Chapter 30: Epilogue
The Next Day
The sky was grey. The clouds trailing sluggishly by looked more like smoke. Twisted trees surrounded Sakura; their branches barren save for a black rot across every last jagged part. Not a single leaf that wasn't black. The grass was long, uneven and as unhealthy as the trees and the soil beneath it. The little girl couldn't help but shiver with each step her bare feet took across the ground. She came close to stumbling once or twice because of some rough rocks stuck in the dirt, but she managed to keep her balance without touching the trees.
Every now and then, a cold breeze would sweep through the forest and send a chill through Sakura; her pajamas offered little protection. …Where am I? she wondered as she carefully stepped through the trees. Is this a dream?She jumped a little at a howl that came from the wind slipping through the branches above. O-Or a nightmare…?She looked slightly panicked about, but there weren't any animals. No savage bears or wolves, but no birds or squirrels running about, either. Not even a cricket.
She walked a bit further, hoping to find something alive in this… this broken place… and then there was a patch of land even darker than what she had behind her. Sakura came to a complete stop before she could cross the border, her heart hammering in her chest. The fields were pitch black, and the twisted trees seemed to have something… skittering about inside. They loomed over a path full of dark mist and… whispers the girl couldn't make out.
And she frankly had little interest in discerning what was being whispered or who (or what) was doing the whispering, so she turned on her heel and scampered away. Not that the grey lifeless woods she was returning to had more joy to offer, but it was still better than… that. Still, once she had put a decent amount of distance behind her, Sakura couldn't help but sniffle. What kind of dream was this supposed to be? Just when she'd gotten back home with Mother and Rin… Was it because Father was gone? …Or because she didn't say goodbye to Uncle Kariya? W-why am I dreaming this? Sakura cried silently. Did I do something… bad?
Then, despite the gloomy woods around her… For a second, Sakura thought she heard humming.
She dried her eyes, her eyes perking up. There it was again. Tilting her head, she began to walk in the direction towards the deep, gentle tune. The closer she got, the clearer the humming became. She found herself walking a little faster; there was just something about the sound. She came to a brief stop and looked around to pinpoint it, hair whirling about-
Sakura paused and fingered a few strands, eyeing them confused. Huh. Why were they white?
She prodded and flicked through more of her hair, but each and every strand was white as fresh snow. Weird… It's kind of pretty, though. Sakura almost looked around for a mirror or a stream to see her reflection when she remembered where she was. Her spirit began to sink again… Then the humming returned, and the girl quickly picked up the trail again.
Sakura didn't know how long she searched, minutes or hours or maybe even a whole day, but when she found the source of that soothing melody, she somehow knew her search had been worth it. There in a small clearing was a man in white.
Or maybe it would've been better to call him a man of white. From the long robes almost touching the dead ground to the long stick he was leaning on for support, a pointy shape with pretty arches at the top and a clear crystal inside, to the long hair spilling out from the back of his head… It was so bright, so clean no matter where he stepped.
He was walking about in the clearing, sometimes probing a spot with his staff. His head, back still turned to Sakura, tilted up towards the trees and the bleak sky above, and his humming became all the clearer to hear. Soon, she could make out words, too. "The road goes ever on and on…" Sakura could've spent all day (or night) simply listening to it.
She was so enchanted by the melody she didn't realize she'd begun to walk to the man until a dead branch snapped underneath her foot. The man's humming ceased as he turned around, the sudden motion startling Sakura into darting behind a tree. She winced at the rotten bark crumbling beneath her fingers but tried to keep quiet.
Then a voice called out. "Hello…?" Sakura almost flinched but stopped. "Is someone there?" It was a deep, smooth voice with a kind of rumble to it, she'd heard one or two Englishmen talk like that, guests of Father and Mother. "Would you care to come out? I mean you no harm." There was something… calming in the words. Something that made Sakura relax; scared though she was, she felt she could trust the voice. Besides, it would be nice if she didn't have to walk around this place all alone.
So, she slowly stepped away from her hiding place and out into the open. This allowed her to see the man clearly. "Ah, there you are." And he saw her, too. "Forgive me, I didn't mean to frighten you."
"I-it's okay," Sakura quickly assured him, "I wasn't… really… scared. Just startled." He had a kind face full of wrinkles, a neatly trimmed beard as white as the hair that framed his head and the gentle smile he gave her, and eyes of a bright blue. Sakura returned their gaze and smiled herself; there was something so inviting about them, like a pool of warm water or a clear sky, not the murky soup above them. No, staring at this sky eased her of her worries.
And the longer she stared into the man's eyes, the surer she was that she'd seen them before.
She couldn't remember for the life of her, though, and eventually she remembered her mother's lessons about staring. With an embarrassed blush, the girl stammered, "S-sorry."
If the man's humming had been music to Sakura's ears, the chuckle that rippled from him now was a symphony. Deep and melodious, it swept away her doubts. "No need if that," he assured her through his laughter, "If you seek no apology from me, dear, then I shouldn't demand one from you." He took a step towards her, and when she didn't flinch away, he added another step. "It's a pleasure to meet you, dreary though this meeting place is."
"Mmhm." Sakura nodded a little, stepping a little closer herself to the man. "My name's Sakura M-" She paused, then with a relieved smile, she amended her introduction. "Sakura Tohsaka, it's nice to meet you, too."
"Sakura, eh?" His own smile grew both bigger and kinder as he offered her a hand. "What a beautiful name, and quite fitting, I see."
She felt her cheeks warming at the words. She couldn't stop smiling, either; the hand she took was warm, and the grip gentle as they shook. "Th-thank you. And who are you, mister?"
His brow furrowed, and he frowned in thought. "Who I am…" He stroked his beard while humming to himself, but his eyes remained clouded. "…Dear me. I seem to have forgotten."
"You… don't remember your name?" Sakura's mood sank a little as he shook his head. The more the white man stood there thinking, the more he looked so… lost. A sight like that didn't feel right to the girl; she was growing surer with each second that passed that she had met this nice man somewhere before. His kind face, his relaxing presence… it was so familiar. But she couldn't recall either.
Still, she wanted to help him. "Well, maybe I can help you," Sakura offered, drawing the man's attention back to her. "Do you remember anything, like how you got… here?"
Her face fell a little as she gestured to their surroundings, but the man appeared neutral. "I cannot say that for certain, either. What I do remember is waking up near a fallen tree," he waved his staff towards an opening in the trees opposite from where Sakura had come, "a few paces in that direction. I have been exploring these woods for some time, then I met you." He knelt down so their eyes were almost at equal level. "Would you happen to know where this is?"
"Um, I'm not really sure, but…" Sakura looked away from him. She fidgeted a bit, unsure if she should be completely open with this stranger or how he'd react to her idea. Then again, the white man hadn't laid a finger on her, yet. He was being very patient with her, in fact, even now as he knelt here waiting. So, with a deep breath, she said, "I think we're in my dream. This forest, right now…" She huffed a little. "It sounds crazy, I know, but…"
But the man simply hummed in thought. "Well, if this is your dream, then I suppose I must ask you how you're feeling, Sakura."
The girl looked up at him in shock, prompting him to place his free hand on her shoulder and smile. "I do remember a little of myself. Fragments, really… but from them, I consider your suggestion not so 'crazy' as you may think." His smile faded, though, as he glanced up at the dead trees. "More importantly, dreams are often a reflection of our current state. The deeper parts of our minds conveying a message to us." He faced her again. "So, pardon me for asking, Sakura, but if this forest is truly a product of your mind, then… are you alright?"
"I…" Sakura thought long and hard about the white man's words. It made sense, though; if she really had dreamed this place up, then her mind was probably trying to tell her something. But… did she really want to know what that something was? The forest with no life, that dark part of it… She must've made that too. Or did she…? No… no, that wasn't-
A gentle pressure pulled the scared girl out of her darker thoughts, and she found the white man watching her in concern. He'd been squeezing her shoulder, likely to snap her out of it. "I…" Sakura sighed before giving herself a good push. "I haven't been having… a good year." He said nothing, allowing her to continue. "Last year, I was… sent away from my family. Father…" Her breath hitched at mentioning him, but she pushed on. "He told me I was going to be with a new family, the Matou's."
The white man wordlessly led Sakura over to a fallen tree, its roots sticking sickly out from the soil. He scrubbed some of the moss away and beckoned for Sakura to sit, which she did with a brief but grateful smile. Once both sat down, she continued. "I… I don't remember much of my time with that family, but… I remember being… afraid. H-hurt. A-Alone. The only one who was… there for me was… U-Uncle Kariya." Tears began to gather in her eyes.
"He… he came to the house last night." Somehow, Sakura managed to keep the story going without crying. "Him and… Father. I-I thought Father didn't… want me anymore…" she admitted between her sniffles. "But they both came… Uncle Kariya brought me to my grandparents' house… To Mother a-and… Big Sister… But… F-Father didn't make it back with us…" Her tears finally broke free and trickled down her cheeks. She cupped them, trying to keep her sobs from being heard. Big Sister always made sure no one saw her cry…
A hand began stroking her back gently, and Sakura peered through her fingers and tears to see the white man watching her softly. "Let it out, dear. There is no shame in mourning the loss of your father."
Somehow, his assurance both eased and weighed on Sakura's heart. "B-But… I don't really know… h-how to f-feel…" She sniffled before continuing. "H-he gave me away… then took me back… a year later… I-I just don't… get it." She could hear a dark voice in the back of her head, telling her to hate Father for casting her aside. To hate her family…
But the white man's presence made it feel so distant, and a bigger sadness welled up. "Uncle Kariya… H-he left yesterday… didn't even say goodbye… to Big Sister… or to m-me…" She felt guilty for being so selfish now. "I-I think… he's not… c-coming back either… M-Mother, she was… c-crying… when she tucked me and… Rin… in… told us… a story…"
As she sat weeping on the log, Sakura felt a little pull, then something soft nudging up to her side. She knew it was the man, and even though this should've been too close (Japan had big rules about "public intimacy," as Father had once explained to her and Rin), she buried her head into his robes. The man didn't push her away despite her probably getting her snot all over him, and for a little while, the young girl could just let it out.
Finally, Sakura calmed herself down enough to glance with red eyes up and mumble, "S-sorry, I-I didn't…" Sure enough, there were damp stains in the side of his nice clean robes.
But the white man just kept rubbing her back. "You have nothing to apologize for, Sakura. Nothing at all." She managed to smile a little, her guilt subsiding just a teensy bit. Then he looked away even while still holding her close and sighed. "I can see now why a girl like you would dream of such a dreary place. You must be seeing little color in your life at present."
Sakura wiped away the last of her tears before looking at the forest like he did. "…I guess so. I mean, I still have Big Sister and Mother a-and I'm happy to have them… again… but…" She couldn't find the right words.
"But you are not certain if you have the right to enjoy this happiness when there is such loss around you?" She looked up in shock at the white man who nodded a little. "You are a kind one, Sakura, even after all the sadness that has befallen one so young. You grieve for your father and your uncle because you love them. But you needn't forget that you still have family in your life." He patted her shoulder before standing up. "And the world is far more than the dreary, lifeless place you believe it to be."
He walked over to the center of the clearing and waved his staff towards the ground. Sakura thought she could hear him mumble something, then the tip glowed as a fire sprang out from it. It was a bright, warm thing that burned easily through the dead grass, tiny wisps of smoke curling in the air. Then the man moved his staff to the right, and the flames followed it instantly. Sakura watched in awe as he turned gracefully around in his spot, circles and circles of fire growing around him that… cleaned the ground. "You're… you're a magus?"
"I do seem capable of wielding magic, yes. Instinctively," he replied, not taking his eyes off his work. Before long, a good part of the ground had been turned to ash, and with a tap of his staff, the flames went out just as they would've reached the trees. "But one should always be mindful of their power, lest it grow out of control." The white man began digging about with his staff in one spot, then another, then he stopped and extended his free hand to her.
Sakura hopped off her seat and eagerly walked over to him, admiring the rings burned into the ground. They were so neat, so symmetrical, they reminded her of tricks Father used to show Rin and her on weekends. The ashes didn't burn her feet, either, no matter where she stepped. The man was smiling as she reached him, and she smiled back before looking down like he was.
There in the holes he dug were tiny specks of green. "The old grass grown over had stifled them," the man explained while he crouched down to her level, "but they were still here. My flames merely unearthed them." He held out a hand and whispered something Sakura didn't understand, then she saw little green buds slowly poke out from the black earth.
"Wow…" She touched a freshly grown bud, amazed at how… healthy it felt against her finger. It was alive, really alive.
She beamed up at the white man who chuckled back. "No matter how dark life may appear, you can always find a little color…" He pushed aside some dirt to reveal more greens. "If you make the effort to look for it."
Sakura giggled, marveling at the life before her, the life brought about by magic… Then her spirit sank again. "I… I can't do what you do," she confessed. "I lost my Magic Circuits somehow when… Father and Uncle Kariya came to get me. I can't do magecraft anymore…"
"Are you sure?" She looked up surprised to find a splash of white before realizing the man had set his staff down next to her. She reached up, then hesitated, but he just smiled at her. Encouraged, Sakura slowly wrapped her fingers one by one around the wood; touching it felt cool but… inviting at the same time. She couldn't lift it, the stick was too long and heavy…
But even after the white man took his hand away so only Sakura was holding it, the crystal at the top began to glow.
It wasn't a blinding light, and it didn't go beyond the staff, but Sakura couldn't take her eyes off it, nor could she stop smiling.
The white man's eyes shined with pride at her. "I think you have a little magic in you after all, Sakura." He then reached for his staff, pausing to ask, "May I?" Sakura happily pushed it towards him, making him laugh as he retrieved it. "The ability to use magic is not so important, though, as how you choose to use it." He nodded at their surroundings.
Sakura looked at the many grey trees, the moss covering them, the dead grass by the roots, and the pale sky hovering over it all. When looking at the big picture, this small patch of green was so tiny. And she wasn't even thinking about… that place. Not yet. "…I can't do what you did here," she concluded sadly. "Could you… do it to the whole forest?"
"Not all at once, I'm afraid," the old man in white gave her an apologetic look. "And neither can you, not at the moment, at least."
"Not… at the moment?" Sakura repeated, her eyes widening again. She could feel something inside her, something dancing with excitement and… hope. Yes, hope. The girl saw the budding flowers by her feet, the magic still prickling around them. She then turned back up at the white man, and for just a moment, she felt she could really see him: Someone brimming with magic, maybe with more magic than Father ever did. A man so powerful, so wise…
And here he was, wanting to help a sad little girl in her sad little dream. "Cleaning the forest would be a fair bit of work, yes," the man spoke frankly. "And it will surely take some time, even with the two of us." He smiled. "But what would you rather see: that which stands before you now…" he gestured with his hands to the ravaged forest surrounding them. Then the crown of his staff lit up, brightening the whole world. "…or that which could be?"
Judging by how his smile widened, she didn't need to say her answer out loud. He offered her his hand again, she took it grinning eagerly, then they happily began their work together.
That morning, even despite the many tragedies that had befallen the previous night, Sakura Tohsaka woke up with a content smile on her face and a sense of achievement in her heart.
Everything was exactly the way as she'd remembered it. The sun painting the entire sky crimson as it set; the ground beneath her awash with blood; armored bodies strewn across the hill with broken weapons sticking about like deadly trees. They had all been her subjects once. Some had remained by her side, others had joined the rebellion…
A rebellion formed because of her.
The King of Knights knelt at the peak of Camlann Hill, her hands loosely grasping the hilt of her sword planted in bloodstained soil. Her head was bowed in shame, her eyes crying at the chance she'd lost. Rather than truly return to the Throne of Heroes, here she was again. The moment she had been fatally wounded on this hill, "King Arthur" had voiced a final prayer, a wish that she could somehow undo her mistakes and save her kingdom even as it had crumbled around her. Thus, a pact between her and the world had been formed.
A pact Artoria had failed to uphold. She had come so close, faced so many dangers and experienced so many things the world she had been summoned to as Saber, fought with all of her strength and that of her partner's… "Kakashi…" she wept, the face of her friend appearing before her mind. "Forgive me…"
The Holy Grail was tainted. Artoria didn't know how it had happened, but the moment she saw that darkness bubbling about it, she had recognized how evil it was. She had thought Kiritsugu mad for seeking the Grail's destruction in the moments beforehand; yet another sign of how little she had understood her Master. God knew how events might've transpired between the two had they only each other to rely upon.
As always, it had been Kakashi Hatake who had grabbed the two by the shoulders and pulled them along towards the main goal. Kiritsugu must have told him about the Grail's corrupted state, and in her present state, Artoria couldn't fault him for that. She wouldn't have believed him, and the time it would've taken him to convince her would've cost them all dearly. But Kakashi had understood the situation completely, and as always, he did his best to make the most out of a rotten situation. Artoria could've only destroyed the Grail, rendering all of their efforts and Irisviel's sacrifice in vain, but he tried to salvage it, free it of the evil within.
She should have cut down Archer and unleashed Excaliburon the darkness the moment it tried to slink back into their world. Kakashi had given everything he had to provide them with one last chance to win the Holy Grail… and Artoria hadn't been strong enough.
Her partner and the students he'd sought to help; her Master, a broken man seeking a miracle; an innocent woman who'd placed all of her faith in the trio; her subjects and her knights, all of whom had trusted her with their lives and hopes, one knight twice over now…
And she had let them all down. Again. "Forgive me…" she mumbled again with greater despair. "Forgive me… I… I…" She peered through her tears at her gauntlets, Mordred's blood splashed upon them anew. Mordred, who had sought her throne right to the bitter end. And what a terrible throne it was. As she seemed to hit the very bottom of the pool her despair had become, Artoria Pendragon wondered once again, "Should I have been…?"
"Don't tell yourself you don't deserve to be a King."
Artoria snapped her head up in shock. She glanced about the hilltop, trying not to let her eyes linger on the bodies' faces, but she was alone as ever. And yet, she could still hear Kakashi's voice clear as day. "I think if you had been born in my home, Artoria, you would've made a splendid Hokage. Maybe even as great as the King you were in Britain."
The young girl continued to cry, but a tiny smile managed to creep onto her lips. "Even here, you still find a way to pick me up again..." And that was the truth. The two Servants hadn't agreed on everything, but that had never stopped the Copy Ninja from supporting her during even the hardest of times. He'd fought beside her, given her advice freely and even tried to ensure they could both still make their wishes despite facing a seemingly hopeless crisis.
Their time as comrades may have only been a week and a half, but Kakashi Hatake had been the best friend and comrade Artoria could've asked for in the Holy Grail War.
For that matter, she couldn't claim to have experienced only pain during the War. She had encountered heroes of other lands and times, even worlds different from the one she had called home. And more than a few of them had impressed her in one way or another:
There was Diarmuid Ua Duibhne, a fellow knight and man of honor who had given her one of the finest duels ever and reminded her why she believed so strongly in chivalry.
There was Jade, a woman fierce and noble; though their interactions were few, she'd supported Artoria's way of kingship and earned her respect. A pity they never fought together…
There was Iskandar, King of Conquerors and leader of Qrow Branwen and Kenpachi Zaraki. None of the three had been men she would've seen herself associating with, and she refused to consider her beliefs inferior to those of Iskandar. But that, she knew now, was what he had expected of her. No matter how they differed in their ways, Artoria acknowledged him as a strong rival and a fellow King with loyal and strong comrades.
There was Gandalf the Gray, a wizard whose skill in magic was rivaled by his wisdom… and surpassed by his compassion. He had criticized and encouraged her ideals in the same breath, kept her from being at the other Kings' throats or letting their words break her spirit. And what he had done for his partner, for her… She may never be able to repay him directly, but Artoria would always be grateful to the great wizard of Middle-Earth.
There was Lancelot, her onetime knight and friend turned enemy, then turned friend once again. A little of her old pain had lessened from their meeting in the clearing, even if she'd kick herself until the end of her days for mismanaging the situation with Lancelot and Guinevere so badly. Artoria had been with him in his final moments, unable to save him…
And he had proudly displayed his faith in her even as he died. "You are… and have… always been… the greatest… amongst the Kings… Arthur. All who served you… believed thus."
And even setting the Servants aside, she had seen what people were capable of in the modern era, both succumbing to their worst… and rising to their best:
Waver Velvet, a naïve boy slowly growing into a man through his Servants' guidance.
Kariya Matou and Tokiomi Tohsaka, rivals with no shortage of mutual animosity putting it all aside for the sake of a little girl in danger.
Maiya Hisau, a stoic soldier still capable of feeling empathy, loyalty… and Artoria guessed by her behavior around a certain shinobi, love.
Irisviel von Einzbern, a homunculus who learned to become a woman and insisted on seeing the beauty of the world and her companions even upon being exposed to darkness.
Even Kiritsugu Emiya, a callous, cynical, unscrupulous man she should've utterly despised despite his wish, risking his own life to stop Megatron from attacking Kakashi.
…And here she was, the great King of Knights, wallowing in self-pity. Hadn't this Holy Grail War taught her anything? Could she really just give up her duties after seeing so many take a stand? Was she truly so weak she would let one more failure stop her from trying again? Well, she mused, I suppose there's only one person who can answer these questions.
She wiped away her tears, then pushed herself up by her sword to stand tall. For better or worse, Artoria Pendragon was the King of Knights. The King of Britain. Thus, this field of dead was her responsibility. She could not forsake it or pass it off to another. Forcing the crown and the burdens it carried on a different soul's head was cowardly and disrespectful. Artoria would try to share these burdens as she had been taught, but abandon them? Never.
She would find a way to start anew, correct her mistakes, honor those who had placed her faith in her. And if it meant she had to wait until the end of time for another chance, then so be it. She would never stop fighting for her people and her comrades.
And as King Arthur stood resolute upon Camlann Hill… far, far away, another, lone Heroic Spirit sank deeper in the shadows, lamenting his failures. His mask and forehead protector could only hide so much of his grief.
Five Days Later
Kiritsugu Emiya walked carefully down the clean halls of Fuyuki General Hospital. This was the first time he'd visited since the day that followed what news channels and papers were already calling the Fuyuki Fire; he couldn't help but wince every time he heard of it. It was bad enough that officials were still finding scorched corpses among the wreckages, or that black smoke still seemed to hover over the city every time he glanced up at the sky. The fact that some people had said in interviews how lucky they'd been not to have been home…
He shook his head in an effort not to let his thoughts stray back to the destruction he'd caused. It was already bad enough dealing with how the fallout affected him personally. Kiritsugu had just gotten off his flight back from Germany. He'd placed his last dregs of hope on the chance he could bluff his way past the Einzberns and get to Illya. He wastechnically the last Master of the Grail War, after all…
But the homunculi wouldn't let him pass if he didn't present the Grail. He'd attempted to barge past them, but between their halberds and the Bounded Field itself barring him, he was blocked. Kiritsugu was still carrying all of the fatigue from the Grail War's ending, too, leaving him with little strength to fight his way through.
His only choice had been to withdraw for the time being. He'd return soon enough and try again, as many times as he needed.
After that temporary setback, there had been little reason to remain in that frosty old country, so he'd used his booked flight and returned here to Fuyuki City. Just without the girl he'd hoped to bring along, shuffling past scores of people trying to catch their flight out in time lest yet another calamity befell the city. Well, what with my track record…
Fortunately, the hospital had once again dodged a bullet. The Fire hadn't spread far enough to reach it. In his first visit here, Kiritsugu had checked up on two people. One of them had been Maiya, dutifully resting in her room as Kakashi's clone had pleaded with her. Even with the Heroic Spirit gone, his hypnosis still seemed to work like a charm; the staff had continued treating their secret patient without issue, all while covering up her personal information.
Maiya had still caught wind of the Fire, of course, having been roused by the sounds of desperate scrambling outside the halls and seeing the great smoke outside her window. She'd kept her head down thankfully, but with every last trauma of the prior night weighing down on him, Kiritsugu had no good news to offer the woman who'd sacrificed so much for him.
And he knew he saw a tear in her eyes when he told her of Kakashi's fate.
Yet Maiya had done the same thing as when they had first met in that god-forsaken country: She pushed aside her own grievances and wanted to know how she could help Kiritsugu. Guilt burning inside him at what he'd done to her in the Grail's test, he'd told her again and again that she didn't owe him a damn thing.
She had nodded and said, "I know. But I want to help you."
Eventually, he'd conceded due to the fact they were currently all either had at the moment. Therefore, Kiritsugu resolved to continue ensuring Maiya's recovery and let her stay at the house once she could leave the hospital safely, for as long as she needed. It was the least he owed her.
And now here he was again, this time checking up on the other soul first. The poor boy he'd found among the ruins… Kiritsugu hadn't actually met the kid again, though truth be told, he had avoided it a little. The nurse Akiko Fukui (a nice young lady, kind of innocent) had assured him that his condition remained stable even five days later, but no one had come to claim him. It seemed as if… he had no living family left. No parents, no siblings, no relatives.
All the staff could find about him was his first name: Shirou.
Kiritsugu read the name again on the little slip of paper Miss Fukui had given him at his first visit. She was here today, too; she'd spotted him immediately upon walking through the front door and waved him over to the front desk. She wasted no time in telling him Shirou's situation hadn't changed, neither physical nor familial. Not a single person had come to pick him up. "Until now," she'd added with a knowing grin before directing Kiritsugu to his room. She'd have probably led him there personally if not for her desk's mountains of paperwork.
The former Mage Killer sighed as he reached his destination. I suppose you'd find something poetic in all of this, wouldn't you, Iri? His wife had been occupying his thoughts for much of these past few days. A bond forming between savior and saved… No doubt that's what the nurse had in mind, too. Why else would she have told him so much about Shirou and what may happen to him if he weren't claimed soon? Before Kiritsugu knew it, his legs had carried him here, to this clean room with occupied beds lining each side and the last one on the right his target.
Well, he had already begun refurbishing the safehouse in Miyama into proper living quarters. Raiga Fujimura had been… little as what one would expect a yakuza leader to be. Oh, he was certainly as dangerous and cunning as any other crime boss Kiritsugu had encountered in his life, but he had also shown an amicable side that actually seemed genuine. Negotiating ownership of the house had gone more smoothly than the fallen mercenary had feared; he hadn't even needed to draw a gun. Raiga also had quite an energetic, playful personality for a man of his age, qualities he'd obviously passed on to his granddaughter.
A bittersweet smile crossed Kiritsugu's lips at the memory of Taiga. A teenaged girl with lively eyes and a brand-new shinai resting on her shoulder who had walked right up to a complete stranger and greeted him with a sunny smile.
Kiritsugu didn't believe in reincarnation, but upon seeing that girl, he could've sworn he was introducing himself to Shirley all over again.
Either way, it made things easier to refurbish what had originally been a simple fallback for the Grail War into a proper home for Kiritsugu, Maiya for however long she wished to stay, and a young child. He'd obviously intended for the third to be Illya, but the house was easily big enough for one more, and Raiga was enthusiastic about sending more stuff over…
So why was Kiritsugu still standing in the hallway?
He made to walk in, but his feet seemed rooted to the floor. Every time he tried to come up with a proper introduction, his words would dry up along with his mouth. His brain was swirling with second thoughts, third and fourth, all of them leading to a single point: Was this really the right decision? Fuyuki's orphanages were pretty responsible, caring institutions based on what Kiritsugu had read about them. They surely wouldn't treat Shirou any worse than if he took him in, and what right did Kiritsugu have to snatch him up? After what he-
"You're not seriously chickening out when you've come this far, are you, Kiritsugu?"
The last Emiya's dark eyes snapped up from staring conflicted at the floor tiles to in front of him. Leaning against the doorframe was Kakashi Hatake just as he remembered him, hands in his pockets, headband pulled down to cover his Sharingan while the other smiled at him. "It's not like you to second-guess yourself this much. …Well, you're usually more covert about it."
Kiritsugu blinked in shock, then closed his eyes. When he opened them again, he noticed a transparence in the ninja's form. You're not really here, are you? He chuckled to himself, knowing the fantasy-Kakashi would hear it. Maybe I'm finally losing what's left of my sanity.
"Maybe you are," "Kakashi" agreed in that annoyingly casual tone of his. "Doesn't make my question any less poignant, though. Who are you and what have you done with Kiritsugu Emiya?"
He's currently submerged in a bottomless pit of despair and self-loathing due to having caused an unspeakable tragedy,Kiritsugu snarked mentally back, some of his tension receding. Besides, if I had done a little more second-guessing, this catastrophe wouldn't have happened. I'm the reason he's sitting in this hospital and his home's nothing but ashes.
There it was, finally put into words. The reason he couldn't walk into that room and face that boy. He had chased blindly after a miracle, cast aside everything that had meant a damn to him, and all he had accomplished was setting the city on fire and ruining hundreds of lives. It's taking everything I've got just to put the pieces of what's left of my life together. How the hell can I think I saved his when I did this to him? What if- He paused, then "said" his worst fear.What if Shirou sees me and realizes that? Kiritsugu wanted to sink into the floor…
But "Kakashi" wasn't about to let him slip away. "The Fire wasn't just your fault, Kiritsugu. But Megatron, Kirei and Angra Mainyu aren't around to share responsibility for it, and let's be honest, they wouldn't even bother." Solid logic as ever. Hallucination or not, Kiritsugu's Servant… turned friend always knew how to slip through the cracks and make him think again. He really should've listened to Kakashi more…
"According to Miss Fukui, the adoption paperwork is pretty simple in these parts, and you don't even need it to take Shirou home, just his consent." "Kakashi" nodded past him to the other wings. "I'm sure Maiya wouldn't mind helping you either. Those two could even look after each other andyou. She's a lot kinder than others may think."
A smirk settled halfway onto Kiritsugu's lips. I bet she'd be happy to know you have such a warm opinion of her.
"W-Well, uh, that's, um, b-beside the point!" The Mage Killer really had cracked if he was having this much fun watching a hallucination blush so much his mask couldn't hide it.
Then the humor faded for both of them. "Look, at the end of the day, you have a chance to help a kid who's lost everything. You saved Shirou's life, and you want to make sure he'll be okay. Isn't that the reason why you're standing here and haven't left?"
…It is, Kiritsugu admitted. I…I want to take care of him, but… I have no idea if he'd accept me. It was a selfish, irrational thought, yet he still couldn't banish the idea of Shirou taking one look at him and realizing he was the man who'd destroyed his life.
"Then why don't you let him make the choice?" "Kakashi" pushed himself off the doorway, stepped into the room and gestured toward the bed. Kiritsugu watched him silently, then he nodded and walked in.
The room wasn't that big, so he reached its end in a few steps. Shirou's red hair was all the brighter with the soot and dirt washed out, and his face was just as clean, too. He glanced up upon hearing Kiritsugu approach, brown eyes widening in recognition. He remembers me. Well, it's not like our meeting was something anyone could forget so easily. But there was no anger or condemnation in his stare, only curiosity.
Kiritsugu caught a look of himself in a nearby mirror. Between the flights to and from Germany, his nights being largely sleepless, and the fact he hadn't even stopped to shave; yeah, he really wasn't looking his best at the moment. In another time and place, the boy might've thought him a street bum. Still, he tried to put on a decent smile and said, "You're Shirou, aren't you? My name is Kiritsugu Emiya."
Shirou didn't move or say a word; it was like Miss Fukui had told him. From what Kiritsugu could tell from the charts or the boy himself, there didn't appear to be any physical damage to his throat. "You seem to be doing better. I'm glad," Kiritsugu noted, but still no response. He just… didn't want to open up. I know the feeling.
He knew what Kakashi would say to that. "Guess you have to take the first step, then."
And so, he did. "Well, I'll level with you. You have two options: Would you rather join an orphanage… or would you like to move in with a man you've just met?" His offer made, Kiritsugu held his breath. All he could do now was let Shirou make his choice… and one way or another, he'd accept all the consequences. No matter what pain they brought.
Shirou sat there silently for a moment, then crossed his arms and scrunched up his face. The sight nearly made Kiritsugu's heart skip a beat; he looked so much like Illya when she was trying to figure something out. Only a child could show such intensity and look so utterly adorable in the same breath. Iri would've snatched him up by now and smothered him with cuddles, but to Kiritsugu, it was a huge relief. I haven't taken everything from him, yet…
Then with a serious frown, Shirou pointed one little index finger at him.
A relieved smile tugged at Kiritsugu's lips followed by a bark of laughter. "Well, there's his answer," Kakashi's voice echoed in his head, and for a moment, he imagined being pushed towards the boy's bed. "What about yours?"
He spared a quick glance behind himself, but nobody was there. Even so, Kiritsugu Emiya knew what his answer was.
"Okay." He promptly set down the bag he'd brought with him and unzipped it. "I'm really… really happy to hear that. Well, first I'd like to introduce you to a friend of mine. Is that okay with you?" A slow nod was his answer. "She's in this hospital, too, but once he's well enough, she'll be coming to live with us for the time being." He quickly moved to pack up what sparse belongings Shirou had, the boy watching him carefully. "Our home needs some cleaning up, but I think you'll like it once all the work's done." The words kept spilling out of Kiritsugu, but he didn't care. A glimmer of hope had reached him, and he didn't want to let go.
Then he paused. "Oh, right. Before we go further… there's one thing I ought to tell you." He considered it, then nodded to himself. He probably wouldn't ever be able to confess to Shirou the full truth, but this much, he ought to know.
Kiritsugu turned and looked his new son in the eye. "Yeah, there's no point keeping this from you… I'm a practitioner of magic."
Silent wonder filled those auburn eyes.
Four Months Later
Maiya squinted as she held the sconce a little closer, then she rubbed its side with her cloth again. Satisfied with the result, she placed it onto a shelf holding similar pieces and walked back to her spot. She eyed the other shelves filled with knick-knacks that others had brought into the store and pawned away. These were just for browsers, of course; valuable items were kept behind the counter Maiya had now reached, and those that could really be considered treasures were locked away in the far back. Though Mr. Watanabe had come to let her try handling customers and evaluating a little over a month ago, that part was still off limits to her. Not that it bothered the retired mercenary. She was content as she was. I better swing by the bakery afterwards. They always make those little cakes today…
The pawn shop was a quiet, decent place just two blocks away from Mount Miyama. Mr. Fujimura had assured her when she decided to apply for its vacancy that its owner and the surrounding neighborhood could be trusted. Best of all, the bus stop was right around the corner, allowing her to travel easily into the Shinto district or return home in little time.
Home… To think Maiya Hisau would ever find herself placing an actual address to that word. It had taken six weeks before the hospital finally allowed her to leave, and even though she still felt a tiny wince in her chest if she breathed too hard after her morning jog, she was back in shape. Kiritsugu had been awaiting her release along with Shirou and a perky young girl who immediately designated Maiya as her new big sister just five minutes after meeting her. What's worse, Maiya still hadn't figured out how to say no to those big brown eyes.
The household was cleaned up for the most part, now; it still lacked some furniture here and there, but with the Fujimura family's help, that problem was well on the way to being solved. Shirou was also recovering step by step. When Kiritsugu had first introduced them, the red-haired boy had been practically a mute even as he had stared so curiously at Maiya. She was familiar with this kind of shock; she'd seen it far too often in her childhood. And in the mirror. Some managed to overcome this "safe mode" they'd retreated to, others didn't.
Maiya sincerely hoped Shirou would prove to be of the former category, and seeing as he'd already begun to speak again (mostly one-syllable words, but progress is progress), her hopes for once weren't for naught. He was a good kid who'd been put through something that would've broken grown men.
All the proof she needed for that conclusion could be found with one glance at Kiritsugu. He had sent another Shadow Clone to Germany yesterday, but aside from trying to reach Illya again and looking after Shirou, there just… wasn't much vigor in his movements these days. Maiya had completely conceded the fight for her savior's heart to Irisivel by now, but her own still ached at watching him go about his days so listlessly.
She shook her head and tried to focus on the books when something trotted silently up to her side. A furry head elevated itself with a pen tucked between its teeth. Maiya's heart grew a little lighter again as she accepted the pen and rubbed the wrinkled head with a little smile. "Thank you, Pakkun." The pug rolled his head appreciatively against her fingers, and she could barely keep herself from cooing. "You're such a sweetheart, yes, you are…"
Pakkun hopped back on all fours and nuzzled against her leg. "Aw, I bet you talk like this to the other boys, too."
"Doesn't mean I'm lying." Both Maiya and Kiritsugu had been very relieved to discover that even with Kakashi… gone, their contract to his hounds still worked. The former had no compunctions for summoning one from the pack whenever she was the only one in the shop, a sort of self-prescribed therapy. Just in case, though, she asked them not to wear their uniforms while in public. The vests and forehead protectors would raise too many questions.
Plus, seeing their leaf symbol or heno-heno-moheji seal reminded her too much of… him.
Maiya ran her pen along the list's side, pausing to jot down a number by some article. Another benefit of her current situation was that she had more time on her hands. Time she used to reach out to some contacts and have them search for someone. She probably wouldn't receive anything solid for a while, but until then, she could enjoy some peace and quiet-
The bell by the door jingled, and Maiya's smile quickly evaporated into a straight line while Pakkun ducked out of sight instantly. The two men walking into the store would never notice his presence. "Good afternoon," she greeted politely as they approached. Her eyes carefully examined the new arrivals: average build, clean shaven, suitable clothing for the weather, no suspicious movements, one carrying a small box still taped up. Most likely just customers.
She eased her grip away from the shotgun beneath the counter as they approached. "Can I help you with anything?"
"Um, yeah," the one with the box said, putting on a nervous smile as he set it down. "I have, uh, a few heirlooms I'd like to offer. And a friend of my wife told me this place is pretty reasonable. Well, uh, not that I think pawn shops are rip-offs or anything!" He hastily added while carefully taking some pieces of jewelry out. "Maybe you could have a look and… tell me if there's anything?"
"Of course." Maiya cast a cursory glance at the goods. A pocket watch with a silver chain, two bracelets, some cufflinks and a silver ring with a gem. "You're welcome to wait here or browse the store if you like, this will take a few minutes." She then looked at the other one. "And you, sir?"
He shrugged with a smile just shy of flirtatious. "Oh, I'm just here as moral support." She nodded, and he just stood there smiling for a moment before coughing into his fist and looking around a bit. His friend just grinned as they both started looking around. Maiya began inspecting the items with care, dully registering their words. "Man, can you believe the stuff that people sell off? What even is half of this?"
A snort from her customer. "That's a candlestick. …From somebody who must've had a fetish for fish."
She set down the ring and moved to the cufflinks; a laugh. "Wow, thanks for putting that image in my head. By the way, Izumi, are you really sure about adding that watch to the stuff? Didn't you say it was an heirloom from your grandma?"
"I need all the money I can get, Shu. The bank's breathing down my family's neck, and with the bakery still having a massive hole in the side, I don't exactly have a surplus of options." The man -Izumi- sighed. "Hell, we got off pretty lucky compared to others."
"You mean Daisuke? Yeah, that sucked. Haven't seen or heard from him since his brother's funeral." Maiya pulled out a magnifying glass and opened the pocket watch. She'd been hearing stories just like this ever since she had started working here. Wrecked homes, injuries, lives lost… All casualties of that damned "Holy" Grail.
Most of the shop's customers were just like Izumi, desperately offering whatever trinkets they had for a little more money. Some offered bigger articles like sewing machines or clocks, others were particularly forceful; Maiya almost got into a fistfight the other day with a woman who felt cheated she was getting so little for (mostly fake) necklaces. But she didn't hold it against her; they were all just trying to put their lives back in order. This is why I told Kiritsugu not to visit me at work, she sighed to herself, running a gloved finger along the chain. Five minutes of listening to this, and he'd probably try to eat a gun.
"…talked with her after mass." Shu's voice brought her mind back to the present. He was fiddling with something in the far corner. "I told her I was going to help you, then we'd catch up for some tea in an hour. You can come along, too, I know Fukui wouldn't mind."
Izumi smiled again, putting a leather belt with engravings back in its place. "Thanks, I might take you up on that. God, it's been a while since I've seen her. Nothing's happened here for four months, and I still feel so gloomy… Father Kotomine seemed in a pretty good mood today, though."
Maiya froze.
Shu was ambling back to the counter with a nod. "Can't say I really get his sermons. I always feel like there's more to them, or he's trying to say something else, but I just can't figure it out. I swear, I think he gets a kick out of it."
"Yeah, you wouldn't be the only one. Kyouko's given up on figuring him out. And have you seen how tall he is? You'd think the guy was a former boxer or something, not a priest."
"I shook hands with him after mass once, thought he was gonna snap my wrist off." The men shared a laugh. "Who knows, maybe he does yoga in his spare time or something."
"Do priests even have spare time? They've got churches to look after, masses, all that stuff." Izumi's good mood flickered just a little as they returned to the counter, but their chatter gave Maiya a chance to recollect herself. "Sorry, do you need any more time?"
She adopted a polite smile. "No, if you're ready to talk business, then by all means. They're all in very well-kept condition," she gestured to the rings before holding up the bracelet, "though this one shows a little wear-and-tear." They then spent about four minutes discussing price range until Izumi accepted the final offer. He then left the shop with an empty box and assurances that the shop would keep his grandmother's watch should he want to buy it back; Shu left without Maiya's phone number.
Once the door jingled, Maiya's hands started shaking.
She braced herself against the counter and took a deep breath, but her mind was reeling. Kirei Kotomine alive?! How's that possible? Kiritsugu shot him dead and blew his body to pieces! Her hand was already drifting back to the shotgun, but she drew it away and spun around. Come to think of it, an old man had pawned off his hunting rifle about a week ago. It was in fine condition aside from a little mileage…
"Maiya, Maiya, calm down!" She almost tripped over Pakkun as the pug put his body in front of her legs. Bracing a hand against the counter to regain her balance, she looked down to find two black little eyes staring worriedly back at her. "You can't just run out and attack him!"
Maiya knelt down with a sigh and cradled his face. "Pakkun, you know how dangerous Kotomine is, and he's out there right now! What if he's still targeting Kiritsugu? What if he goes after Taiga or Shirou? We can't take any chances with him-"
"Which is why we need to be smart about this," Pakkun got up on his hind legs and placed both paws on her cheeks. "Trust me, none of us have forgotten about that bastard. Shiba's still nursing a bruise on his jaw," a scowl briefly flashed across Maiya's face, prompting him to hastily continue, "but we gave as good as we got and paid him back hard for what he did to Irisviel too. If he's still alive and kicking after everything Kiritsugu did to him, though, then something must've happened to him. We can't be reckless."
She gazed into those eyes as they pleaded with her, and her resistance crumbled. Pakkun was right: Kirei Kotomine had been a deadly adversary during the War, and if he had survived it, that could mean he had become even deadlier. They needed more information before assaulting him, and she knew that. What am I, some testosterone-pumped rookie jumping headfirst into danger? Maiya scolded herself rubbing Pakkun's head. "You're right, boy. We have to play this smart."
Pakkun rumbled in relief and retracted his paws. "Exactly. So, if you want, I can sneak out and do a little recon work. Even if that 'holy' man's hiding away in another church, I haven't forgotten his stink." She nodded and stood up to let him trot past her. "I'll let you and Kiritsugu know what I find tonight-"
"No." He stopped and turned around in mild confusion. Maiya didn't realize she'd said the word until it came out, her own thoughts rummaging about. She sighed before elaborating. "I mean… I'm not sure we should tell Kiritsugu about this."
The pug's eyes widened. "What, are you serious? After all the grief that bastard caused him… He has to know about this. Kiritsugu won't stop until he's finished the job."
The Mage Killer's former protégé walked slowly back to the counter, rubbing a hand along its edge. "That's why I think he shouldn't know. At least not now, Pakkun. He's… not the man he was when he joined the Grail War." Her shoulders slumped at the admission. "He mentioned to me he's been having a little trouble with his Magic Circuits. And Akino told me something similar about his od through scent." Pakkun nodded slowly. "And… I can see it in his eyes, his body. He's… defeated." A solitary tear gathered in Maiya's eye, but she quickly thumbed it away. "I don't doubt Kiritsugu would go back to fighting if he learned Kotomine was out there, but I'm not sure he'd survive, let alone win. Not the way he is now.
"Besides, he's barely holding himself together with whatever happiness he can find spending time with Shirou and hoping to get his daughter back. Should we really poke a hole in all that by telling him his worst enemy's still alive in this city?" Maiya Hisau faced her fuzzy little friend, roles of the usual silent pleading reversed for once.
Pakkun dipped his head and whimpered in defeat. "…Then I guess it's up to us, isn't it?" He looked up in time to see her nod. "B-but I can't keep this from the pack, Maiya."
"I'm not asking you to," she assured him before crouching down to pick the little pug up. She straightened and placed him atop the counter so they were at equal eye level. "I'm sorry, Pakkun. I know I'm asking a lot of you and the others; I'd handle this alone if I could-"
He bopped his head against hers. "I know. But you shouldn't have to." They stayed there nuzzling each other for a little while, then Pakkun continued. "Y'know, the last time Kakashi summoned the whole pack, he asked us to keep an eye on you." He snickered a little, clearly noticing how she'd stiffened and earning a mock glare for that. "Now, he did say we should look out for Kiritsugu and… Irisviel, too, but he said your name first. We didn't know if we'd still be around after the War or what would happen, but… we're still here. And we'll always help you." His usual frown became a wide smile. "We're dogs. Loyalty is our defining trait."
Maiya smiled back before pulling the hound into a little hug. The better so he couldn't see her tearing up again. Gone for four months, and you're still making me miss you, she sighed into Pakkun's fur. You're an infuriating man, Kakashi Hatake… Though I should thank you for leaving behind these little darlings. She released him while still stroking his head. "Thank you, Pakkun. We weren't sure the jutsu would work, but… I'm really glad you're still with us. All of you." Another sigh. "I just want to protect Kiritsugu. And Shirou. Taiga, too…"
"So do we," Pakkun replied with a little lick on her nose. Maiya couldn't stop a little giggle from escaping her. "Don't forget, we've got a personal stake in this, too. After everything Kotomine did, especially with his Assassin puppets putting you in the hospital, Bull and Urushi both still think he got off easy in our last encounter. You'd do the same for us."
"Of course," Maiya agreed immediately. She planted a kiss on his snout before swearing with utter solemnity, "I'll annihilate anyone who dares to hurt one hair on my fluffy boys."
Pakkun whined in delight, wagging his stubby little tail. "I love you, too, Maiya."
Sadly, the touching moment between human and hound was cut short when both heard the door's jingle. Pakkun swiftly ducked away again as a delivery woman walked up to an impassive Maiya, small package balanced on one hand. "Package for a Miss Maiya Hisau."
She kept her face straight as she signed the form and exchanged goodbyes with the woman. Once they were alone again, Pakkun hopped back onto the counter as she inspected it. It was wrapped up well, but Maiya could feel something solid in the center, like a box. The address did indeed have her name but listed the shop, but no return address, which bothered her; someone obviously knew this was where she worked and was sure she'd receive it. Maiya had few associates, though, and none of whom she'd shared this address with. Whoever knew about this place… do they know about the house? Where Kiritsugu is?
Pakkun's snout hovered over the package, sniffing it a few times before shaking his head. The boys had received basic bomb squad training, so he'd have known immediately if someone had sent Maiya a bomb. Nevertheless, she grabbed a pair of scissors and carefully pealed it open. No such thing as being too careful in her old line of work…
Something sprang out, narrowly missing her head. Woman and pug heard a splashing sound behind them and whirled around to stare in shock at a crimson liquid splattered all over the wall. It reminded Maiya a little too much of blood for comfort, but neither smelled a hint of iron even while it dripped to the floor. What in the…? Then before their wide eyes, the liquid coalesced and writ itself into legible Japanese letters:
"Café opposite from Yatsushirodai Elementary. Meet there at sixteen-hundred hours, Thursday. Come alone."
For the next few minutes, Maiya just stared at the message that looked like it belonged in a horror movie. Finally, Pakkun asked, "…Who do you think sent this?"
"I… I have no idea." She turned back towards the package, but the only thing inside the wrappings was a little box with a spring in it. No clue or further information no matter how much she rifled about. Finally, she sighed and turned back towards the wall. Good thing I didn't get this while anyone was around, she eyed the "blood" dripping towards the floor. That better clean off easy… "If I ignore this, it might mean trouble… but it feels like a trap."
"Don't need my nose to smell that," Pakkun barked in agreement. He then tilted his head. "Well, the message told you to come alone… but that doesn't mean… you have to go, Maiya."
She eyed him in confusion before the meaning of his words dawned on her. "A Shadow Clone…" Maiya nodded, a plan already forming in her mind. Yatsushirodai Elementary school was just outside the city, Kiritsugu had driven out there to see if Shirou could enroll. Today was Tuesday, so a clone she'd summon had some time to prepare. Maybe set up a sniper's position… "Looks like another thing we can't tell Kiritsugu about. For now…"
That's when they both noticed the "blood" hadn't fully settled yet. In fact, more letters were forming beneath the meeting request. "What in the…?" Pakkun mumbled beside her. "…PS?" Further instructions? A curse activating now that they'd been drawn in? Before she could look away, Maiya's eyes were already reading the new words:
"PS: If you're comparing this message to some written-in-the-victim's-own-blood cliché from a horror story… then you obviously have zero sense of humor. Big Time."
The "blood" stopped, and Maiya turned away, frown still in place. "Where did I put that rifle again?" Pakkun just grunted.
Half A Year Later
It was raining. The sky was filled with grey clouds, and little droplets of rain fell down without end upon the assembled group. They weren't particularly strong, so the umbrellas and thick black coats provided enough protection, yet they lent this occasion the proper lugubriosity.
Rin had been spending a lot of her free time burying her nose in books from the library or her father's workshop these past six months. …Father…
Six months. That was how long it had taken to convince the Magus Association to have Tokiomi's body returned from their "investigations" and the Tohsaka Magic Crest passed on to his heir, as befitting the rules of their society. Rin had already received the first part of said Crest, her left wrist aching from the intricate seal placed there. It was the smallest pain today.
She didn't want to be here. She didn't want to watch what remained of the man she admired above all be lowered into the ground and then be shoveled over with dirt. She didn't want to listen to the priest's endless droning on of words he probably said at every funeral; her time with Kirei hadn't exactly endeared the heir of the Tohsaka family to holy men. She didn't want to see that marker bearing the name, "Tohsaka Tokiomi."
But she made herself face the proceedings, showing no emotion, no grief. Always elegant, such was the creed of her family. Father had schooled her with these words time and again, and she wouldn't let him down. Least of all on today of all days.
A little pressure by her hand reminded Rin of one little consolation: She wasn't facing this alone.
Aoi stood at the front of the gathering, the picture-perfect symbol of dignified mourning. From the black dress she wore to her straight posture to the stoic mien her face wore as she gazed upon the grave; one might've mistaken her for a statue. The only hints of her grief could be found in how tightly she held onto the hands of her daughters on either side.
As the youngest, one would've thought Sakura would struggle the most with keeping her expression neutral. However, she maintained her dignity just about as well as her older sister, having been prepared for this day like her (and receiving a few extra lessons in her dreams). "Not all tears are evil," he'd told her, "And you will know when the time for them has come."
"…I myself will see Him with my own eyes," the priest intoned from his book, an umbrella hovering over to protect the pages, "I, and not another. How my heart yearns within me… Amen."
That final word rippled out among the assembled, hanging in the air for a few seconds. Befitting his high status and the prestige of the Tohsaka's, the final ceremony for Tokiomi had quite a sizable audience. Friends and onetime classmates alike, as well as representatives of the Magus Association simply there to ensure it all went smoothly or take their measure of Tokiomi's successor.
Aoi had warned her girls in advance of the eyes that would be upon them, thus they both kept their composure all the more. No outsider magus would find them sobbing wrecks, and Rin in particular wasn't about to let anyone judge her unfit to take up her father's duties.
The coffin was lowered steadily into the ground and slowly covered with earth, no haste or sloppiness in the entire procedure. Tokiomi would've approved; a sentiment voiced by quite a few who went on to offer their condolences to the woman and two girls he'd left behind. They all went through the motions, nodding and thanking them for the kind words like their mother was doing. At least the rain had stopped for now. Many an umbrella was quickly shut.
The crowd soon began to disperse. By the time the grave was nearly completely filled, only the Tohsaka family and two other men remained. Aoi turned to one of them and asked, "Kirei, could you please ready the car? We will be with you shortly."
"Of course, ma'am." The priest, stoic as ever, inclined his head and turned on his heel to head for the parking area. Rin's demeanor lightened just a little at watching him go.
Aoi graced her husband's grave with one final forlorn look, then nudged her daughters' arms. "Are you ready, Rin? Sakura?" They both nodded, their hands tightening around hers. She then slowly walked away with them in tow, stopping only at another gravestone more rows down. It was nowhere near as extravagant as Tokiomi's, of course, but it remained well-kept enough so anyone could clearly read the name engraved there:
"Zenjou Kariya"
All three spared a moment to offer the grave a brief prayer, Sakura taking the longest. Aoi had to cut hers short upon hearing the footsteps of the one other man. "Curious," he began. "I have no knowledge of there being a Kariya in the Zenjou family. Our records mention a Kariya Matou, though he has not been heard of prior to joining the Holy Grail War."
The daughters picked up on their mother's telling gaze and moved on for the car, leaving the adults behind. "We weren't related by blood, no." Aoi explained calmly, her features softening as she idly traced a finger along the stone. "But I considered him family for a long time, and I encouraged my daughters to do the same. It seemed fitting, considering he had… issues with his own family." Her hand fell away when she shrugged. "The Matou's have made no effort to claim his body, so I imagine I won't be hearing any protests from them."
"I see." The man nodded in understanding, his spectacles bouncing against his nose. He wore a black three-piece suit with a red tie and a polite smile. "We have no intention of interfering with dealings between you and the Matou family, of course."
"The Matou family has not been an ally of the Tohsaka family for some time." Aoi Tohsaka began to walk after her daughters, her eyes locked on those two little black-haired heads. "We do not intend to start a fight with them anytime soon, but they have no place in our affairs." She glanced at the man from the side. "I trust we can continue this discussion at our home?"
"Of course," the pawn of the Magus Association shifted to the smile she'd seen on used-car salesmen and politicians. "If I may, I shall meet you there, Lady Tohsaka."
"I'll be waiting." With that, he walked down a separate path from her, casually treading upon one or two graves as she noted. Aoi allowed herself a quick sigh, then squared her shoulders and increased her walking speed. She'd been steeling herself for this. She couldn't falter now.
The ride back to Tohsaka manor was silent, heavily so. Aoi, Sakura and Rin couldn't think of anything to say; Kirei was content with letting them stew in their own sadness. He figured turning on the radio to a cheery tune would be poking the bear too much. There were other, subtler ways of entertaining himself.
Then they had arrived home, and once she had unlocked the front door, Aoi flashed both of her girls an apologetic smile. "There's a man from the Magus Association who will be arriving soon. We'll be discussing some final details, nothing too troublesome." I hope, she added to herself. "Would you please avoid this man while he is here?"
"Of course, Mother," Rin answered for both of them, her hand in Sakura's. Aoi's heart ached at how composed a face her little girl was still making. Sakura's eyes were downcast, but she was holding herself together rather well. We've made you both grow up far too fast, haven't we? Aoi lamented silently, her eyes drawn to the simple twin tails Rin's hair had returned to.
Her daughters walked hand-in-hand towards the stairs, and Kirei stepped within her sight. "Do you wish for me to be present at this meeting, ma'am?"
"No thank you, Kirei," Aoi declined his offer politely, "though there are a few matters you and I will need to discuss afterwards. You'll be departing soon, correct?" He nodded, prompting her to extend a hand. "Then please make yourself comfortable."
She watched the priest turn on his heel and walk obediently in the direction of the living room, then the sound of a motor made her look towards the garden. A black car was parked outside, and the man from before stepped through the gate, the Bounded Field temporarily deactivated to permit him entry. Yes, better to keep a fighter like Kirei close by should he be needed. Aoi however watched evenly as the representative of the Magus Association approached. Even without magecraft, she refused to be intimidated in her own home.
Pleasantries were exchanged, then she beckoned for the man to follow her to Tokiomi's former office. He offered no name, and truth be told, she couldn't care to ask him for it. The interim head of the Tohsaka family had enough weighing on her mind today.
Once inside the lavish room, Aoi offered him a chair. "Would you care for some tea?"
"If it's no trouble." Fortunately, she had prepared a cooker in advance (thanks heavens she'd convinced Tokiomi to have some electricity outlets installed in this room), so two cups were quickly prepared and to be enjoyed. The magus accepted his with a nod, leaning back slightly in his seat. "Now then, you may already know why my superiors have arranged this meeting on such a day."
Aoi set her tea on the repaired desk; she secretly enjoyed the knowledge that those two handprints that had once been pressed into the wood were of feminine form. You knew how to emphasize your points, Jade… Out loud, she said, "I can imagine." She sat down in Tokiomi's chair and shifted forward. "The Association seeks reassurances of my family's stability."
He flashed her that same smile as in the cemetery. "With respect, Lady Aoi, you were not born of the Tohsaka family, and this is a very important matter. We've managed to clean up most of the Holy Grail War's affairs, but Fuyuki City is still missing a Second Owner. That position cannot be taken lightly, which I'm certain your daughter knows." He bent down to open his briefcase, missing the cold gaze Aoi shot him. He straightened with a file which he passed to her: A copy of Tokiomi's will. "According to his testament, Kirei Kotomine has been declared the official guardian for both of your daughters-"
"Yes, an official guardian whose authority is still second to mine." She interrupted him while flipping through the documents. Finally, she tapped a finger against one sheet. "That is clearly outlined in this paragraph right here."
Truth be told, Aoi was not entirely sure whether she could trust Kirei. Tokiomi had vouched for his student's reliability, but as this whole debacle had revealed, he had been wrong before. Rin certainly didn't seem to like her teacher, though he always treated her with civility even when her mother supposedly wasn't watching. Aoi couldn't simply dismiss him; he knew too much of their family and certainly had his uses. Best to keep an eye on him for now.
Aoi had also taken legal measures to ensure all financial business under the Tohsaka name would be done with her direct supervision. She'd handled it well enough alongside Tokiomi; in fact, she'd taught him a few things.
The Magus Association lapdog was visibly taken back, making her lift an eyebrow. "Do you think I spend my days idly watching my daughters play together and practicing how to look elegant at dinner parties, sir?" Aoi questioned him a little icily. "I cannot practice magecraft myself, but I am well aware of the laws and restrictions of your Association. According to my late husband's testament, I am entrusted with watching over both Rin and Sakura at least as much as Father Kirei is. I therefore have the right to accept or refuse outside aid as I see fit."
"I mean… no disrespect… It's just… the head of the Tohsaka family…"
"Until my eldest daughter is of age, I am the interim head of the Tohsaka family and thereby Fuyuki City's Second Owner. Such is the will of Tokiomi Tohsaka as he has clearly stated." She sipped her tea, no change in her demeanor whatsoever. "I respect your organization's traditions and have complete confidence in your ability to adhere to them as much as my husband and his ancestors have. I will certainly keep them in mind."
The representative shuffled about in his seat. Clearly, he hadn't anticipated such resistance. Had his superiors told him she was some powerless widow? If so, Aoi felt no shame in dissuading him of this notion. "It seems… such is the case." He made an obvious attempt to salvage the situation (and his pride). "But there remains… the matter of your… other daughter. Her situation seems more complex."
Aoi set her tea down with a nod. "I understand there may be some reservations, so allow me to explain in simple terms: Over a year ago, Tokiomi allowed Sakura to be adopted by the Matou family as their heir. During the Grail War, he learned from a member of theirs how she had been affected by her time there." Practicing this speech in advance was the only reason she could recite it now without showing any emotion. "Sakura was recovered and is once again a Tohsaka in blood and name. It's for the best concerning her conversion."
"Conversion," the magus repeated, obviously believing he'd found a foothold. "A rather clinical term for the apparent loss of all her Magic Circuits." He placed his own tea in the desk, some of it splashing it out onto the wood. "Now, you may not know this, Lady Aoi, but Magic Circuits don't simply vanish into thin air. But during today's proceedings, I couldn't detect the slightest trace of magic from her." He spread his arms placatingly. "This needs to be investigated. Clock Tower offers many facilities for research and professional analysts."
"I don't doubt the competence of Clock Tower's facilities or analysts." A slight edge slipped into Aoi's tone before she recomposed herself. She opened a drawer and withdrew a set of papers which the Association's stooge received. "As you yourself stated, though, Sakura is not a magus anymore. Even if she once possessed the potential for magecraft, she is now as normal a person as I am, and that gives me the right to refuse your kind offer."
He inspected the documents, his brow furrowing more with each passing second. Luckily, Tokiomi had been able to research and invoke the proper laws and ensure Sakura's safety before he'd been killed. The Association could surely try to counter this, but Aoi was proving in her current discussion that a legal clash would be lengthy and possibly not worth it.
Thus, he had no chance but to offer her a tight smile. "Well, everything seems in order. Should your daughter recover her Magic Circuits, though…"
Aoi knew a veiled threat when she heard one, so she defused it. "I shall inform your superiors immediately if that proves the case. In the meantime, Sakura will be observed as how I and Kirei Kotomine, if need be, believe best. I don't intend to take chances with her safety or Rin's." She then rose from her chair and offered the magus her hand. "Thank you for your time."
"Thank you for yours… Lady Tohsaka." He bit out while shaking her hand a little more tightly than was polite. His smile only grew stiffer when she showed no sign of pain, but he collected his documents in his little briefcase and made for the door. Opening it revealed Kirei outside, as she'd expected. "Do inform us if you require our aid." Then the magus left.
No sooner did the door click shut than the tears began to flow. Aoi slumped forward against her desk- no, her husband's desk, resting her face in her hands as she wept.
She knew this wouldn't the last "meeting" she'd be in for. Their family's blood had been spilled; the sharks were circling. The Magus Association would only be placated for so long by their own laws, and they were surely searching for loopholes already, excuses to take away the Tohsaka's status as Second Owner and claim Sakura. I can't lose her again… I-I can't… lose either of them… Sakura… R-Rin…
The Magus Association's snooping about had led to the discovery of the Fourth Grail War's incomplete conclusion. According to their analysis, the Fifth Grail War would take place much earlier than usual; their estimate was ten years.
Ten years. Ten years before this happened all over again. Ten years for Rin to prepare before she was to be the Tohsaka family's Master. Worst of all, Aoi knew Rin wantedto step up. She wanted to follow in her father's footsteps and succeed where he failed. And there was no convincing her otherwise; she was too stubborn, and the pain was too fresh. They'd just buried Tokiomi.
Wh-What am I supposed to do…? Aoi fell back into his chair. How long can I keep the Association at bay? How can I convince Rin not to throw her life away? How do I protect Sakura…? What would you do…?
The mother sighed. There was no point in begging the dead for favors. She wasn't even sure who she had asked in this moment. But like it or not, she was all Rin and Sakura had left. Other had laid the groundwork for these two coming together. Tokiomi had bought them time and some breathing room. Jade had opened his eyes in the first place. And Kariya… Kariya had accepted his fate believing she'd keep her promise.
"Promise me, Aoi. Promise me that Sakura and Rin will play together, cry together, and grow up together."
In a way, Aoi hadn't made that promise to just Kariya, but to all three of them. Kariya, Tokiomi, Jade… They, maybe others she didn't even know about, had all given everything to make this miracle reality. She couldn't let their efforts go to waste. She didn't have magecraft, but she refused to be the same helpless housewife who'd stood silently by and let Sakura be dragged off to God knows what.
So, she'd fight for them another way. If she couldn't fight with spells and martial arts, she'd use rules and connections. She'd take up the face of an iron woman with a cold heart. She'd used anything at her disposal, like Kirei. Aoi Tohsaka would do everything it took to protect the two most precious things in her world until they didn't need her protection anymore.