He jabbed a finger at Colleen.
"She's crazy," he whined to Xiao Long Nu, looking wronged.
Xiao Long Nu stared silently, then turned and stalked toward their apartment without a word.
"Wife, wait for me!" Yang Guo yelped, scrambling after her.
"Is the drama part of the rent?" I whispered.
Colleen gave me a dirty look but didn't bother answering.
"I didn't know you lived here," I asked the question I had in my mind since I came here. "I thought you lived in the dojo."
"You are not alone in thinking that," Colleen sighed. "I do have a personal room at the dojo, but I only use it when I decide to stay over there if I practice late into the night. But my actual residence is here."
I nodded, and we walked towards our destination.
The fiasco was finally over, and we were finally at our destination.
"Deep Alley Medicine Shop"
So many interactions happened in such a short while that the distance of a few tens of meters felt like kilometers long.
"Granny Mei is an excellent doctor," Colleen introduced. "She was a licensed traditional medicine practitioner in China, but that license is useless in this country." She continued in a helpless voice, "I just don't know why she doesn't apply for one here. Without it, she can only open a small shop here."
"She is the most respected person here. Even that old hag gives her two points of respect and considers Granny Mei as her elder."
"Everyone has different aspirations," I said, and we stepped inside. Judging by the respect Colleen and the weird couple showed her, she should be incredibly good at whatever she did that the couple allowed her to open her shop here without proper documents.
We had just taken another step when we heard a loud crashing noise behind us. We looked out, and the noise came from the owners' apartment.
Suddenly, the window opened, and Yang Guo was pushed out. He was dangling from the window. His face was covered in bruises, and his hair was disheveled. He cried in pain when Xiao Long Nu grabbed a fistful of his hair and yanked him back. Then she hit him with a chokeslam. She continued hitting him, and he grunted in pain at each hit.
After hitting him a few times, she pushed him out of the window, two floors above ground. He hit the balcony of the first floor on his way down, then finally hit face-first to the ground with a thud.
The tenants were surprised, then moved curiously towards him. They stopped as a potted plant fell squarely on his head and broke. He didn't even twitch at that.
Yang Guo lay motionless on the ground. Zhao Ming, who was beside him, picked up a branch from the ground and started poking Yang Guo.
Yang Guo didn't respond after the first poke, so Zhao Ming poked again, and again the third time. "Go away!" Yang Guo grunted.
Zhao Ming dropped the branch and left. The other tenants also left, leaving the landlord on the ground as if it were just another Tuesday.
Colleen and I gave each other a look, then turned back and walked into the shop.
It was finally time to meet Granny Mei.
The shop was filled with the scent of herbs.
At the small reception, Colleen called, "Granny Mei."
A minute later, a rickety woman stepped out from the inner room. She walked with a cane. Her hair was white with age, but still looked lustrous. Her face showed some wrinkles. She wore a loose black jacket and trousers.
"Granny Mei," Colleen greeted with a genuine smile and hugged the old woman.
I kept smiling, but internally I was cursing Colleen for bringing me into a serpent den.
Name: Tang Mei
Codename: Silent Moon, Granny Mei
Rank: D2
Titles:
Martial Grandmaster
Medicine Grandmaster
Poison Grandmaster
Hidden Weapons Grandmaster
Shadowless Needle
Can I run away?
"How are you, dear?" Granny Mei asked with a caring smile.
"I am good, Granny."
"Oh, you have a friend over," Granny Mei said, looking at me. Her eyes were on my arm. "And looks like he needs help."
"Yes, Granny," Colleen said and pulled me closer by hand.
All the cells in my body were protesting to run away, but with an embarrassed smile, I walked towards her.
"Show me, dear," Granny Mei said with a warm smile.
"Thank you for helping me on such short notice," I said, and showed her my hand.
I had no idea what she was doing. I could only tell roughly that she checked my pulse, then she started poking at random spots, which I assumed were acupoints.
"You have a strong vitality, dear," Granny Mei observed. "It has drastically reduced the spreading of the poison in your body."
"I will be back," she said and walked back inside.
Soon, she was back with a small box. She opened it, and I saw it had multiple needles inside it.
My Danger Sense briefly flickered as I looked at those needles. Out of curiosity, I used the Observe skill.
Ghost Gate Thirteen Needles
Rank: D2
Fuck!
She pierced a needle in my arm at a specific spot. I thought it would hurt, but I didn't feel a thing. Quickly, she pierced the rest of the needles in my arm. Then, I felt a warm current in my arm, which I assumed was her chi.
As she pulled out the needles one by one, a nasty purplish-green liquid oozed out of the holes. The colour slowly returned to my arm. The faint pain and dizziness also lessened. She wiped the poison and did the whole process once more.
Finally, my arm looked as good as new.
I looked at my arm incredulously. Then she swiftly healed my ribs, too.
"Thank you, Granny Mei," I said respectfully.
"No problem, dear."
"Granny, how much is the fee?" I asked with an embarrassed face.
"Oh, don't worry about it, dear," Granny Mei said with a smile. "You are Colleen's friend, so you're like family. After all, it's not every day that Colleen brings a boy back home."
"Granny," Colleen whined in a shy voice.
Now, it was my turn to look at Colleen, slack-jawed.
Who is this imposter? What has she done to my stoic instructor?
Soon, I left the shop. Since Granny Mei refused to take money, she agreed to take another of my boxes of tea leaves after much insistence. After all, I didn't drink tea, so those were useless to me—no harm in using them to gain some goodwill.
Colleen was still inside talking with Granny, but I was done. My quota for the Pig Sty Alley for today was done.
I had had enough for today with this place filled with hidden dragons and crouching tigers.