Due to real life circumstances I'd completely lost all hopes/motivation to write for this any longer, piling onto the fact that my contracts were getting rejected, which stung because initially I'd started this book(if you could even call it that), in hopes of getting my foot in the door and get money, but somewhere along the lines I started to actually appreciate what I was beginning to come up with albeit extreme themes and such. Pair all of this with the fact that 2024 was probably one of the worst year of my life retrospectively, I just gave it all up.
Since 2026 has been nice(atleast relatively), I can shift some of my mental bandwidth for this. I had a whole lot of experiences as well that'll help me aid writing more chapters as well. I'm not asking for pity(it might look that way) but I'll finish this book with my original methodology of writing and stuff.
Again, I sincerely apologise. I'm a bit amazed I'm still here, because I was convinced I wouldn't be, because of all that shit that happened to me, but somehow I made it through. This book was also a way of expressing my inner thoughts and was like a relief of all of my pent up emotions, as well. In real life, I'm a very introverted, nerdy, shy guy, you'd never think I'd write something as troubling or dark like my work. I've never told many people irl about this, the ones that did, did kind of sway me in the right direction: to finish it and give myself closure, and to every reader who painstakingly read through each and every chapter, be it cringe, violent, abusive. I'm just glad you read it. That's all.