The Joker and the Demon run along the hallway.
"Shouldn't one of us guard the kid?" the Joker asks.
"He will be fine," Demon says.
Yeah... they are talking about an Uchiha who has 99th percentile chakra control with absurd medical knowledge.
The last time the village has seen a talent like that was like 20 years ago.
He will live.
"He is the son of Gokibori Uchiha after all," Joker says with a high-pitched voice.
They laugh.
The room morphs and bends as they run along.
It forms spikes and teeth that bite.
But the duo dodges them effortlessly.
At least it widens and a thick lump of concrete separates the two ANBU.
Both nod at each other as they silently decide to play along for now.
The Joker looks around the empty and dark hall he is standing in.
A single arrow cuts through the air.
He blocks it with the flat of a sickle-like blade. Dodges a few by simply moving his head.
"Ee he he he he he!" the Joker laughs.
The attack stops.
"What's so funny?" a very angry voice asks from the darkness.
The Joker keeps laughing.
The sound of him hitting his stomach from laughter vibrates across the hallway.
Something here is absurd.
Something here is funny.
"What's so fuckin' funny!" the enemy snaps at last.
"You..." the Joker points at the dark room.
Pointing exactly at the place he was hiding.
"Oh... you found me," a colored ninja slowly climbs down from the ceiling leaving a trail of web behind.
"Tell me, where is the Uchiha, and I won't have to gut you like the lady from before," he threatens.
"He he he he he!!!! Really?" the Joker laughs as if he is trying his best not to.
"Stop freakin' laughing! You freak!" the sound ninja spits as he draws a very bony-looking bow.
"Why! Laughter is the best medicine!" Joker keeps chuckling.
The sound ninja winces at the annoying chuckle.
It's vibrating around the room, like he can feel every beat of it.
To his surprise, the Joker-masked ANBU looks rather focused.
Not shaking like an old man anymore.
But... the laugh persists.
"Genjutsu?" he thought to himself as he clicks his tongue.
This guy is not like the ones wearing the turtleneck jackets called jounins.
This one... is a weirdo.
The sound ninja lets go of his draw, and the arrow flies true.
"Medicine is for the sick," he says.
Joker stops laughing as if he is amused.
"Say, child... what is your name?" the Joker asks as he dodges the arrow by simply moving his neck.
Another arrow is shot out of nowhere, but the Joker catches it with little effort.
The sound ninja has... extra hands sticking out of his back holding multiple crossbows.
Making an assumption of how many hands there are would be foolish, considering the Joker has fought many weirder opponents in his prime.
"Kidomaru," he answers.
"Oh... so... you are one of Orochimaru's freaks?" Joker tilts his head.
Kidomaru pops a vein at the remark.
"Oh don't be upset. We have some of his weird experiments in our ranks too," Joker waves his hand dismissively.
Kidomaru furrows his eyebrows.
Is this guy stalling?
There is no way the Uchiha is escaping, as long as one of them coughs up the location the leader will take care of the rest.
The Joker guy suddenly becomes straight.
"Wait... so you guys aren't the ones morphing the tunnel?" he asks.
Kidomaru goes into stance.
"Maybe?" he says mysteriously.
"A 3rd party?" Joker makes a guess.
Kidomaru laughs this time.
"When isn't there?" he asks.
"Then..." Joker pulls out a katana that seemingly slips out of his palm like it was folded like paper.
"We should get this over with a bit earlier."
Kidomaru couldn't agree more.
But he knows... he isn't getting out of this one alive.
Not with this one.
Doesn't matter, as long as the leader gets Master Orochimaru back, nothing matters.
######
Sasuke POV:
I take a chakra pill and an adrenaline shot. Gotta run fast if I wanna shake off the Sound Four.
"Here we go again, old man," I say as I strap Hiruzen to my back.
My back starts to sweat.
My palms are sweaty, the dinner I ate threatens to come out from sheer anxiety.
I jump away from my spot like a mad monkey running on coals out of sheer instinct.
Sticking to the ceiling, I look down.
The whole floor is riddled with what seems to be...
Bones.
Human bones to be specific.
Very sharp and shiny bones.
A spot in the bones splits apart and a very pale-looking man emerges.
I don't wait for an introduction and make a run for it.
There is no need to hang around people who can pop out of human bones.
That's... Kimimaro... isn't he?
Oh my fuckin' god! I'm dead!
He is gonna strap my body on an unsealing altar to fish Orochimaru's soul out of me.
Then he will kill me.
I can hear the ground popping beneath me.
There are more bones about to come out and impale me.
I turn my Sharingan on for a split second again.
The whole hallway, as long as it stretches, has small patches of chakra all over.
Taking in the rough ideas of where to dodge, I unseal a grappling hook and shoot it at the distance.
The grappler sparks with the sheer weight and speed as spikes pop out behind me.
Engulfing the whole room in bones.
The grappler gives out at last.
I stumble along the spikes, trying to keep my balance.
The white-bone man, Kimimaro, catches up to me.
I unseal my axe to block the bone sword that popped out of his palm.
I can feel it rattle under the weight and my balance gives away from the force.
As I fall backwards, his face comes into view.
A very...
Very...
Very white man.
He makes hospital floors look gray.
This... this is not a sick-ass Kimimaro.
That's a Kimimaro prime. A direct descendant of the goddess Kaguya.
A demigod in flesh.
The alpha Kimimaro.
And he is about to kill me.
As his second plunge threatens to enter through my belly and exit through my head, my whole body instinctively sends all my chakra to my eyes and activates the Sharingan.
It felt as if the pain would kill me if Kimimaro didn't.
But it allowed me to dodge and weave away from his further swings.
I twist and turn my body using the bone spikes as leverage.
Following his blades is impossible. But his loose kimono, fluttering along his movement, allowed me to not only dodge his swings flawlessly... but also follow up with a few punches of my own.
His whole body is covered in some weird bone armour.
Unsealing a few more of my axes, I dual-wield them while closing distance, since we passed the spiked area and are now on even solid ground.
Hence I made a discovery: he can pop the bones but he can't retract them as quickly.
Kimimaro discarded the bone blades completely and proceeded to fight me in hand-to-hand combat.
With my added weight on my back... it's harder to move.
But I am familiar with the style of taijutsu he is using.
Somewhere between Gentle Fist and Tiger Fist.
I've seen Gai-sensei use it.
Guess it's an unrefined version of Gentle Fist?
I block his kick with my kick,
Dodge his hooks and weave below his strikes.
As long as he can't force me to create distance, I will be fine.
And it looks like he also took it as a challenge.
I feint an upward kick.
Kimimaro, clearly attempting to grab a slower kick, I grab his wrist first.
It's a move I practised for years.
Moving a single part of my body faster than the human brain can send a signal.
It makes a "pop!!" sound as I grab his hand.
Kimimaro, for the first time... widens his eyes.
Before I can lock his arms in my thighs and break it like a twig, something pulls me backwards.
Separating me from Kimimaro.
And oh! am I glad it did.
Kimimaro's armour under his shirt exploded into bits of bones like a grenade.
Like some kind of failsafe.
I look to my shoulder.
Hiruzen is up.
The bastard used my strings to pull me back.
With the one good hand he has left... the old man saved me.
"Let's make a break for it," I decide.
"No," Hiruzen orders with a heavy voice.
He grabs my head and turns it towards Kimimaro who is about to shoot out his finger at me.
"Stand your ground and fight," my heart ablaze at his firm command.
"You have the God of Shinobi on your shoulders."