Eric snorted and said sarcastically, "I doubt it." Kelso exclaimed loudly. "Oh! That is a burn." Eric was taken aback. "Wait. What? No, l- No, I didn't- I didn't mean it like that." Donna was visibly pissed of. Jackie added casually, "Nope, sorry, Eric,that was a burn. And what's burnt is burnt. And what's burnt is Donna." Donna pushed Eric's arm angrily. "We're out of fun things to do? You're already bored of your girlfriend?" Eric laughed awkwardly and said, "No, I meant this town… not you, pretty lady." Kelso laughed dumbly and said, "Hey, you know what'd be fun? Is if we were in an Alfred Hitchcock movie right now… and we didn't know it, and then someone told us… and we're like, "Oh, man, I'm in a movie."" Kelso's face turned serious and he broke the 4th wall, looking straight into the camera. Then, it was me, Donna, Eric, Jackie, and Fez. The 4th wall break was just for a second. Donna grumbled with annoyance and said, "Yeah, okay, I'm outta here." "Wait, but I thought we-" Eric was flabbergasted. "Get bent." She cursed him. He accepted his punishment instantly, "Okay, I'll do that." Fez walked towards Eric who's back to bouncing his neon yellow ball."You know what will cheer you up? A little trick-or-treating." Fez said happily. But Eric ignored him. "Hello? Stop bouncing that damn ball and let's do something." Eric sighed and said sarcastically, "Yeah, you know, I can't, Fez, 'cause I can't even look at you. I don't know whether to throw you out or… throw you down and make sweet love to you." I furrowed my eyebrows and quipped, "You know, that says more about you than it does him." Flabbergasted, Eric shouted, "Well, I'm not the one dressed like a damn girl!" Fez grabbed the neon ball midair and taunted Eric with it. "Well, the damn girl has your ball." He laughed happily and ran outside to the yard. "Like I care about a-" Eric tried to pretend he was fine with it, but he was attached. "Man, that's my ball." Eric ran away to chase after Fez. "Hey, you guys, you wanna go outside and watch Eric and Fez run around?" Kelso asked giddily. He added as he tried to open up another can of soda. "Someone might get hurt. It's funny when people get hurt. "Especially when they're in their underwear." I snickered. "That's great." Jackie insulted Kelso, "The only person dumb enough to get hurt around here is you." Kelso snorted, "Okay, Jackie, I'm really starting to get sick- AH!" His fingers were squished by the can opener on his can of soda. He opened it, but it scratched his skin. He blew his fingers slowly as he was in pain. Jackie laughed in amusementand a bit of satisfaction. I snickered and said, "That's great." -TVOutside the house. Fez climbed the trellis and got on the roof. He stepped carefully with his high heels and Eric was following him closely from behind. "Oh, these heels are killing me." "Okay, Fez, that's it. Give the ball back, and no one gets hurt." Eric and Fez circled around confrontationally on top of the Forman's roof. Eric lunged at Fez, but he avoided it, which made Eric slip off the roof. He screamed and managed to grab the gutter before he could fall. Shocked, Fez slowly inched towards the edge of the roof, trying to pull Eric back up. "I'll give you the ball, Eric. Just don't fall. I don't want anyone to fall. No falling–" "AHHH!" Fez slipped and fell down from the roof. He landed on his back, and he hurt his leg. Eric was still holding on to the gutter and was really regretting his decision to chase after Fez. -TV endI heard screaming from the yard while I was stretching. But before I could check it out, Jackie glanced at me and saw something on my abdomen. "Steven, you got a tattoo?" "What?" Shocked, I covered up my shirt immediately. "I don't have a tattoo." "I just saw your tattoo." She looked at me disdainfully. "What is that, an eel?" "No, it's a dragon." I sighed defeatedly. "Let me see." She pushed Kelso away and sat close to me. "NO!" I rejected her, face full of disbelief. "What– No, Jackie. It's a stupid tattoo anyway!" Kelso attacked me. I turned to him and said, "Man. This is getting old. I'm not getting with Jackie, so calm down already." Kelso looked embarrassed. "No, I'll wait for the commercial." Kelso laughed as he was watching the TV. I went outside alone and saw Fez sitting on the ground, touching his feet. Forman was still hanging on the gutter. "Alright. I got you." I wrapped my arms around Forman's waist and helped him get down. He was floating 3 feet above the ground. He could've just jumped down, but he was frozen from fear. The gutter was a mess because of him. The screws were undone halfway and it bent over at a 45 degrees angle. "Hyde." Fez called me. "Call Mrs. Forman. I'm really hurt." "Alright." I went back inside. Mrs. Forman was preparing some Halloween candy in the kitchen. "Steven! I've not seen you in a couple of days." She said giddily. "Yeah I've been busy with the editing." I took a candy, unwrapped it and took a bite before saying, "Fez fell down the roof. His leg is all busted up." "What?!" Mrs Forman widened her eyes in shock. She rushed to the slidingdoor to check up on Fez. I took another candy, and put a few of them into my pocket before going outside. Eric, Mrs. Forman, and I brought Fez back into Eric's room. Fez was put on top of a wheel chair that Red brought in. "Ayy!" Fez exclaimed in pain as Mrs. Forman checked his left leg. "Okay, Fez. Well... you got a bad sprain here." She smiled and bandaged his leg. "Not to- to mention a run in your stocking." Mrs. Forman laughed out loud. Red was standing in between Eric and I. He turned to his son and said grufly, with a hint of disappointment in his tone, "So, you were running around chasing him on the roof… because he took your little rubber ball." Forman replied, " It wasn't a ball. It was a SuperBall." I interjected, "Yeah, you should see that thing bounce. It's pretty super." Red turned to the both of us and said, "Dumb-asses." Mrs. Forman finished bandaging the leg. "Steven, Eric, um, get Fez a blanket. He needs to cover his- He just-" She said frantically, "He needs to cover up." Eric walked to his closet. He stepped on the step stool to grab the blanket at the top shelves. However, as he stood a foot off the ground, he whimpered. His face paled, and his hand began sweating. He gasped and fainted. I was close to him, and grabbed him instinctively. He fell into my arms like a princess. "Get off me, you girl." I threw him down to the floor, feeling embarrassed. "What-What happened?" Forman got his mind back. Mrs. Forman grabbed the blanket Eric brought down and covered up Fez's crotch with it. "Honey, you just- you had a little touch of vertigo there. So, just stay away from heights for a while and you'll be fine." Mrs. Forman advised him casually. Kelso got into the room with an excited smile. Jackie also followed along. "Oh, see? You see that, Jackie? Fez hurt himself. There is someone "stupider" than me." Kelso was elated. Jackie looked at him with a stern expression. "It's not his fault he's stupid. He's foreign. What's your excuse, stupid?" Kelso looked dissatisfied. "Well, I know one thing's for sure. There's definitely someone bitchier than me." "Oh, you better not mean me." Jackie looked ofended. Kelso enunciated every word. "Oh, I SO MEAN YOU!" "Ah!" Jackie gasped and walked out of the room. "Nice burn." I turned to him. "Top shelf." Forman added. "Thanks." Kelso grinned, accepting the compliment easily. Mrs. Forman looked outside the window as she finished taking care of Fez. "Well, now, that's strange. Midge's car's right there. Bob said she wasn't home." She added as she walked to the door, "In fact, I haven't seen her for days." I joked, "Maybe she went to the store and forgot where she lived." Mrs. Forman cracked up, but her face slowly turned worried as the realization of the joke being a possible truth hit her. "Oh, that's- that's wrong." She get out of the room and closed the door behind her. Forman brought Fez to the window, "Okay, Fez, this'll cheer you up." He gave Fez a binocular. "With these you can look into the Pinciotti's house and frequently enjoy… a naked Midge, up close and personal." Fez chuckled and said, "That's exactly how I like my naked Midges." "Oh, but, Fez, be warned. If Bob approaches a naked Midge, look away." Forman's face turned serious. "Oh, for the love of God, look away." As I had watched a couple of Hitchcock movies, I realized this scene was setting up another movie. Forman was parodying the 1958 movie, Vertigo. 'The peeping by the window was most likely to be from the movie, 'Rear Window'.' I read the synopsis and there would be a couple more spoofs in the episode. Birds, Psycho, and The Wrong Man. All popular movies by the legendary director, Alfred Hitchcock. As the episode paused, I asked Eric, "When did you start becoming a peeping tom? Not to mention, that's your girlfriend's mother." Eric was startled. Fez chuckled and said, "Yeah Eric. When did you become a huge pervert?" "I'm not a pervert!" He stammered. "If you don't want to see it, then–" Eric tried to grab the binocular back. But Fez pulled it away. "NO! I want to see it!" "See Hyde." Eric turned to me. "No one can escape the temptation of seeing a naked Midge." "Yeah, because Fez is a bonafide pervert." I teased him. "He's been lurching around whenever he sees people making out." I added, "He got chased away and rocks thrown at him. But he still does it because he's all sick inside." I turned to Forman and asked, "So what's your excuse?" Forman sighed and said, "I'm also… a bit sick inside." "Glad to hear you finally admit it." I teased. Chapter 132: Halloween (2) [Hyde POV] Mrs. Forman received a call from her neighbor to feed some birds. I overheard Red and Kitty's conversation as I was trying to grab some food in the kitchen. Red passed by me holding a bowl of soup for Fez. He stopped and grinned as he saw me. "Great. Give this to the foreign kid." Red ordered me. "Fine." I sighed, grabbed the soup from him and said, "But you make me a sandwich. I came down to make a sandwich." "Fine." Red sighed defeatedly. He knew this was a quid-pro-quo situation since he was uncomfortable around Fez when Fez was dressed like that. Like a transvestite hooker. I went upstairs to give the soup to Fez. "Any sign of naked Midge yet?" I asked casually as I stood beside him at the window, putting the soup on Forman's desk. He kept looking through his binoculars and replying, "No." "Just Bob dragging in big, heavy garbage bags." Fez said with disappointment. He asked me curiously, "What do you suppose is in 'em?" "Oh, I don't know. I'm guessing garbage." I replied sarcastically. "Or- You know how Mrs. Kitty said she hasn't seen Midge in a few days?" Fez lowered the binoculars. His face turned serious. "What if naked Midge is in the bags?" Dun Dun Dun (Ominous sound efect) …We stood there in silence for a while. "I mean, it's not… how do I say this, it's perfectly plausible for him to do that." I rubbed my chin in contemplation. "Spousal killing is a thing. Not to mention their rocky relationship in the last few months. No, past year." Fez nodded and said, "Is Bob finally having enough of Midge and her feminism rally?" "I don't think Midge went on a rally, but you're not wrong there. Bob really hated that Midge finally learned to think for herself." Fez added, "She said she's unhappy. She's leaving the family–" "And then Bob snapped and killed her." Fez and I looked at each other in horror. Then, we both burst out laughing. "No. Bob won't kill Midge. Would he?" Fez asked, smiling but with fear in his eyes. "I don't know Fez. Let's keep watching." Fez added while we went back to observing, "I saw Bob go on a date with another woman." "Sharon?" I guessed. "Yes. They had sex in the house when Midge wasn't here." "How do you know about that?" I asked, skeptical. "I might've already been in the house when I saw it." He replied awkwardly. "Doing what?" "Hey! We're investigating me, or–or we're investigating Bob?!" I narrowed my eyes at him with suspicion. Then, I gave up. "Well, they are in an open relationship. So that's not really it. Even Midge slept with a few guys too." Fez and I fell into a deep silence again. "But, Midge is in the movies now. Your movies." "So?" I asked, confused. "Isn't that usually how it starts? The wife got a bit of fame. The husband becomes… um… what is the word?" "Insecure? Afraid? Frantic? Panic? Bat-shit crazy?" "That's it." He snapped his finger. "And then, he killed the wife to prevent her from finding a better person, or a better life." I didn't believe in Fez's guesses… at first. But now, it's starting to make a lot of sense. "Ah, my back hurts." I went to Forman's bed and lied down for a bit. Grabbing one of Forman's Spiderman comic books, I began reading it while talking about the murder motive some more with Fez. "Maybe Midge's breast got a little saggy. And she wants a boob job. But Bob doesn't want to give her one." Fez commented. "If she wants to get one, I think Bob will definitely be the first one to support her." I said with disbelief. "But she doesn't need one." "She really doesn't." Fez nodded in agreement. Ten minutes later, Forman entered the room and walked to Fez. "Hey, who's the hot blonde?" Fez suddenly asked while he was peeping. I was interested so I approached them. Forman took the binocular from Fez. "That's not a hot blonde. It's Donna." His girlfriend was wearing a blonde wig, a trenchcoat, and large sunglasses to disguise herself. "Where is she going?" Forman asked with confusion. I snickered, "Maybe she's going trolling for men who don't piss her of." Forman really irked Donna off in the basement a couple minutes ago. He basically said she was boring, but not directly. Eric grimaced and said sarcastically, "That's so funny, Hyde." He kept staring at her. "I don't know where she's going, but I'm gonna follow her." As he took off the binocular, he realized he was leaning in the window. He whimpered again, and his eyes rolled back. Then, he fell into my arms again. I grunted with exasperation and said, "Would you stop doing that?" Then, I pushed him to the side. He didn't faint this time so he landed on his feet. He rushed outside to follow Donna. I sat on the windowsill and used the binoculars to peek into the Pinciotti's baby blue theme living room. "Hey, I don't know how this fits in your murder theory…" I turned to Fez and gave him the binocular. "But Bob's wearing an apron with guts all over it and holding a big carving knife." Bob's face was menacing. He studied the guts on the steel with intrigue. Fez gasped and said seriously, "He did kill Midge." Then, he whined. "And I never got to see her naked." "What are we going to do?" Fez asked me urgently. "Hmm. Maybe we should gather some evidence." I replied, sighing tiredly. "You should go inside the house again." I pointed at him. "Me?! Why me?!" Fez was taken aback. "Because I have a lot of people depending on me. You don't. You don't even have a girlfriend." "Damn it." Fez cursed, accepting his face. His eyes suddenly light up. "But my legs aren't working. So I can't sacrifice myself today." "Damn it." "Hyde, you're our only hope." I sighed and stood up. "Alright. I'm going in." "You should 'go in' Bob's fridge too, and see if you can bring back some beers." Fez suggested. "Fez, you don't even have to say that. That's the first thing I'm going to do." I grinned and left the room. "Some candy too!" He demanded. I closed the door behind me and walked down the hallway. Laurie suddenly rushed upstairs and shouted at me, "MOVE!" "Hey, did you earn your 10 bucks?" "AHH!" She screamed in frustration as the memories hit her again. I remembered she got pooped on by some birds she was feeding. It was a pretty good scene. Her embodiment of fear and despair was one of the highlights of the whole series. "Oh. Hyde. You're here. C-Can you help me?" Mrs. Forman said urgently. "Huh? Help with what?" I asked, confused. "Feed the bird at the neighbor's house." "Oh, so you trust me entering her house alone?" Mrs. Forman was taken aback. But, she forced a smile and said, "You're not the same as the old you. So I trust you. Just– Just feed the birds and come back quickly." "Alright." I shrugged and agreed easily. It took me 30 seconds to feed all of the birds. Then, I gave the keys back to Mrs. Forman. "It's done." "Great! Thank you so much!" Mrs. Forman hugged me happily. I chuckled and went outside the house again, this time heading to the Pinciotti's house. Bob left the backdoor unlocked most of the time, so I just waltzed in there. Turning my head left and right, I opened the fridge and stole two cans of beer, holding one in each hand. "Where's Bob?" I muttered and walked to the living room. -TVFez watched the Pinciotti's living room with the binoculars. His thoughts were displayed out loud for the audience. "Oh, Hyde, please be careful. I want you to catch some clues… but I don't want you stuck in the garbage bag with dead, naked Midge." Fez saw Hyde. "Oh, beers." Hyde danced in front of the window and then, he placed the beers down on the windowsills. Fez laughed and thought, "Hyde is so funny. Oh-oh, what is he going to do? Is he going to moon me?" Hyde was unbuckling his pants to moon Fez, but he flinched as he heard sounds in the kitchen. He ran away hurriedly to avoid being busted by Bob. "Oh, run, Hyde, run. Don't forget the beers!" Fez was frustrated. Bob walked into the living room and noticed the beers. He picked one up and was confused. Fez gasped, "The beers." The beers had exposed them. Bob finally saw Fez. Fez whimpered and rolled his wheelchair back a few feet. He tried to turn off the lights, but it flickered instead, causing Bob to finally decide to confront him. -Tv endsI followed Bob from behind as he stormed into the Forman's house and ran to Eric's bedroom. As he opened the door, Fez took pictures of him with Eric's camera. The flashes of light blinded Bob. "You can't kill me like you killed Midge, you big doofy!" Fez whimpered fearfully. Then, I walked into the room and closed the door, trapping Bob inside. Bob turned in confusion, but he wiped his hurting eyes and said, "Midge? I didn't kill Midge. She's in Chicago visiting her sister." Fez didn't believe him, "Oh, really? Then what was in the heavy garbage sacks?" "Garbage, you idiot." Bob replied casually. I added, "Oh, well, I guess that explains the giant knife… guts all over your apron. Oh, wait. No, it doesn't." Fez interjected, "Explain that, killer." Bob explained with frustration, "They were pumpkin guts. I was making Jack-o'-Lanterns." I realized I had misunderstood the situation, although I barely had any suspicions on Bob. This was a sitcom after all. There was no way a plotline where Bob killed his wife would make it on screen. "So, you're hiding Midge's body in a jack-o'-lantern. Clever plan." Fez said tauntingly. Bob sighed and heard something from his house. He peeked through the window and said, "Look, there's Midge now. Not dead or nothing." We all went to the window to check. Midge took off her shirt as she entered the living room, standing there only in a black bra. "Oh, goody. You can go now. Thanks." Fez said giddily and picked up the binoculars. Bob was startled. Midgie, no! Cover yourself!" He rushed outside to stop Midge. But Midge's hand was already on the bra clasp. She took it off and displayed everything by the window. I tried to wrestle the binocular from Fez's hand. "Give it. Give it!" He wasn't relenting, so I had to attack his weak point. His sore leg. I slapped his bandaged leg and he let go instantly. "Ay!" Fez whimpered in disappointment and pain. I checked out naked Midge and snickered to myself. "I'm really jealous of Forman now. How often do you think he did this?" Bob immediately tackled Midge to the ground as he entered the living room. Then, he alone stood up and pulled the curtains to a close. "Ah. The show's over! I only saw a naked Midge for a few seconds." Fez complained. "I also saw it for a couple seconds. I think it's really fair for both of us." I said casually and gave the binoculars back. "No. You definitely saw it longer." He argued. "Maybe two seconds more." I looked at him with disbelief. "We could've split that to get one second each! But you had to be selfish!" Fez complained. "Just for that, you're going down the stairs yourself." I stood up and left. "Wait. What if Bob comes back?" Fez whimpered fearfully. "Then you'll just have to sufer his wrath." I replied as I lay down on Forman's bed, trying to finish the comic book. "Ayy." Fez rolled his wheelchair backwards and moved outside the door frantically. I read the comic for a bit there. Fifteen minutes later, the wheelchair came back. But this time, another person was on it. "Hyde." Forman greeted me with a confused expression. "Why are you reading my comic? You never read comics." "I was bored. What happened to you?" I asked, slightly worried. He waved it of, saying, "It's fine. I just fell off the water tower." "Ah." I nodded in understanding. "So, we all got hurt today." "Huh– Wait, we really did." Eric widened his eyes in realization. Fez's leg. My back. His leg. And Kelso was tormented by a paper boy, almost having an airplane fly over his head. He had to duck roll to avoid it, causing bruises all over his body. Donna entered the room and chased me out. "Go to the basement, you basement dweller." I grimaced and said, "Hey. I've slept on your boyfriend's bed more times than you do." "What?" Donna was confused and weirded out. Eric laughed awkwardly and said, "No. He hasn't." "Well, he kinda did." Donna said with a teasing expression. "Great. Why did you give her new materials? You know he's going to use it against me later." Forman scolded me. "Yeah. Against you." I teased and walked away. "You kids have fun. Forman, I'm borrowing this." "No! That's a collectible– Damn you Hyde." The best part was him not being able to chase me. I could even take his G.I Joe, and he couldn't do anything about it. Just like taking candy from a baby. … The episode ended shortly after. My back stopped hurting the second the system notification came out. "Oh. Nice." I stretched my back with satisfaction. All of the Halloween decorations disappeared too. Everything returned to the ordinary summer days, like the special episode never even happened. [Episode 4: Too old to Trick or Treat, too young to die] [Old Rating: 7.3 New Rating: 7.4 Rating point: +0.1] "It took only an hour and a half. Nice." I was walking to my bike when I bumped into Laurie and Kelso. Laurie wore a slutty party dress with shiny sequins and revealing her deep cleavage. "Kelso, when did you get a hooker?" I mocked with a serious expression. Kelso laughed and said, "BURN!" Then, he whispered to me, "She really does look like a hooker." Laurie stuck her tongue out mockingly and said, "As if you could even aford a hooker." Then, she turned to me. "And you! You don't even have anything to do on a Friday night." "Not to brag, but I'm going to go have sex with a busty blonde right now." I bragged. Kelso widened his eyes and he grabbed my shoulders. "Are you having a party?" "No. Just us." "Where?" "Like hell I'm going to tell you." I said with disbelief. He would've crashed the house and threw a party there if he knew where I was hanging. It was in his nature. "You should throw a party!" He said decisively. "It's been months! When was the last time you threw a party just for fun?" "Last week?" I looked at him with confusion. "You were there." "That's the wrap up party. It doesn't count!" He whined. "Kelso, shut up! Let's go. We're already late to the party!" Laurie pulled him away. "Yeah Kelso. You can't be a pimp if you let your girl go alone." I said mockingly. Laurie gave me a middle finger as she walked to Kelso's van. Then, she threw him inside. "Hyde! Party!" Kelso shouted as he pushed his head out of the driver's window, but Laurie pulled him back in. "Drive!" She ordered him. "PARTYYYYYYY!" He screamed as he drove away. I shrugged and went back to the vacation home using the bike. Sarah was watching TV when I entered. She was caught off guard with Oreo on her lips. "What– You said three hours?!" She stood up and brushed off the crumbs immediately. I knew she was bored. There was really nothing to do in the town at night. I chuckled and said, "Hey. What do you think about turning this into a party?" "A party?" She narrowed her eyes slightly. "I'm fine with it." She agreed. "Great. It'll be a small party. We're keeping things classy." … Almost everyone from my school who's in the same year as me was at the party. And they brought guests with them. They jumped inside the pool, played with the water gun, and sang karaoke– which I had custom made to play only songs in this era. Jackie was singing an ABBA song in the living room. Donna and Forman were shooting water guns at each other. It was only 9.30 and it was such a hot night that the water gun felt necessary. I sat on the deck, sharing a seat with Sarah. She sat on top of me, wrapping her arms around my neck. We made out while she was wearing a bikini. I shoved my face in between her two, very supple and amazingly elastic breasts. Then, I motorboated her a bit. She laughed out loud as it tickled her. Fez swam inside the pool and stopped near me. "Hey Hyde. Why are you not swimming?" He asked. "Because he has tattoos–" I cupped Sarah's mouth before she could expose me. "No, I'm fine, Fez. Just go swim. Your parents gave you a 10 O'clock curfew. So don't blame me if you're late again." Fez grumbled and splashed the water with annoyance, akin to a kid throwing tantrums. "I missed one magazine. And now I'm grounded." he whined. "What magazine?" Sarah asked me curiously. "Porn. Nothing else but porn." I said playfully and kissed her neck. She giggled and said, "Tell me the truth. The tattoos are fake, right? That's why you aren't going in? It'll dissolve in the water. "Not really." I grimaced and pointed to Chuck and his girlfriend. Chuck was behind her, and they weren't moving. They were at the corner, having a moment in their own little world. "They are definitely having sex in the pool." I muttered. "What?!" Sarah was shocked. "Just observe closely. She's mufling her moans. Him biting her ear. She tried to stand still, but she inched forward a few times in a minute. Just look at their faces. It's full of ecstasy." I grinned and added, "Once Chuck busts a nut, everyone in the pool will get pregnant. Sperm could travel through water you know. I don't want you to get pregnant." As I said that, every girl there immediately rushed out of the pool, leaving only the men there. Chuck was startled. He looked around in confusion. Fez dived into the water with a goggle on and slowly made his way back to me. "They are really having sex. I'm going back in." "Enjoy it, Fez." I chuckled and stood up. "So, do you want to use the private jacuzzi inside the master bedroom instead?" "Yes please!" Sarah did a baby talk and hugged my waist giddily. Before we could go there, we were blocked by a jealous girl. "NO! We're partying! So stay here and party!" Jackie scolded us with a determined face. "But–" "I'll cut you, new girl! Don't test me!" "Okay. Fine." Sarah was startled and she quickly turned around. We sat on the couch and watched the water gun fight on the lawn. "Hey, I have another question." "You sure have a lot." I teased. "But shoot it anyway." She giggled and said, "I'm really curious, so I have to ask. Why aren't you dating? I know with me, you know I'm going back to college. But what about other girls? Like that… Jackie. She's really pretty." Then she whispered underneath her breath. "Pretty insane." I shuddered and said, "How much did she pay you to say that?" "Wait, she's paying? How much can I charge?" She joked. I chuckled and said, "What's the use of even dating anyway? It's not like I can keep them around." "Aww." She tilted her head slightly, looking at me with pity. "So a girl broke your heart once, and you decide you're done?" "It's not a question of whether I'm done. It's the actual universe. The universe has a problem with me dating anyone. So they'll do everything to separate me from them." Sarah giggled, thinking it was a joke. "If the universe has a problem with you, shouldn't you fight them?" "How?" I said, leaning in close and bopped her nose with my finger. She scrunched her nose cutely and said, "Just hide from them. Make sure the universe never knows you're dating. Oh, but make sure your future girlfriend knows." I grimaced for a few seconds, before realizing the method might be feasible. 'Don't bring them into the plot. Then, it might work. As long as I keep it a secret till 1980, then I win.' I grabbed Sarah's hand and said suddenly, "You're really smart. Do you want to make a baby with me?" She blushed and said, "Jackie's blocking the door to the bedroom. Unless you want to be the next couple who does it in front of everyone, just holster it in until the party ends." I grinned and said, "You've never gone to a party in a small town, have you?" "What? Does the small town party never stop?" She said playfully. "No. It usually ends right about.." I checked my watch. It was 9.59 pm. As soon as the clock hit 10, I said, "...Now!" Everyone said goodbyes and left the house in a hurry, leaving Sarah speechless. "So, you were saying?" I teased her and pulled her closer to me. We began making out again on the couch. Suddenly, Jackie used the karaoke microphone to shout at us. "NO!"
