It's been three weeks since their deaths. The funeral didn't look like what it supposed to be.
Just me, Gloria and her mom.
And few drunken friends my dad had
What a joke..!
Did I move past any of this... certainly not
Struggling with nightmare every time. I see myself burning in the most devastating way. By the fourth week, I was gone
Mama Grey told me I could stay back home
There's no home anymore, it's Gloria's house.
They didn't let me stay alone like I intended. Food,clothes, company didn't sound right to me anymore. It all felt wrong,like I wasn't deserving of it all
And school...it got worse!
The bullies found out and made that a topic
"I thought you'll be wearing your mother's clothes today.!"
"I forgot... it's all gone with the flames!"..
It sounds so funny to them and yet I couldn't laugh at it
"You should change school" Mrs Smith would say
But I have to see this through, fix my record and not mess things up.
Moving from one table to the other, I had become a pro setting the orders straight.
They call me tough girl, fixing the table, earning more tips got me more bullies at work too
"Leave that girl alone or I can make you!" Mama Grey would yell every time too
Now, they can only glare and do nothing.
Like staring at a fleshy frog you can't eat.
"Hey Vee...!"
I did try my best to avoid Gloria. She's always acting all jiggling than before. Like a sister! That word is so heavy I might throw up.
I made it a must to cover the little groceries... I don't wanna be a leach
"Dad's here!"....She smiled
She now have the habit of calling her Dad my dad or saying it in a way that sounds like I had a dad which I don't
"Good evening Mr Smith!"...A humble greetings to my benefactor.
"Oh evening to you too Nesa...come join us!" He as smiley as Gloria. And nice to but I don't feel comfortable around them
Mrs Smith didn't let me refuse like I used to. She wobbled me to the chair and set my meal.
I could only eat in silence
They released a sigh. I knew I was giving them trouble and that's why I wanted to stay away
"Well Nesa... Gloria here suggest we go for adoption!"...Mr Smith said in between his meals.
I didn't quite understand it. I thought they had children already. Three in fact...why want more?
But the way Gloria looked at me I feel cringe
"I don't think it has nothing to do with me Mr Smith. You can adopt any child you want!".....
Not satisfied with my answer,they sigh again
Can you guys stop doing that?
"He means,we want to adopt you!" Mrs Smith somewhat interpreted
"No!"... I wasn't opting for consideration
"Why?" Gloria sounded sad...
Give me one good reason I'm imagining a novel of a cruel hellish life of an adopted child by her so called sweet sister and adoptive parents
"Sure she has her reason!"...Mr Smith added
"Well... I don't want to give up my parents name! And suddenly calling someone else Dad and Mom sounds like I'm betraying them. And also... I'll only cause you too much trouble!"
In one breathe it's a big no!
What were they thinking? I'll dance and be happy? Heck oblivion no!
"Well that sounds reasonable. We didn't think much about how you'll feel. But just keep in mind we're here for you and you're not a bother!".... Mrs Smith hands on mine did made me feel relieved. Happy they've dropped the subject
But someone didn't.
Back in my room
I counted the money saved up. Mama Grey did well to give me one thousand every week thinking I'll need to buy something at least to survive. And with all these tips it's going high.
Study time.
I did promise my mom I'll be a fashion designer. I'll study real hard and get that transfer to Eden vocational college!
A soft knock...
It's her!
"Come in!"
Her face was what I expected it to be...
"Hey Vee!"...
She'll always use that opening sentence when ever she's trying to go emotional
"Yes!"...
"Why did you say no over there? We could be sisters!" Her voice was just so dry and it hurts to see her that way
I'm not being selfish right?
"Gloria... there are lines we can't cross. Once we cross that line we can't uncross it.
I'm indebted to you and your family for taking me in and that's all there is to it. Taking that adoption offer makes me look like a self centered leach and you know I hate that!"
Being friends is enough...any further strings will be hard to take back.
That was all on that topic. If she doesn't understand then I'm sorry I can't explain more than I already have.
Finally when I thought there was peace....
"Is she the girl?".... Lancelot... Gloria's second brother. Looking like a brute made a off comment
"Yes Lans... don't make things difficult for her!"... Gloria warned with a glare leaving with a strict gaze
With those sudden calm gaze I feel this guy is going to turn things around
Well it didn't take long before he stated to show...
"Aren't you supposed to be cleaning or something?"
I didn't quite picture the role he thought I fit in
"So you're a freeloader now!"...
Now that's harsh. Thank goodness I rejected the adoption offer. I wouldn't want to be his sister.
"Enough Lans!"....now that's a family voice Bruce Smith the eldest
"Good evening brother!"...now Lans looked like a rabbit and he indeed ran like a rabbit.
"Nesa... I'm so sorry about that brat!"...he said adjusting his glasses
"It's fine uncle Bruce!"...opps...!
*Now you're making me look and feel old. Bruce is just fine!" He smiled and I'll dare say he looked good
"I wouldn't. Brother Bruce is fine!"..he simply nod
"I'm sorry about your parents as well. How are you coping?"... it's been awhile since someone asked me about them
Aside from the burning nightmare "I'm alright!"
Adjusting his glasses again,he took the off... looking straight into my eyes
"Don't bottle things in. If you need someone to talk to I'll be here!"
Saying that,he turned around and walked away.
Bruce didn't look like someone who would care because I'm his sister's friend. Perhaps he just say it out loud or he pitied me
Well who wouldn't?