In the corner of the ballroom, he stood.
Lean and strong, slim but powerful. The essence of a knight, the shiniest of them all.
That, was Lancelot.
The most wonderful and trustable human being I ever had in my life, the first and best friend, my personal knight.
Saying I lived until now only to look at him every possible day and time sounded so unbelievable and childish. But that's what I like to think.
He made me go feral, and I was a gracious, now at age, princess. The second heir of the throne, that luckily has a bigger brother more suited for that role that released me from all the hard and adult world of politics and leadership. I was the small sheep of the family, cared and cuddled. And with the best personal guard.
I couldn't take my eyes off him, even when I was the one in the spotlight, the day of my birth anniversary.
Such beautiful person, inside and outside, shouldn't be near someone like me, empty and spoiled.
His hair always clean and tidy, lifted from his forehead and parted in the middle towards the sides, his rebel tips constantly defined gravity all over his head, the waves gently caressing his face and neck. The urge to move it and ruffle him was overwhelming and omnipresent. How I did resist all my existence was an unknown miracle.
He changed from his usual armour I saw him earlier that day with, I didn't know exactly when as I had to keep my eyes on check not to stare too much and give attention to those royal pains.
Now, a white shirt, covered by a full black look fitted him like a second skin.
A dovetail jacket that worked as a waistcoat on the front, all adorned with gold trim, two long loose belts falling from the small of his back. Everything enhanced his well shaped proportions. Actually, his chest might have been rounder and softer than mine. Sadly, I hadn't experiences such pleasure from Heaven by hand.
And that silhouette, moulded by gods and seraphs' hands on their blessed and most productive days. A masterpiece my heart craved to englobe.
The skin-tight pants made me want to slap those thighs hard it was difficult to not look, again. I wondered if to everyone I seemed like I kept rolling my eyes, or blinking indeterminate times as if something was stuck in my pupils. Yes, that angelic vision of Lancey.
But, main point of his legs was that whoever designed those boots knew what they were doing. Actually, that someone needed a medal, from the undersigned princess. A big one. Let it be accompanied by a handwritten letter of gratitude.
Those half thighs high, glossy, leather black boots were my condemnation to Hell, if it existed, in that spot and in that moment.
He was illegal.
The ribbon crossed over his neck with a small gem embedded with the kingdom flower crest, all the blue details highlighted his crystal icy eyes at best. Those big clear pupils I've seen many days yet I searched for them even more. I never wanted to stop to lose myself in them, never stop to look at him.
Those eyes that were not looking a me.
He was food for my body, mind and soul. He was the brightest gem of my heart, the person I couldn't care more for. He was family. Yet he couldn't be. Something deeper was growing within me, yet unknown to my futile knowledge.
That also meant we were never going to be something real, together.
All my hopes were burnt from the beginning, tearing my heart with slow and deadly shreds, every day, more and more.
We were in two different world, yet, we collided as an anomaly we couldn't reach, and fix.
I exempted myself from the circle of extravagant people talking their success in economy to join my father, speaking with the King of Erule, the neighbour kingdom. I was anxious about approaching them but I couldn't listen to any more big words from those nobles.
"Father." I made myself noticeable by patting gently on the Rylan' shoulder. He excused himself kindly and both Kings nodded, raising their thin tall glasses towards me.
"Namiya, sweetheart. Are you enjoying yourself? Today shall be all yours." He moved to fit me between them and I slightly frowned. I had to be careful to what I say.
"Aye, Father. It couldn't be better; I thank you from the bottom of my heart." Well, I for once wanted to experience a simple private party, just my brother, Lancelot and I. Maybe next time.
"We shall dance, my daughter, the day will soon be over." He placed the glass on a tray a butler was holding on his side and gently pulled my hand.
The banquet hall grew silence as we approached the middle of the room. The gigantic chandeliers over our heads created a soft warm light, reflecting onto the now dark windows and the white and gold walls. The small orchestra on the stage started playing a slow melody.
We moved slowly in gracious movements, a dance proof of our family bond. His light grey hair was pulled back, the typical hairstyle my brother wore at event and when patrolling. His brown eyes, different to ours looked tired, like he didn't rest well for such important event.
"Namiya dear, it's finally your time to shine. I've been eager to share with you a wonderful news, but before officially herald it to the public I wanted to hear your opinion."
"Does something worry you, Father?" I asked curiously. He never did someone hidden from me, especially for me. Was it my Birthday present? I had enough of them now stored in my bedroom, tomorrow was the time to sort them out.
"I realised we had to strengthen our bond between kingdoms, after the war our pact worked wonderfully and we're blooming at the most. The Erule kingdom has great people and have very good education and a potent will to grow." He held my hand strongly, I didn't know what to expect, but he sounded nervous, and worried.
Was it something that would change my life? But how, he was merely talking about the greatness of our ally?
"I arranged a wedding between you and Prince Seruel, the family was kind enough to come here to welcome you and escort you back to Erulesse, where the wedding will take place." He exhaled with a serious face, looking straight at me.
But I felt blank. I stopped dancing, dropping my hands down. Shocked was a small word compared to how confused and messy I felt. As a massive rock dropped on me, confining me in a dark hole with no exits, no space to move.
So that was what my fated future was planned as?
I honestly couldn't believe it.
I didn't want to believe it.
This was signed as the date of my freedom, not as the beginning of my fate as the scapegoat of our kingdoms' relationship.
"W-what? How did you mean to listen to my opinion if you already arranged everything?" I asked desperately, my voice trembling from anxiety.
Why didn't I expect that something insultingly like a contract marriage would happen? Was this how I would be used as an object to the reign, that profaned peace that much? Becoming a vassal? How long has he been actually planning everything?
"We're thinking about our best future, sweetheart. I-"
"We?" I asked, interrupting him, before a hand placed on his shoulder, the fiery familiar hair entering my vision field.
"I'll take care of her, Father." King Rylan simply nodded, his mouth still open but speechless, and retraced his steps back to the guests.
It was time for the second family dance. And confronting.
My brother, the first prince, heir of the throne, Percival.
As he gently pulled me into a caring embrace, one I never experienced from him, given his cold attitude and affection, his face furrowed.
"Listen carefully, Nim. Sometimes we can only fight in order to bring peace and prosperity to our home. The marriage idea was mine alone, don't bring any anger towards Father. Promise me something."
I still couldn't get my head around it, as we slowly moved our feet to the music. He wasn't a great dancer, but at least he was at ease in my arms.
"What?" I simply questioned. I didn't wish to think about it, I wanted to roll back in time and change path. He came closer, approaching his face near my ear, his long hair on the neck tingling my skin.
"Tonight, don't go out of your room, for any reason. Are you listening?"
Our dance lasted even less than the one before, because I couldn't take it any more. My emotion were swelling as many thoughts were fogging my mind. I wanted to escape to consider everything peacefully and find a reason for what I've been told in those minutes.
I stepped back, holding my skirt up, bowing at him as a thanks for the dance.
"I'm not feeling very well so I'll excuse myself, Brother."
"Namiya, promise." He whispered, tilting his head forward as a response to my gesture, the words not fitting with our movements.
But I didn't answer. For the first time I felt betrayed, abandoned from my own blood and flesh, my family.
The King words were stranger to me and Percival's cold attitude didn't help, it never did. I wanted to sort out my feelings, and think rationally for once.
I never knew what I wanted to do in my life, everything was given to me. But I never expected or wanted any of this.